Walking on Thread
3.
The once bright hair of hers was now a dull, ugly red color; the dirt from where she had been sleeping on God knows what was in a thick layer over it. It ran wild and was bushy, the fact that she hadn't washed it in ages was a dead give away.
But Kazz didn't care. The struggle she faced throughout that day, she didn't care about either. She didn't really care about much of anything anymore. There was no need to. From the alleyway that she slept in some nights, to the track marks running up her arms, she always felt safe.
It's not like anyone would find any good within her. She'd be just a good fuck then a toss to the side. It's how she survives. Barely.
Most people would wish that it had never of come to this, that they were still at home with their uncaring mum and missing half the family they hadn't seen in ages. But no, Kazz didn't wish for that. For she thought that this life was far better than that life.
She had chose this life for herself, and no one else had done anything to influence that. To her, this was something she had been waiting for all her life. To be free of everyone else's watchful eye. She was sick of it all, but now, she wasn't.
There was no more watchful eyes that she had to see. Only the judging eyes of the people passing. But like any of them meant anything to her.
But all her life, Kazz had been judged. Whether the judging was good or bad, she didn't know. But there was never a time in her life where the people she knew were all happy at her. And she always used to feel like it was her fault and she needed to change.
And now, this was her way of saying 'screw you world' because she didn't care any more. She finally didn't care, and this was where it landed her.
On the street, addicted to her precious drugs, and, funnily enough, which no one would ever think, happy.
And that's all she could have wished for. Happiness.
But no one would think, laying on the alley floor, that this girl was happy. But she was, she was smiling inside. No matter how harsh it was.
The daunting scarring of her mind made her happy, and that's all she could think about as the sun rose. Her happiness.
But Kazz didn't care. The struggle she faced throughout that day, she didn't care about either. She didn't really care about much of anything anymore. There was no need to. From the alleyway that she slept in some nights, to the track marks running up her arms, she always felt safe.
It's not like anyone would find any good within her. She'd be just a good fuck then a toss to the side. It's how she survives. Barely.
Most people would wish that it had never of come to this, that they were still at home with their uncaring mum and missing half the family they hadn't seen in ages. But no, Kazz didn't wish for that. For she thought that this life was far better than that life.
She had chose this life for herself, and no one else had done anything to influence that. To her, this was something she had been waiting for all her life. To be free of everyone else's watchful eye. She was sick of it all, but now, she wasn't.
There was no more watchful eyes that she had to see. Only the judging eyes of the people passing. But like any of them meant anything to her.
But all her life, Kazz had been judged. Whether the judging was good or bad, she didn't know. But there was never a time in her life where the people she knew were all happy at her. And she always used to feel like it was her fault and she needed to change.
And now, this was her way of saying 'screw you world' because she didn't care any more. She finally didn't care, and this was where it landed her.
On the street, addicted to her precious drugs, and, funnily enough, which no one would ever think, happy.
And that's all she could have wished for. Happiness.
But no one would think, laying on the alley floor, that this girl was happy. But she was, she was smiling inside. No matter how harsh it was.
The daunting scarring of her mind made her happy, and that's all she could think about as the sun rose. Her happiness.
♠ ♠ ♠
Just over two months, but to be fair, I never knew it was my turn. Totally forgot about this. Oh well, it's up, and it's crap xD