The Prince and the Pauper

Lyle woke up with an extreme headache. He could already tell he might be in a pissy mood today. Only because his body insisted on being unfair to him, as he put it. He’d restrained himself from drinking alcohol at the party- what gave him this headache?

He sat up in his bed, taking in where he was. Making sure when he drove home last night he wasn’t just being delusional. As he had thought, he was in his own bed. In his own room. But not alone.

Next to him lay the corpse of his best friend. So maybe it wasn’t a corpse. He was very much alive, just dead looking. Donnie’s breathing was so slow and even, it made Lyle jealous. Donnie was always so high strung, yet he could breath like a normal human.

“Hey,” Lyle shook him, “wake up.”

Donnie groaned and turned over, nearing the edge of the bed. Lyle took the liberty of helping him fall over the side, pushing him with his palms.

Over the bed Donnie fell with a loud thump!

“Ouch! Son of a… bitch! What was that for?” Donnie asked, his morning monster already showing itself.

“That’s for crashing on my bed,” Lyle smiled, remembering what had happened last night. It wasn’t particularly a good thing, which is why he wanted to keep the mood light. Light, but without seeming like he was being kind out of pity for Donnie.
Even if he was.

“You couldn’t have waited a few minutes? I would have gotten up,” Donnie yawned, returning a devilish smile. Lyle shrugged.

“What’s the fun in that?” He laughed. “The least I could do after last night is entertain you,” he giggled.

Donnie glared, still smiling, “That was more entertainment for you than me.”

Donnie got off the floor, dusting himself off and sitting back on the bed. He had full intensions of getting Lyle back, he just didn’t know how, yet. He would think of a way, though. When Lyle least expects it.

“I’m going to take a shower. Be out in ten,” Lyle ran into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

“Yeah, whatever! Knowing you, you’d probably die of dehydration before you get out of a cold shower!” Donnie shouted through the door.

Lyle opened the door back up to laugh at his friend.

“It’s not that kind of shower, dork,” he stated.

“Mhmm. And you wouldn’t happen to know anything about this terrible taste in my mouth right now, would you?” Donnie joked.

Lyle got wide-eyed, allowing his mouth to drop. He tried to look genuinely shocked or.. scared, as if just caught doing something he shouldn’t be doing.

“Oh my god, Donnie I’m so sorry. I thought I’d gotten it out in time,” he apologized, closing the door back up and silently laughing at the face Donnie was making after his last words.

Donnie’s face was priceless. Petrified. Appalled. In disbelief. No words could describe his face at the moment. He was going to get Lyle back. He was going to get him good.

Donnie left the bedroom to go use the another shower in the house. He would borrow some of Lyle’s clothes but be stuck with the same boxers till he got home. How gross. He thought.

` ` `

Once out of the shower, Lyle dried off and got dressed, putting on some black jeans and a dark grey shirt. He checked himself out in the bathroom mirror, making sure his hair looked presentable. Wow, Lyle. You. Are. Gorgeous. Naturally, he thought that about himself. Not necessarily because he believed it to be true, but because when you tell yourself you look nice, your appearance is actually better. He thinks.

Lyle walked into the kitchen, looking for something to snack on. When he saw some cereal boxes, he had a sudden craving for a certain type.

He rummaged through the assorted boxes, only to find that the cereal he’d desired wasn’t there. But he really wanted it.

Sitting himself at the high kitchen table, he sulked. Lyle was going to get that cereal. As soon as Donnie get’s his arse out of the shower.

“So, sunshine! What’s on our agenda for today?” Donnie hopped towards the table a moment later. Lyle jumped up and grabbed his wrist.

“First, we’re going to the grocery store. I want my cereal!” he paused everything. “And whipped cream.”

Donnie laughed, “Okay, whatever kiddo. But next place on the list is my house. I need some fresh undies!”

` ` `

“Hey, hey, slow down! The cereal will still be there five minutes from now!” Donnie urged Lyle to slow down, but with no success.

Lyle came speeding into the parking lot of the grocery store, picking a random spot. The teenagers got out of the Hummer and walked inside.

Lyle and Donnie liked to pretend they were thugs. It was just fun doing a pimp walk into the store, nodding at all the heads that turned.

“Yo!” Lyle nodded at a little girl who looked to be around five, pursing his lips like a stereotype gangster.

“Mommy!” The girl shouted.

Lyle and Donnie laughed at the scene. If his life were a movie, Lyle would be a rockstar, and Donnie would be the best friend. Only they wouldn’t be falling in love in the end. They’d just be famous. And hated..

They continued to do their own little strut down the cereal isle. Lyle searched for the box labeled-

“POPS!” Lyle shouted out of nowhere, getting weird looks from surrounding people, including Donnie, who’d stopped his strutting to stare at him.

“The fuck ya’ll looking at?”

Donnie snickered as the heads nearly rolled off of peoples' necks as they went wide-eyed and turned to mind their own business.

Lyle walked with Donnie back out of the isle and he was about to go to a check out lane when he spotted another boy. The guy was looking at the milks, as if he didn’t know which to get. Confused? Maybe.

But the fact someone was thinking so intently on getting a specific kind of milk wasn’t what seemed odd to him. What appeared odd is that from the side, the boy looked exactly like him. A spark went off in his heart.

Just as he was about to go and confront the boy, another one showed up. And by the looks of it, they were flirting. Or maybe the other one was trying to.

For a reason he didn’t know, jealousy filled a tiny part of him. Tiny.

Lyle watched as the guy picked out a milk for him. And as weird as he already thought the kid was, he went over and wrote something on an ice cream freezer. Strange. But what does it say?

Lyle squinted his eyes to read the word and just as he was about to focus his eyes on it, Donnie waved a hand in front of his face.

“Um, hello? Anybody in there? Hell to Lyle.”

Lyle blinked and looked at Donnie before glancing again at the word, but it was gone. He cursed Donnie silently for interrupting his vision.

“Why were you staring at those kids? You know them?” Donnie asked.

Lyle shook his head, “You didn’t think one of them looked a lot like me?”

Donnie looked back and forth between them.

“Sure. But a lot of people look alike these days. It‘s just a coincidence.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Lyle sighed, letting it go for now.

He tried to go to a register as close to the two boys as possible, but Donnie kept trying to go elsewhere. So he had to settle for a line yards away from them.

He let the cashier scan the POPS and gave her his card. In the time it took to do those two simple things, he’d lost sight of the guys.

“Oh, well,” he said to himself. Donnie was probably right. It could just be a coincidence.