Ways to Love Your Brother

I froze. I couldn't believe it. I was looking into the face of the man that I thought disappeared off of the face of the earth.

"Gerard?" I whispered.

Not waiting for an answer, I took the drinks, walked past my friend and out to my car.

the entire drive back to the apartment was a complete daze. In fact, I don't remember any of it, and am still surprised that I didn't get pulled over or anything.

Really, the next thing I remember happening, is sitting with Travis, eating dinner. Derrick and Jason must have gone home or something, for they were no where to be found.

"You know what. Forget it." Travis said, bringing me back, "You don't want to talk with me or my friends. Fine."

He stood from our table and left the room. Getting up, I followed him.

"Trav." I called, "Baby, please."

"No. you don't want to talk so why should I?"

"Babe, it's not.... I've had a lot on my mind. Please."

"Too much on your mind you don't want to let me in on it?"

"I ran into someone while I was out."

"Who?" Travis looked at me, his expression a feeling I couldn't place, "Who could you have run into that put you into the state of a walking zombie?"

"Gerard." I answered.

My voice must have been somber, for the expression on his face softened a little. Turning around, he sat down on our bed.

"i don't understand." he said, "How could see Gerard do that to you?"

I haven't seen him in three years." I knelt down in front of him, "I haven't spoken, seen, glimpsed, written to him in three years. It was as if he never existed."

"But he's your brother."

"I sighed, "He was kicked out of our home." as I looked at him, tears filled my eyes as I remembered the darkest night of my life.

"Why?"

"My mother and father... they caught us doing something together. My mom refers to our actions the 'most sinful thing two brothers could do.'"

"What?"

"We're both gay, Trav." I said.

A moment of confusion fluttered in his eyes, then it clicked.

"You were caught sleeping together. Weren't you."

A tear slipped from my eye, and that's all it took before I was sobbing.

"I loved him." I cried, hunched over, crying into my hands, "We loved each other and they tore us apart."

I let it all go. My whole body shook as I sobbed shamelessly into my hands. My glasses were askew and practically hung off of one ear. I was a reak.

I really did expect Travis to leave the room or call me a sick pervert and break up with me. But instead, he slid off of the bed, kneeling down in front of me, and wrapped his arms around me.

"It's okay, Mikey. It's okay." he pressed his lips to my head and held me tighter.

Pulling away from him, I looked at him, letting him know that I was lost.

"You-you aren't disgusted?" I asked, wiping my eyes.

"A little." he said, then smiled, "But after reading a few incest books, you're okay with it... a bit."

I managed to smile a little, and Travis placed a sweet kiss on my lips.

*_*A week later*_*

Today was my day off. Travis was at the book store, and I was cleaning dishes, listening to the radio and singing along to the songs I liked.

Knock. Knock.

I sighed and dropped the sponge I was using and grabbed a towel. Drying my hands on my way to the door, I looked at the clock in the living room. It was a little past noon. It was probably Derrick and Jason.

Assuming it was, I opened the door saying, "Sorry guys, he's at work."

"Who's at work?" came a waytoo familiar voice.

Looking out side, I saw Gerard standing on our welcome mat, a package in one hand, and a small case of beer in the other.