I Want to Be the Prettiest Wreck You've Ever Seen
Chapter Three: Mistaken Identity
I stood around in the dark field while everyone else was moving around me. I realized there was nothing for me to do to help so I decided to sit down, but the ground was all soggy and gross. I paused and then remembered the thick quilt in the trunk of my car from the last 4th of July. I prayed that Kevin hadn’t removed it. I skipped back to the car, tripping over rocks and bumps in the ground on my way. I grabbed the quilt, my iPod and my ear phones and headed back to the large clearing. I picked a spot farthest from where they would be filming and settled down. I folded the thick quilt in half and lay on my back. I stuck my ear buds in my ears and turned on my music, closing my eyes, hoping to fall back to sleep. I wasn’t comfortable that way so I rolled over on my stomach, putting my head on my arms and relaxed.
I could tell the sky around me was getting lighter and I could hear voices approaching-just two of them. I didn’t raise my head-I was so close to sleep. They passed me and continued to the field.
“Hey, guys.” Kevin said to them. “Hey-there’s someone I want you to meet.” He said happily. “Monica!” He called. I froze-pretending to be asleep. He seemed to realize his mistake because he didn’t call me after that. “Never mind.” I heard him whisper. I bit my lip and forced back my tears. Now would not be a good time to start thinking about my family.
I just about had myself under control when I heard a whole group of people coming towards me. I smiled into the quilt as I heard Jackson’s voice. I knew I shouldn’t be getting so attached to him. The chances were extremely good that he wouldn’t return the feelings-no boy ever has. The guys back home were all about my twin sister-Monica. The only guy who ever acknowledged me as a real person-not just Monica’s sister, was Justin Michaels. And now he only thought of me like a little sister. He was my boxing buddy-he made a good target.
The group had reached me and someone dropped something on me. Kellan’s coat.
“Thanks.” I mumbled sarcastically. I then felt four more coats drop onto my back. I groaned in protest, but didn’t move.
“How’d you sleep?” Rob asked. I lifted my head so he could hear me.
“I’ll let you know once I’ve gotten some sleep.” I said.
“What do you mean?” Kellan asked, squatting next to me.
“I only got an hour and a half of sleep this morning.” I explained.
“I bet I could help with that.” He winked. I rolled me eyes and pushed his knee so he fell over backwards.
“You love me.” He laughed, standing up and brushing himself off.
“Mon-“ Kevin started to call again. I clenched my fists and shot him a death glare. “Maggie!” He corrected himself. I blew out a resigned sigh and started to get to my feet. Kellan picked me up, lifting me by my elbows and set me on my feet.
“Thanks.” I mumbled. I didn’t look at any of them as I started across the field. Ashley, Nikki and Kristen caught up to me.
“Are you alright, hon?” Ashley asked. I nodded before looking at them and shaking my head miserably.
“What’s the matter?” Nikki asked worriedly.
“Just-“ I started, but decided now wasn’t the time or the place. “My name’s Maggie.” I mumbled, knowing they wouldn’t understand.
“Alright.” Ashley said uncertainly. We reached Kevin and he looked at me apologetically. I tried to smile, but it came out as more of a grimace.
“Hey, Peter, Liz.” Ash, Nikki, and Kristen greeted.
“Hello, girls.” The man name Peter greeted. The woman just smiled.
“Peter, Liz-this is my God daughter, Maggie.” He introduced, saying my name clearly, making up for the two times earlier. I smiled politely at them as I shook their hands.
“Kevin has told us so much about you.” Liz said, smiling warmly.
“Oh gosh.” I joked.
“All good things, of course.” Peter said. I smiled thankfully. The guys had come closer and I realized Taylor wasn’t with them.
“He’s sleeping in.” Ashley said quietly in my ear, answering my unasked question. I smiled at her. I looked around and saw that they were all in baseball-ish attire. My eyes landed on Jackson and I had to force myself to remember how to breathe. His white shirt with blue sleeves was tight across his well defined muscular chest, accenting his sculpted torso and broad shoulders perfectly. I quickly dropped my gaze to my flip flops.
“Nice shoes.” Kellan commented. I looked up just in time to see Nikki back hand him in the stomach and I realized he was talking to me. I laughed.
“It was five thirty when I got dressed. You’re lucky I’m out of pajamas, let alone almost decent enough.” I grumbled.
“No-you’re lucky you’re out of pajamas.” He corrected. I tilted my head, confused. He just shook his head. “It’s a good thing you’re hot.” He said before starting to walk away with everyone else. I stood stock still. Me? Hot? He’s got to be kidding. I’ve never been called hot in my life. I blinked as Rob grabbed my hand and pulled me along.
“Are you ok?” He asked, but I was still too dumbfounded to speak. “Is she ok?” He asked someone else.
“I dunno.” I vaguely heard Kellan’s voice. “Give her a kiss, Prince charming-snap her out of it.” He laughed. That snapped me out of it.
“Nope-I’m good.” I said quickly. Kristen chuckled.
“I think she’s saying she doesn’t want you kissing her, Rob.” She said, nudging his arm. I sighed-there was no way to get out of this nicely. Rob slung his arm around my shoulders coolly.
“We’re just takin’ the mick.” He said before kissing the top of my head.
“I know.” I sighed and then stopped talking. Jackson was texting again, but not talking.
There was another half hour wait as the crew finished getting set up.
“Alright-we have a new cell phone person.” Kevin announced to the actors just before they were about to start. I had no idea what he was talking about. “Moni-“ He started. I bit my lip hard. “Sorry-Maggie.” He corrected, glancing at me. I kept my eyes firmly on the ground. “You know the deal-turn them off, in the bucket they go-you can have them back after we’re done.” He said in a monotone voice, handing me a metal pail. I held it by the handle as everyone took out their cell phones, shut them off and dropped them into the bucket I was holding. Everyone but Jackson smiled at me. He didn’t even look at me. I frowned, but didn’t let it get to me. I figured he was just tired. I’d be rude, too, if I had to actually do work at such an un-Godly hour. Instead I just have to sit around holding the Bucket-O’-Cell phones.
Kevin instructed them on the first shot they were doing and came over to stand next to me. We were silent for a minute.
“I’m sorry, Maggie.” He said quietly. I just nodded. “It’s just...I’m so used to yelling at your sister.” He said quietly. “You were always the good one. It’s just instinct to yell her name instead of yours.” He said softly. I turned to face him.
“I was the good one?” I asked, a little surprised. That hadn’t been the way I remembered things. I was always the one getting yelled at while Monica was perfect.
“Yeah-you’re sister was always getting into something or another.” He said. “Just between you and me-you were my favorite of my favorites.” He said. I tried to figure out what he said, but I just confused myself even more.
“Say again.” I said. He chuckled.
“Out of my favorites, both you and your sister included, you were my most favorite.” He said again. That made more sense.
“Oh-alright.” I paused while he said more instructions. He called action. “Can you just make a conscious effort to call me Maggie, not Monica?” I requested.
“I’ll do my best, kiddo.” He nodded. ‘That’s all I ask for.’ I thought.
I watched the scene playing in front of me. Ashley was on a pitcher’s mound while Rob and Kellan were in the outfield and Nikki was up to bat. She swung and ran around the bases, well, with a wire attached to her back as Rob took off for the patch of trees at the back of the field. I was watching in amusement as Nikki slid into home plate. There was a pause and then I could hear Kristen say ‘You’re out.’ From across the field I faintly heard Kellan call ‘Come on, babe-it’s just a game.’ I smiled as Peter was up to bat. He swung hard, his scarf swinging from the force. He took off running, same as Nikki. Kellan and Rob ran across the field towards each other and jumped at the same time, pretending to crash into each other. I winced as they both fell to the ground.
“Cut!” Kevin called. Everyone stopped and looked at Kevin. He stepped away from me. “Can we do that again? This time, try jumping as high as you can.” He said. Rob and Kellan ran back to their original marks. “And...action!” Kevin called. They looked at an imaginary spot in the sky and started running. They both jumped at the same time and actually crashed into each other. I gasped and quickly covered my mouth, hoping I didn’t ruin the shot. I could hear Rob and Kellan laughing as they stood up.
“Everyone ok?” Kevin asked. Kellan stuck his hand up in the air. “Great.” He turned to me. “Stay here, Mags.” He said. I nodded as he jogged over. “Let’s do that again, but this time, let’s have one person go at a time, ok?” He asked and they laughed. I felt my phone in my pocket vibrate and I was grateful that I usually keep the ringer off. I looked at the caller ID and saw it was Justin calling. I debated ignoring it, but decided I didn’t want to. So, not to bother anyone, I walked a little ways away into the forest behind me. I found a broken tree trunk and sat down, facing the direction I had come in.
“Hey.” I answered.
“Hey. How are you?” He asked cautiously.
“Getting better.” I answered, thinking about Jackson.
“That’s good-I miss my boxing partner.” He said. I smiled slightly.
“I miss mine, too.” I assured him.
“So when do I get to come visit you?” He asked.
“Whenever you want. I’ll be here for a while.” I said.
“Alright. Well, my next break is in about four weeks- a few days after your birthday.” He said.
“So you’ll be my birthday present?” I asked before I could stop myself.
“If that’s what you want.” He said and I could hear the smile in his voice-I was acting like a girl finally.
“It is. And a rematch...match.” I said. He chuckled. So much for being a girl.
“Alright-it’s a deal.” I beamed.
“I can’t wait.” I said honestly. “Hey, Jut-I have to go. Can I call you later?”
“Of course.” We hung up and I found my way out, only tripping a few times. I entered the clearing in time to see Jackson messing around with the bat in his hand. I watched him spin it around his hand, mesmerized by his incredibly graceful movements. He glanced at me and dropped the bat. I quickly lowered my gaze, thoroughly flustered. He had looked mad when he looked at me just then, like he wished I wasn’t around. I heard him sigh as he retrieved the bat angrily.
“Jackson-what was that you were doing?” Kevin asked.
“Oh-just messing around.” He said off-handedly.
“Can you do it again?” Kevin asked. He nodded.
“Sure.”
“Paul.” Kevin said, waving to one of the camera guys and pointing to Jackson. “I think you should be watching Ashley, like you’re trying to intimidate her with how relaxed Jasper is.” Kevin said to Jay.
“Sure.” Jackson said again, avoiding looking at me as he flipped the bat. I sighed. Something was definitely wrong. I watched him step up to the plate and my heart beat started racing. He looked so perfect, standing there. Kevin let the scene play out a few minutes longer before it started to rain heavily.
“Cut!” He called. The crew rushed to cover up the cameras as the cast hurried to stand under the tent where I was. I held the Bucket O’ Cell Phones out and one by one everyone grabbed theirs, Jackson had Ashley get his for him.
“Where did you go before?” Nikki asked me. I looked up.
“What?” I asked, not remembering.
“Before-you went into the woods.” She hinted. Then it clicked-Justin.
“Oh-I had a phone call from a...friend.” I said.
“A boyfriend?” Ashley teased. I let out a sharp laugh.
“Not likely.” I said dryly. Been there-done that.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kellan asked. I just shook my head. I glanced at Jackson quickly to see him staring at me intently.
“Excuse me.” I said before walking out of the tent, going exactly five feet and walking directly into Cam, knocking him down into the mud and falling on top of him. “Shit!” I said loudly. “Cam-I’m so sorry.” I rushed, standing up and offering him my hand. I felt my face burning. He chuckled and jumped right up.
“It’s all good. Are you alright?” He asked. I nodded, wiping below my eyes, just in case. “You sure?” He asked, trying to peer into my eyes. I nodded.
“I got you all mud.” I sighed. He laughed and moved me to the side, out of the way.
“Mud is supposed to be good for your skin. I’m fine, Maggie.” He assured me. “Are you?” He asked. I threw my arms around his firm waist, pressing my face into his chest. He hesitated only a moment before wrapping his arms tightly around me. It only took me a few minutes to recover before I pulled away. He looked at me questioningly.
“I just needed a hug.” I said, deciding it helped a great deal. He smiled.
“Any time.” I smiled back before side stepping him and going to find Kevin. I had gone about twenty feet when someone caught my arm. I turned to see Ashley, Kristen and Nikki.
“What’s going on?” Nikki asked. I shrugged casually.
“Nothing-just going to find Kevin.” I said, wiping rain off my face. I was now completely soaked.
“That’s not what we meant.” Ash said. I frowned.
“I’m just over tired.” I said. “I get...emotional when I’m sleep deprived.”
“Ok-who’s Monica?” Kristen asked. I bit my lip so hard I made it bleed.
“That’s a story for a different day. Please don’t make me say it now.” I pleaded. They seemed taken aback with my begging.
“Alright.” Nikki nodded.
“I do have a question.” I said quietly.
“Sure.” Kristen said, a friendly smile in her voice.
“What’s up with Jackson? Did I piss him off?” I asked nervously-hoping there was a good reason for the silent treatment I was getting from him.
“Do you know-I’ve never seen him act like that to one person?” Ashley said. My heart sank-so I had done something.
“When we all first got here-he was really quiet, shy, but then he kind of opened up. I mean-he was fine with you yesterday, right?” Nikki commented. I nodded miserably.
“I’m sure he’s just in a bad mood.” Kristen tried to assure me. I shrugged, trying to act fine. Kevin was headed towards us, but I wasn’t in the mood for talking. The guys had all come out of the tent and were heading towards us as well. I refrained from groaning.
“Can you give these to Kevin for me?” I asked, digging my car keys out of my pocket and holding them out. “I’m going for a walk.” I said. Kristen nodded apologetically, taking them from me. I half smiled and started walking away from everyone.
“Maggie!” Rob called as I passed them, but I ignored him.
“Mon-!” I heard Kevin’s voice over the pounding rain. I started walking faster, sloshing muddy water up my pant legs. My flip flops were getting caught in the mud so I stopped to take them off, very aware of everyone watching.
I shoved my ear buds in my ears and started my iPod, turning up the music as loud as I could stand it. I had reached my car and I tossed my flip flops on the floor of the back seat. I slammed the door shut and kept walking bare foot.
I debated calling Justin but decided that wouldn’t be a good idea. He had told me when he broke up with me that when I decided to act like a girl to give him a call. Well-this was definitely a girl thing-but I’m pretty sure not what he meant. I could go talk to Taylor, but it was still kind of early-around ten thirty or so, and plus he didn’t need to hear about my stupid problems.
So I walked around the almost empty streets, just thinking. I shouldn’t even be upset that he’s not speaking to me. I mean-I barely know him. I shouldn’t like him as much as I do. I decided I’d give him a few days to get over what ever I did. If, by then, he still wasn’t speaking to me then I’d be better off. As hard as I tried to convince myself of that , the fact of the matter was-it was never going to be true.
Now I just had to figure out what to do with Kevin. If he called me Monica one more freaking time I was going to snap.
I had finally calmed down to the point where I could go back to Kevin’s. I traipsed back to the house, tripping every once in a while.
My car was in the drive way along with a large jeep I recognized as Kellan’s character, Emmett’s car. I frowned. I tripped up the steps and into the house. I set my iPod and phone on the front hall table and started for the stairs, seeing everyone but Jackson and Taylor sitting around, talking. I waved at them as I went up the stairs, pulling off my wet clothes as I went. I stumbled into the bathroom and turned on the water as hot as I could take it before climbing in. I scrubbed my skin until it was raw, trying to get rid of the mud and the cold.
“Out, damned spot, out.” I mumbled to myself as I scrubbed. I wrapped my hair up in a towel and wrapped another one tight around my body. I went into my room and got dressed in a pair of dark blue basketball shorts and a tank top and went downstairs.
“You ok, kid?” Kevin asked as I sat on the arm of the couch next to Kellan.
“Yeah, sorry, I just needed to think.” I said. He nodded. Kellan pulled me into his lap, holding me to his body and lacing his fingers loosely around my waist.
“Your skin is all red.” He commented, resting his mouth against my bare shoulder.
“Yeah, from the water.” I said, leaning my head back against his shoulder.
“So-what shot are we doing tonight?” Kristen asked. So that meant we weren’t going out to dinner.
“I think we’ll do the scene in the ballet studio-it’s going to take some time to get it right.” Kevin said. “Maybe a few nights in a row, and then we’ll take a break from the night shots.” He said, nodding to himself. “Tomorrow-if the rain lets up, we’ll finish the baseball scene.”
“Alright.” Everyone said, agreeing. Kellan nudged me.
“Are you coming tonight?” He asked. I shook my head.
“I need more sleep so I can be normal tomorrow instead of the emo child I was today.” He chuckled and Rob looked confused.
“What’s an emo child?” He asked. I smiled.
“It’s someone who acts all...emotionally unstable and child like.” I explained as best I could.
“Oh.” He said.
“So you’ll be on set tomorrow?” Ashley asked. I nodded.
“Unless you guys don’t want me there.” I said. Kellan’s strong arms tightened around me.
“Of course we do.” He said defensively. “All of us.” He added.
“Then I’ll be there.” I said, feeling grateful for them. Cam grinned. I noticed he had changed clothes. I must have looked like I was going to apologize again because he winked.
“Seriously-I’m fine.” He said. Everyone just looked at him, but I nodded in defeat.
We sat around for a few more minutes before everyone stood up, Kellan still holding onto me. I tried to step away, but he wasn’t budging.
“You’re going to be the death of me.” I grumbled. He chuckled and let me go, kissing my cheek and then he disappeared out the door, followed by Kevin. Both Rob and Cam kissed my cheeks at the same time before following Kevin. I gave each of the girls a hug as they, too, left.
I sat in the empty house for a while, just flipping through the channels on the large TV. Finally I got bored enough that I called Justin back.
Surprisingly we talked for four hours. Then he had to go and I was bored again so I cleaned the entire house and moved my room around. I made a salad with grilled chicken for dinner and decided it was too early for bed so I moved the living room around. By the time I was done with that it was nine-I could go to sleep.
I woke myself up the next morning to see I had slept twelve hours straight-it was now nine in the AM. I wondered why Kevin didn’t wake me up when he left. I got in the shower, did my stuff and got dressed in a denim skirt that was frayed at the bottom, black leggings and a black tank top with tiny white stars on it. I laced up my cons, brushed my teeth, straightened my hair and went to walk out the back door. On the table was a laminated card with my picture and the Twilight Set Pass in bold with my name in smaller print under it. I grinned and put the lanyard it was attached to around my neck. Under that was a note in Kevin’s chicken scratch:
Come to the field
I grinned and went out to my car. I started it, cranked the heat and drove to the field, parking next to Nikki’s car. I climbed out and headed for the tent from yesterday. Today Taylor was inside, short hair instead of the wig. I smiled when I saw him and he stood up to hug me.
“I missed you yesterday.” He said quietly because they were filming. I nodded sheepishly.
“Just a bad day.” I whispered. He nodded and left it at that. “Let’s go outside-we can see better.” I said, taking his hand and pulling him towards the flap of the tent. He smiled and snatched a sweat-shirt off one of the chairs.
“Kevin brought it for you-he said you’d forget one.” He smirked. I nodded, a smile pulling at the corners of my mouth. I dropped his hand to pull the sweat-shirt over my head. I raked my fingers through my hair, flipping it carelessly out of my face. He had me jump on his back as we walked over to the side lines. Jackson was up to bat for when they started filming. I sighed and put my head down on Taylor’s shoulder. Jackson was wearing the shirt from yesterday and a pair of tight black pants and a baseball hat over his messy blond hair.
“Jay’s waving at you.” Taylor commented. I looked up surprised and sure enough he was waving.
“No-I think he’s waving at you. He’s mad at me for something.” I said.
“No-I saw him earlier, remember?” He said. Jackson’s beautiful smile was fading.
“Oh-right.” I whispered as I waved back to him and smiled. Maybe Kristen was right. Maybe he was just in a bad mood yesterday. He grinned just as Kevin stepped in between us. I slowly got off Taylor’s back. He made sure I was securely on the ground before taking my hand as I stood next to him.
“And action!” Kevin called. I winced at the sudden loud noise, but shrugged it off. He stepped out of my way as Jackson stepped up to the plate and he flipped the bat easily, barely touching the head of the bat before lightly flipping it back to grab the handle. He waved the bat in a circle and looked at Ashley as he got into the hitting position. It was then that I realized he was facing us, batting left handed. I smiled to myself as he swung and my mind went completely blank-all of a sudden I couldn’t even remember my own name as I watched him in all of his beautiful perfection.
I tugged on Taylor’s hand and he looked at me. I pointed to me and then to him and made a walking motion, telling him I wanted to go for a walk. He nodded and I let him lead me into the woods. We were silent for a moment as I clutched Taylor’s hand so I wouldn’t fall. He didn’t get upset with me as I constantly tripped or complained that I had his hand in a death grip. Finally I looked at him and sighed.
“What?” He asked. I shook my head as I thought about what I was going to say.
“Ok-this is going to sound incredibly paranoid and stupid and for that I’m sorry.” I started. He laughed.
“Don’t worry-I won’t hold it against you.” He said, smiling warmly. I took a deep breath.
“Did anyone say anything about me yesterday?” I asked quietly.
“Well-I asked where you were and Ashley said you stayed home.” He said, not sure if it was what I was looking for.
“No one asked Jackson why he was ignoring me yesterday morning?” I asked. He shook his head.
“Not that I know of. And when we got home he went straight to his room.” He said. “Although I asked what was with everyone and Kristen told me what happened.” He said-sounding like he wanted to ask something.
“What?” I prompted.
“Well, Kristen told me Kevin kept calling you...Monica.” He said, unsure if the name would bother me. I flinched like he had slapped me.
“Yeah, um...can you keep a secret for now?” I asked. “Just until I’m ready to tell everyone?” He nodded his head enthusiastically.
I could tell the sky around me was getting lighter and I could hear voices approaching-just two of them. I didn’t raise my head-I was so close to sleep. They passed me and continued to the field.
“Hey, guys.” Kevin said to them. “Hey-there’s someone I want you to meet.” He said happily. “Monica!” He called. I froze-pretending to be asleep. He seemed to realize his mistake because he didn’t call me after that. “Never mind.” I heard him whisper. I bit my lip and forced back my tears. Now would not be a good time to start thinking about my family.
I just about had myself under control when I heard a whole group of people coming towards me. I smiled into the quilt as I heard Jackson’s voice. I knew I shouldn’t be getting so attached to him. The chances were extremely good that he wouldn’t return the feelings-no boy ever has. The guys back home were all about my twin sister-Monica. The only guy who ever acknowledged me as a real person-not just Monica’s sister, was Justin Michaels. And now he only thought of me like a little sister. He was my boxing buddy-he made a good target.
The group had reached me and someone dropped something on me. Kellan’s coat.
“Thanks.” I mumbled sarcastically. I then felt four more coats drop onto my back. I groaned in protest, but didn’t move.
“How’d you sleep?” Rob asked. I lifted my head so he could hear me.
“I’ll let you know once I’ve gotten some sleep.” I said.
“What do you mean?” Kellan asked, squatting next to me.
“I only got an hour and a half of sleep this morning.” I explained.
“I bet I could help with that.” He winked. I rolled me eyes and pushed his knee so he fell over backwards.
“You love me.” He laughed, standing up and brushing himself off.
“Mon-“ Kevin started to call again. I clenched my fists and shot him a death glare. “Maggie!” He corrected himself. I blew out a resigned sigh and started to get to my feet. Kellan picked me up, lifting me by my elbows and set me on my feet.
“Thanks.” I mumbled. I didn’t look at any of them as I started across the field. Ashley, Nikki and Kristen caught up to me.
“Are you alright, hon?” Ashley asked. I nodded before looking at them and shaking my head miserably.
“What’s the matter?” Nikki asked worriedly.
“Just-“ I started, but decided now wasn’t the time or the place. “My name’s Maggie.” I mumbled, knowing they wouldn’t understand.
“Alright.” Ashley said uncertainly. We reached Kevin and he looked at me apologetically. I tried to smile, but it came out as more of a grimace.
“Hey, Peter, Liz.” Ash, Nikki, and Kristen greeted.
“Hello, girls.” The man name Peter greeted. The woman just smiled.
“Peter, Liz-this is my God daughter, Maggie.” He introduced, saying my name clearly, making up for the two times earlier. I smiled politely at them as I shook their hands.
“Kevin has told us so much about you.” Liz said, smiling warmly.
“Oh gosh.” I joked.
“All good things, of course.” Peter said. I smiled thankfully. The guys had come closer and I realized Taylor wasn’t with them.
“He’s sleeping in.” Ashley said quietly in my ear, answering my unasked question. I smiled at her. I looked around and saw that they were all in baseball-ish attire. My eyes landed on Jackson and I had to force myself to remember how to breathe. His white shirt with blue sleeves was tight across his well defined muscular chest, accenting his sculpted torso and broad shoulders perfectly. I quickly dropped my gaze to my flip flops.
“Nice shoes.” Kellan commented. I looked up just in time to see Nikki back hand him in the stomach and I realized he was talking to me. I laughed.
“It was five thirty when I got dressed. You’re lucky I’m out of pajamas, let alone almost decent enough.” I grumbled.
“No-you’re lucky you’re out of pajamas.” He corrected. I tilted my head, confused. He just shook his head. “It’s a good thing you’re hot.” He said before starting to walk away with everyone else. I stood stock still. Me? Hot? He’s got to be kidding. I’ve never been called hot in my life. I blinked as Rob grabbed my hand and pulled me along.
“Are you ok?” He asked, but I was still too dumbfounded to speak. “Is she ok?” He asked someone else.
“I dunno.” I vaguely heard Kellan’s voice. “Give her a kiss, Prince charming-snap her out of it.” He laughed. That snapped me out of it.
“Nope-I’m good.” I said quickly. Kristen chuckled.
“I think she’s saying she doesn’t want you kissing her, Rob.” She said, nudging his arm. I sighed-there was no way to get out of this nicely. Rob slung his arm around my shoulders coolly.
“We’re just takin’ the mick.” He said before kissing the top of my head.
“I know.” I sighed and then stopped talking. Jackson was texting again, but not talking.
There was another half hour wait as the crew finished getting set up.
“Alright-we have a new cell phone person.” Kevin announced to the actors just before they were about to start. I had no idea what he was talking about. “Moni-“ He started. I bit my lip hard. “Sorry-Maggie.” He corrected, glancing at me. I kept my eyes firmly on the ground. “You know the deal-turn them off, in the bucket they go-you can have them back after we’re done.” He said in a monotone voice, handing me a metal pail. I held it by the handle as everyone took out their cell phones, shut them off and dropped them into the bucket I was holding. Everyone but Jackson smiled at me. He didn’t even look at me. I frowned, but didn’t let it get to me. I figured he was just tired. I’d be rude, too, if I had to actually do work at such an un-Godly hour. Instead I just have to sit around holding the Bucket-O’-Cell phones.
Kevin instructed them on the first shot they were doing and came over to stand next to me. We were silent for a minute.
“I’m sorry, Maggie.” He said quietly. I just nodded. “It’s just...I’m so used to yelling at your sister.” He said quietly. “You were always the good one. It’s just instinct to yell her name instead of yours.” He said softly. I turned to face him.
“I was the good one?” I asked, a little surprised. That hadn’t been the way I remembered things. I was always the one getting yelled at while Monica was perfect.
“Yeah-you’re sister was always getting into something or another.” He said. “Just between you and me-you were my favorite of my favorites.” He said. I tried to figure out what he said, but I just confused myself even more.
“Say again.” I said. He chuckled.
“Out of my favorites, both you and your sister included, you were my most favorite.” He said again. That made more sense.
“Oh-alright.” I paused while he said more instructions. He called action. “Can you just make a conscious effort to call me Maggie, not Monica?” I requested.
“I’ll do my best, kiddo.” He nodded. ‘That’s all I ask for.’ I thought.
I watched the scene playing in front of me. Ashley was on a pitcher’s mound while Rob and Kellan were in the outfield and Nikki was up to bat. She swung and ran around the bases, well, with a wire attached to her back as Rob took off for the patch of trees at the back of the field. I was watching in amusement as Nikki slid into home plate. There was a pause and then I could hear Kristen say ‘You’re out.’ From across the field I faintly heard Kellan call ‘Come on, babe-it’s just a game.’ I smiled as Peter was up to bat. He swung hard, his scarf swinging from the force. He took off running, same as Nikki. Kellan and Rob ran across the field towards each other and jumped at the same time, pretending to crash into each other. I winced as they both fell to the ground.
“Cut!” Kevin called. Everyone stopped and looked at Kevin. He stepped away from me. “Can we do that again? This time, try jumping as high as you can.” He said. Rob and Kellan ran back to their original marks. “And...action!” Kevin called. They looked at an imaginary spot in the sky and started running. They both jumped at the same time and actually crashed into each other. I gasped and quickly covered my mouth, hoping I didn’t ruin the shot. I could hear Rob and Kellan laughing as they stood up.
“Everyone ok?” Kevin asked. Kellan stuck his hand up in the air. “Great.” He turned to me. “Stay here, Mags.” He said. I nodded as he jogged over. “Let’s do that again, but this time, let’s have one person go at a time, ok?” He asked and they laughed. I felt my phone in my pocket vibrate and I was grateful that I usually keep the ringer off. I looked at the caller ID and saw it was Justin calling. I debated ignoring it, but decided I didn’t want to. So, not to bother anyone, I walked a little ways away into the forest behind me. I found a broken tree trunk and sat down, facing the direction I had come in.
“Hey.” I answered.
“Hey. How are you?” He asked cautiously.
“Getting better.” I answered, thinking about Jackson.
“That’s good-I miss my boxing partner.” He said. I smiled slightly.
“I miss mine, too.” I assured him.
“So when do I get to come visit you?” He asked.
“Whenever you want. I’ll be here for a while.” I said.
“Alright. Well, my next break is in about four weeks- a few days after your birthday.” He said.
“So you’ll be my birthday present?” I asked before I could stop myself.
“If that’s what you want.” He said and I could hear the smile in his voice-I was acting like a girl finally.
“It is. And a rematch...match.” I said. He chuckled. So much for being a girl.
“Alright-it’s a deal.” I beamed.
“I can’t wait.” I said honestly. “Hey, Jut-I have to go. Can I call you later?”
“Of course.” We hung up and I found my way out, only tripping a few times. I entered the clearing in time to see Jackson messing around with the bat in his hand. I watched him spin it around his hand, mesmerized by his incredibly graceful movements. He glanced at me and dropped the bat. I quickly lowered my gaze, thoroughly flustered. He had looked mad when he looked at me just then, like he wished I wasn’t around. I heard him sigh as he retrieved the bat angrily.
“Jackson-what was that you were doing?” Kevin asked.
“Oh-just messing around.” He said off-handedly.
“Can you do it again?” Kevin asked. He nodded.
“Sure.”
“Paul.” Kevin said, waving to one of the camera guys and pointing to Jackson. “I think you should be watching Ashley, like you’re trying to intimidate her with how relaxed Jasper is.” Kevin said to Jay.
“Sure.” Jackson said again, avoiding looking at me as he flipped the bat. I sighed. Something was definitely wrong. I watched him step up to the plate and my heart beat started racing. He looked so perfect, standing there. Kevin let the scene play out a few minutes longer before it started to rain heavily.
“Cut!” He called. The crew rushed to cover up the cameras as the cast hurried to stand under the tent where I was. I held the Bucket O’ Cell Phones out and one by one everyone grabbed theirs, Jackson had Ashley get his for him.
“Where did you go before?” Nikki asked me. I looked up.
“What?” I asked, not remembering.
“Before-you went into the woods.” She hinted. Then it clicked-Justin.
“Oh-I had a phone call from a...friend.” I said.
“A boyfriend?” Ashley teased. I let out a sharp laugh.
“Not likely.” I said dryly. Been there-done that.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kellan asked. I just shook my head. I glanced at Jackson quickly to see him staring at me intently.
“Excuse me.” I said before walking out of the tent, going exactly five feet and walking directly into Cam, knocking him down into the mud and falling on top of him. “Shit!” I said loudly. “Cam-I’m so sorry.” I rushed, standing up and offering him my hand. I felt my face burning. He chuckled and jumped right up.
“It’s all good. Are you alright?” He asked. I nodded, wiping below my eyes, just in case. “You sure?” He asked, trying to peer into my eyes. I nodded.
“I got you all mud.” I sighed. He laughed and moved me to the side, out of the way.
“Mud is supposed to be good for your skin. I’m fine, Maggie.” He assured me. “Are you?” He asked. I threw my arms around his firm waist, pressing my face into his chest. He hesitated only a moment before wrapping his arms tightly around me. It only took me a few minutes to recover before I pulled away. He looked at me questioningly.
“I just needed a hug.” I said, deciding it helped a great deal. He smiled.
“Any time.” I smiled back before side stepping him and going to find Kevin. I had gone about twenty feet when someone caught my arm. I turned to see Ashley, Kristen and Nikki.
“What’s going on?” Nikki asked. I shrugged casually.
“Nothing-just going to find Kevin.” I said, wiping rain off my face. I was now completely soaked.
“That’s not what we meant.” Ash said. I frowned.
“I’m just over tired.” I said. “I get...emotional when I’m sleep deprived.”
“Ok-who’s Monica?” Kristen asked. I bit my lip so hard I made it bleed.
“That’s a story for a different day. Please don’t make me say it now.” I pleaded. They seemed taken aback with my begging.
“Alright.” Nikki nodded.
“I do have a question.” I said quietly.
“Sure.” Kristen said, a friendly smile in her voice.
“What’s up with Jackson? Did I piss him off?” I asked nervously-hoping there was a good reason for the silent treatment I was getting from him.
“Do you know-I’ve never seen him act like that to one person?” Ashley said. My heart sank-so I had done something.
“When we all first got here-he was really quiet, shy, but then he kind of opened up. I mean-he was fine with you yesterday, right?” Nikki commented. I nodded miserably.
“I’m sure he’s just in a bad mood.” Kristen tried to assure me. I shrugged, trying to act fine. Kevin was headed towards us, but I wasn’t in the mood for talking. The guys had all come out of the tent and were heading towards us as well. I refrained from groaning.
“Can you give these to Kevin for me?” I asked, digging my car keys out of my pocket and holding them out. “I’m going for a walk.” I said. Kristen nodded apologetically, taking them from me. I half smiled and started walking away from everyone.
“Maggie!” Rob called as I passed them, but I ignored him.
“Mon-!” I heard Kevin’s voice over the pounding rain. I started walking faster, sloshing muddy water up my pant legs. My flip flops were getting caught in the mud so I stopped to take them off, very aware of everyone watching.
I shoved my ear buds in my ears and started my iPod, turning up the music as loud as I could stand it. I had reached my car and I tossed my flip flops on the floor of the back seat. I slammed the door shut and kept walking bare foot.
I debated calling Justin but decided that wouldn’t be a good idea. He had told me when he broke up with me that when I decided to act like a girl to give him a call. Well-this was definitely a girl thing-but I’m pretty sure not what he meant. I could go talk to Taylor, but it was still kind of early-around ten thirty or so, and plus he didn’t need to hear about my stupid problems.
So I walked around the almost empty streets, just thinking. I shouldn’t even be upset that he’s not speaking to me. I mean-I barely know him. I shouldn’t like him as much as I do. I decided I’d give him a few days to get over what ever I did. If, by then, he still wasn’t speaking to me then I’d be better off. As hard as I tried to convince myself of that , the fact of the matter was-it was never going to be true.
Now I just had to figure out what to do with Kevin. If he called me Monica one more freaking time I was going to snap.
I had finally calmed down to the point where I could go back to Kevin’s. I traipsed back to the house, tripping every once in a while.
My car was in the drive way along with a large jeep I recognized as Kellan’s character, Emmett’s car. I frowned. I tripped up the steps and into the house. I set my iPod and phone on the front hall table and started for the stairs, seeing everyone but Jackson and Taylor sitting around, talking. I waved at them as I went up the stairs, pulling off my wet clothes as I went. I stumbled into the bathroom and turned on the water as hot as I could take it before climbing in. I scrubbed my skin until it was raw, trying to get rid of the mud and the cold.
“Out, damned spot, out.” I mumbled to myself as I scrubbed. I wrapped my hair up in a towel and wrapped another one tight around my body. I went into my room and got dressed in a pair of dark blue basketball shorts and a tank top and went downstairs.
“You ok, kid?” Kevin asked as I sat on the arm of the couch next to Kellan.
“Yeah, sorry, I just needed to think.” I said. He nodded. Kellan pulled me into his lap, holding me to his body and lacing his fingers loosely around my waist.
“Your skin is all red.” He commented, resting his mouth against my bare shoulder.
“Yeah, from the water.” I said, leaning my head back against his shoulder.
“So-what shot are we doing tonight?” Kristen asked. So that meant we weren’t going out to dinner.
“I think we’ll do the scene in the ballet studio-it’s going to take some time to get it right.” Kevin said. “Maybe a few nights in a row, and then we’ll take a break from the night shots.” He said, nodding to himself. “Tomorrow-if the rain lets up, we’ll finish the baseball scene.”
“Alright.” Everyone said, agreeing. Kellan nudged me.
“Are you coming tonight?” He asked. I shook my head.
“I need more sleep so I can be normal tomorrow instead of the emo child I was today.” He chuckled and Rob looked confused.
“What’s an emo child?” He asked. I smiled.
“It’s someone who acts all...emotionally unstable and child like.” I explained as best I could.
“Oh.” He said.
“So you’ll be on set tomorrow?” Ashley asked. I nodded.
“Unless you guys don’t want me there.” I said. Kellan’s strong arms tightened around me.
“Of course we do.” He said defensively. “All of us.” He added.
“Then I’ll be there.” I said, feeling grateful for them. Cam grinned. I noticed he had changed clothes. I must have looked like I was going to apologize again because he winked.
“Seriously-I’m fine.” He said. Everyone just looked at him, but I nodded in defeat.
We sat around for a few more minutes before everyone stood up, Kellan still holding onto me. I tried to step away, but he wasn’t budging.
“You’re going to be the death of me.” I grumbled. He chuckled and let me go, kissing my cheek and then he disappeared out the door, followed by Kevin. Both Rob and Cam kissed my cheeks at the same time before following Kevin. I gave each of the girls a hug as they, too, left.
I sat in the empty house for a while, just flipping through the channels on the large TV. Finally I got bored enough that I called Justin back.
Surprisingly we talked for four hours. Then he had to go and I was bored again so I cleaned the entire house and moved my room around. I made a salad with grilled chicken for dinner and decided it was too early for bed so I moved the living room around. By the time I was done with that it was nine-I could go to sleep.
I woke myself up the next morning to see I had slept twelve hours straight-it was now nine in the AM. I wondered why Kevin didn’t wake me up when he left. I got in the shower, did my stuff and got dressed in a denim skirt that was frayed at the bottom, black leggings and a black tank top with tiny white stars on it. I laced up my cons, brushed my teeth, straightened my hair and went to walk out the back door. On the table was a laminated card with my picture and the Twilight Set Pass in bold with my name in smaller print under it. I grinned and put the lanyard it was attached to around my neck. Under that was a note in Kevin’s chicken scratch:
Come to the field
I grinned and went out to my car. I started it, cranked the heat and drove to the field, parking next to Nikki’s car. I climbed out and headed for the tent from yesterday. Today Taylor was inside, short hair instead of the wig. I smiled when I saw him and he stood up to hug me.
“I missed you yesterday.” He said quietly because they were filming. I nodded sheepishly.
“Just a bad day.” I whispered. He nodded and left it at that. “Let’s go outside-we can see better.” I said, taking his hand and pulling him towards the flap of the tent. He smiled and snatched a sweat-shirt off one of the chairs.
“Kevin brought it for you-he said you’d forget one.” He smirked. I nodded, a smile pulling at the corners of my mouth. I dropped his hand to pull the sweat-shirt over my head. I raked my fingers through my hair, flipping it carelessly out of my face. He had me jump on his back as we walked over to the side lines. Jackson was up to bat for when they started filming. I sighed and put my head down on Taylor’s shoulder. Jackson was wearing the shirt from yesterday and a pair of tight black pants and a baseball hat over his messy blond hair.
“Jay’s waving at you.” Taylor commented. I looked up surprised and sure enough he was waving.
“No-I think he’s waving at you. He’s mad at me for something.” I said.
“No-I saw him earlier, remember?” He said. Jackson’s beautiful smile was fading.
“Oh-right.” I whispered as I waved back to him and smiled. Maybe Kristen was right. Maybe he was just in a bad mood yesterday. He grinned just as Kevin stepped in between us. I slowly got off Taylor’s back. He made sure I was securely on the ground before taking my hand as I stood next to him.
“And action!” Kevin called. I winced at the sudden loud noise, but shrugged it off. He stepped out of my way as Jackson stepped up to the plate and he flipped the bat easily, barely touching the head of the bat before lightly flipping it back to grab the handle. He waved the bat in a circle and looked at Ashley as he got into the hitting position. It was then that I realized he was facing us, batting left handed. I smiled to myself as he swung and my mind went completely blank-all of a sudden I couldn’t even remember my own name as I watched him in all of his beautiful perfection.
I tugged on Taylor’s hand and he looked at me. I pointed to me and then to him and made a walking motion, telling him I wanted to go for a walk. He nodded and I let him lead me into the woods. We were silent for a moment as I clutched Taylor’s hand so I wouldn’t fall. He didn’t get upset with me as I constantly tripped or complained that I had his hand in a death grip. Finally I looked at him and sighed.
“What?” He asked. I shook my head as I thought about what I was going to say.
“Ok-this is going to sound incredibly paranoid and stupid and for that I’m sorry.” I started. He laughed.
“Don’t worry-I won’t hold it against you.” He said, smiling warmly. I took a deep breath.
“Did anyone say anything about me yesterday?” I asked quietly.
“Well-I asked where you were and Ashley said you stayed home.” He said, not sure if it was what I was looking for.
“No one asked Jackson why he was ignoring me yesterday morning?” I asked. He shook his head.
“Not that I know of. And when we got home he went straight to his room.” He said. “Although I asked what was with everyone and Kristen told me what happened.” He said-sounding like he wanted to ask something.
“What?” I prompted.
“Well, Kristen told me Kevin kept calling you...Monica.” He said, unsure if the name would bother me. I flinched like he had slapped me.
“Yeah, um...can you keep a secret for now?” I asked. “Just until I’m ready to tell everyone?” He nodded his head enthusiastically.