Status: I update when I can.
Speak Now
Numbers &+ You Know You Love Me
I weigh one hundred and nine pounds..
My weight never bothered me until now. I hate having to suck in my gut around my friends and having to wear one piece bathing suits to pool parties.
Thin people used to make me laugh. I always hated the idea of skinny jeans, and two piece bathing suits. It sounds funny but I used to love being chubby. I was nine, what could I say? And what bothers me the most is my parents. They both lost one hundred pounds, I feel as if I need to live up to that. Could it happen? Probably not.
I want to weigh ninety-five pounds by time I start seventh grade, September first. Well, at least one hundred.
The numbers on the scale mean so much more to me than...well...just numbers. It reminds me of how many cookies I've eaten, or how I shouldn't have ordered large fries at the pizza place with my friends. I want those numbers to say, in bright, flashing, neon red digits, "100.0". I want it so badly.
****
Nick and me broke up, obviously. Lately, for both of us I guess, people have swarmed in to ask us out. Nick has given into the temptation, while I know he still lets his mind wander to me. I, however, am waiting for two people. One of them being Nick.
If Nick were to ask me out again, I'd probably say yes. Because that's just how fucking stupid I am. But I'd also want him to ask me out again so I could be able to say no.
The other person I'm waiting for is Andre. If you read my most recent one-shot you'll hear the whole hallaleujah on how he kissed me and all that jazz on the first night of summer (read it if you want to know more, this isn't the place to discuss it.), but nothing more ever happened since then. I mean sure, we've texted and we even met up once so I could bring him some Laffy Taffy. But other than that...I'm not sure.
My weight never bothered me until now. I hate having to suck in my gut around my friends and having to wear one piece bathing suits to pool parties.
Thin people used to make me laugh. I always hated the idea of skinny jeans, and two piece bathing suits. It sounds funny but I used to love being chubby. I was nine, what could I say? And what bothers me the most is my parents. They both lost one hundred pounds, I feel as if I need to live up to that. Could it happen? Probably not.
I want to weigh ninety-five pounds by time I start seventh grade, September first. Well, at least one hundred.
The numbers on the scale mean so much more to me than...well...just numbers. It reminds me of how many cookies I've eaten, or how I shouldn't have ordered large fries at the pizza place with my friends. I want those numbers to say, in bright, flashing, neon red digits, "100.0". I want it so badly.
****
Nick and me broke up, obviously. Lately, for both of us I guess, people have swarmed in to ask us out. Nick has given into the temptation, while I know he still lets his mind wander to me. I, however, am waiting for two people. One of them being Nick.
If Nick were to ask me out again, I'd probably say yes. Because that's just how fucking stupid I am. But I'd also want him to ask me out again so I could be able to say no.
The other person I'm waiting for is Andre. If you read my most recent one-shot you'll hear the whole hallaleujah on how he kissed me and all that jazz on the first night of summer (read it if you want to know more, this isn't the place to discuss it.), but nothing more ever happened since then. I mean sure, we've texted and we even met up once so I could bring him some Laffy Taffy. But other than that...I'm not sure.
♠ ♠ ♠
I'm just not sure if anyone reads these author's notes or even my story. But if you do, comment. Just to let me know you're here.