Status: Complete

Dreams of Someone

Commitment

Samantha Dawson

Lying there next to Jason, I never realized how much I needed him. He was so vital to me. And I didn't know how I went without him for so long. We were silent, and I could count the breaths he was taking - marking time once more. But this time, I didn't mind.

"Sam..." he breathed, so quiet that I could barely hear him. But I liked it when he spoke softly to me. It was... intimate. "What made you come back?"

I closed my eyes, inhaling his scent and the clean air around us. This was not the question I was dreading. I was safe. "I needed you."

"But you had Ryan..."

"I did. But I'm here with you now," I said. "Time cannot keep us apart."

A smile crept up on his lips as he turned to face me. "It's always about time, isn't it, Samantha?"

"Always," I said. I knew that he would always understand this. Unlike Ryan. But to think about him still twisted my heart; I could not deny that I loved him too.

At that moment, my phone vibrated, shattering the silence and the moment. I sat myself up and reached over to the nightstand. I had one new message. I opened it to find a very long, written out message from an unfamiliar number. But when I started to read, I somehow immediately knew that it was from Rachel.

Samantha -

I guess the dice have been thrown. You win. You get Jason. You get the happiness. Me? Ryan and I won't be back together anytime soon... I just couldn't stand trying that again. Too many memories. Too many things that couldn't be forgotten. And I couldn't handle that again. But just remember this before you go on with your wonderful life with the man I love:

I was there for Jason. And you weren't. I held him when he was sad. And I knew he was sad because he remembered you. So just hold on to that thought when you're lying next to him tonight.

And one more thing... just remember that time isn't always your friend. And commitment isn't always your enemy. It may help.

I hope you're happy with Jason. I know I was.

- Rachel Ellis


I reread the message at least ten times before closing it and setting my phone back down. I looked over at Jason, and I could see that he was confused; I never got upset over messages before this.

"What's wrong?" he asked me, as I laid back down next to him. I got comfortable and didn't answer him. He asked again. "What is it?"

"Just legal troubles," I said vaguely. I hated lying to him - especially after what I had already put him through. But Rachel's a lawyer; "legal" was a lawyer word, right?

An awkward silence followed. It was only broken by Jason's hesitant question. "Why did you leave?"

"Because..." I struggled with my words. "Because... be-because..."

"Tell me, Sam."

"I was afraid." I whispered it so softly that I could barely hear it myself. I hoped that he would not hear me. But whispers were familiar to both of us.

"What were you afraid of?" I could hear the anxiety in his voice.

"Not of you, Jason," I said, knowing exactly what he was thinking. I thought back to Rachel's message. "I guess I was afraid of... commitment."

"Oh..." he said. "Then we'll take it slow."

I shook my head. "I'm not afraid anymore."

"Are you sure?" He looked at me tenderly, and the guilt washed through me once more. I never should have hurt him that way.

"Yes."

I knew there were a million other things that I had to do, that I had to say. I had to help Rachel - this mess was my fault. I had to sort things out with Ryan. And other smaller, trivial things - design a room for a client, pay the electric bill, buy a present for my niece.

But for now, I was in Jason's arms. It was all that mattered to me; right here, right now.

I didn't even care as time ticked on.
♠ ♠ ♠
The end.

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