Ways to Love Your Brother

We moved back upstairs, and sat on the couch in the living room. My mom was in the kitchen, making dinner. Which smelled goo, by the way.

Slouching down in the cushions, I folded my hands over my stomach, and closed my eyes.

"I'm tired," I announced, my chest rising and falling with my sigh.

"Really," Frank asked, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, and pulling me close so I could rest my head on his chest.

"P.E. is horrible," I complained, "Twelve minutes...."

"I can do it.:"

"Well, you don't smoke," I said, "And have asthma," I added.

"Yeah, that is a problem."

"And then Coat Rogers is a dick."

"And?..."

"Shut it," I said, "I don't have him as a track coach ya know."

"Yeah, that's true," I could feel Frank stroke my hair soothingly, relaxing me and my even more tired mind.

From the kitchen, I could hear my mom humming The Hills Are Alive as pots clanged and the food sizzled. The heavenly smell of eggs and bacon filled the house.

"Do you want to stay for dinner," I asked, almost subconsciously.

"Sure," Frank said, "Are you going to be at my track meet on Sunday?"

Looking up at him, I smiled, "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Leaning forward, I placed my lips on his, and heard several things drop to the floor.

Pulling away, I saw my mom standing in the dinning room, which lead into the living room.

"Mom, I-"

"Michale. James. Way," my mom stammered. From where I was standing, I could see the tears brimming her eyes.

"Momimgay," I said, running my words together, hoping she heard me, and would understand, making the twinge of guilt in my chest go away.

"Mikey...." my mom said again, making the twinge of guilt grow into a stab of guilt.

"Mom...." I said more slowly, "I'm gay," I felt myself become rigid, bracing myself for her outburst.

"Mikey....Come here," mom said.

My body, on autopilot, moved itself around the couch, and crossed the room, while my mind was screaming 'no'.

Stopping in front of mom, I once again prepared and braced myself for her outburst, but found myself, instead, flinching when she wrapped her arms around me.

"Ummmm...." I said, totally confused.

"I'm sorry," mom said, pulling away. "I shouldn't be over reacting like this."

"No, mom," I said, "I should be the one who's sorry. I should have told you sooner," mom hugged me again, and this time I hugged her back.

Pulling away, mom smiled brightly at me, before placing a kiss on my cheek.

"I have to set the table, so you can go back to what ever it was you were doing."

"Could Frank stay for dinner?"

"Well sure," mom smiled and picked up the plates.

Smiling, I turned back to Frank only to find him red-faced, and shaking with laughter.

"What," I asked, coming towards him.

His shaking increased, as he placed his hand over his mouth,and practically doubled over.

"What's so funny," I demanded, I took another step forwards, and he took a step backwards, heading for the staircase.

I gave a sigh, and charged at him, chasing him up the stairs, and into mine and Gerard's room.

Turning around, he opened his arms, and grabbed a hold of me as I ran into him. He staggered momentarily, but managed to push me on my bed, and placed his lips on mine.

Little did we know, Gerard was laying in his bed on the other side of our room, watching us with hate filled eyes.

"Get a room," he said, his words biting at me.

Frank pulled away from me, and we both turned to look at my brother. I looked at him with sorrow, Frank with daggers.

"We're in one," Frank replied sourly.

Ever since Gerard and I broke up, and Frank and I started dating, life between all of us has been awkward.

Gerard won't look at me, or barley even talk to me for that matter. And Frank has kind of become possessive.... But not to the point where it's becoming a problem.

Ray and Matt are afraid to say anything that involves my name and Gee's in the same sentence.

I don't really now what's going to happen with the band now that so much trauma is going on, but I have a feeling that it's not good.

"Well fine," Gerard said, "I'll just leave then," he gathered up all of his art supplies, and left the room.

I might have imagined it, but I swear I saw tears in his eyes.

He slammed the bedroom door behind him, and Frank turned back to me.

"Now," he said, "Where were we," he gave me a sly smile, and his lips advanced on mine.

Running his hands up my shirt, a moan escaped my lips, and was lost in our kiss. I myself slipped my hands up his shirt, and was about to pull his shirt off over his head, when he stopped.

"What's wrong," I asked.

Frank didn't answer. Instead, he rolled off of me, revealing a bloody spot on his pant leg. My heart stopped beating.

"What is this," Frank asked, looking at me, "Mikey? Why are you bleeding?"

I didn't answer.

"Mikey?"

"I'm sorry Frank," I said, getting up.

"Mikey, get back here now," Frank said, up set.

I shook my head, and tried to make it to the door before Frank could even get out of bed, but he was faster than what I thought.

He grabbed a hold of me, and pulled me away from the door, forcing me back into my room.

"Gerard," he called, "Gerard!"

"No, no please," I begged, "Don't call him."

But my plea was too late. Gerard came thought the door, and saw Frank holding me from behind.

"Close the door," Frank demanded.

Gerard did as he was told, "What's going on?"

"We were.... You know, and Mikey started bleeding."

"Bleeding? Where," Gerard took a step forward.

"No! No, please. let me go," I cried.

"Mikey, hold still," Gerard said.

"We need to undo your pants," Frank said.

"No," I shouted.

"Gerard, you're gunna have to do it," Frank said, ignoring my pleas.

Gerard nodded, and reached for my pants. I tried to wriggle away from him, but my tries were no good.

Getting past my button and zipper, Gerard gently eased my pants down. I closed my eyes, as both of theirs landed on one of my many cuts.

"Mikey...." Gerard whispered. He looked up at me, his golden eyes were swimming in tears.

"Oh my God," Frank joined in. Reaching down, he gently traced the broken cut, gathering a finger of blood.

I, on the other hand, was in tears. Shaking violently with each sob.

Then, a strange sting came to the left side of my face. Gasping, I looked at my brother's angry face, with tears still in his eyes.

"What the hell are fucking thinking you mother fucking punk," he yelled, "Huh? What sick thought is going through your twisted dumb fuck head when you do this shit?"

I closed my eyes as his words sank in, and I reopened them.

Staring straight into his beautiful, yet broken eyes, I pathetically yelled, "It's you!"