I Want to Be the Prettiest Wreck You've Ever Seen
Chapter Four: Chicken Riggies and Bedtime Stories
Taylor and I emerged from the trees and headed for the tent. I was making sure all the tears were gone just as Jackson looked up to me. He smiled until he saw my red eyes. He jogged over to us and stopped in front of me.
“Are you ok?” He asked worriedly. “What happened?” He asked, looking between Taylor and me.
“I just got some dust in my eyes from walking into a tree.” I lied. Hey-if I’m gonna lie why not make it believable?
“Is your head ok? Didn’t hurt the tree, did you?” He asked, his hand on top of my head turning it gently. I started to answer, but caught what he said and looked up at his face to see him smirking.
“No, jerk, I didn’t hurt the tree.” I managed to say.
“Ok, good.” He said, slinging an arm around my shoulders as Taylor kept a tight grip on my hand, looking at me every so often. I felt a little better that at least someone knew. Jay led me over to the group where Kristen smiled at me as she eyed Jackson’s arm.
“So what did you do yesterday after we left?” Kellan asked me. I shrugged.
“Flipped through a thousand channels twice, cleaned, moved my room around, moved the living room around...” I listed.
“Wait-the living room?” Rob asked. I nodded. “The one with all that heavy furniture?” I nodded again. “Completely mental.” He muttered.
“Why didn’t you call for help?” Taylor asked, offended. I chuckled. They were making a bigger deal out of this than need be.
“One: because you were all working, bee: the stuff wasn’t that heavy and three-it’s therapeutic.” I said. Ashley and Nikki laughed.
“Lemme see your phone.” Ashley said to me, holding her hand out. It took my brain a few seconds to catch up with that as Jackson’s hand started playing with my hair. I slowly dug it out of my left pocket with my right hand and gave it to her.
“Cute skirt.” Kellan winked. I smirked.
“Thanks.” I replied.
“Know what it would look even better on?” He asked and I laughed.
“If you say your floor I’ll never speak to you again.” I said, still smiling.
“Well, just kill my hopes, then.” He muttered. Rob pushed him jokingly as Ashley gave my phone to Nikki who started typing quickly.
“You just got a text message from someone named Jut.” Nikki said, confused.
“Oh-yeah-you can just ignore it. It’s probably not important.” I said casually. It was hard to care too much about Justin when Jackson had his arm around me like he did.
“Who’s Jut?” He whispered, his lips brushing my ear. I swallowed a few times.
“Justin’s an old friend.” I said quietly, my voice wouldn’t go any louder. The phone got passed to Rob, then Kellan, then Cam, then Kristen, then Taylor and finally to Jackson. I watched as he entered his number into my phone and shut it before sticking it in my pocket for me. I struggled to keep my face casual, but my pulse was twice as fast as it should have been for just standing still.
The next day Jackson was back to texting, but not speaking to me.
The day after that-he was a total sweet heart, holding doors open for me and he even brought me coffee when he saw I was falling asleep in the cafeteria.
The day after that he was back to texting-so he wasn’t speaking to me. And they had been doing the night shots all week so we couldn’t even go out to dinner.
After a week of this going on-I saw the pattern. On the days he was texting-Jackson was avoiding me at all costs. On the days he wasn’t texting-he was the friendliest person ever.
The guy of my dreams was bipolar.
Alright-I can handle that. I knew the pattern so I knew what days to avoid him on. Although, my Kevin problem wasn’t so easily solved.
He was still calling me Monica. I was going to start wearing name tags or something.
At the beginning of my second week I was sitting at one of the tables in the cafeteria of the set. My head was down on the table and I was focusing completely on the cool surface touching my skin. Not only was this a texting day-but it was also my parent’s anniversary.
I doubted my ability to make it through the day. I barely made it out of bed! I was still in pajama pants, flip flops and a tank top with a huge hoodie. My hair had been thrown up in a messy bun and I was wearing my glasses again.
Taylor sat next to me as a few others sat down as well. I didn’t bother looking up to see who it was. Taylor saw my blank expression and waved his hand in front of my face. The motion should have made me blink but I was too focused on the table to really be paying attention to what I was seeing.
“Maybe she’s catatonic?” He guessed to the others. I sighed as I slowly focused on my surroundings. Now that I had distractions-I could afford to think. I sat up slowly and shook my head in response to his statement.
“I’m fine.” I mumbled. Kellan was seated next to me as Rob was next to him and Ashley was between Taylor and Rob.
“Is this because of Jackson?” Ashley asked quietly. I was pretty sure that by now everyone had at least a feeling I liked him. I shook my head.
“Not completely.” I said, forcing my voice to be heard. “Yeah-it’d be easier if he were speaking to me today, but it isn’t him.” I said, picking at the chipping nail polish of my thumb nail.
“So what is it?” Kellan asked. I shook my head.
“Not now please.” I said quietly. “Not when it’s so crowded here.” They nodded. We were quiet for a minute and my thoughts weren’t helping. “Someone say something so I can focus on it.” I said.
“Chicken Riggies!” Kellan said randomly. He succeeded in not only distracting me, but he also made me laugh. I chuckled and looked at him.
“What about them?” I asked.
“You need something to focus on-you could focus on making them for us tonight.” He said excitedly. I nodded, liking the sound of his idea.
“Yeah-ok.” I agreed. “And you’ll come around...what? 7?” I asked.
“Sure!” Kellan grinned.
“Alright-then I’ll go in a little while to get the stuff.” I said, extremely grateful to Kellan.
“Sounds good.”
“Any food allergies I should know about? Anyone not like mushrooms?” I asked.
“I think you’re all set, love.” Rob smiled. “Just make them the way you normally would.” I smiled.
“Alright, then.” I said. I listened to them talk for a little while longer as Kellan played with my hair, making me sleepy.
“You ok, babe?” Kellan whispered as I leaned into him, my back against his firm chest.
“Mhm.” I said comfortably, letting my mind go blank. “You’re just making me sleepy, relaxed.” I said. He chuckled.
“Is that good?” He asked. I was vaguely aware that the others were listening, but I was too far gone to care.
“Very-I don’t wanna think.” I said numbly.
“Well, then-I’m glad I could help.” He said softly.
“Mmm.” I said. I heard Rob laugh.
We sat there for a little while longer before I decided I should go shopping for the stuff I would need. I lifted my head off the table, waking myself up.
“Alright-I should get going.” I said, rubbing my eyes. “Can you guys let Kevin know I’m taking off?” I asked.
“Sure.” Taylor nodded.
“Thanks.” I stood up and promptly lost my balance as the blood rushed to my head. Taylor and Kellan grabbed my wrists, catching me. I felt my face turn bright red. Rob looked at me, concerned as Kellan and Taylor continued to hold me up.
“I’m fine-just light headed.” I assured him. I checked my balance before I tugged on my wrists so they would let go. I turned around and saw Jackson watching me from the doorway to the rest of the building. I bit my lip but walked out the door that led my directly outside. I headed for the main gate and headed for my car. I began focusing on what I was touching so I wouldn’t have to think about my parents. I grabbed my keys out of my shoulder bag. Touch keys. Touch handle. Touch seat. Touch steering wheel. Touch seat belt. Touch ignition. Touch iPod. Tough heater. Touch gear shift. Touch steering wheel. Touch. Touch. Touch. Touch.
I focused like that until I reached the store and had to focus on what I was buying. I got everything I needed; I didn’t even need a list anymore I had made it so much I knew the ingredients by heart. I grabbed a $50 iTunes card and headed for the check out. I focused on touching as I put everything on the conveyor belt and headed back out the car.
Touch keys. Touch trunk. Touch bag. Touch bag. Touch bag. Touch trunk. Touch cart. Don’t trip. Touch handle. I repeated the process driving home. I pulled into the garage and shut off the Impala. I got the bags into the house and busied myself around the kitchen, easily focusing on not cutting off a finger.
I had everything almost all ready at six thirty when Kevin rushed in. I smiled pleasantly at him. He looked at me before pulling me into a big hug, kissing the top of my head.
“You doing ok, kid?” He asked, holding me at arms length to look at me.
“As long as I don’t let myself think.” I mumbled. He smiled sadly and gave me a chuck under my chin.
“You’re a good kid.” He said distractedly. I felt my face get warm.
“Hey-are you staying for dinner?” I asked. “I’m making riggies.” I said, motioning to the stove.
“Ah-I have a date tonight.” He said apologetically. “But it will be more fun for you guys if I’m not there.” He said, giving a little laugh.
“Have fun.” I said quietly.
“Save me some riggies-I’ll have them tomorrow.” He said, heading for the stairs.
“Kay.” I said dejectedly. He left about ten minutes after that, stealing a mushroom out of the pan.
“Mmmm-delicious.” He said. He kissed the side of my head. “I told everyone to just walk right in.” He said, smiling. I nodded.
“Have fun.” I said, really meaning it. He grinned before skipping out the back door.
After a few minutes I decided it was way too quiet so I grabbed my iPod and put my ear buds in, turning it on. Dear Maria by the All Time Low came on. I started singing, but I could still hear my self so I turned up the volume.
At exactly seven, everything was done. I turned off the heat under the large Dutch oven and went to get the largest bowl to put it in. Unfortunately the bowl was way over my head. I stood on my tip-toes and stretched for it, hoping to miraculously grow-but it wasn’t happening. I sighed and turned to get a chair, walking directly into Rob. I let out a scream as his arms folded around me, holding me close to him as he shook with silent laughter. I got my breathing under control and pushed him in the chest.
“Jerk.” I mumbled, yanking out my ear buds.
“Sorry.” He whispered.
“How long have you been here?” I asked.
“Just a few minutes. We were listening to you sing. When you stopped I came to see if you were ok.” He smiled. I sighed. “You have a very good voice.” He complimented. I felt my face flush.
“Thanks.” I mumbled.
“Now-what were you reaching for?” He asked. I pointed to a large brown bowl. It was almost vat-like.
“I need that bowl-it’s the only one big enough but I need a chair to get it.” I said, side stepping him.
“Don’t be absurd.” He smirked. “Go say hi to everyone. I’ll get it for you.” I kissed his cheek and went into the living room where everyone but Jackson sat. I felt my face fall momentarily as I realized he wouldn’t be coming at all. I waved to everyone.
“Hey, guys.” I said. Taylor beamed, Cam waved, Nikki, Ashley and Kristen all smiled and Kellan grinned at me.
“I didn’t know we were getting dinner and a show.” He said, referring to my singing. I rolled my eyes.
“I hope you committed the sound to memory, sweetheart, because that’s the last time you’re ever going to hear it.” I said. He grinned.
“That’s what you think.” He smirked. I just shook my head and went back into the kitchen where Rob had set the bowl on the counter. “Thank you.” I smiled at him. He nodded.
“Now what?” He asked. I looked at him as I got the Dutch oven off the stove.
“What do you mean?” I asked as I attempted to hold the heavy pan while guiding the pasta into the bowl with the spoon in the other.
“What else can I do to help?” He asked, taking the pan from me. I laughed.
“Silly-you’re not here to do work.” I said. I finished with that and stuck the large plastic spoon into it. I took the Dutch oven and quickly washed it so I wouldn’t have to later. “Thanks for the help, now go relax it will be ready in a second.” I said, pushing him towards the doorway. He swiftly hugged me and kissed the top of my head.
“It smells absolutely wonderful.” He whispered before going into the living room. I smiled and quickly did a mental head count and got out the right amount of plates. I got out forks, napkins and glasses. I put all of it on the dining room table, which sat in the large room off of the kitchen. I carried the large bowl into the dining room and set it in the middle of the table. I walked back into the living room and sat on the arm of the couch next to Taylor.
“What do you guys want to drink?” I asked. Kellan looked at me from in front of the built in book case.
“Is it ready?” He asked excitedly. I nodded and he came over to stand in front of me. I looked at him cautiously and sighed as he picked me up over his shoulder. He carried me into the dining room and set me down.
“Wouldn’t want you to trip.” He smirked. “Don’t worry-we can get our own drinks.” He said, patting the top of my head. I smiled as everyone else came into the room.
“Mmmmm-Maggie-it smells so good!” Ashley said. I smiled proudly.
“Well-help yourself.” I said, standing back, letting them go first.
“Are we eating in here?” Taylor asked. I shrugged.
“Where-ever, in here, the living room-it’s up to you guys.” I said casually.
“I vote the living room.” Kellan voted loudly.
“Agreed.” Cam said. Everyone got their plates and drinks and we went into the living room to eat.
It was silent for a few minutes while everyone ate. I waited nervously for their reactions.
“Oh my God. This is amazing!” Ashley said. I smiled as everyone else agreed just as enthusiastically.
“You really did a good job.” Cam complimented. I smiled.
“I’m glad you all like it.” I said, forking my first bite into my mouth. Everyone relaxed into their own conversations and Taylor looked at me since he was sitting next to me.
“How you doing?” He asked quietly. Ever since I told him my secret-the reason I was here with Kevin-Taylor was always making sure I was alright.
“I’m ok. Today was just hard.” I whispered. “Today was their anniversary.” I explained, my voice barely above a whisper. He squeezed my hand.
“I’m so sorry.” He said softly. I shrugged, not wanting to think about it.
“Hey, pssssst-Rob!” Kellan fake-whispered, meaning for everyone to hear him.
“What?” Rob fake whispered back. I shook my head.
“So, Maggie’s a good cook-and she’s hot. I’d say we’re kinda lucky.” Kellan fake whispered.
“Where did you two learn to whisper? In a helicopter?” I asked rhetorically, breaking up their conversation. Everyone just laughed.
The talking and laughter died down and I began to feel uneasy.
“Hey, Maggie?” Ashley started, not looking at me. Uh-oh.
“Yeah?” I replied uncertainly.
“We have a question-but don’t feel obligated to answer-it’s totally up to you.” She rushed. I blew out a sigh.
“Go ahead.” I said quietly-already knowing the question.
“Who’s Monica?” She asked softly. I took a deep breath.
“Monica is my...late twin sister.” I said slowly, struggling with the words. They sounded foreign. Taylor laced his warm fingers with mine comfortably.
“By late you mean...” Cam trailed off.
“Dead.” I said firmly. There! I said it! Everyone winced at the harshness.
“How?” Nikki asked.
“Guys-“ Taylor started, but I squeezed his hand, stopping him.
“In a car crash with my parents about a month and a half ago.” I said, blinking furiously.
“Oh my gosh, honey I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. I shouldn’t have brought it up.” Ashley rushed.
“It’s ok. I would have told you sooner or later.” I mumbled. “Today was just exceptionally difficult because it was my parents’ 25th anniversary.” I said, my voice breaking. I set my plate down and covered my eyes for a minute, trying to get control.
“How’d it happen?” Kellan asked. I looked up to him just as Nikki back handed him in the stomach. “Ow.” He muttered. “You don’t have to answer that.” He sighed.
“A mack truck-18 wheeler ran into the driver’s side. My mother and Monica were killed instantly-my dad died a few hours later in the hospital.” I said, my voice barely audible. I gave a loud sniff and Taylor pulled me against his chest. I felt something pointy hit my shoulder.
“Ow.” I mumbled.
“I thought you could use one.” I heard Kellan say. I looked and saw the box of tissues. Nikki hit him again. “Ow! What? I’m just trying to be helpful.” He whined. I chuckled. “See! I made her laugh.”
“Thanks, Kellan.” I said, wiping my eyes and still chuckling, I sat up. “Alright-now that I’ve killed the mood-can we move on please?” I requested.
“Sure thing.” Kristen said.
“How old are you, Maggie?” Kellan asked. I laughed at the randomness.
“Twenty.” I said. My 21st birthday was in two weeks.
“When’s your birthday?” Rob asked.
“Not telling.” I responded promptly.
“Why not?” Cam whined.
“Because I don’t want people making a big deal out of it.” I said.
“We won’t.” Kellan said. I raised an eyebrow at him. “Swear to God.” He said, holding up his right hand.
“No presents.” I warned them. Rob sighed.
“Why are girls always so picky?” He asked, looking at Cam. Cam just shrugged, smirking.
“Dunno, dude.” He said. Well, then-if I was being picky I just wouldn’t tell them.
“Hmph.” I said, before stabbing a noodle and sticking it in my mouth.
“Oh-what? Now you’re not going to tell us?” Rob asked. I shook my head.
“I don’t want to be picky.” I retorted. Everyone just laughed at me.
“Alright-fine-no presents.” Rob sighed. I bit my lip, still not wanting to tell them.
“Please?” Taylor asked sweetly, batting his eyelashes at me. I sighed.
“Fine. It’s in two weeks exactly.” I mumbled.
“Just after the holiday.” Kellan noted. “Hey-your birthday could be a national holiday! It’s close.” He said. Nikki threw a couch pillow at him.
“You’re such a dork.” She laughed.
“Actually-it was supposed to be on Thanksgiving.” I said quietly.
“Seriously?” Cam asked, surprised. I nodded. “Anyways-I won’t be any fun on my birthday this year.” I said.
“We’ll make you fun.” Nikki said brightly. “We’ll get you drunk.” I laughed.
“Alright-it’s a deal.” I said, not taking them seriously. They’d probably forget by then anyways.
We finished eating in good spirits and I went to go do clean up but Kellan had me by my wrists from behind.
“Guys-come on!” I whined.
“Taylor!” Rob called. Taylor walked into the kitchen with a bemused smile on his face as he watched me struggle pointlessly against Kellan’s iron grip. I could have made him let go-but to be honest-I was glad they were doing clean up. Kristen and Ashley split the left over riggies into two containers: one for them to take and one for here.
“Yeah?” Taylor replied casually.
“Keep her out of the kitchen.” Kellan said, handing my wrists to Taylor. I sighed as he took them, gently rubbing his thumbs over the smooth skin on the inside of my wrists.
“Come on.” He said, smiling.
“But-“ I protested, looking over my shoulder.
“They’ve got it. They probably won’t break anything, either.” He said jokingly.
“Well-if you do break anything-make sure you break it before you wash it. That’s what I do.” I said. They all laughed. “What? It’s less work that way.” I defended.
“So, you break dishes a lot?” Taylor asked as we sat on the couch with his arm around me.
“Only all the time.” I said, chuckling. “My hands shake a lot, so I drop them...aaaand they break.” I said and he chuckled. I settled into the crook of his shoulder, resting my head against the side of his firm chest. “You should have seen the dishes back at my old house.” I chuckled. “They were all mismatched because I kept breaking them. Oh, my parents got so mad at me.” I chuckled half heartedly.
“Why? It’s not like you did it on purpose, right?” He asked.
“Right. It’s just...complicated.” I sighed as Kristen, Nikki, Ashley and Cam came in to sit down.
“What’s complicated?” Nikki asked. I sighed. I knew by now that they wouldn’t give up-I had to tell them.
“My parents...” I blew out a sigh, trying to find a nice way to put it. “Well-they usually took Monica’s side over mine.” I said, looking down at my lap.
“Oh, honey, I’m sure that’s not true.” Ashley said. I scoffed.
“Not in a mean way-but it’s still true.” I said.
“How?” Kristen challenged.
“Moni and I would come home and we each had eight classes. I’d have seven grades above ninety and one that was in the eighties. It was usually math-I suck at math. And Moni would have about six in the nineties and failing the other two. I’d get a lecture about how I need to bring my grades up and stop being so lazy.” I said quietly. “While Monica got a pat on the back.” I started tracing the lines on Taylor’s hand. “My sister was always the perfect one.” I bit my lip as I felt the tears well up in my eyes.
“Kevin doesn’t think so.” Cam commented. “You should have heard the way he was talking about you.” He smiled. “He talked about you like you were his own daughter that became president or something.” I felt my face flush.
“Wait-if you’re twenty-technically you don’t have to be here, right?” Taylor asked. I chewed on my lower lip.
“Well, actually-I do.” I said quietly.
“Why? Aren’t you legal?” Kristen asked. I let out a short laugh.
“Yeah. The courts ordered me to stay with Kevin for a few months.” I said. I didn’t say the reason why-but I had a feeling they’d ask.
“Why?” Ashley spoke up. I smiled to myself.
“Sort of like a suicide watch thing.” I said. “Unnecessary in the truest sense of the word, but the judge was a friend of my dad and I made the mistake of saying that I should have been in the car, instead of Monica. So the judge was just watching out for me and such.” I said with a wave of my hand. Everyone was quiet. “I said un necessary. I wasn’t planning on killing myself. And anyways...” I paused. “Knowing me-I’d probably screw it up anyways.” I said, trying to joke.
“You wouldn’t though, right?” Taylor whispered.
“Of course not.” I said.
“So why did you say it should have been you?” Nikki asked.
“Because it was supposed to be me in the car. You see-we would take turns going to the store grocery shopping-stuff like that. And it was my turn that day but I wasn’t feeling well so Monica went instead of me.” I explained.
“Oh.”
“But I am kinda glad I got sent here.” I said, a little louder so Rob and Kellan could hear me, not that I had to try-they were being extra quiet so they could hear.
“Really?” Cam asked. I nodded. “Why?”
“Because I got to meet all of you and you’ve made dealing with this easier.” I said. Taylor squeezed me to him, kissing the top of my head.
“Even Jackson?” Cam teased. I nodded, laughing.
“When he’s speaking to me, yes. He’s a good guy.” I said.
“I don’t get you.” Taylor whispered. I shrugged.
“I don’t like to hold things against people.” I mumbled. There was one exception.
“Good to know.” Cam smirked.
“Explains why you’re still talking to Kellan.” Nikki laughed.
“True.” Ashley laughed. I chuckled. Kellan walked into the living room and sat on the arm of the couch and fell over backwards on Taylor and I. I laughed and rested my arms on his legs.
“Jerk.” Taylor muttered jokingly. Kellan reached up to touch Taylor’s face. Tay pushed his hand away and then proceeded to push him off the couch. Taylor jumped up and dashed outside as Kellan got to his feet and took off after him. I shook my head and stood up, going into the kitchen to get a drink. I hopped up on the counter next to where Rob was standing. He looked at me and smiled.
“Thank you.” I said, taking a sip of my water.
“For what?” He asked, tilting his head.
“Doing clean up.” He grinned.
“My pleasure. Thank you for cooking for us.” I smiled.
“My pleasure.” I said back. He smiled.
“So-are you really ok?” He asked, softly, tucking a loose strand of my bangs behind my ear. I nodded.
“I meant it when I said you guys are helping me. I thought I’d have to try really hard to act normal and like everything was fine.” I said quietly, playing with my fingers. He gently took my hands as I continued. “But when I’m with you guys-I don’t even have to try to smile or laugh-it just happens, and easily, too. That’s what surprised me.” I said softly. “I barely knew you and I was acting more like myself than I have in years.” I mumbled, finally looking up to meet his soft blue eyes.
“This may sound selfish-but I’m glad.” He carefully raised my hand to his lips and placed a tiny kiss on the center of my palm like I was made of glass. The feeling of his soft lips sent a tingle up my arm. He slowly let go of my hand and I gently slid off the counter, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head against his chest. His arms tightened around my shoulders and he pressed his lips to the top of my head.
I really liked Rob-he was a good guy who seemed to accept me for me-tom boy-ness and all. I stepped away from him as a question occurred to me.
“What?” He asked.
“Can I ask you something.” I asked. “And don’t laugh.” I said and he nodded solemnly. “Do you think I act like a girl?” I asked quietly, dropping my gaze. He let out a loud laugh and pulled me against him.
“Very much so.” He said, still laughing.
“You said you wouldn’t laugh.” I pouted. He struggled to get himself under control.
“Why do you ask?” He asked softly, letting me go. I shook my head.
“Just something someone said once. But you guys ...treat me differently.” I said. He looked at me strangely as if trying to read my mind. “It sucks, doesn’t it? Not having Edward’s gift?” I chuckled.
“How did you know?” He asked, surprised, relaxing his face. I just shrugged. “I think maybe you do have Edward’s power.” He laughed.
“No-it’s just the way you were looking at me like you were trying to see through me.” I said.
“Oh.” He pressed his lips firmly to my forehead. He took my hand and led me into the living room where everyone was sitting. Taylor and Kellan were still outside. Rob sat on the couch and I laid down, putting my head in his lap and stretching my legs out. Kellan came in and shook himself off like a dog as he stood over me. Water sprinkled off him onto my face. It took me a minute for everything to register.
“Oh!” I said, surprised. “Is it raining out?” I asked. Kellan let out a bark of laughter as I felt Rob shaking silently.
“Yeah-it looks like a pretty bad storm.” He said, sitting on my stomach. I groaned a little, but didn’t push him away.
“Don’t break her!” Ashley gasped.
“I won’t.” He promised seriously. I chuckled at the serious tone. We sat like that for a little while until Taylor came in and gave Kellan a dirty look.
“Aw-look. He’s jealous because I’m on Maggie.” Kellan teased.
“Yeah-that’s it.” Taylor said sarcastically, even though there was a light pink to his tan cheeks. I smiled.
“I think we’d better get going.” Kristen said, laughing. The girls stood up and got their shoes on. Kellan stood up off of me and helped me up and Rob and Cam were soon to follow. Ashley had the bowl of riggies in hand as she gave me a hug and a light peck on the cheek.
“See you tomorrow, honey.” She said. I smiled my agreement as I got hugs from Kristen and Nikki as well. Cam and Rob got their shoes on as Kellan crushed me to his chest. He lifted me off the floor and kissed my cheek firmly. He set me down gently, smirked at Taylor and followed the girls out the door. Cam gave me a quick hug and a kiss and followed Kellan. Taylor gave me a tight hug and I kissed his cheek. He grinned at me before walking out the door. Rob stood up in front of me as he pulled on his black wool jacket.
“Sweet dreams, love. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said before hugging me. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek. He smiled. “Very girl-like.” I smiled.
“I try.” He flashed a crooked grin before jogging out to the cars. I shut the door and walked aimlessly through the house twice before going into my room. The house was too quiet and my thoughts drifted to my parents. Monica and I had gotten them a five day cruise for their anniversary. They should have left tomorrow. I flopped face down on my bed as the tears started and I cried myself to sleep, fully clothed.
I woke up the next morning around ten and stumbled into the shower. By the time I was ready to leave it was eleven. I laced up my converse, grabbed my set pass and walked out to my car. My eyes were still puffy but there wasn’t much I could do about that. I drove to the lot feeling loads better than I had in almost two months. I parked and marched smugly past the steroid-a-saurus. I saw him roll his eyes as he held the gate open for me. I looked around for someone I recognized and saw Jackson and Kellan walking across the school parking lot. I smiled and waved at them. Jackson’s face lit up as Kellan grinned. I stopped walking and waited for them to reach me.
“How you doing, gorgeous?” Kellan asked, sliding his arm around my shoulders and hugging me sideways to his firm body. I looked around, confused as to who he was talking to.
“Yes-you.” Jackson laughed. I felt my face flush.
“I’m good.” I said brightly.
“Good.” Kellan said. We reached the building and Jackson held the door open for me. “So, Taylor’s got quite the crush on you.” Kellan commented. I froze in mid step as they kept walking a few feet.
“What?” Jackson asked.
“On me?” I asked, surprised.
“Well, yeah.” Kellan laughed as Jackson just looked at me.
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you’re hot?” Kellan guessed. I rolled my eyes, not taking him seriously anymore.
“You know-you keep saying that, but I’ve yet to see it.” I said, continuing to walk.
“That’s because your opinions about yourself don’t count.” Jay said. I gave him a sarcastic smile. They led me to the cafeteria and I was about to sit next to Ashley when Kevin caught me by the arm.
“No-sorry.” He said, an apologetic smile gracing his handsome face.
“Wha-“ I started.
“Let’s have you sit next to Kristen and be an extra.” He said brightly.
“No. No. No. No. No. No. No.” I rambled out. “I can’t.” I said, looking horrified.
“Babe-all you gotta dooo is sit here and laugh when everyone else does.” Kellan said. I frowned.
“Please?” Jackson asked, looking me in the eyes and I caved.
“Lead me away.” I mumbled, resigned to my fate. Kellan grinned and slapped my butt as I turned. I threw him a death glare. “Do that again and lose a hand.” I warned. He smirked and everyone else chuckled as Kevin pulled me away.
He sat me at a table with some of the other people I knew from the past week. I squeezed my eyes and tried my hardest to make myself invisible.
“It won’t work.” Michael Welch whispered from behind me. He played Mike Newton. I blew out a sigh.
“I know.” He chuckled. Kevin called action and the scene began.
“Are you ok?” He asked worriedly. “What happened?” He asked, looking between Taylor and me.
“I just got some dust in my eyes from walking into a tree.” I lied. Hey-if I’m gonna lie why not make it believable?
“Is your head ok? Didn’t hurt the tree, did you?” He asked, his hand on top of my head turning it gently. I started to answer, but caught what he said and looked up at his face to see him smirking.
“No, jerk, I didn’t hurt the tree.” I managed to say.
“Ok, good.” He said, slinging an arm around my shoulders as Taylor kept a tight grip on my hand, looking at me every so often. I felt a little better that at least someone knew. Jay led me over to the group where Kristen smiled at me as she eyed Jackson’s arm.
“So what did you do yesterday after we left?” Kellan asked me. I shrugged.
“Flipped through a thousand channels twice, cleaned, moved my room around, moved the living room around...” I listed.
“Wait-the living room?” Rob asked. I nodded. “The one with all that heavy furniture?” I nodded again. “Completely mental.” He muttered.
“Why didn’t you call for help?” Taylor asked, offended. I chuckled. They were making a bigger deal out of this than need be.
“One: because you were all working, bee: the stuff wasn’t that heavy and three-it’s therapeutic.” I said. Ashley and Nikki laughed.
“Lemme see your phone.” Ashley said to me, holding her hand out. It took my brain a few seconds to catch up with that as Jackson’s hand started playing with my hair. I slowly dug it out of my left pocket with my right hand and gave it to her.
“Cute skirt.” Kellan winked. I smirked.
“Thanks.” I replied.
“Know what it would look even better on?” He asked and I laughed.
“If you say your floor I’ll never speak to you again.” I said, still smiling.
“Well, just kill my hopes, then.” He muttered. Rob pushed him jokingly as Ashley gave my phone to Nikki who started typing quickly.
“You just got a text message from someone named Jut.” Nikki said, confused.
“Oh-yeah-you can just ignore it. It’s probably not important.” I said casually. It was hard to care too much about Justin when Jackson had his arm around me like he did.
“Who’s Jut?” He whispered, his lips brushing my ear. I swallowed a few times.
“Justin’s an old friend.” I said quietly, my voice wouldn’t go any louder. The phone got passed to Rob, then Kellan, then Cam, then Kristen, then Taylor and finally to Jackson. I watched as he entered his number into my phone and shut it before sticking it in my pocket for me. I struggled to keep my face casual, but my pulse was twice as fast as it should have been for just standing still.
The next day Jackson was back to texting, but not speaking to me.
The day after that-he was a total sweet heart, holding doors open for me and he even brought me coffee when he saw I was falling asleep in the cafeteria.
The day after that he was back to texting-so he wasn’t speaking to me. And they had been doing the night shots all week so we couldn’t even go out to dinner.
After a week of this going on-I saw the pattern. On the days he was texting-Jackson was avoiding me at all costs. On the days he wasn’t texting-he was the friendliest person ever.
The guy of my dreams was bipolar.
Alright-I can handle that. I knew the pattern so I knew what days to avoid him on. Although, my Kevin problem wasn’t so easily solved.
He was still calling me Monica. I was going to start wearing name tags or something.
At the beginning of my second week I was sitting at one of the tables in the cafeteria of the set. My head was down on the table and I was focusing completely on the cool surface touching my skin. Not only was this a texting day-but it was also my parent’s anniversary.
I doubted my ability to make it through the day. I barely made it out of bed! I was still in pajama pants, flip flops and a tank top with a huge hoodie. My hair had been thrown up in a messy bun and I was wearing my glasses again.
Taylor sat next to me as a few others sat down as well. I didn’t bother looking up to see who it was. Taylor saw my blank expression and waved his hand in front of my face. The motion should have made me blink but I was too focused on the table to really be paying attention to what I was seeing.
“Maybe she’s catatonic?” He guessed to the others. I sighed as I slowly focused on my surroundings. Now that I had distractions-I could afford to think. I sat up slowly and shook my head in response to his statement.
“I’m fine.” I mumbled. Kellan was seated next to me as Rob was next to him and Ashley was between Taylor and Rob.
“Is this because of Jackson?” Ashley asked quietly. I was pretty sure that by now everyone had at least a feeling I liked him. I shook my head.
“Not completely.” I said, forcing my voice to be heard. “Yeah-it’d be easier if he were speaking to me today, but it isn’t him.” I said, picking at the chipping nail polish of my thumb nail.
“So what is it?” Kellan asked. I shook my head.
“Not now please.” I said quietly. “Not when it’s so crowded here.” They nodded. We were quiet for a minute and my thoughts weren’t helping. “Someone say something so I can focus on it.” I said.
“Chicken Riggies!” Kellan said randomly. He succeeded in not only distracting me, but he also made me laugh. I chuckled and looked at him.
“What about them?” I asked.
“You need something to focus on-you could focus on making them for us tonight.” He said excitedly. I nodded, liking the sound of his idea.
“Yeah-ok.” I agreed. “And you’ll come around...what? 7?” I asked.
“Sure!” Kellan grinned.
“Alright-then I’ll go in a little while to get the stuff.” I said, extremely grateful to Kellan.
“Sounds good.”
“Any food allergies I should know about? Anyone not like mushrooms?” I asked.
“I think you’re all set, love.” Rob smiled. “Just make them the way you normally would.” I smiled.
“Alright, then.” I said. I listened to them talk for a little while longer as Kellan played with my hair, making me sleepy.
“You ok, babe?” Kellan whispered as I leaned into him, my back against his firm chest.
“Mhm.” I said comfortably, letting my mind go blank. “You’re just making me sleepy, relaxed.” I said. He chuckled.
“Is that good?” He asked. I was vaguely aware that the others were listening, but I was too far gone to care.
“Very-I don’t wanna think.” I said numbly.
“Well, then-I’m glad I could help.” He said softly.
“Mmm.” I said. I heard Rob laugh.
We sat there for a little while longer before I decided I should go shopping for the stuff I would need. I lifted my head off the table, waking myself up.
“Alright-I should get going.” I said, rubbing my eyes. “Can you guys let Kevin know I’m taking off?” I asked.
“Sure.” Taylor nodded.
“Thanks.” I stood up and promptly lost my balance as the blood rushed to my head. Taylor and Kellan grabbed my wrists, catching me. I felt my face turn bright red. Rob looked at me, concerned as Kellan and Taylor continued to hold me up.
“I’m fine-just light headed.” I assured him. I checked my balance before I tugged on my wrists so they would let go. I turned around and saw Jackson watching me from the doorway to the rest of the building. I bit my lip but walked out the door that led my directly outside. I headed for the main gate and headed for my car. I began focusing on what I was touching so I wouldn’t have to think about my parents. I grabbed my keys out of my shoulder bag. Touch keys. Touch handle. Touch seat. Touch steering wheel. Touch seat belt. Touch ignition. Touch iPod. Tough heater. Touch gear shift. Touch steering wheel. Touch. Touch. Touch. Touch.
I focused like that until I reached the store and had to focus on what I was buying. I got everything I needed; I didn’t even need a list anymore I had made it so much I knew the ingredients by heart. I grabbed a $50 iTunes card and headed for the check out. I focused on touching as I put everything on the conveyor belt and headed back out the car.
Touch keys. Touch trunk. Touch bag. Touch bag. Touch bag. Touch trunk. Touch cart. Don’t trip. Touch handle. I repeated the process driving home. I pulled into the garage and shut off the Impala. I got the bags into the house and busied myself around the kitchen, easily focusing on not cutting off a finger.
I had everything almost all ready at six thirty when Kevin rushed in. I smiled pleasantly at him. He looked at me before pulling me into a big hug, kissing the top of my head.
“You doing ok, kid?” He asked, holding me at arms length to look at me.
“As long as I don’t let myself think.” I mumbled. He smiled sadly and gave me a chuck under my chin.
“You’re a good kid.” He said distractedly. I felt my face get warm.
“Hey-are you staying for dinner?” I asked. “I’m making riggies.” I said, motioning to the stove.
“Ah-I have a date tonight.” He said apologetically. “But it will be more fun for you guys if I’m not there.” He said, giving a little laugh.
“Have fun.” I said quietly.
“Save me some riggies-I’ll have them tomorrow.” He said, heading for the stairs.
“Kay.” I said dejectedly. He left about ten minutes after that, stealing a mushroom out of the pan.
“Mmmm-delicious.” He said. He kissed the side of my head. “I told everyone to just walk right in.” He said, smiling. I nodded.
“Have fun.” I said, really meaning it. He grinned before skipping out the back door.
After a few minutes I decided it was way too quiet so I grabbed my iPod and put my ear buds in, turning it on. Dear Maria by the All Time Low came on. I started singing, but I could still hear my self so I turned up the volume.
At exactly seven, everything was done. I turned off the heat under the large Dutch oven and went to get the largest bowl to put it in. Unfortunately the bowl was way over my head. I stood on my tip-toes and stretched for it, hoping to miraculously grow-but it wasn’t happening. I sighed and turned to get a chair, walking directly into Rob. I let out a scream as his arms folded around me, holding me close to him as he shook with silent laughter. I got my breathing under control and pushed him in the chest.
“Jerk.” I mumbled, yanking out my ear buds.
“Sorry.” He whispered.
“How long have you been here?” I asked.
“Just a few minutes. We were listening to you sing. When you stopped I came to see if you were ok.” He smiled. I sighed. “You have a very good voice.” He complimented. I felt my face flush.
“Thanks.” I mumbled.
“Now-what were you reaching for?” He asked. I pointed to a large brown bowl. It was almost vat-like.
“I need that bowl-it’s the only one big enough but I need a chair to get it.” I said, side stepping him.
“Don’t be absurd.” He smirked. “Go say hi to everyone. I’ll get it for you.” I kissed his cheek and went into the living room where everyone but Jackson sat. I felt my face fall momentarily as I realized he wouldn’t be coming at all. I waved to everyone.
“Hey, guys.” I said. Taylor beamed, Cam waved, Nikki, Ashley and Kristen all smiled and Kellan grinned at me.
“I didn’t know we were getting dinner and a show.” He said, referring to my singing. I rolled my eyes.
“I hope you committed the sound to memory, sweetheart, because that’s the last time you’re ever going to hear it.” I said. He grinned.
“That’s what you think.” He smirked. I just shook my head and went back into the kitchen where Rob had set the bowl on the counter. “Thank you.” I smiled at him. He nodded.
“Now what?” He asked. I looked at him as I got the Dutch oven off the stove.
“What do you mean?” I asked as I attempted to hold the heavy pan while guiding the pasta into the bowl with the spoon in the other.
“What else can I do to help?” He asked, taking the pan from me. I laughed.
“Silly-you’re not here to do work.” I said. I finished with that and stuck the large plastic spoon into it. I took the Dutch oven and quickly washed it so I wouldn’t have to later. “Thanks for the help, now go relax it will be ready in a second.” I said, pushing him towards the doorway. He swiftly hugged me and kissed the top of my head.
“It smells absolutely wonderful.” He whispered before going into the living room. I smiled and quickly did a mental head count and got out the right amount of plates. I got out forks, napkins and glasses. I put all of it on the dining room table, which sat in the large room off of the kitchen. I carried the large bowl into the dining room and set it in the middle of the table. I walked back into the living room and sat on the arm of the couch next to Taylor.
“What do you guys want to drink?” I asked. Kellan looked at me from in front of the built in book case.
“Is it ready?” He asked excitedly. I nodded and he came over to stand in front of me. I looked at him cautiously and sighed as he picked me up over his shoulder. He carried me into the dining room and set me down.
“Wouldn’t want you to trip.” He smirked. “Don’t worry-we can get our own drinks.” He said, patting the top of my head. I smiled as everyone else came into the room.
“Mmmmm-Maggie-it smells so good!” Ashley said. I smiled proudly.
“Well-help yourself.” I said, standing back, letting them go first.
“Are we eating in here?” Taylor asked. I shrugged.
“Where-ever, in here, the living room-it’s up to you guys.” I said casually.
“I vote the living room.” Kellan voted loudly.
“Agreed.” Cam said. Everyone got their plates and drinks and we went into the living room to eat.
It was silent for a few minutes while everyone ate. I waited nervously for their reactions.
“Oh my God. This is amazing!” Ashley said. I smiled as everyone else agreed just as enthusiastically.
“You really did a good job.” Cam complimented. I smiled.
“I’m glad you all like it.” I said, forking my first bite into my mouth. Everyone relaxed into their own conversations and Taylor looked at me since he was sitting next to me.
“How you doing?” He asked quietly. Ever since I told him my secret-the reason I was here with Kevin-Taylor was always making sure I was alright.
“I’m ok. Today was just hard.” I whispered. “Today was their anniversary.” I explained, my voice barely above a whisper. He squeezed my hand.
“I’m so sorry.” He said softly. I shrugged, not wanting to think about it.
“Hey, pssssst-Rob!” Kellan fake-whispered, meaning for everyone to hear him.
“What?” Rob fake whispered back. I shook my head.
“So, Maggie’s a good cook-and she’s hot. I’d say we’re kinda lucky.” Kellan fake whispered.
“Where did you two learn to whisper? In a helicopter?” I asked rhetorically, breaking up their conversation. Everyone just laughed.
The talking and laughter died down and I began to feel uneasy.
“Hey, Maggie?” Ashley started, not looking at me. Uh-oh.
“Yeah?” I replied uncertainly.
“We have a question-but don’t feel obligated to answer-it’s totally up to you.” She rushed. I blew out a sigh.
“Go ahead.” I said quietly-already knowing the question.
“Who’s Monica?” She asked softly. I took a deep breath.
“Monica is my...late twin sister.” I said slowly, struggling with the words. They sounded foreign. Taylor laced his warm fingers with mine comfortably.
“By late you mean...” Cam trailed off.
“Dead.” I said firmly. There! I said it! Everyone winced at the harshness.
“How?” Nikki asked.
“Guys-“ Taylor started, but I squeezed his hand, stopping him.
“In a car crash with my parents about a month and a half ago.” I said, blinking furiously.
“Oh my gosh, honey I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. I shouldn’t have brought it up.” Ashley rushed.
“It’s ok. I would have told you sooner or later.” I mumbled. “Today was just exceptionally difficult because it was my parents’ 25th anniversary.” I said, my voice breaking. I set my plate down and covered my eyes for a minute, trying to get control.
“How’d it happen?” Kellan asked. I looked up to him just as Nikki back handed him in the stomach. “Ow.” He muttered. “You don’t have to answer that.” He sighed.
“A mack truck-18 wheeler ran into the driver’s side. My mother and Monica were killed instantly-my dad died a few hours later in the hospital.” I said, my voice barely audible. I gave a loud sniff and Taylor pulled me against his chest. I felt something pointy hit my shoulder.
“Ow.” I mumbled.
“I thought you could use one.” I heard Kellan say. I looked and saw the box of tissues. Nikki hit him again. “Ow! What? I’m just trying to be helpful.” He whined. I chuckled. “See! I made her laugh.”
“Thanks, Kellan.” I said, wiping my eyes and still chuckling, I sat up. “Alright-now that I’ve killed the mood-can we move on please?” I requested.
“Sure thing.” Kristen said.
“How old are you, Maggie?” Kellan asked. I laughed at the randomness.
“Twenty.” I said. My 21st birthday was in two weeks.
“When’s your birthday?” Rob asked.
“Not telling.” I responded promptly.
“Why not?” Cam whined.
“Because I don’t want people making a big deal out of it.” I said.
“We won’t.” Kellan said. I raised an eyebrow at him. “Swear to God.” He said, holding up his right hand.
“No presents.” I warned them. Rob sighed.
“Why are girls always so picky?” He asked, looking at Cam. Cam just shrugged, smirking.
“Dunno, dude.” He said. Well, then-if I was being picky I just wouldn’t tell them.
“Hmph.” I said, before stabbing a noodle and sticking it in my mouth.
“Oh-what? Now you’re not going to tell us?” Rob asked. I shook my head.
“I don’t want to be picky.” I retorted. Everyone just laughed at me.
“Alright-fine-no presents.” Rob sighed. I bit my lip, still not wanting to tell them.
“Please?” Taylor asked sweetly, batting his eyelashes at me. I sighed.
“Fine. It’s in two weeks exactly.” I mumbled.
“Just after the holiday.” Kellan noted. “Hey-your birthday could be a national holiday! It’s close.” He said. Nikki threw a couch pillow at him.
“You’re such a dork.” She laughed.
“Actually-it was supposed to be on Thanksgiving.” I said quietly.
“Seriously?” Cam asked, surprised. I nodded. “Anyways-I won’t be any fun on my birthday this year.” I said.
“We’ll make you fun.” Nikki said brightly. “We’ll get you drunk.” I laughed.
“Alright-it’s a deal.” I said, not taking them seriously. They’d probably forget by then anyways.
We finished eating in good spirits and I went to go do clean up but Kellan had me by my wrists from behind.
“Guys-come on!” I whined.
“Taylor!” Rob called. Taylor walked into the kitchen with a bemused smile on his face as he watched me struggle pointlessly against Kellan’s iron grip. I could have made him let go-but to be honest-I was glad they were doing clean up. Kristen and Ashley split the left over riggies into two containers: one for them to take and one for here.
“Yeah?” Taylor replied casually.
“Keep her out of the kitchen.” Kellan said, handing my wrists to Taylor. I sighed as he took them, gently rubbing his thumbs over the smooth skin on the inside of my wrists.
“Come on.” He said, smiling.
“But-“ I protested, looking over my shoulder.
“They’ve got it. They probably won’t break anything, either.” He said jokingly.
“Well-if you do break anything-make sure you break it before you wash it. That’s what I do.” I said. They all laughed. “What? It’s less work that way.” I defended.
“So, you break dishes a lot?” Taylor asked as we sat on the couch with his arm around me.
“Only all the time.” I said, chuckling. “My hands shake a lot, so I drop them...aaaand they break.” I said and he chuckled. I settled into the crook of his shoulder, resting my head against the side of his firm chest. “You should have seen the dishes back at my old house.” I chuckled. “They were all mismatched because I kept breaking them. Oh, my parents got so mad at me.” I chuckled half heartedly.
“Why? It’s not like you did it on purpose, right?” He asked.
“Right. It’s just...complicated.” I sighed as Kristen, Nikki, Ashley and Cam came in to sit down.
“What’s complicated?” Nikki asked. I sighed. I knew by now that they wouldn’t give up-I had to tell them.
“My parents...” I blew out a sigh, trying to find a nice way to put it. “Well-they usually took Monica’s side over mine.” I said, looking down at my lap.
“Oh, honey, I’m sure that’s not true.” Ashley said. I scoffed.
“Not in a mean way-but it’s still true.” I said.
“How?” Kristen challenged.
“Moni and I would come home and we each had eight classes. I’d have seven grades above ninety and one that was in the eighties. It was usually math-I suck at math. And Moni would have about six in the nineties and failing the other two. I’d get a lecture about how I need to bring my grades up and stop being so lazy.” I said quietly. “While Monica got a pat on the back.” I started tracing the lines on Taylor’s hand. “My sister was always the perfect one.” I bit my lip as I felt the tears well up in my eyes.
“Kevin doesn’t think so.” Cam commented. “You should have heard the way he was talking about you.” He smiled. “He talked about you like you were his own daughter that became president or something.” I felt my face flush.
“Wait-if you’re twenty-technically you don’t have to be here, right?” Taylor asked. I chewed on my lower lip.
“Well, actually-I do.” I said quietly.
“Why? Aren’t you legal?” Kristen asked. I let out a short laugh.
“Yeah. The courts ordered me to stay with Kevin for a few months.” I said. I didn’t say the reason why-but I had a feeling they’d ask.
“Why?” Ashley spoke up. I smiled to myself.
“Sort of like a suicide watch thing.” I said. “Unnecessary in the truest sense of the word, but the judge was a friend of my dad and I made the mistake of saying that I should have been in the car, instead of Monica. So the judge was just watching out for me and such.” I said with a wave of my hand. Everyone was quiet. “I said un necessary. I wasn’t planning on killing myself. And anyways...” I paused. “Knowing me-I’d probably screw it up anyways.” I said, trying to joke.
“You wouldn’t though, right?” Taylor whispered.
“Of course not.” I said.
“So why did you say it should have been you?” Nikki asked.
“Because it was supposed to be me in the car. You see-we would take turns going to the store grocery shopping-stuff like that. And it was my turn that day but I wasn’t feeling well so Monica went instead of me.” I explained.
“Oh.”
“But I am kinda glad I got sent here.” I said, a little louder so Rob and Kellan could hear me, not that I had to try-they were being extra quiet so they could hear.
“Really?” Cam asked. I nodded. “Why?”
“Because I got to meet all of you and you’ve made dealing with this easier.” I said. Taylor squeezed me to him, kissing the top of my head.
“Even Jackson?” Cam teased. I nodded, laughing.
“When he’s speaking to me, yes. He’s a good guy.” I said.
“I don’t get you.” Taylor whispered. I shrugged.
“I don’t like to hold things against people.” I mumbled. There was one exception.
“Good to know.” Cam smirked.
“Explains why you’re still talking to Kellan.” Nikki laughed.
“True.” Ashley laughed. I chuckled. Kellan walked into the living room and sat on the arm of the couch and fell over backwards on Taylor and I. I laughed and rested my arms on his legs.
“Jerk.” Taylor muttered jokingly. Kellan reached up to touch Taylor’s face. Tay pushed his hand away and then proceeded to push him off the couch. Taylor jumped up and dashed outside as Kellan got to his feet and took off after him. I shook my head and stood up, going into the kitchen to get a drink. I hopped up on the counter next to where Rob was standing. He looked at me and smiled.
“Thank you.” I said, taking a sip of my water.
“For what?” He asked, tilting his head.
“Doing clean up.” He grinned.
“My pleasure. Thank you for cooking for us.” I smiled.
“My pleasure.” I said back. He smiled.
“So-are you really ok?” He asked, softly, tucking a loose strand of my bangs behind my ear. I nodded.
“I meant it when I said you guys are helping me. I thought I’d have to try really hard to act normal and like everything was fine.” I said quietly, playing with my fingers. He gently took my hands as I continued. “But when I’m with you guys-I don’t even have to try to smile or laugh-it just happens, and easily, too. That’s what surprised me.” I said softly. “I barely knew you and I was acting more like myself than I have in years.” I mumbled, finally looking up to meet his soft blue eyes.
“This may sound selfish-but I’m glad.” He carefully raised my hand to his lips and placed a tiny kiss on the center of my palm like I was made of glass. The feeling of his soft lips sent a tingle up my arm. He slowly let go of my hand and I gently slid off the counter, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head against his chest. His arms tightened around my shoulders and he pressed his lips to the top of my head.
I really liked Rob-he was a good guy who seemed to accept me for me-tom boy-ness and all. I stepped away from him as a question occurred to me.
“What?” He asked.
“Can I ask you something.” I asked. “And don’t laugh.” I said and he nodded solemnly. “Do you think I act like a girl?” I asked quietly, dropping my gaze. He let out a loud laugh and pulled me against him.
“Very much so.” He said, still laughing.
“You said you wouldn’t laugh.” I pouted. He struggled to get himself under control.
“Why do you ask?” He asked softly, letting me go. I shook my head.
“Just something someone said once. But you guys ...treat me differently.” I said. He looked at me strangely as if trying to read my mind. “It sucks, doesn’t it? Not having Edward’s gift?” I chuckled.
“How did you know?” He asked, surprised, relaxing his face. I just shrugged. “I think maybe you do have Edward’s power.” He laughed.
“No-it’s just the way you were looking at me like you were trying to see through me.” I said.
“Oh.” He pressed his lips firmly to my forehead. He took my hand and led me into the living room where everyone was sitting. Taylor and Kellan were still outside. Rob sat on the couch and I laid down, putting my head in his lap and stretching my legs out. Kellan came in and shook himself off like a dog as he stood over me. Water sprinkled off him onto my face. It took me a minute for everything to register.
“Oh!” I said, surprised. “Is it raining out?” I asked. Kellan let out a bark of laughter as I felt Rob shaking silently.
“Yeah-it looks like a pretty bad storm.” He said, sitting on my stomach. I groaned a little, but didn’t push him away.
“Don’t break her!” Ashley gasped.
“I won’t.” He promised seriously. I chuckled at the serious tone. We sat like that for a little while until Taylor came in and gave Kellan a dirty look.
“Aw-look. He’s jealous because I’m on Maggie.” Kellan teased.
“Yeah-that’s it.” Taylor said sarcastically, even though there was a light pink to his tan cheeks. I smiled.
“I think we’d better get going.” Kristen said, laughing. The girls stood up and got their shoes on. Kellan stood up off of me and helped me up and Rob and Cam were soon to follow. Ashley had the bowl of riggies in hand as she gave me a hug and a light peck on the cheek.
“See you tomorrow, honey.” She said. I smiled my agreement as I got hugs from Kristen and Nikki as well. Cam and Rob got their shoes on as Kellan crushed me to his chest. He lifted me off the floor and kissed my cheek firmly. He set me down gently, smirked at Taylor and followed the girls out the door. Cam gave me a quick hug and a kiss and followed Kellan. Taylor gave me a tight hug and I kissed his cheek. He grinned at me before walking out the door. Rob stood up in front of me as he pulled on his black wool jacket.
“Sweet dreams, love. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said before hugging me. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek. He smiled. “Very girl-like.” I smiled.
“I try.” He flashed a crooked grin before jogging out to the cars. I shut the door and walked aimlessly through the house twice before going into my room. The house was too quiet and my thoughts drifted to my parents. Monica and I had gotten them a five day cruise for their anniversary. They should have left tomorrow. I flopped face down on my bed as the tears started and I cried myself to sleep, fully clothed.
I woke up the next morning around ten and stumbled into the shower. By the time I was ready to leave it was eleven. I laced up my converse, grabbed my set pass and walked out to my car. My eyes were still puffy but there wasn’t much I could do about that. I drove to the lot feeling loads better than I had in almost two months. I parked and marched smugly past the steroid-a-saurus. I saw him roll his eyes as he held the gate open for me. I looked around for someone I recognized and saw Jackson and Kellan walking across the school parking lot. I smiled and waved at them. Jackson’s face lit up as Kellan grinned. I stopped walking and waited for them to reach me.
“How you doing, gorgeous?” Kellan asked, sliding his arm around my shoulders and hugging me sideways to his firm body. I looked around, confused as to who he was talking to.
“Yes-you.” Jackson laughed. I felt my face flush.
“I’m good.” I said brightly.
“Good.” Kellan said. We reached the building and Jackson held the door open for me. “So, Taylor’s got quite the crush on you.” Kellan commented. I froze in mid step as they kept walking a few feet.
“What?” Jackson asked.
“On me?” I asked, surprised.
“Well, yeah.” Kellan laughed as Jackson just looked at me.
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you’re hot?” Kellan guessed. I rolled my eyes, not taking him seriously anymore.
“You know-you keep saying that, but I’ve yet to see it.” I said, continuing to walk.
“That’s because your opinions about yourself don’t count.” Jay said. I gave him a sarcastic smile. They led me to the cafeteria and I was about to sit next to Ashley when Kevin caught me by the arm.
“No-sorry.” He said, an apologetic smile gracing his handsome face.
“Wha-“ I started.
“Let’s have you sit next to Kristen and be an extra.” He said brightly.
“No. No. No. No. No. No. No.” I rambled out. “I can’t.” I said, looking horrified.
“Babe-all you gotta dooo is sit here and laugh when everyone else does.” Kellan said. I frowned.
“Please?” Jackson asked, looking me in the eyes and I caved.
“Lead me away.” I mumbled, resigned to my fate. Kellan grinned and slapped my butt as I turned. I threw him a death glare. “Do that again and lose a hand.” I warned. He smirked and everyone else chuckled as Kevin pulled me away.
He sat me at a table with some of the other people I knew from the past week. I squeezed my eyes and tried my hardest to make myself invisible.
“It won’t work.” Michael Welch whispered from behind me. He played Mike Newton. I blew out a sigh.
“I know.” He chuckled. Kevin called action and the scene began.