Blind
The Beat Drops, I'm So Low
You moped around your beautiful mansion, lonely was the perfect adjective to describe what you were feeling at the moment. Ever since John left for his movie, you just stopped caring about anything really. Of course you love your boys, but you're not as happy with them as you used to be. Maybe it's because you're pregnant or something... but then again you were only now five months pregnant. "Mom, what's for breakfast?" Ryan asked. All three of your boys gathered around the table happily and took their seats.
Ryan's voice shocked you a little, snapping you out of thought. "Oh um, what do you guys want to eat?" you asked.
"Mom, your blueberry pancakes are the bombdiggity." Este laughed.
That put a smile on your face as you replied, "Blueberry pancakes coming up." As you were making the pancakes, this gave you a little more time to think. Flashbacks of breakfast with John appeared in your head.
>Flashback<
"Oh my gosh these are sexy pancakes." John laughed as he continued to pig out on your mother's recipe.
"Sexy pancakes for a sexy man." you laughed, cleaning up the dishes.
John burst out laughing then replied, "No pancake is sexier than my woman." You blushed then sat across from him at the table.
"WAHHH!" one year old little Ryan started crying as he banged his hands on the high chair. You sighed then began to get up but John stopped you.
"Don't worry babe, I got this." John said then lifted Ryan out of his high chair to change him. John was such a good father, and a good fiance. No man could ever be as good as John.
Your thoughts were interrupted when John came back into the room, "I got to go to class hun. I'll see you tonight." he said then handed you Ryan.
"Aw, class so soon." you pouted then grabbed onto his shirt collar. John smirked then planted a big kiss on your lips.
"I'll make it all up to you when I get back." John whispered seductively.
"Ooh you sexy beast." you giggled.
John smiled then turned to Ryan, "I'll see you little booger later." he said then quickly kissed Ryan's forehead.
"Good luck on your exam!" you yelled as John began putting his sneakers on.
"Thanks. Love you!" he replied.
"Love you!" you quickly said before he shut the door.
>Present<
"Here you go, guys." you said as you put out three plates of pancakes, four for each of them.
"Thanks mom!" they all replied in unison. You noticed Bentley's personality change, he was a lot more open now. Probably because John wasn't around as much, he was able to be himself without being scared. He was finally spending more time with his brothers and less time with you. You didn't mind though, he seemed happy and that's all that matters. Besides, it left you more time to think about yourself and your future. You knew what you wanted, but you couldn't do it. John Cena is the perfect definition of an athlete, actor, father and husband all put into one... as people see it. If you got a divorce, John wouldn't look like such a family man after. John would never let you divorce him, he has too much ego. His reputation can't handle being divorced. Who was going to be arm candy at his world premieres? At Wrestlemania? Hall of Fame? You. You just had to keep pretending that your husband is the perfect guy that everybody sees him as.
There is no way out, the day John told you he scored a job in the WWE, you should have followed your instincts. You knew that the WWE wouldn't do any good for him. Even if you would have objected, John wouldn't have listened to you. He probably would have divorced you then if you didn't except his dream. Of course you were extremely proud of your husbands accomplishments, but you never wanted him to turn out the way he did. Why couldn't he be more like Randy or Paul (HHH)? Even though they might not seem like family men, they always put family before themselves or their career. Take Randy for example, when his wife was pregnant he demanded time off because he wanted to see every step and every minute of his little girl being born. John? Eh, he wasn't there fro Bentley's birth. Vince even gave him time off so he could be with you during the pregnancy, but John was too busy out drinking and partying to even care about his son's birth. Now lets talk about Paul, the second that he's given time off; he spends every minute and every second with his family. The second he gets off that plane, he runs to his house. Instead of that, the first thing that John does when he gets back is see Donna... then you and the kids. Oh you wished for the old John back.
The more you think about it, the more you seem wrong. No, it wasn't the WWE's fault that John change... it was John's fault and John's fault alone. There are other WWE Superstars that are out making movies and doing all that but they still have time for their families. Maybe all the fame and fortune just got to John's head and he started from there. When John's first movie, 'The Marine' came out, that's when the partying started. John's not a heavy drinker (anymore), he stopped when Ryan was born. But if you give him something big to celebrate, he'll damn well celebrate it. Oh but little did you know, that was only the beginning. When John's recent movie '12 Rounds' hit the theaters, he was never home. That movie changed John officially. Because when 12 Rounds came out, that's when everybody actually paid more attention to him. Interview after interview, signing after signing, party after party.
That's also when the cheating started. Donna saw how famous John was now and decided to make a move on him, which he gladly accepted. That cheating low-life. The more you keep thinking about the past, the more you want to leave. The- RING!
Your thoughts stopped by the annoying house phone, "Hello?"
"Hey, it's John."
"Okay. Why'd you call?"
"Just wanted to see how the kids were doing."
"They're good. Bentley's a lot happier."
"Really? That's good."
"Yeah, so how's the movie?"
"It's coming along great. Should be out around September."
"What's the name again?"
"'Legendary'"
"Oh yeah, cool."
"Uhuh, so how's Ally?"
"She's quiet. The pregnancy is actually really calming, compared to Este's. His was the most violent pregnancy I've ever had."
"Haha, maybe that's why he turned out so crazy."
"Yeah, the Wild Child."
"Mhm. So..."
"Do you want to talk to the boys?"
"Oh no it's okay, I'll let them play. I'll call again later and talk to them before bed time."
"Okay that's cool. So when do you think you're coming home?"
"In three months is the next time I get to come home."
"Do you think you'll be here for Ally's birth?"
"Definitely. I get some time off during your eighth month, Vince gave me off for three months so I can get all situated with Ally."
"Okay good. Don't miss out like you did with Bentley."
"I promise I won't."
"Okay. Well, I guess I'll go now."
"Okay, oh yeah and, um, Wrestlemania is coming up soon. Do you think you'll be able to come?"
"When is it? Like early April?"
"Yeah. Ally would probably be about a few weeks old by then."
"Okay that's cool, I'll just have the babysitter take care of her and me and the boys will go to see you."
"Great. Okay, well I'll talk to you later."
"Cool, bye."
"Bye."
Ryan's voice shocked you a little, snapping you out of thought. "Oh um, what do you guys want to eat?" you asked.
"Mom, your blueberry pancakes are the bombdiggity." Este laughed.
That put a smile on your face as you replied, "Blueberry pancakes coming up." As you were making the pancakes, this gave you a little more time to think. Flashbacks of breakfast with John appeared in your head.
>Flashback<
"Oh my gosh these are sexy pancakes." John laughed as he continued to pig out on your mother's recipe.
"Sexy pancakes for a sexy man." you laughed, cleaning up the dishes.
John burst out laughing then replied, "No pancake is sexier than my woman." You blushed then sat across from him at the table.
"WAHHH!" one year old little Ryan started crying as he banged his hands on the high chair. You sighed then began to get up but John stopped you.
"Don't worry babe, I got this." John said then lifted Ryan out of his high chair to change him. John was such a good father, and a good fiance. No man could ever be as good as John.
Your thoughts were interrupted when John came back into the room, "I got to go to class hun. I'll see you tonight." he said then handed you Ryan.
"Aw, class so soon." you pouted then grabbed onto his shirt collar. John smirked then planted a big kiss on your lips.
"I'll make it all up to you when I get back." John whispered seductively.
"Ooh you sexy beast." you giggled.
John smiled then turned to Ryan, "I'll see you little booger later." he said then quickly kissed Ryan's forehead.
"Good luck on your exam!" you yelled as John began putting his sneakers on.
"Thanks. Love you!" he replied.
"Love you!" you quickly said before he shut the door.
>Present<
"Here you go, guys." you said as you put out three plates of pancakes, four for each of them.
"Thanks mom!" they all replied in unison. You noticed Bentley's personality change, he was a lot more open now. Probably because John wasn't around as much, he was able to be himself without being scared. He was finally spending more time with his brothers and less time with you. You didn't mind though, he seemed happy and that's all that matters. Besides, it left you more time to think about yourself and your future. You knew what you wanted, but you couldn't do it. John Cena is the perfect definition of an athlete, actor, father and husband all put into one... as people see it. If you got a divorce, John wouldn't look like such a family man after. John would never let you divorce him, he has too much ego. His reputation can't handle being divorced. Who was going to be arm candy at his world premieres? At Wrestlemania? Hall of Fame? You. You just had to keep pretending that your husband is the perfect guy that everybody sees him as.
There is no way out, the day John told you he scored a job in the WWE, you should have followed your instincts. You knew that the WWE wouldn't do any good for him. Even if you would have objected, John wouldn't have listened to you. He probably would have divorced you then if you didn't except his dream. Of course you were extremely proud of your husbands accomplishments, but you never wanted him to turn out the way he did. Why couldn't he be more like Randy or Paul (HHH)? Even though they might not seem like family men, they always put family before themselves or their career. Take Randy for example, when his wife was pregnant he demanded time off because he wanted to see every step and every minute of his little girl being born. John? Eh, he wasn't there fro Bentley's birth. Vince even gave him time off so he could be with you during the pregnancy, but John was too busy out drinking and partying to even care about his son's birth. Now lets talk about Paul, the second that he's given time off; he spends every minute and every second with his family. The second he gets off that plane, he runs to his house. Instead of that, the first thing that John does when he gets back is see Donna... then you and the kids. Oh you wished for the old John back.
The more you think about it, the more you seem wrong. No, it wasn't the WWE's fault that John change... it was John's fault and John's fault alone. There are other WWE Superstars that are out making movies and doing all that but they still have time for their families. Maybe all the fame and fortune just got to John's head and he started from there. When John's first movie, 'The Marine' came out, that's when the partying started. John's not a heavy drinker (anymore), he stopped when Ryan was born. But if you give him something big to celebrate, he'll damn well celebrate it. Oh but little did you know, that was only the beginning. When John's recent movie '12 Rounds' hit the theaters, he was never home. That movie changed John officially. Because when 12 Rounds came out, that's when everybody actually paid more attention to him. Interview after interview, signing after signing, party after party.
That's also when the cheating started. Donna saw how famous John was now and decided to make a move on him, which he gladly accepted. That cheating low-life. The more you keep thinking about the past, the more you want to leave. The- RING!
Your thoughts stopped by the annoying house phone, "Hello?"
"Hey, it's John."
"Okay. Why'd you call?"
"Just wanted to see how the kids were doing."
"They're good. Bentley's a lot happier."
"Really? That's good."
"Yeah, so how's the movie?"
"It's coming along great. Should be out around September."
"What's the name again?"
"'Legendary'"
"Oh yeah, cool."
"Uhuh, so how's Ally?"
"She's quiet. The pregnancy is actually really calming, compared to Este's. His was the most violent pregnancy I've ever had."
"Haha, maybe that's why he turned out so crazy."
"Yeah, the Wild Child."
"Mhm. So..."
"Do you want to talk to the boys?"
"Oh no it's okay, I'll let them play. I'll call again later and talk to them before bed time."
"Okay that's cool. So when do you think you're coming home?"
"In three months is the next time I get to come home."
"Do you think you'll be here for Ally's birth?"
"Definitely. I get some time off during your eighth month, Vince gave me off for three months so I can get all situated with Ally."
"Okay good. Don't miss out like you did with Bentley."
"I promise I won't."
"Okay. Well, I guess I'll go now."
"Okay, oh yeah and, um, Wrestlemania is coming up soon. Do you think you'll be able to come?"
"When is it? Like early April?"
"Yeah. Ally would probably be about a few weeks old by then."
"Okay that's cool, I'll just have the babysitter take care of her and me and the boys will go to see you."
"Great. Okay, well I'll talk to you later."
"Cool, bye."
"Bye."