I Want to Be the Prettiest Wreck You've Ever Seen

“Jesus, Jackson.” I rushed. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s fine. You ok?” He asked. I nodded.

“No more than the usual damage.” I chuckled. He just shook his head. The blonde cleared her throat pointedly.

“Maggie-this is my girlfriend, Cara. Car-this is Kevin’s God daughter, Maggie.” He introduced. I offered her my hand and she shook it lightly like she was disgusted to touch it.

“So where were you off to in such a rush?” He asked me.

“What? Oh-I was looking for Rob.” I lied.

“Filming.” He said.

“Well-that explained why I can’t find him.” I joked. He chuckled and she just looked at me disapprovingly. “Well, I’ll see you later.” I said to Jackson. “It was nice meeting you, Cara.” I said, lying through my teeth.

“You, too, Monica.” She said dully. I frowned.

“Maggie.” I corrected.

“Oh-sorry.” She smiled. I half smiled before walking away from them. I wanted to talk to Ashley. I headed for the cafeteria and saw her sitting with Cam. I walked over and dropped into the chair across from them.

“Hey.” Cam smiled. I smiled back.

“Have you guys met her?” I asked quietly.

“Ugh-she’s horrid.” Ashley mumbled, leaning back in the chair with her eyes closed. “They got back last night and all she did was whine and complain.”

“She just called me Monica.” I said. Her eyes snapped open and Cam looked at me carefully. “You guys didn’t tell her, right?” I asked.

“Absolutely not. I wouldn’t tell her the time of day.” Ashley said defensively.

“I’m just avoiding her all together.” Cam said, then smiled at me. “I like you better.” I smiled.

“Thanks, Cam.”

“None of us told her and I really doubt Jackson did.” Ashley said. “Maybe it was just a coincidence.” She shrugged.

“Maybe. But if you’re going to confuse someone’s name that you hadn’t met before, wouldn’t you do something that at least sounds like the right name?” I said. “Monica and Maggie sound nothing alike.”

“If she does it just the once-it’s a coincidence, but if she keeps doing it then someone has a big mouth.” Cam said. I smiled, I loved Cam-he always made me laugh.

“Sounds fair.” I agreed. Kellan dropped into the seat on my left and rested him head against my shoulder.

“Stupid bitch.” He mumbled. At first I thought he was talking about me.

“Maggie just met her and they didn’t get off on the best foot, either.” Ashley said.

“What’d she do to you?” I asked, raising my left hand against his face, holding it gently to my shoulder.

“The entire way home last night she kept bitching about the music and how it was too hot in the car. And then this morning-“ He started.

“Oh yeah!” Ashley added.

“She took forever in the bathroom! Now-I’m living with three other girls and none of them take even close to that long. It was like, what? Two hours?” He guessed, looking at Ashley and Cam for confirmation. They both nodded.

“I don’t even take twenty minutes unless I don’t feel well.” I said. “Like this morning I took longer, but that’s because my neck hurts.” I said. “But not when seven other people have to use the bathroom.” I shook my head.

“What’d she do to you?” Kellan asked, looking up at me.

“Called me Monica.” I sighed.

“What’d Jackson do?” He asked, surprised.

“Nothing. He was just standing there. And when he introduced us I shook her hand and she looked thoroughly disgusted.”

“Wow.” Ashley mumbled. We were quiet for a minute.

“Where’s your neck hurt?” Kellan asked me.

“All over.” I muttered. “I slept on it wrong.” I explained. He got up and stood behind me, starting to massage my neck and shoulders. I closed my eyes, relaxing. Ashley slammed her fists on the table angrily. I jumped and looked at her.

“She’s all wrong for him.” She groaned.

“I know.” Kellan agreed.

“Whatever makes him happy, I guess.” I said, very mellow now.

“Oh, honey, you’ve got it bad.” Ashley said sympathetically.

“Oh-I figured that out a long time ago.” I said. Kellan let out a loud laugh. I let my head fall forward, my eyes closed and I was completely relaxed.

“Monica! Kevin’s looking for you!” I heard her over-friendly, high pitched voice call. It was like nails on a chalkboard. I winced.

“Someone shut her up.” I pleaded.

“OK!” Kellan called back. I dropped my head onto the table. “Come on.” He said, helping me stand up. I stood on the chair and jumped on his back, my knees on either side of his waist. He carried me to the room where Kevin was. I smiled my thanks at him as he left and I turned to Kevin.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Nothing?” He said, confused.

“You wanted to see me?” I hinted.

“Well, I’m glad you’re here and all.” He said, still confused.

“There wasn’t something you wanted to talk to me about?” I asked, just as confused as he was.

“No. Should there be?” I blew out a sigh and walked back towards the cafeteria.

Why would she lie about that? I thought. I reached the cafeteria and saw that the table was full-everyone was squeezed in.

Oh-that’s why. I clenched my fists and turned around, walking towards the library.

Why would she single me out like that? The other girls are way prettier and he’s pretending to be married to Ashley. It doesn’t make any sense. I bumped into a door frame, not paying attention as I walked to the library.

I sat on one of the long study tables and laid on my back, my head hanging off the end. I closed my eyes and let the time pass.

I vaguely became aware that someone was standing in front of my face. I opened my eyes and raised my head to see Rob watching me. He helped me sit up and sat on the table next to me. I sighed and leaned against him.

“I like the eyeliner.” He said after a minute. I smiled half heartedly.

“Thanks.”

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“But a dollar for your insights, or a fortune for your disaster. Iiiii-iiii-iiii‘m just a painter but I‘m drawing a blank” I sang quietly.

“What’s that?” He asked, brushing my bangs out of my eyes.

“Just a Fall Out Boy song.” I said.

“So, what’s on your mind, love?” He asked softly.

“Something about Jackson’s girlfriend is bothering me.” I said.

“Besides the obvious?”

“Define the obvious-because yours and mine might be a little different.” I chuckled.

“She’s dating Jackson.” He said.

“No-mine was she’s absolutely gorgeous-and now I know why I have no chance with Jack-“ He put his hand over my mouth.

“You must stop talking like that. It is one hundred percent not true.” He said firmly. I nodded and he removed his hand. “Now-what’s bothering you?” he asked.

“Well, for one-when she shook my hand she looked grossed out at having to do it.” I started.

“Jealous.” He said simply.

“What?”

“She’s jealous of you so she wants to belittle you and make you feel worthless.” He said. I just stared at him. “Go on.” He said calmly. I blinked.

“And then she called me Monica.” I said, pausing to see what he had to say but he just looked at me, waiting for me to continue. “And then I was sitting with Kell, Ash and Cam and she told me that Kevin wanted to see me. So Kellan brought me to him but he didn’t have to talk to me.” I said. “When I went back to the cafeteria-you were all at the table and there wasn’t any room left so I came here.” I said, my forehead wrinkling in frustration and confusion.

“Hmmm.” He thought for a minute as he smoothed out my forehead. “Well, the only thing I can think of is that she noticed the way his eyes light up when he sees you-we all have-so she wants you around him as little as possible.” He said.

“And the Monica thing?” I asked.

“Well, I haven’t the slightest. It could just be a mistake. I don’t see how she would know anything about your sister.” He said softly. I sighed.

“This sucks.” I mumbled. He pulled me to him and kissed the top of my head.

“I know, princess. Trust me, none of us like her, either.” He said. I smiled-that made me feel better.

“You like me.” I said simply.

“Yes, we do.” He agreed. I beamed and rested my head against his shoulder again.

I avoided Cara and Jackson for the rest of the day. I wasn’t happy. I shouldn’t have to avoid my friend just because his girlfriend’s a bitch.

The next day was my birthday-terrific. I had been planning on staying home that day, but at ten-my cell phone rang.

“Hello.” I said to Ashley, answering it.

“Happy Birthday!” She greeted happily. I couldn’t help but smile.

“Thanks, Ash.” I said.

“So, when are you coming to get your presents?” She asked brightly.

“Oh…um-“ I hesitated.

“You have to-it’s the rules.” She said. I sighed.

“Alright-I’ll be there in a little while.” I said.

“Kay!” She squeaked and hung up. I shook my head, bemused, and quickly got ready to go.

I pulled into the parking spot and skipped through the snow to the gate.

“Happy birthday, Miss Spencer.” He smiled.

“Thank you.” I said, ducking under his arm and into the lot. I continued to the door, careful to kick up as little snow as possible. I got inside and sighed at the instant warmth. I heard someone come in behind me and looked up to see Cara. I smiled politely

“Hi, Cara.” I greeted.

“Oh, hello, Monica.” She smiled. I sighed and let it go.

“Have you seen Ashley?” I asked, looking down the hallway.

“Nope.” She said brightly. I looked at her.

“Oh-ok.” I said before walking down the hallway to find her. Cara followed me.

“So why are you staying with Kevin?” She asked, a strange tone to her voice.

“Um-just visiting.” I said, looking in rooms as I passed them, looking for someone to save me from Cara.

“And then you’ll be going back to your family?” She asked, putting a slight emphasis on ‘family.’

“Uh-no. Back to school.” I said. Where was everyone?

“Oh-and what are you going for?” She asked, watching me.

“Massage therapy.” I said distractedly.

“Do they have a boxing team there?” She asked. I snapped my eyes to her and stopped walking.

“I don’t think so. Why?” I asked cautiously.

“Oh-I have a friend who’s going and he’s really into boxing.” She said casually, but her eyes held mine for a second too long.

“Oh.” Kellan came around the corner and broke into a grin when he saw me.

“Hey, birthday girl.” He greeted, hugging me.

“Hi, Kellan.” I said, relieved.

“Today’s your birthday?” She asked, surprised. I nodded and turned to look at Kellan.

“Where is everyone?” I asked.

“Well, Rob and Kristen are filming the prom scene off set with Taylor, Mike, Anna and Christian and all them. Ashley, Cam and Nikki are waiting for you in the cafeteria.” He grinned, leading me away from Cara. I wasn’t complaining.

We reached the cafeteria and I covered my face. They had a cake. Kellan laughed at my reaction and led me over to the table.

“You guys got a cake.” I groaned.

“You never said no cake.” Kellan pointed out. I sighed.

“True.”

“And it’s vanilla with butter-cream frosting.” Ashley said. “Your favorite.”

“How did you-?” I started.

“Jackson.” Nikki said. I blew out a sigh. He knew me too well. They were all watching me apprehensively. I took a swipe of the frosting and stuck it in my mouth.

“Mmm.” I smiled.

“That was hot.” Kellan said. I laughed.

“Alright-gimme my presents.” I said, sitting down. Ashley put two boxes in front of me.

“From me, Nikki and Kristen.” She said. “And check your trunk later.” I chuckled and opened the card, reading it, smiling. I opened the larger of the two boxes and saw a photo album and looked up at them.

“I don’t-“ I started.

“Open the other one.” Nikki said, laughing. I smiled sheepishly and carefully opened the other one to see a Kodak digital camera box.

“You guys!” I gasped, opening the box and pulling it out. It was hot pink with a black slider across the lens.

“Like it?” Ashley asked. I stood up to hug them.

“I love it.”

“Ok-our turn.” Kellan said, pulling me back into the seat.

“Thanks.” I said sarcastically. He just smirked.

“Ok, technically this is from me, Cam, Rob and Taylor, but I’ll let them take most of it, because I got you something else you’ll need way more.” He said. Cam put a thin, long wrapped box in front of me with a card on top.

“I picked out the card, though.” Kellan said. I smiled.

“Ok, Kellan.” I said. I opened the card and read it, laughing. I set the card with the other one and carefully opened their gift. Inside the wrapping paper was a dark blue jewelry box. I bit my lip as I popped open the lid and saw a silver chain with a small tear drop diamond on it. I just stared at it for a second before looking up at them.

“Can I wear it?” I asked quietly. Ashley skipped over and took it out of my hands. I held up my long hair as she secured the cool chain around my neck. I gently touched the diamond and stood up, hugging Cam tightly.

“Thank you, guys.” I said, hugging Kellan.

“You haven’t seen the best one yet.” He laughed before handing me a small wrapped tube. I rolled my eyes, already having a feeling about what it was. I opened the paper and saw a strawberry flavored chap-stick. I looked at it for a second before it clicked why he thought I would need it. I looked at Kellan and smirked.

“Oh, honey, you wish.” I said before snapping the cap off and swiping it slowly over my lips just to tease him. He watched me before shaking his head, stepping away.

“You give me problems.” He said. I smirked and picked up my camera.

“You wouldn’t leave without a picture with me would you?” I asked, batting my eyelashes.

“Well, of course not when you look at me like that.” He smiled. I got the camera all ready and we passed it around, taking random pictures of everyone, and ate most of the cake.

They got called into a little meeting so I wandered aimlessly to the library, trying not to think about Jackson. He had said before he knew what he was getting me. Had that changed when his girlfriend came? I wouldn’t be surprised if it did. I reached the library and it took me a minute to realize that there was a guitar set upright on the padded couch with a red bow and a little card on the neck with a small square package next to it. I slowly walked over to it and peaked at the card. It was to me so I opened it the whole way.


Maggie-
I’m sorry I couldn’t be with you when you opened this :(
Any songs you write-you have to play for me. Happy birthday, beautiful
-Jackson

I smiled as I picked up the smaller package and carefully unwrapped it. Inside was a leather journal with a silk bookmark attached at the top and pages with gold coloring on the outside edges. I unbuttoned the clasp and looked inside.

I smiled to myself as I closed it and placed it in my extra large purse with my other stuff. I picked up the acoustic guitar and headed for the hallway to take it to my car. At the end of the hallway off of the one I was in, I saw Cara. For a split second I imagined her grabbing my guitar and smashing it in a Cinderella moment. I shook my head, realizing how silly I was being-she hadn’t even noticed me. I quickly went to my car and stuck everything in it, sticking my camera in my hoodie pocket. I checked the trunk and inside was a printer docking station for my camera. I rolled my eyes before slamming the trunk shut. I went back into the school to say goodbye to everyone.

I found Cam, Kellan, Ashley, Nikki and Kristen. I said my goodbyes to them and looked for Rob, Taylor and Jackson. I found Taylor first at the vending machines.

“Hey!” He grinned. “Happy birthday!” I smiled.

“Thanks.” He gently touched the diamond.

“Looks good on you.” I felt my cheeks get warm. He chuckled. “So where are you going? The library?”

“Actually, I was going back to Kevin’s. I was just saying goodbye.” I said.

“Oh-ok.” His face fell slightly.

“I’m sorry, hon, it’s just…today…and Moni-“

“No-I get it. It’s cool.” He smiled again. I hugged him tight.

“You guys are the best.” I said. He tightened the hug quickly before letting me go.

“But I’m the bestest, right?” He asked, winking at me.

“Oh-of course.” I laughed.

“Alright, well, I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” He asked.

“Sure thing.” He gave me another hug and I went to find Jackson or Rob. I was walking around, taking my time.

“Did you like your cake?” I heard Rob’s accented voice in my ear. I smiled and turned to face him.

“It was very good.” I smiled. “Where’d you guys get it?” I asked. He pretended to pout.

“I made it.” He said pathetically.

“You made me a cake?” I asked. He nodded. “I’m impressed. Thank you.” I smiled. He grinned and hugged me.

“Happy birthday, love.” He whispered.

“Thank you, for everything.” I said softly. He looked at me questioningly. “Everything you’ve done for me, since I’ve been here. You all have been absolutely perfect.” He smiled a crooked smile. “And thank you for my necklace-you guys really didn’t have to.” I said, my hand automatically going to the small diamond.

“You wear it well, princess.” He said, smiling. I felt the blood rush to my face. “Have you found Jackson’s gift yet?” He asked. I nodded.

“In the library.” I said.

“Your favorite place.” Rob commented.

“I can’t believe he knows so much about me.” I said, shaking my head. “It’s stuff I don’t say out loud, either.” I said.

“He’s more observant of you than you realize.” Rob said. “He noticed you never wear gold and discouraged us from picking out a gold chain.” He said, absentmindedly touching the chain around my neck. “He noticed you only get vanilla milkshakes, and vanilla ice cream-never any other flavor so he suggested the vanilla cake to me.” I blew out a sigh. “What’s wrong?” He asked, blinking at me.

“This is! He shouldn’t like me so much.” I said. “It’s not right. He has a girlfriend.” I said, my voice breaking a little.

“But he doesn’t love her.” He said, looking at me. I snapped my eyes to his. “You should see the way he acts around her at home. He talks to her just like she’s one of us. Yeah, he holds her hand and everything-but only because she makes him. He’s completely different around you.” I forced myself to take a breath.

“So, why-“ I started and he shrugged.

“I have no idea. He may be waiting until the movie’s over and he goes home to do it. I mean, can you picture him bringing her here to break up with her?” He asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“No-that’s not like him.” I sighed.

“So-patience, love.” He said. I smiled at him.

“Thanks, Rob.” I said. He kissed the top of my head as I heard high-heeled footsteps coming our way. “Tell me that’s not her.” I whispered.

“I’m sorry.”

“Well, aren’t you two just adorable.” She commented. “Hello, Rob, Monica.” She greeted, putting a small emphasis on Monica. She had to know something.

“It’s Maggie.” Rob corrected tersely.

“Of course it is.” She fake-smiled. “My mistake.”

“Hello, Cara.” I smiled politely. I turned to Rob. “Well, Rob, I’m gonna get going I’ll see you tomorrow.” I said. He smiled sympathetically and nodded. I nodded once to Cara and started walking away. My trip took me back by the library and out of habit, I looked in the room. To my surprise, Jackson was sitting on the couch where my guitar had been. His head was tipped back and his eyes were closed, his chest rising and falling evenly. I lightly knocked on the door, half leaning into the large room. He opened his eyes and raised his head, blinking at me.

“This is my hide out.” I said simply. He laughed and patted the spot next to him. I shut the thick, windowless door behind me and sat next to him. He draped and arm around me as I tucked my legs up. It was way too easy to forget he belonged to someone else when he acted like this.

“Can’t you share?” He asked. I blew out an overdramatic sigh.

“I guess I can.” I said.

“Thanks.” He smiled. “Happy birthday.” He said quietly.

“Thank you. And thank you for my presents.” I said, tilting my head to look at him.

“Like them?” He asked. I nodded.

“I loved them.” I said.

“Good, I’m glad.” I smiled to myself. This was entirely too comfortable.

“I need a picture of us for my album from the girls.” I said, digging out my camera.

“Alright.” I looked at the camera in my hands for a second.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked.

“Didn’t really leave me much of a choice on that one, did you?” He teased.

“Oh-shut up.” I rolled my eyes.

“Sure-ask away.” He said, still chuckling.

“Was my camera custom colored?” I asked.

“Yes.” He answered promptly.

“Did you help in picking out the colors?” I asked.

“Yes.” He said. “Why?”

“Just wondering.” I said. “How did you know they were my favorite colors?” I asked.
“That picture you showed my of you and your sister-they were the colors you were wearing. I thought they looked good on you.” He said, playing with my hand gently. I struggled to keep my breathing even.

“Did you tell Cara about my family?” I asked quietly. He froze.

“Absolutely not. It’s not my place to tell anyone and it’s none of her business.” He said angrily.

“I was only asking because she keeps calling me Monica.” I rushed, not liking that he was mad at me. “And the last few times she’s said it like she knows something about it.” He relaxed.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered.

“I didn’t mean to make you angry.” I said quietly. He kissed the top of my head and took the camera from me.

“I’m not. I just want you to know that I would never betray your trust-it’s too important.” He said, turning on the camera. I laced my fingers with his and smiled at how well they fit together, like pieces of a puzzle. “Ready for this picture?” He asked, raising the camera. He clicked the button and before I could take the camera back he clicked another picture of me
.
I gasped and reached for the camera but he jumped up and danced away from me. He looked back at the picture and up at me, completely serious.

“You aren’t allowed to delete this one.” He said.

“Why not?” I rolled my eyes.

“Promise me.” I blinked.

“I promise.” I said softly.

“Good.” He said, coming back to sit with me. I snuggled into his arms before sighing and sitting up. This was so wrong.

“What’s the matter?” He asked, looking at me.

“I have to go.” I said quietly.

“Is everything ok?” He asked worriedly.

“Yeah, I just…have to go.” I said, standing up.

“Well, will I see you later?” He asked, standing up as well.

“Um, I’m not sure.” I said, stuffing the camera in my pocket. I headed for the door, needing to get away from him as quick as possible.

“I don’t get a hug now?” He asked, holding out his arms. I hesitated before stepping into his warm embrace. He squeezed his arms around me.

“Happy birthday.” He said quietly.

“Thanks.” I said before quickly pecking his cheek and taking off out the door. I jogged out to my car and quickly drove home. I pulled into the garage and walked slowly into the house, leaving everything in the car. I’d deal with it later. I checked the mail and saw two tall, large boxes sitting on the porch. I grabbed the envelopes and put them on the front hall table and went back out to drag the heavy boxes back in. I looked at who they were to and saw, in surprise, that they were both to me. I brought them into the large living room to open them. I got a pair of scissors to rip through the tape. The return address was my house from New York. I opened the flaps and saw a million packing peanuts so I retrieved the garbage pail. I dumped the top layer in and found the first layer of stuff, my clothes that I hadn’t packed and left at home. I slowly pulled them out and set them on the couch. I pulled out more packing peanuts to throw them away. They clung to my sleeves, my long fingers and the front of my shirt. I pulled them off as best I could and turned back to the box.

On the second layer of packages were the rest of the books that I had left home because they wouldn’t fit, including my own copy of The Count of Monte Cristo, the binding worn and bent. I stacked those on the floor and removed more foam peanuts. The next layer were clothes I didn’t recognize for a second, but I held up a shirt and realized they were Monica’s. I bit my lip hard as I set them on the floor, away from mine. This must be some sort of sick joke. I pulled out the next layer, my boxing gloves and my dad’s cook books. I set the books down and picked up the gloves. I sighed and dropped them on the floor. For some reason I really wanted to get rid of them. On the absolute bottom layer were wrapped gifts with tags on them, dictating them to me and Monica. The tears welled up in my eyes. I pushed the box aside and went for the other one, knowing I was just torturing myself now. I pulled off the packing peanuts and saw a bubble-wrapped mug. I unwrapped it, snapping some of the bubbles in the process and I felt a little better. Inside the packaging was my favorite mug, it was large and comforting. I set it next to the books. Next to the mug, going deeper as it was bigger, was a box carrying a new tea kettle. I pulled it out and put it next to my mug. The next layer was a square wrapped box and a thin, long wrapped box with a card to my mom. I forced myself to swallow, blinking back the tears that were threatening to spill over. I set them carefully next to our presents and turned back to the box. There was a small box like a jewelry box on top of a card addressed to me. I pulled it out and set it aside for the time being. The next level were boxes on plates, some were my mother’s favorite-her good China that I wasn’t allowed to touch, and some other random ones that didn’t mean a whole lot. I put those on the floor as well and pawed through the rest of the box, pulling out other odds and ends from the house in New York. I pushed the box away and sat down, pulling the small jewelry box to me with the card. I slowly opened the card and read my mother’s neat writing, unable to stop the tears.


Dearest Maggie,
Sweetheart, I know we don’t always see eye to eye on things, but
I just want you to know that I wouldn’t trade you for anything in the world.
You have been such a good person and you are so incredibly talented. Your father
and I are so proud of you. Never forget that. Keep your family close, honey. We love you.
~Love,
Mom.

I read the letter twice before picking up the small jewelry box. I carefully snapped open the top and my eyes fell on a long silver chain with a silver heart locket, a rose engraved on the front. I opened the locket gently and on one side was a picture of my parents, smiling brightly. On the opposite side was a picture of me and Monica. A small sob escaped and I covered my mouth with my free hand. I closed the locket and shut the box, putting it on the floor. I tucked my knees up to my chest and sat like that for a while, tears streaming down my face. I needed a distraction so I looked around and saw the boxes of plates, deciding I should put them away. I picked up my mother’s good China and carried it into the dinning room, setting it on the table. I’d let Kevin deal with it later. I walked back to the other open box and picked up a plate, looking at it.

A sudden surge of anger coursed through me, my hand shaking as I gripped the plate before I chucked it across the room as hard as I could. It reached the kitchen wall and smashed, making a satisfying shattering sound. It lay broken on the floor and I had a flash of a mental image of me, lying on the floor of my room, trying to grasp the fact that my parents and sister were gone. Forever. Never coming back. I picked up another plate and threw it against the wall.

How could they leave me like that? I threw another plate.

It’s not fair! Crash.

Don’t I deserve to have my parents there for me? Crash. My sister to support me? Crash.Don’t I deserve to have my mom at my wedding? Smash.What did I do to deserve this? Smash. I hate my parents. Crash. I hate my sister. Crash. I was down to the last plate.

I want them back. I threw the plate as hard as I could and it hit the wall so hard it dented it. The remains and some plaster dust settled on the hardwood floor and I sank to the carpet, sagging over sideways, crying my eyes out.

I must have fallen asleep like that because the next thing I remember was someone lifting me up to hug me to them and a familiar voice.

“Whoa-what pissed her off?” I heard Kellan ask. I was confused momentarily as I remembered the plates, and the boxes. I raised my numb arms to rub my eyes.

“Are you alright?” I heard Rob’s low, soothing voice in my ear. I shook my head no and stepped away, blinking my eyes to clear them. Rob, Ashley and Nikki were standing a few feet apart in front of me, looking extremely nervous. The boxes and other things were still scattered around. The letter from my mom was lying open on the floor where I had left it. Kellan must have been in the kitchen.

“What happened?” Ashley asked. I shook my head again and swallowed hard. My mouth and eyes were bone dry.

“I need a drink.” I choked and started for the kitchen. My legs were asleep and I could feel the pins and needles in them. I carefully balanced myself as I walked into the kitchen to see Kevin, Kellan, Cam and Taylor all looking at me with the same expression as the others. Kevin had a broom in his hand, starting to sweep up the broken plates. I looked around uncomfortably and saw what a mess I had made of the plates. I bit my lip and looked at Kevin.

“I’m sorry.” I said pathetically.

“It’s alright.” He smiled, hoping to make me feel better.

“She needs a drink.” Rob said from behind me.

“Water? Or something stronger?” Kellan asked, only half joking.

“Water.” I said quietly. “For now.” I added quietly. Kevin got me a large glass of water and I sat right there in the middle of the floor, drinking it slowly. The others slowly sat around me and Kevin sat on the counter.

“You got a letter.” Kevin said cautiously. I sighed.

“I don’t think I can handle any more mail.” I said, my voice slightly stronger.

“It’s from the judge.” He said, passing it over to me. I set my glass down and opened it carefully. The judge, my dad’s friend, wished me a happy birthday and explained how he sent the things he thought I should have, the things that were left to me and the things I had left behind. He hoped I was doing well and he hoped he would see me soon. I crumpled the paper and threw it back to Kevin for him to read.

“That’s his fault.” I said, pointing to the plates. He read over the letter and looked up at me before sliding off the counter and stepping over us into the living room to look at the stuff in the boxes. Kellan followed him as Ashley read the letter. I leaned into Rob, drinking more water. I was really thirsty after crying so much. Kevin came back in and looked at me.

“I’m so sorry, Maggie.” He whispered. I nodded.

“It all just…took me off guard.” I said.

“And the plates?” Kellan asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

“Well-the first one sounded good when it broke and then all of a sudden the box of plates was empty.” I said. They laughed. “My mom’s good China-the ones I’m not allowed to touch is on the table in the other room.” I mumbled. Kevin nodded and stepped into the other room to check them out. Everyone else looked at me, waiting. I sighed.

“The judge who sent me here sent me a whole bunch of stuff from my house. Stuff that I couldn’t fit when I packed, stuff my parents left me in their will,” I paused to take a deep breath. “The birthday presents my parents had gotten us this year, the present my dad got my mom for their anniversary.” I said, my voice trembling-but I had no tears left just yet. I cried myself out. “He thought it’d be a good birthday present.” I mumbled. Kellan snorted sarcastically. I nodded slowly in agreement.

“Did you open the presents?” He asked. Cam smacked him upside the head.

“No-I couldn’t bring myself to.” I said.

“I think you should.” Ashley said.

“They would want you to.” Kevin added from the doorway. I nodded and Taylor got up to get them.

“Monica’s, too, please.” I called. Rob’s arms tightened around me comfortingly. Taylor came back and carefully set them in front of me. I looked around and laughed at what I was looking at. Everyone was sitting in random spots, watching me carefully.

“What’s funny?” Cam asked.

“Do you guys ever question my sanity?” I asked. They had all sat down with me in the middle of the kitchen floor like it was something we did every day.

“Frequently.” Kellan answered promptly. “Why?”

“Because you all just sat on the kitchen floor because I did.” I said, still chuckling. Kellan laughed as Taylor rubbed the back of my hand. Rob kissed the nape of my neck softly, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Maybe we should be questioning our sanity.” Cam piped up. I smiled slightly. Ashley gently pushed the first box towards me and smiled. I looked at the shards of plates on the floor and bit my lip. I really should clean that up first. Kevin followed my gaze.

“Leave it, I’ll get it later.” He said, smiling at me. I nodded and picked up one of my presents first. I carefully opened one side, trying not to rip the paper. Kellan let out a loud, impatient sigh.

“Are you gonna reuse the paper or something?” He asked.

“No?” I guessed, looking up at him.

“Then just rip it.” He laughed. I rolled my eyes and carefully pulled the paper off, revealing a large sketch pad. I smiled and flipped through the blank pages, already seeing what I could draw on them. I carefully set it down to my left and looked at the paper in my hands. I crumpled it up and threw it at Kellan’s head. It bounced off his face before he even tried to catch it.

“Delayed reaction, much?” Nikki laughed. I picked up one of the next packages of mine and tried to be careful as I opened the large box. I threw the paper at Kellan again before turning back to the gift. It was an art box with three sections. One section had soft charcoal and pastel bricks, another had paints, the last one had crayons and colored pencils. In the bottom pull out drawer were paint brushes of all sizes and a smock so I wouldn’t make a mess of my clothes. I ran my fingers over the smooth wood before setting it on the sketch pad.

“So you draw?” Ashley guessed.

“I try.” I corrected. I wasn’t great. Kevin nudged Ashley in the back and when she looked at him, he rolled his eyes. She giggled as I picked up the last of my packages, it could fit in the palm of my hand. I removed the paper, threw it at Kellan and saw a small box of guitar picks. I laughed a little, having a different use for them now than I did when I asked for them.

“How did they know?” Ashley asked. I shook my head.

“They didn’t. I asked for them to make something out of them.” I said, setting them on the floor. I hesitated, looking at Monica’s presents before pushing them towards Ashley.

“Someone else has to do it.” I said quietly. Ashley handed one to Nikki and she took the other. I moved closer to Rob and waited. Ashley opened her box first and inside was a hot pink air mac laptop inside it’s box. I half smiled. Monica hated pink. She had a perfectly good laptop but wanted a new one ‘just ‘cause.’ My laptop was crapping out but I hated asking for things so I just dealt with it. Monica was going to give me her ‘old’ laptop if she had gotten this one. They all looked at me, waiting for my expression.

“Moni hated pink.” I said finally. Kevin let out a soft laugh. Nikki opened the present in her hands and threw the paper at Kellan. I grinned at her. The box in her hand was the Wii yoga fitness game.

“That’s supposed to make you flexible, right?” Kellan asked. I laughed.

“I didn’t know Monica did yoga.” Kevin commented.

“She didn’t, my parents wanted her to.” I said, still chuckling. “I did, though, for boxing.” I added.

“Hmmm.” Kellan mused, looking up at me.

“I’m not telling.” I smirked and he winked.

“I’ll just have to find out for myself.” He said. Kevin cleared his throat uncomfortably. I took the game from Nikki and stood up to take them upstairs. Cam and Taylor stood up and took them from me.

“We’ll take care of it.” Cam said. I smiled thankfully at them as everyone else stood up around me.

“Well, now, the only left is to keep our promise.” Nikki said, smiling at me. I looked at her for a second before I remembered our deal. I suddenly felt like I could use a drink after everything that had happened today. Taylor and Cam came back down and Taylor slung his arm around my shoulders as I leaned against him.

“Alright-who’s getting me drunk?” Kevin started laughing hysterically, holding his stomach.

“Have fun, don’t get hurt. If you need bail money, just call me.” He said, going into the dinning room. I rolled my eyes and looked around.

“What about Kristen?” I asked.

“You’re going to pick her up.” Taylor said. I looked at him.

“You’re not coming?” I asked, frowning. He shook his head.

“I’m not 21.” He said.

“So? Neither is Kristen. You’ll be our designated driver.” I said. He looked at Rob behind me and Rob shrugged.

“It’s worth a shot, and if you can’t, I’ll run you home or something.” He said.

“Alright.” We walked out to the cars and I slid in between Ashley and Rob. Kellan started driving as Nikki went to get Kristen. We were quiet for a few minutes.

“Thank you, guys.” I said, leaning against Rob and squeezing Ashley’s hand. Rob kissed the side of my head.

“For what?” Taylor asked, looking at me from the front seat.

“Helping me today.” I said.

“Babe, that’s why we’re here.” Kellan said obviously. I playfully nudged the back of his seat. We reached the bar and I wanted to wait for Nikki, Kristen and Cam but Kellan marched me in the door and right over to the bar.

“What can I get you?” The bartender asked, smiling at me.

“How about something mild for my birthday girl, here?” Kellan said. I shook my head.

“Double shot of Jack Daniel’s.” I said over the music. Kellan looked at me, surprised as Rob and the others came over.

“Same for me, then.” Kellan amended.

“You said it’s your birthday, sweetheart?” The bartender asked. I nodded. “Got your ID?” I pulled it out of my back pocket and showed him. He squinted at the date in the dim light and smiled. “Well, happy birthday.” He said, pouring the two double shots. “One the house.” I blinked at him. “All of your drinks are tonight.” He said, winking at me. Kellan nudged my arm as Rob’s hand was on my lower back. I looked at Kellan and then to Rob and saw Jackson, watching me, standing behind him with Cara. I clenched my jaw, looking back at Kellan.

“Bottom’s up.” He said loudly. I picked up the tall shot glass and watched as he tipped the glass back and taking the liquid in his mouth, having to swallow it in two gulps. He set down the shot glass and looked at me. I controlled my smirk as I tipped the glass back, letting the amber liquid burn down my throat and setting the glass down upside down on the counter, the whole process taking about five seconds. Kellan stared at me for a second.

“That was hot!” He said.

Eighteen drinks later, Kellan thought I was drunk enough to dance. I was sitting at a tall table with Jackson, Cara and Rob. Kellan was tugging on my arm.

“Just one dance!” He whined. I sighed.

“Get me another drink and I’ll try it.” I said. I was a good drunk-I could hold my liquor. It took a lot to get me drunk. He came back with another drink in a martini glass, handed it to me and pulled me onto the dance floor.

To keep me on the dance floor he kept getting me drinks. I think we were dancing for about two hours, but I’m not sure. I was only telling time by drinks, and I had six drinks while dancing with Kellan. I was drunk now, but more graceful than ever.

Rob came over with another drink for me and Kellan sauntered off to flirt with Nikki. Rob and I danced for three drinks before it changed to a slow song. Rob took my hand gently and I fanned my face with the other.

“I need air!” I said over the loud music. He nodded and led me out a side door to a little gazebo. The music was slightly muffled and the snow was falling in large, soft flakes.

“Your face is so red.” He said, softly touching my cheeks.

“Yeah, well, I’m drunk.” I said as we stepped up into the gazebo. He just laughed, spinning me around like a ballerina.

“I see that.” I spun into his chest and his strong arms clamped around my waist, securing me to him.

“So a little birdie told me that you guys did the prom scene today.” I slurred slightly. He chuckled as we swayed around.

“We did.” He said.

“Was it the same as the one in the book?” I asked, I had already read the script, but I couldn’t quite remember it. Ok, so maybe I was flirting a little, but I was drunk-it can’t be held against me.

“I’m not sure-I haven’t read the books.” He said. “They aren’t that big in the UK.” He said, dipping me backwards as another slow song started. I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

“UK sucks.” I said. He just laughed and kissed my forehead. “So show me the scene and I’ll tell you if they’re the same.” I said, my flirting not as well as I would have hoped for being drunk.

“Alright.” He smirked. “So Kristen and I are dancing like this.” He said, pulling me closer and lifted me up slightly so my feet were resting on his. “And she asks Edward why he saved her instead of letting the poison spread. Go on, ask me.” He said, smiling.

“Edward, why did you save me? Why didn’t you just let the poison spread? I could be like you right now.” I said, remembering the script now. Rob faltered for a split second.

“That was very good.” He grinned. “And then Edward says ‘Is that what you dream about? Being a monster?’ And then Bella says-“ He looked at me.

“I dream about being with you forever.” I recited perfectly. He blinked. “Your turn.” I whispered.

“Hmmm.” He hummed, starting to dip me away from him, his mouth just inches from my bare neck. “And you’re ready? Right now?” He quoted, leaving out the narrative.

“Yes.” I said breathlessly, struggling to control my racing heart beat. It felt real. I could feel his lips almost on my neck. He paused, just teasing me and then he kissed my throat, just off center. A flash of heat seared through me as he planted another little kiss before standing me up right and smirking crookedly at me. I gripped onto his forearms for balance in my light headed state.

“Well?” He awaited my verdict. I leaned against him, shivering slightly.

“You should be illegal.” I said finally.

“What?” He laughed.

“You, Taylor, Cam, Jackson, Kellan-you guys should all be illegal. You are so incredibly detrimental to my well being.” I said, snuggling closer into his arms.

“Leave it to you to use big words when you’re smashed.” He laughed.

“Not that it would matter much anyways.” I continued like he hadn’t spoken. “I’d just end up going to jail for contraband items.” I said, looking up at him. “You guys are too good to me.” I said wistfully.

“It’s not less than what you deserve, love.” He said softly, his face slightly closer to mine. I smirked.

“Robert, are you going to take advantage of me?” I asked, giggling uncontrollably. He cracked up.

“Would you like me to?” He winked. I gasped.

“That was a very Kellan thing to say!” I said.

“I know.” He said apologetically.

“But maybe.” I said, answering his question. He just laughed at me.

“My dear, you are completely wasted.”

“Let’s get me another drink.” I said enthusiastically, popping up tiptoes and lightly kissing his lips. He just shook his head and we turned to go back inside. Jackson was standing on the other side of the door, looking very hurt. I honestly couldn’t imagine why-he was here with his stupid girlfriend. We reached the door and Rob held it open for me, Jackson not paying attention to us. I playfully smacked him butt and he jumped, looking at me in surprised.

“Good game, coach!” I yelled over the music. I saw him laugh but the sound was lost in the loud music. I did watch his smile for a second as he told me I was wasted before Rob pulled me away. I waved at Jackson and my drunken mind made me blow him a kiss. If Cara saw that I’d be paying for it tomorrow, but it was totally worth it to see his beautiful face light up like that. Rob sat me on a bar stool.

“Stay here, I have to go to the lou.” He said over the music. I nodded and before he had even left I turned to the bartender. I felt Rob’s hand leave my waist as the bartender came over, smiling.

“What can I get ya, sweetheart?”

“Can I make a drink request?” I asked. He nodded. “Can you put vodka in it? One of the gold colored ones-I don’t really care what one, a lemon twist and a few drops of the strawberry daiquiri mix in it?” I asked loudly. He nodded. I turned around to watch the crowd. Jackson was back at his table, but he was watching me. He smiled at me and I pointed to the bartender, asking if he wanted anything. He shook his head before looking at Cara pointedly and then back at me apologetically. I sighed and nodded, understanding. She wouldn’t let him. Stupid whore. Someone sat next to me but I didn’t know them so I ignored him, waiting for my drink. I could feel him staring at me so I looked at him and then away. Jackson was watching us and I rolled my eyes. He smiled and the guy leaned closer to me.

“Can I buy you a drink?” He shouted over the music. I shook my head, hoping that would suffice. “Come on, just one drink!” I spun around on the stool and looked down to the bartender who was just finishing my drink.

“No, thanks.” I responded to the guy.

“Well, how about a dance?”

“How about no?” I retorted, now getting angry. How many times did I have to say no before he got the picture. I had my wrists resting against the wood of the bar and he grabbed my wrist closest to him very tightly.

“Let me go.” I said, kicking him in the shin. I felt an arm around my shoulder and looked to see Cam. I smiled at him thankfully.

“Bartender, you have a drink for my girl, here?” He called. The bartender raised my glass to let him know he did and set it in front of me. I looked at the guy on my right and wrenched my wrist out of his iron like grasp.

Cam kissed the side of my head, ordering a shot for himself.

“Jay thought you could use some help.” He said in my ear, just so I could hear him. I looked over my shoulder at Jackson and smiled at him.

“Thank you.” I mouthed. He nodded slightly. I picked up my drink and took a sip.

“Damn! That’s good.” I said, pushing it towards Cam. He took a sip.

“That is good.” He agreed. The bartender quickly made another so he could try it.

“I’m naming it after you, sweetheart.” He called.

“Maggie.” I said, shaking his hand. He grinned. I picked up my drink and Cam led me away to dance. He was watching me like there was something he wanted to say.

“Say it!” I said. He chuckled.

“I’m not usually this out going.” He said loudly.

“You have been, though.”

“Thanks to you. Before you got here, I mostly kept to myself.” He said.

“Why?” He shrugged. “So why are you now all out going?” I asked.

“I dunno, something about you just makes me.” He said and I laughed, kissing his cheek.

“I’m glad.” I said. Someone took the drink out of my hand and I turned to see Kellan. I took my drink back from him protectively as the others came over, Taylor sliding his arm around my shoulders. I leaned against him and kissed his smooth cheek.

“What’s that?” Ashley asked, pointing to the glass in my hand.

“Well, now it’s called Maggie, but I just made it up.” I said, handing it to her. She took a sip and her eyes opened wide.

“Yum!” She said, passing it around, only Kristen and Taylor passing it up. I looked at Kristen.

“You aren’t drinking?” I asked. She shook her head.

“I’m not old enough.” She said over the music. I made a large ‘O’ with my mouth as I remembered and they all started laughing. My glass got passed back to me empty by Kellan. I frowned and he smiled, pulling me back over to the bar to get another. The guy who can’t understand no was still there.

“Couldn’t resist my charm, I see.” He commented and I rolled my eyes. It was more like gag factor. The bartender came back over and chuckled.

“You sure do drink a lot for being such a tiny girl.” He said.

“My friends wanted to try it.” I said. “Can I have another?” He nodded and held up a finger to tell me to hold on.

“So, are you drunk?” Kellan asked in my ear. I nodded.

“Very.” I replied. He let out a bark of laughter and the guy who was trying to talk to me grabbed my butt when I wouldn’t answer. I jumped, bumping into Kellan. Kellan went to move me behind him but I pulled back my right hand and socked the guy right in the face. I felt his nose crunch and his head snapped back.

Kellan grabbed me and held me to him, my back pressed firmly to his strong chest as if he were afraid I’d hit the scumbag again. I bit my lip hard to keep from crying at the pain searing through my hand. I could feel Kellan shaking with silent laughter as the guy took off for the bathroom. The bartender looked at me as the others crowded around me. He started getting a small bag of ice for my hand.

“You ok?” He asked.

“I should’ve punched him left handed.” I said, flexing my fingers. Everyone laughed and I was handed my drink and the bag of ice. Taylor pulled me onto the dance floor to dance some more and pretty soon I was light headed and told him I had to sit. I plopped into a seat across from Jackson and the bitch. I smiled at them both as I leaned back in the chair so I wouldn’t fall off the side.

“How’s your hand, Monica?” Cara asked. I pretended like I didn’t hear her as I looked around. A drink was put in front of me and I looked up to see a guy smiling politely.

“It’s from the dude up at the bar.” He said, pointing to the guy I punched. I rolled my eyes.

“Are you working?” I asked. He shook his head.

“No-I don’t work here-he paid me to bring it to you.” He shouted.

“You can have it.” I said, pushing it towards him. He hesitated.

“I’ll give you five bucks to just take it and leave.” Jackson said, irritated.

“Sure, sure.” The guy said, picking up the glass. Jackson handed him a five and he disappeared into the crowd. I looked at Jackson.

“Thanks, but you didn’t have to do that.” I said.

“I know, but he was bugging me.” He said. Cara rolled her eyes but he didn’t notice. I was very proud of myself for how well I was holding my tongue to Cara. Normally, when I’m drunk, I tend to say whatever passes through my head. My shut up filter gets shut off.

A few more drinks and dirty looks from Cara later we decided to leave. I climbed into a car with Kellan, Ash, Rob and Taylor.

“Thanks guys.” I said, stretching across Rob and Taylor.

“No problem.” Kellan said happily.

“How’s your hand?” Rob asked, touching my slightly swollen knuckles softly.

“Stupid.” I mumbled. “What was I thinking? Right handed?” I scoffed. They all laughed.

“Sorry Cara was there.” Ashley said from the front seat.

“Me, too. Jackson would have been way more fun.” I said.

“I like the idea of me being illegal, though.” Kellan smirked from the driver’s seat. I groaned and looked at Rob.

“You told them that?” I asked. He laughed and nodded.

“It was too good not to.” He said apologetically.

“You all suck. Except for Ashley and Nikki and Kristen.” I mumbled, closing my eyes tiredly.

“What time is it?” Taylor asked.

“Thirty two drinks and five dirty looks from the whore.” I said absentmindedly. Everyone was quiet for a second before laughing hysterically. “What?” I whined.

“Ok-but outside of Maggie-land.” Taylor said, still laughing.

“Two.” Ashley said. I frowned.

“I don’t think I like that you’re all making fun of me and I don’t know what for.” I said, my forehead wrinkling. Rob gently smoothed out the lines.

“So, if we told you-you’d be ok with it?” Taylor asked.

“I’m pretty sure.” I said.

“The way you tell time and the fact that you called Cara a whore.” Ashley said.

“She is, though! Did you see the way she was undressing all those guys with her eyes when Jay wasn’t looking?” I defended.

“Yeah-it’s disgusting.” Kellan said.

“I hate her.” I mumbled.

“I know, honey, we do, too.” Ashley said. I sighed and closed my eyes as Rob played with my hair.

We reached my house and Rob walked me inside. Kevin was just walking out of the kitchen and smiled at us.

“How you feeling, kid?” He asked.

“Very drunk.” I said, sliding off my shoes. Rob gave me a hug and said goodbye to Kevin. I shut the door and went upstairs to get changed for bed.

“Come back down after.” He called. I quickly got changed and went back downstairs, sliding onto the counter.

“Sup?” I asked, holding up a sideways peace sign. He handed me a loaf of bread, chuckling.

“Eat-trust me.” He said and got me a glass of water and set it next to me as I crossed my legs.

“How much?” I asked.

“Until you feel sober.” He laughed. I rolled my eyes and he sat at the breakfast bar and we just talked. He’d ask me a question and I’d just ramble about it. He let me talk, just listening. We used to do this when I was little. No matter what I talked about he always listened to me.

Eventually he asked me a question about Justin and I groaned loudly.

“Stupid prick.” I said, stuffing more bread in my mouth. He asked what I meant and I told him everything; how he went out with me and when I wouldn’t sleep with him he dumped me and said I should act more like a girl. Kevin got up and hugged me.

“He’s a retard.” He said simply. I grinned and kissed his cheek.

“Ok-time for bed.” I said, hopping off the counter. I downed the rest of my water and went up to my bed. I fell into my mattress face down and was instantly asleep.