The Heart Never Lies

“Daniel.” I braced myself for what he was going to say. I took a quick glance at his appearance. Damn, he looked fine. I shook my head. What the hell am I saying?! Fucking hell.

“Hey Hayden, can I come in?” I gave him a slight nod and went in my room signaling him to follow me. I sat on the computer chair while he sat on my bed. We sat there in silence.

“So you have something to talk about?” I started. I have a feeling I know what it is but let’s see where this goes. He shifted his position on the bed making himself more comfortable.
“Well we were interrupted before and I just wanted a proper talk of...” He started playing with his fingers and looked everywhere but me. I sighed and decided to carry on the topic. Of course my heart aches. I’m a girl, I get hurt, and we have these uncontrollable hormones. Ugh, sometimes I hate being a girl.

“You mean that thing that happened last night?” His face reddened. I don’t understand why he’s embarrassed. He told me it was a mistake right? I sat there motionless. I didn’t know how to describe my feelings. I don’t know if I’m sad or relieved that he thought it was a mistake.

“Yes, I think that we should talk about it.” I stared at him cueing him to go on. “W-well the thing is that kiss was-“

“Look,” I interrupted. This was it. I couldn’t take it anymore. “I know it was a mistake. I was drunk, okay?” His face looked shocked with a mix of disappointment. Then it twisted into a face of determination.

“You kissed me.”

“I was drunk!” I argued back.

“I kissed back.” I flinched slightly and gained my composure. “Hayden, I know that you weren’t drunk. I just know it. “

“And how the hell would you know that?” I began questioning myself. I had a lot of Corona that night but I don’t get drunk that easily. UGH, I just don’t know anymore!

“I know you.” My face twisted into a face full of anger and hurt.

“No Daniel, you don’t.”

“Oh my God, Hayden. Would you just shut the fuck up and let me explain for one minute?!” I heard a loud explosion in my heart. My eyes started to water.

“You have no right to tell me that Daniel!” I stood up and shouted, my tears starting to flow down.

“Yes, I do! I deserve at least one minute to tell you what the fuck happened between us.” He stood up abruptly facing me completely. His face was completely serious. This was it. This is his last chance.

“Fine. One minute. That’s all you get.”

He took a few steps closer and looked me in the eye.

“Do you remember that time when Rafe and the other guys moved in?” I gave him a nod.
“They were my escape from you.” Those words hit me like a ton of bricks. “I had this feeling inside me that I couldn’t control. Every time I see you my heart aches and I have no idea why!” This is… “God, we were like 10 back then! I was feeling confused and I wanted that feeling to stop.” He continued. “I wanted to be as far from you as possible because I was scared. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that.” This is too much. “I’m sorry and I lo-“

“One minute is up. Get out.” My tears continued to flow down. I knew he was hurt. I know that I’m selfish. But I just… “Daniel. Get out now!” I screamed. I watched him walk away until the door closed.

I’m a pathetic coward.