Count Your Blessings

I woke up the next morning and sighed when I saw the time. Six forty-five. I didn't hear any noise throughout the apartment, and whenever mum went to Canterbury, she was up at the crack of dawn. She had either already left, or she never came home last night. It worried me to think that Ember was with her. What was Em being exposed to right this moment? What was my mum going to say when my grandparents asked why I wasn't with her? I knew that they would have wanted me there. It was just a matter of mum not wanting me to go with her.

It was Friday. I didn't want to get up to go to school, but I knew I had to. If I missed too much more then I would be too far behind. I couldn't let that happen. I wasn't sure how Oliver never got behind. I frowned and started to get angry with myself for thinking of him already. I got up from the warm confines of my bed, and walked into the kitchen. I had another hour until I had to be to school. Tonight, I wanted to come home to an empty house and leave it that way. I didn't want anyone to stop by, or call and tell me I was going out. It just wasn't happening tonight.

I made myself a cup of coffee, and sat in the living room for a while. I had to phone Sylvia later to tell her what was going on. I didn't really want to stop by there this morning. I was even going to take the back way to school so that I didn't have to see Oli. At least, not until I was at school. That is if he decides to show up today. Hopefully he doesn't. I need some time away from him before I get too caught up in him. It can't happen. With that thought, I got up and walked back to the kitchen for a refill on coffee, and to phone Sylvia. It felt like the ringing went on forever before the answering system picked up.

"Hey Sylv. It's Vee. Mum went to Canterbury with Em. She won't be back in day care until Wednesday, at the least. Have a good day, bye." I hung the phone back on the charger, and walked into my bedroom. I picked out something simple and comfortable. The shirt I wore to the club with a long sleeve underneath, a pair of faded blue skinny jeans, and my sneakers. My clothes weren't as soft and comfortable as Olivers were. My jumper wasn't as warm. And my clothes didn't have his scent. I didn't bother showering this morning. My hair wasn't greasy, and my face was pretty clean. I changed and applied makeup before grabbing the leather jacket, and walking out the door.

I was almost to school. It was quiet, and I had time to myself until I heard a familiar voice. Tom's voice.

"Aye! Vee! Over here!" He called. I looked over to see him sitting on a table in the small park with a few other people. Then I saw the black Toyota. I looked away from the group and continued walking. How the hell did they always seem to know where I was, or which way I was going. It had crossed my mind that I should have gone the normal way to school today on the queer chance that they'd be somewhere along the back way.

"Veronica, wait! Come back, we need your opinion!" I heard a female voice call out. I kept looking straight ahead and kept my pace.

I heard footsteps running after me. "Vee, what's going on?" Oliver was running to catch up with me. "Let me give you a ride, at least. You've got another quarter of a kilometer to go." He was now walking next to me.

"No." I said in a dull tone.

"Why not? What's the matter?" Oliver was in front of me now, walking backwards so he could get a clear look at my face.

"Nothing. I just want to walk today." I lied.

"Why aren't you going the other way? Where's your babe?" He asked.

I didn't answer. I just kept walking. Oliver reached his hands out and placed them on my shoulders. He stopped walking, and so did I. Oli pulled my chin up to look into his autumn brown eyes. They were full of concern, and something else I couldn't quite put my finger on. I wanted to say guilt. But I didn't know why. I was always thinking he looked guilty. Maybe it was because I didn't really trust him. Oliver pulled me into his chest and hugged me. I hugged back, not having any control over my body. My mind was on holiday at the moment, and now my body was going to do what it wanted. Leather of my jacket squeaked as his grip got tighter, and my grip got tighter as well. I pulled away quickly when my senses came bck to me.

"I-I have to go." I said looking away from him and running. I ran until I looked back and didn't see him anymore. I lit a cigarette and walked the rest of the way to school.

I stepped inside and instantly wished I had stayed in bed. But I was here, so I had to go through the day. I had to pass my homework in, and get what I've missed. The teachers seemed disappointed, but I didn't really care today. I watched the gray skies outside and hoped it wouldn't rain on the way home. The only class I had with Oliver was trigonometry. He wasn't in class, there really is a God.

I took the back way home, not seeing a single familiar face. Which I was thankful for. I got home, and immediately looked through the cabinets. I took the half empty bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey out of the cabinet and set it on the countertop. I took out a shot glass and a regular glass. I filled the regular glass half way with pop to chase the whiskey. I turned after I took a few shots, and saw a note sitting on the table. I didn't bother to lock the door when I had left today, because when I had left, it felt like I had nothing anyway. I looked at the note, and read the somewhat neat handwriting.

Vee, I'll be over in a while. We obviously need to talk. I'm worried about you. You've become a good friend of mine, and I don't want to see you suffering. Take care until I get there.
Oli

I crumpled the note and tossed it in the rubbish. I wanted to just lock all the doors so he couldn't get in, but at the same time I wanted him here. It was mind boggling that I was feeling this way about him. It was just a month ago that I wanted nothing to do with him. He convinced me to give him a chance, and now all I want is for him to be here. I wasn't sure if it was that I was starting to like him, or just that I had a friend now. Tom seemed like a nice kid as well. He seemed down to earth, and funny. I should hang out with all of them more often. I shook the thoughts out of my head and walked to my room. I yawned and laid down on my bed, I still hadn't taken my jacket or shoes off. A nap would be amazing. I closed my eyes, and felt myself drift off to sleep. I was on the edge of conciousness when I heard a knock at my window. I rolled over and looked to see who it was. A dark brown mop of wet hair, and a pearly white smile stuck out in the dimming light outside. I turned on the lamp on the bedside table, and stood. I was a little wobbbly. I opened the window, and Oliver let himself in.

"You alright? You didn't answer the door." He said shaking his head to get some of the water out of his hair. I raised an eyebrow in reply. "Didn't you get my note?" Oliver asked.

"Y-yeah. Why are you here?" I asked, taking my leather jacket off, and sitting back down on the bed.

"Because we need to talk. What's going on?" Oli looked around the room and saw that the crib was absent. "Did they leave?" He asked.

"They're in fucking Canterbury. I haven't bothered to check and see if they took everything else. The living room, kitchen, and bathroom all look the same. I honestly don't care at the moment." I looked up at Oliver. He seemed to be shocked.

"Are you pissed?" He asked.

"Slightly. I've only had a couple shots." I shrugged, leaning back on the bed leaving my legs hanging off the bed.

"Vee, what's going on? Why did you just run away today?" Oliver sat next to me and laid back as well.

"Because I don't like you." I said, looking over at him. His expression was sad when I said this. "But," I paused. There was a glimmer of hope in his eyes. "But, I like you at the same time." I looked back up at the ceiling.

"Oh you like me?" The tone of his voice told me that he was trying not to laugh.

"Don't get any ideas Sykes. I mean as a friend." Lie. "I mean, I would never think of you like that." Another lie.

"I see." He said, quietly. "So what do you want to do tonight? We could crash a party. We could..." He paused. "We could stay here. We could go to London again. We can go out to dinner and a movie." He offered.

"I am not going anywhere tonight. I am staying here. You're lucky to be here right now." I said, getting up from the bed, and leaving the room. Oliver followed me like a lost puppy, as I walked into the kitchen. The whiskey was still out on the table. I poured a shot for myself, took it, and poured another one.

"I think you're all set." Oliver said looking at me cautiously.

"This one is for you, silly." I said smiling. "Do you need something to chase it?" I asked.

"Nah." Oliver took the shot and downed it. The rest of the night consisted of finishing off the bottle of Jack Daniels, and watching movies. "Come on love. It's time to get you to bed." Oli whispered when the credits started rolling for the movie A Street Car Named Desire. One of my favorite movies of all time. Even though it was in black and white.

Oliver picked me up off the couch. I was half awake. I cuddled closer to him as he walked to my room, turning the tv off on the way there. All the lights were already off, save for the bathroom light that almost always stayed on. He cleared my bed, and put the covers over me. I shivered a little. He walked around, and laid on the other side, pulling me in close to him. Heat radiated off of him and I could feel my body relaxing, slowly drifting off to sleep.

"Thanks for coming over, Oliver." I said.

"It's not a problem, love. I like being here." He laid his head ontop of mine and we both fell asleep.

****
"Wow! Vee, you look gorgeous!" Eva exclaimed. Currently Deveigh, Kate, Eva, Natalia, Lydia, and myself were in Natalia's room getting ready. All of the boys were getting ready at the Sykes house. There was to be some limosine coming later with all the boys.

"Thanks." I said quietly. I looked in the mirror. My outfit was simple. It was the way I wanted to be. I didn't want to stick out from everyone else, and get all kinds of unwanted attention. I didn't even want to go to this event. I turned away from the mirror, and started to help Lydia curl her hair. I was the first one done getting ready because I didn't really do anything with my hair. I put it up halfway, and curled the ends of my hair. The top part of my hair had a little volume, and the ponytail had curls as well.

When we were all done, we went to the back yard for pictures. Natalia's mum was so nice, and an amazing photographer. She had made us all dinner, and gave us each a glass of wine with dinner. I could see that my drinking needed to slow down. Alcoholism obviously ran in my family. I just needed to make sure that I kept a hold on my drinking. I loved being in England. The drinking age is so low, it's awful that other countries make you wait so long.

There was a sudden loudness from in the house, and Natalia's mum took one more picture before the boys emerged onto the back deck. I felt eyes on me, and I looked up. Oliver walked over to me, and wrapped me in a tight hug.

"Hello, love." He said pulling away and kissing my cheek. He let his lips linger on my cheek for a moment and whispered in my ear. "Have you heard anything yet?"

I looked up into his warm eyes, and shook my head. "Not even a phone call from grandmum or grandpop. It's been four day's now." I said, frowning.

"It's alright, Vee. We'll do research tomorrow." Oliver smiled at me, and held his arm out. "Now, if I am correct, we're supposed to be taking pictures with everyone else." He winked as I wrapped my arm around his and smiled fakely. After pictures, we all piled into the sleek, black limosine.

My stomach was in knots when we got to the dance hall. There was music pumping out of the speakers inside, and there were a ton of people outside, and people going inside.

"Ready?" Oliver asked. We were the last to get out of the limosine.

"I have to be. There's no turning back now." We got out of the car, and I shivered with the cold wind that blew by. Oliver put his arm around my shoulders.

"Should have worn a coat." He laughed. "Speaking of coats, if you're a vegetarian why do you wear a leather jacket?" Oliver asked, smirking.

"Because it was cheap at the thrift store, it's warm, it looks good, and it's comfortable." I explained. "Of course, I don't like that it's leather. But it was the best coat I could find that wasn't completely worn out."

"I see. It does look quite good." Oliver handed the person at the door our tickets and we were let into the warm building. Oliver lead me onto the dance floor. I shyly started to dance with him, and as the songs went on the less shy I became. Finally, there was a slow song that came on. "We'll dance to this one, and then go sit for a minute?" Oliver suggested.

"Sounds great." I said smiling. I stepped closer to Oli, only coming to his shoulder. I put one of my hands in his, and one on his shoulder. His other hand was on my waist. This is what I have been waiting for. The slow dance with him. I didn't know the song that was playing over the speakers. I didn't care. I leaned my head on his chest and he pressed his lips to the top of my head.

When the song was over, we walked away from the dance floor area. I saw Natalia, and Matt arguing in the corner. Natalia walked away, covering her face, Lydia, Deveigh, and Kate followed her. Eva and Tom were still on the dance floor. I looked up at Oli to see his reaction. Oli just shrugged and lead me over to get water.

"I'll be right back. I've got to go to the bathroom." I said pointing to the door across from the refreshment table. Oliver nodded and smiled at me. I walked away from him, and walked into the bathroom. I heard talking around the corner of the entrance so I stopped to listen.

"I can't believe what Oli is doing to that poor girl! It's all of their faults! They all think it's funny. He's tricking her! It's all a bet. Matt was just talking to Lee about the bet. They all bet that Oli couldn't get Veronica to fall for him completely before Christmas. I can see that he's going through with it. She looks so much happier when he's with her! I'm going to kill that bastard!" Natalia had said everything that I thought was going on from the very beginning. I knew it was all too good to be true.

I turned and ran out of the bathroom. I saw Oli standing against a wall waiting for me. I turned on my heel and ran in the opposite direction, tears running down my face. How could he do this to me? He said he wanted to help me. I ran out of the dance hall and over to a taxi that was outside.

"Veronica!" I heard Oli yell. I looked back at him and jumped into the cab.

I told the driver the address, and told him to step on it. I left Oliver on the curb and I never wanted to hear his name again. I gave the cab driver the last five dollars I had in my clutch and walked up the stairs to my apartment. There were no lights on, so I knew no one was home. Still, my baby sister was gone, and no one had called.

I was sobbing so hard when I got into the kitchen that I could barely stand. I raided the cabinets for mums stash. She always kept an extra bottle of whiskey in the house for when she ran out. Where it was hidden was the trick. I found it on the top shelf behind some canned goods. I leaned up against the counter, and slid down to the floor. I opened the bottle and took a large sip. I've got two things in my life now. Liquor and love lost. I needed to get far away, and quick.