Keeping You a Secret

“God, you’re so clumsy, Reid.”

I stretched out my arm and caught Spencer before he toppled over the desk and flat onto his face. His body landed on top of mine, and somehow, we both ended up on the floor anyways. He blushed furiously, his light hair covering his flustered features. I chuckled, wrapping an arm around his waist before pulling us both back up. His fingers clutched my shirt, and the blush didn’t seem to fade.

It was fairly late. The rest of the office had gone home, and Spencer and I had decided we would close it up for the day, after we finished working out some last minutes kinks on a case.

“I’m sorry for falling on you,” he mumbled quietly.

I picked up my fingers from his waist and moved a strand of his caramel-colored hair away from his thin face. The pink tint in his cheeks became a little more evident, but he smiled bashfully. His gaze had drifted down, trying to avoid eye contact with me. I lifted his chin up carefully, his eyes refusing to meet my own out of pure embarrassment. I tugged his chin up a little further, grasping it loosely to make my statement a little more profound. Seconds passed, and nothing happened.

Oh, fuck It.

I leaned in quickly, his soft lips meeting my own. His eyes opened wide in shock, but they closed dreamily in two seconds flat. I pulled his body closer to mine, and he pushed further trying to close any gap between us. It was bliss, and it was just absolutely perfect.

I was knocked out of my reverie when the door opened and I transfixed my gaze on the nurse who came to check up on Spencer. For a second I had forgotten the white hospital walls, the bleach smell, the fact that he was still in a coma a week later. I ran my hands across my face and uncrossed my legs. I glared at the nurse the whole time while she worked, her nimble fingers quickly doing the most menial of tasks. She left quickly, giving me a courteous nod before leaving. She didn’t need to say anything.

The rest of the team had already went back to Quantico. We had captured the unsub after he beat the hell out of Spencer, but not before I had my way with him. Garcia came to visit the day after he had ended up in here. She gave me the same sorrowful look that Prentiss had given me only the day before. Only they really knew what was going on between us. I had made up a big fat lie as to the reason I was staying. I knew that if Spencer knew, he wouldn’t be able to forgive me, again.

The clock ticked quietly in the silent room, the small noise making an echo in the silence. I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, letting my eyes look over Spencer’s frame. Color had returned back to his face, and the doctors kept telling me he would wake-up by the end of the week. The only thing I could do was sit, hope, and pray. I just couldn’t magically become God, and make everything better again, but I wished I could. The bandages around his head had come off, and the blue stitching that lined his forehead was fading away.

Overall, he was making progress even though he was dead asleep.

The loud chirp of my cell phone resonated around the room. The bright LED screen was a contrast against the dark room that surrounded me. It was close to ten o’clock, and I was supposed to be leaving soon. Visiting hours were long gone, but I had charmed the nurses into letting me stay a smudge longer. Garcia called everyday to see how he was doing and everyday it was the same thing. I didn’t feel like answering today, it all just got so annoying, even though I loved her to death.

I stared around the white walls, a pale gray under the moonlight. The luminescent light above Spencer’s bed cast a shadow over his hollowed-out face. I sighed to myself, noting I tended to do that quite often now. I had stopped crying three days in, because I just couldn’t anymore. I couldn’t stand to see him like this. I missed the vivacious Spencer who was always yelling out random facts and quirky sayings. I didn’t want the Spencer who lay motionless in a sterile hospital bed. I was so used to it by now, everything was just so void. I managed to successfully stumble over to his bed. I traced a light finger down the side of his face, leaning forward and giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

I left the room sullenly, giving a tiny wave to the nurses who still manned the desk at this hour. Outside, the wind had picked up and was whipping furiously at my jacket. I tugged it close to my body and somehow got to my car without being swept away in the wind. The car rumbled low as I made my way back to the hotel room. The room felt so empty without Spencer going about everywhere, tripping over everything. His bed sat completely perfect, not a crease of the surface of the sheets. I stripped down into virtually nothing, and slid into the cold sheet of my bed.

My eyes focused on his side of the room, reminding me of the empty space that was there. It was these kind of nights that I truly felt lonely. I rolled over, my eyes making contact with the cottage cheese ceiling. The sheets bunched around my armpits some, and I pulled them up all the way to my chin. I had rather stare at the ceiling because it just doesn’t remind me of him. The angry red numbers on the clock blinked slowly, giving off a fiery shadow on the nightstand. It was eleven-thirty when I finally decided it was time to give in to the quiet.

That first kiss changed everything.

He moved his lips away from mine, his breath hitching in his slender throat. I could feel the rise and fall of his chest against my own.

“Did we just do what I think we did?” he whispered fiercely.

I nodded my head, a smirk taking it’s usual place. He lunged himself off me and began to pace quickly around the room, a frantic look in his eyes.

“What’s wrong Reid?” I asked playfully.

He briskly walked over, slapping me lightly on the shoulder. I rubbed at the spot mockingly, and he gave me a sheepish grin in return. “Why’d you kiss me?” he asked softly, now taking a seat in one of the office chairs.

I walked over, sitting on the ledge of the desk he was behind of. “I like you, Spencer Reid,” I stated simply.

He gasped to himself, his mouth hanging open for just a quick second before he closed it quickly. I lurched forward and captured his lips once more. This time there was no hesitation. I bit down on his bottom lip, another gasp emanating from his open lips. I smirked into our kiss, which just got more heated as the time went on. I pulled away this time, realizing that I needed to breathe.

“That was amazing,” he managed to squeak.

I startled awake, my phone filling the silence in the room. It was almost two in the morning. Who in the world could be calling me? I flinched from the light on my cell phone and picked up the phone absentmindedly.

“Hello?” I said groggily. I sat up in bed, swiftly moving the sheets the side, and swinging my legs over the ledge of the bed.

“Hello, is this Derek Morgan?” a sweet voice came from the other side.

“Um, yes.” I said, sounding a bit more confused then I wanted to.

“Sorry to disrupt you sir, but it seems that Mr. Spencer Reid has woken, and he is asking for you.”

I could feel the smile creeping onto my face. He was out for a week, and the first thing he was asking for was me.

I dropped my cell phone as I stumbled to slip on a pair of pants. I didn’t care if it was two AM, I had to go see him now. The ride to the hospital seemed to take forever. I tapped my fingers nervously at every light and drove like a stark-raving lunatic.

I bounded through the double doors of the hospital, the nurses yelling after me to stop, but I needed to be there right then, at that very moment. I reached his room, and I could hear Spencer weakly arguing with the nurse.

“Are you sure you called him?” he pleaded, his voice hoarse after not having been in use for so long.

“Yes, we did Mr. Reid, I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

I heard him sigh, the sound of sheets rustling as he shifted around on the bed.

The nurse walked out seconds later, her gaze meeting mine. “He’s been waiting for you,” she teased, giving me a smile.

I tiptoed in, trying to be discreet. I felt his gaze on my back and I could practically see the smile playing at his chapped lips.

“You came,” he whispered out. The smile that I had been expecting didn’t falter when I finally turned around.

“Of course I did, baby.”

I went over and sat on the bed, his body fitting right into mine.

“I missed you so much,” I breathed into his ear, playing with a stray lock of hair. I felt his body shudder under my actions, and he curled up closer to me than before.

“I missed you too, even though I was asleep the whole time.” He smiled up at me, and I couldn’t help but smile back.

Spencer winced in pain when he tried to wrap his arm around me. I gently placed it to the side, and he pouted back at me. I brushed my lips against his, barely forming a kiss. He craned his neck out to me further, and I cupped his face with my hand, giving him another kiss. It was slow and gentle, and more special than anything ever before. I pulled away, running my thumb over his lower lip.

“I love you,” I said gently.

“I know.” He let his body collapse against mine, his eyes drifting shut.

I let my fingers entwine with his good hand. I could hear the sound of his steady breathing, as he dozed off into slumber again, but this time I knew he'd be awake the next morning.