The Lover and The Liar

They had been drunk. They were so excited about the big dance at school. They were dressed in semi- matching suits, looking great for their girlfriends. They danced for a bit, and then they had escaped to the gym to have a couple of sips of wine. It was only a kiss. Just...one simple kiss. Ages ago. It was Curtis' fault. He had to say the things he said. It wasn't just his intoxication talking, and Oliver knew that. He knew.

"You, Oli. You're more than my best mate." Curtis was stuttering and stumbling. He had put his hands on Oliver's face. "You're my...my brother. And, I love you. I love you, Oliver." Oliver stood still, millimeters away from his 'brother.' The true love he had in his heart for Curtis was let out; with a kiss. Curtis was confused, and his head was dizzy. He didn't exactly kiss back, and although the kiss lasted a mere ten seconds, he was quick to push Oli away from him.

Oliver loved Curtis. That's how he knew he was...'that way'. He always questioned it, even when he had a serious relationship with his ex girlfriend. He had sex with her. More than once. But he knew what did it for him and... even as he saw how gorgeous Hannah was, she was not what he needed. Curtis though...Curtis was the One. The only one for Oliver.

But that kiss? That was a long time ago. Since then Curtis had deserted Oliver. His best mate. The only true mate he'd ever had. He beat the shit out of him in gym class- in front of all of his 'mates.' He punched Oli- really hurt him. Made him bleed. Called him every name in the book. Queer, fairy, faggot. Oli fought back. He stuck up for himself and told Curtis to fuck off.

Curtis beating Oliver was symbolic for himself. He wasn't beating his mate out of disgust. His punches to Oliver’s' face was reassurance that he wasn't gay. He hit him and thought, 'I don't care. So that means I'm not gay.' Those were only thoughts. Because even though Oliver would never believe him; he cared.

Things had been off with them for a while. Eventually Oliver met somebody and he really liked him. A lot. They connected in a way that was just not describable. Oliver felt drawn to Parker, and he finally felt like he could be happy. Parker was sweet, funny, charming, understanding. Everything Oliver dreamed of. Parker knew Oli had never been in a relationship with a boy before, but that was okay with him. They were both happy knowing they had each other for company and security.

Curtis and Oliver have been trying to set things straight but they just couldn't. There was so much tension. So much anger on Curtis' account. They tried to double date but every time Parker kissed Oliver Curtis made this...this face of complete disgust. Oliver couldn't stand it. They'd been better off than before, but not by much.

The doorbell rings unexpectedly, and Oliver runs down the stairs.

"I'm comin' just a minute!" his thick British accent echoes in the hallway.

He opens the door to find...Curtis. He tries so hard to pretend like he's not hurt to see his mate standing in his doorway.

"Curtis...hi. Um, what are you doin' here?"

Curtis refuses to make direct eye contact. "Can I come in?" He looks at the ground.

"Yeah, of course." Oli is sure to mask his emotions. "I thought you were in an exam?"

Curtis makes his way into Oliver’s house, facing his back towards Oliver. "Are you on your own?"

Oliver shakes his head, confused. "Yeah, why?"

Curtis doesn't respond. "What?" Oliver asks.

"Have you got a drink or something?" Curtis asks, distantly.

"A drink drink?"

"Yeah."

"We've got some wine..."

"That'll do."

Curtis makes his way into Oliver's kitchen, Oli following him. He gets out two glasses and pours them each the same amount.

"So. Are you seeing Parker tonight?" Curtis asks so vaguely. So nonchalantly. Like he cares.

"Probably. I don't know." Oliver is trying to keep his guard up, not letting Curtis in on anything. Why does he deserve to know anything? Especially now? Especially after the way he treated him? No- Oli thinks. No way.

Curtis takes a sip of wine.

"So you two are just keepin' it casual, eh?"

Oliver sips his own wine. "I am seeing him. Yeah." Curtis nods, slightly speechless. "I keep it simple because...I know you'll say somethin' mean about it."

Curtis turns around to face Oliver. "Why would I do that?"

Oliver almost laughs in his drink. "You tell me."

"Well. Well maybe. Maybe because he's arrogant- and his ego-"

Oliver shakes his head. "That's not what I had in mind."

"Then what did you have in mind?" Curtis' tone is getting threatening quickly. Oliver doesn't like it.

"You're not being fair, Curtis. I'm gettin' on with my life."

Curtis walks towards him. "Well whose stoppin' you?"

"Parker reckons you and I can't be mates anymore." Oliver says, as much as it hurts him. Even after all they've been through, after all the words, and hate, and violence...Oliver never wanted to stop being best mates with Curtis. "Because of how much I liked you."

Oliver had told Curtis he was in love with him after he fell out with Hannah. He couldn't hurt anymore.
He had to tell him. The next day Curtis pretended he never heard it.

"He's- he's just sayin' that-"

"That's what I thought. But. You've been pretty off with me."

Curtis is getting visibly upset, he's beginning to sweat. "No- no, maybe I've been off with your boyfriend. But not with you."

"Why don't we start off with that then, why are you off with Parker?"

"I don't like him." Curtis laughs bitterly. "Everyone thinks he's so nice."

"Including me."

"Well maybe my taste is a bit more sophisticated then that."

Oliver crosses his arms. "Then what is your taste?"

"What?"

"Well I think you've made it clear. What your taste is. When you beat me up."

"That was ages ago...we- we're mates now." Curtis tries to point out, advancing on his friend.

Oliver laughs. "Mates don't get jealous over boyfriends."

"Jealous?"

"Yeah, jealous." Oliver replies venomously.

Curtis' light chocolate eyes begin to water. His lip quivers. He takes a shaky deep breath, looking everywhere but in Oliver's direction.

"T-Tell me your not?" Oli asks rather than states.

Curtis' feelings change in seconds. He can't seem to keep his cool. At all. He's shaking; he's trying so hard not to break down.

"You- you fancied me. When...when did you stop?"

"What?" Oliver can't control his emotions either. He's more confused then he's ever been.

"When did you get over me? How...how can you make yourself stop loving someone? You said you loved me."

Oliver leans his back against his kitchen sink, baffled. "I did. I-" his voice gets low. "I do."

Curtis steps closer to Oliver, face contorted with different feelings.

"Why are you doing this, Curtis, eh? You're makin' fun of me? You teasin' me? What I-"

He runs his hands through his hair and pulls. He's visibly sweating. Visibly upset.

"Have you and Parker..." he can't even bring himself to say it.

"What?"

"You know." Curtis bites his lip.

"Yeah." Oliver nods slowly.

"D-Didn't it feel wrong?"

Oliver shakes his head and accidentally smiles. "No. It...it felt wonderful."

He wasn't quick to sleep with Parker. He avoided it for a long time. But when he thought the timing was right...he had taken Parker's hand, led him to his room, and...and he had let him take his virginity.

Curtis steps even closer, hands fidgeting with his face, his hair. "Do you love him?"

Oliver's lip shakes. "Not as much as I love you."

Curtis finally begins to cry, holding onto Oliver's jacket. "I can't stop thinking about you."

Oliver shakes his head. "Curtis- don't."

But he does. He cries harder. "I want you-" he desperately crashes his lips to Oliver's, sobbing into their kiss. Neither one of them can think straight with their emotions getting in the way. All Curtis knows is he's never wanted anybody more then he wants Oliver right now. Hitting him killed him. Hurting him killed him. Being cold to him killed him. But not being this close to him has taken the worst toll on his heart. Heartbreak he never imagined.

Their minds and legs lead them up to Oliver's room in moments, Oliver breaking their embrace to ask, "Are you sure?"

Curtis says nothing. He nods and kisses his lover again. They peel each others clothes off in a hurried manner. They want this to be quick. They both need this so bad. They've wanted this- for so, so long and...they are not waiting any longer.

Curtis holds Oli's hands the whole time. He kisses him; pays attention to what makes him feel good, what he likes, and how he likes it.

He makes sure Oliver comes first. He holds him afterwards, tight in his arms. He cries. He cries for Oliver, for what he put him through.

And then they fall asleep.

But when they wake up, it's totally different.

Oliver opens his eyes to realize his arms around his lover. Curtis is awake. Still. Frozen almost.

"I've dreamt about that for a long time." Oliver confesses, playing with the soft duvet.

Curtis rises up and ignores Oliver, getting out of bed and immediately pulling on his jeans.

"You don't have to rush off so quickly, nobody is gonna be back for ages." Oliver says, reaching out to stop Curtis.

Curtis pries Oli's hands off of him.

"Get. Off. Of. Me." he buttons himself up and grabs the rest of his clothes. "Faggot." He storms out of Oliver's room in a much needed hurry.

Oliver cries, alone and naked on his mattress. He cries because he still loves Curtis- and he will continue to love Curtis.

And Curtis cries, alone outside. He cries because he's lying to himself.

As the lover still loves; the liar? The liar will still lie.