Just Another Lovesick Boy

The morning was rather awkward. More than rather awkward. Never in my life had I ever had a more awkward morning. We all sat together at the dining room table, eating our breakfast. It felt odd eating there considering we only used the dining room for formal occasions. But there we were, eating cereal or oatmeal out of our bowls. The tension between the adults was thick. Jack kept shooting my mom looks, which she pointedly ignored. Jack’s woman would often stare mindlessly at random objects, which greatly confused me. I tried to ignore Eddy, who continually flicked pieces of his cereal at my head, while I studied Jack and his woman. I paused as I was raising the spoon to my mouth when I realized that the woman was staring at me and Eddy as intently as I was staring at her.

“Aren’t you two boys supposed to be in school?” she asked.

Before Eddy and I could turn towards each other with incredulous looks, Jack lowered his spoon and placed his hand over hers. He leaned over and quietly said, “Darling, it’s Saturday.”

“Is it?” she asked in a surprised tone.

“Yes. I told you that this morning.”

“Oh. Must have forgotten,” she laughed before taking a small bite of her oatmeal.

I glanced over at my mother from the corner of my eye. She was staring at the woman curiously before smiling into her cup of lemon tea. I had no idea what was with the lady. She seemed totally off in so many ways. I could not get a fix on her and it bothered me. I could not believe she was the kind of woman Jack would settle for. But I realized that I did not care because she was the woman that would keep Jack away from us. I did not say anything about what she said but Eddy couldn’t resist.

“There’s something seriously wrong with you, lady,” he said before popping a cereal piece into his mouth.

Before Jack could retort with a glare, the woman smiled and said, “My name isn’t ‘lady.’ It’s Cecilia. You can call me CeeCee, if you like.”

“Yeah, no,” he grinned.

“Boys, you’re finished. Clean up,” my mom said as she put her cup down.

Eddy grinned at me before he pushed his chair back and stood up while picking up his bowl. I followed him into the kitchen and washed my bowl along with Eddy. We placed our bowls into the cupboard after drying them. I walked back to the dining room to make my way to the living room but was stopped by my mother.

“Adrian, aren’t you going to get ready?”

“Sure. But what for?” I asked.

“Your father’s wedding is in two months. There are so many things that need to be prepared. We need to get the tuxedos and the dress as soon as possible. So go on.”

I blinked once before gesturing to Eddy to follow me up to my room. He crossed one arm over his chest and lifted the hand of his other arm to his mouth to chew lightly on his thumbnail. We turned the corner outside the dining room to go up the stairs. I stopped on the third stair and gestured to Eddy to stay quiet. I silently went down the stairs and leaned against the wall to listen in on their conversation. I tilted my head back while Eddy leaned his head on my shoulder and waited for them to begin speaking. It only took a few moments before the woman spoke up.

“His friend is quite the rude one,” she said simply.

“I think they both have reason to be,” my mother said.

“Which is?”

“For Eddy, the man who flirted with his mother and almost ended a marriage is suddenly back in his best friend’s life. For my son, his father came back to see him after a decade with a strange woman who seems to act more ignorant than what she is.”

“Adrian just states things for how he perceives them. He doesn’t mean to be rude.”

“And you would know? You only raised the boy for six years.”

“He was like that even then. He got that from you.”

“I’d rather he be blunt than be a liar.”

“Yeah, well, what the hell is wrong with him?” Jack asked.

“Excuse me?”

“There’s something wrong with him.”

“With Eddy as his best friend, there could be a plethora of things wrong with my son. You’ll have to specify.” I gave a grin as Eddy let out a small snort of laughter.

“His hair is blue.”

“Oh, darling, you act like kids don’t do that now. Besides, it was barely a tint,” his woman spoke up in an airy voice.

“I don’t care how kids do it. I care if my kid does it.”

“He doesn’t do it. Besides Eddy, Adrian is relatively normal.”

"I thought I taught him better than that. Dying his hair blue and painting his nails blue? Honestly," Jack scoffed.

I felt my back get tense and my fists ball up as I thought about it. I felt Eddy's cold hands smooth out the wrinkle that arrived on my forehead. I let out a small sigh at his touch before I attempted to relax.

"Oh please, Jack, you barely raised him. But anyway, there was an incident with a few kids from his school."

"What happened?"

"That's not my story to tell."

"Jocelyn, I have the right to know what happened to my son."

"It's Adrian's business, not mine. If you want to know what happened so badly, you should ask him yourself. Not that he would tell you anyway," my mom said.

“Fine. I’ll go try now,” he said as I heard the chair scrape back. “I won’t have my son be some fairy faggot.”

“Sit down,” I heard two voices speak up as Eddy quickly grasped my wrist.

“Jack, you did not do anything to help raise my child. Think twice before saying that. And I don’t have to help you with this wedding, nor do I have to let you into my home. Never use that language in my house again, especially about my son.”

“And Jack, you know how I feel about that word. Say it again and you’ll find yourself sleeping outside.”

I glanced at Eddy, who looked impressed with the lady’s words. The dining room went silent after she spoke before I heard the sound of the chair scooting back into place. I closed my eyes for a brief moment before I felt Eddy slip his head into mine. I opened my eyes and looked to my right to see Eddy looking down at me with serious eyes. I slipped my other hand around his waist to turn him around and walk up the stairs. We made our way to my room before quietly closing the door. I walked over to my wardrobe to find clothes as Eddy sat on my bed.

“You okay, dude?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I laughed. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“He’s back. He has some weird ass fiancée with him. Your mom is acting like nothing is wrong. They brought up the incident. And you’re lying to me.”

“And how would you know?” I asked as I pulled out a pair of blue jeans and kicked the drawer shut before opening the one above it.

“Because you’re my best friend.”

“I’m okay, Eddy, really. It’s just that I’ve lived almost my entire life without a dad. I don’t need one now. Especially one who wants to know all of my business,” I said as I rummaged through all of my shirts.

Eddy stood up from my bed before standing up to walk towards me. He went through my shirts for a few seconds before pulling out a green shirt and handing it to me. I sighed as I took it away from him.

“I know you really liked her. And I know you’re upset about this thing with your dad. But you need to realize that this will only make you stronger.”

“I guess,” I mumbled before we went silent as I pulled out socks and a pair of boxers from the top drawer.

“What the hell did they put in that paint? How are you still blue?” he asked randomly.

“Fuck if I know. I’m going to try to get it off again.”

“Good luck,” he smiled before I nodded and walked away to go into the bathroom across the hall.

I sighed as I slowly took off my clothes after I turned on the water in the shower. I stood there in silence with one hand in the water, waiting until it reached the right temperature. I licked my lips before I walked into the shower stall. I shut my tired eyes as I took in the feeling of the warm water falling onto my head and shoulders. I sighed as I reached up to grab the bottle of shampoo that was sitting on the shower shelf. I poured a ball of shampoo onto my left hand before I rubbed it all into my hair. I scrubbed ferociously at my hair until I felt my scalp sting from the scratches and soap. I dunked my head into the water before I scrubbed my body clean. After a few moments, I walked out of the shower, dripping wet. I wrapped the dark green towel around my waist as I used another blue tainted towel to dry my hair. I sighed at my reflection once I realized there was still a faint blue tint to my hair. I shook my head once before I continued to dry myself off and pull my clothes on. I lowered my eyes down to the floor and walked to my room to pull on a pair of green Converse. I tied a green hand-woven bracelet around my left wrist after I rolled the sleeves of my shirt up to my elbows. I turned on my heel to walk down the stairs and through the living room. I felt all their eyes on my form as I walked through and back into the kitchen. I sat down at the kitchen table as watched Eddy scrub clean a dark red plate at the sink. He rubbed the plate dry with another towel and put it back in its cupboard before drying his hands and turning towards me.

"So I see you have failed once again to get the blue out," he stated.

"Pretty much."

"Would you like an epic with that fail?" he laughed.

"Shut up."

"Adrian, are you ready to leave now?" my mother asked from the doorway.

"Yeah, mom," I nodded as I stood.

"Eddy, would you like to come with us?"

"No thanks, Mama D. I really should go distract Free. She thinks she knows how to plant flowers again," Eddy laughed before walking out.

Once Eddy had left, my mother had turned towards all of us and smiled. "Shall we go now? I have a dear friend who owns a store that sells near anything for formal occasions."

"Mom, can we go in separate cars?" I asked quietly.

"Sure, honey. That's what we were going to do anyway. Just follow me to the store, guys, and we'll decide on things there."

Once we were there, I immediately felt awkward. Even with my button up shirt, I felt underdressed in the store that was filled with male employees that were wearing nice suits. My mother smiled down at me as Jack and Cecilia walked in behind us while holding hands.

"Jocelyn!" a voice exclaimed.

"Henry, darling!" my mother smiled as she joined hands with a tall man. They kissed each other's cheeks in greeting.

"What brings you here on this fine day?" the man called Henry smiled.

"My son is going to attend his father's wedding in two months and he needs a tuxedo, Henry," my mother explained as she put a hand on my shoulder.

"His father?" Henry asked.

"It was quite the shock but I couldn't say no," my mother said lowly.

"Oh, Jocelyn, always the nice one."

"Of course," my mom smiled.

"Well, moving on. What have you planned so far?" Henry asked Jack and Cecilia after they introduced themselves.

“They reserved a place in the mountains for the ceremony and reception and they sent out invitations,” my mom answered.

“And?” Henry asked expectantly.

“That’s it,” my mom nodded.

“Egad, woman. You’re going to have your plate full with this one. You sure you can do it?” Henry asked my mom, nudging her with his elbow.

“Henry, please,” mom scoffed as she crossed her arms, “I can do anything.”

“That’s the spirit, Jocelyn! Has the lovely couple picked out a color scheme?” Henry turned towards Jack and his woman.

"Jack and I agreed on pastel green and brown," Cecilia spoke up.

“Lovely spring colors,” Henry nodded.

"Cecilia wanted my groomsmen and me to have black tuxes with green ties," Jack said. “What did you say you wanted for me?”

“A patterned tie. To differentiate you,” Cecilia answered.

“Sweetheart, I’ll be the one saying ‘I do.’ I think that will differentiate me enough.”

“Let me have fun, party pooper,” she pouted. “But anyway, I wanted the bridesmaids with dresses of a similar color green with brown sashes.”

"Excellent. Would you like us to assist you first, sir, and then Adrian or would you like one of my employees to help him while we're busy with you?"

"Son, what would you like?" Jack asked me.

"It's Adrian, and I'd prefer it somebody helped me," I said softly.

"And I will go help Cecilia pick out bridesmaid dresses and a wedding dress on the other side of the store," my mom smiled.

I nodded as both of the women walked away side by side to the other side of the store where all the wedding and bridesmaid dresses were placed. I sighed softly when I realized I was left with two strangers by my side. Henry smiled at both of us before clapping his hands loudly once.

"Well, Adrian, let's find you someone who knows their way around a suit as well as I do," he smiled before looking around. "Aha! There we go, nobody does it better than my daughter. Darling, would you come here please?"

I scuffed my shoes against the floor with my hands in my pocket. I saw a pair of black heels join our circle and heard Jack let out a low chuckle that I was sure I only heard. I licked my lips once before I looked up to see who joined us. My eyes widen at the figure who was staring at me. I took in the fitted white button up shirt and the blue knee length skirt she was wearing. Her hair was pulled back into a bun but there were still some piece falling out. I caught sight of a small golden chain hanging around her neck. She gave me a small smile before turning to her father.

"Yes, dad?" she asked.

"Nara, sweetie, would you please help Adrian find a suit while I find Mr. Alcott one?"

"Absolutely. This way, Adrian," Nara Lee smiled at me before gesturing me to follow her.

I followed behind her meekly to a section of slim fitting suits. I looked around at all the sizes and colors and wondered how this would ever get done. Nara Lee turned around to face me with her hand resting on a rack of suits. I rubbed the back of my head uncomfortably.

"So what colors are you looking for? We have brown, blue, gray, and black. What's your preference?" she asked.

"What color is typical for a wedding? Though Jack has a preference for black. He said something about light green for the tie or something," I explained.

"Light green would look better with a black suit. Would you like a two button, three buttons, double breasted, side vented, or a four button suit? Then we have to look a plain suits, pinstriped suits, and shoes."

"You know that just went right over my head right?" I asked seriously.

"Do you just want to leave me in charge of this?" she laughed. “Fortunately for you, I overheard what Mr. Alcott and his fiancée talking about it briefly when they came in.”

"You have total creative freedom here."

"Okay, one last question. For now, anyway."

"Yeah?"

"Do you want it slim fitted or loose?"

"I don't know. Slim, I guess."

"Do you know your measurements or do you want me to find out?"

"What?" I choked out.

"You know, measure you. You stand on the stool with your arms out and I measure the length of your arms, waist, chest, and legs," she explained.

"Oh, right," I nodded. "Probably measure."

She laughed once before guiding me over to stool to stand on before turning away to grab measuring tape. She instructed me to hold my arms out before measuring the length. I bit my lip when I noticed exactly how close she was to me. I stared down at her golden hair when she leaned down to measure the length of my legs. I felt my heart beat faster and my breath catch in my throat when she wrapped her arms around me to measure the size of my chest. It took all that I had to not grab her and kiss her.

"You know, Adrian," she began softly as she was measuring my waist, "I never meant to hurt you. I promise you, I did not know Cassie would do that. I've been trying to get her to apologize for weeks now."

"But it still happened."

"And I'm sorry that it did. You have no idea how mad at her I was."

“You smiled.”

"You have to understand, Adrian, I don’t really know how to express how I feel very well. I smile when I’m scared or nervous, I can’t help it. I really didn’t know they would do that to you. I'd really like another chance to get to know you, if you let me."

"I'd like that," I smiled.

She grinned up at me before wrapping her arms around me. This time, she was not measuring me. I took in her sweet scent of strawberries and vanilla as I gave her a small and awkward hug back. She finally pulled away to look up at me.

"Well, now that that's out of the way and we're friends now, we can get serious about this suit business," she smiled as she put her hands on her hips.

I followed her over to a rack of black suits that had a rainbow stack of dress shirts opposite to it. She started flipping through all the suits before finally choosing one and folding it over her arm. She turned around to gaze over all the different colors of green on the wall.

"So I picked out a two button suit for you. Do you know if they wanted a white shirt with a green tie?" she asked as she stared at the ties.

“Pretty sure they wanted a white shirt,” I shrugged.

“That’s easy. What shade of green did they want?”

"She said something about spring green.”

"Like apple green or clover or sea foam?" she turned to ask me.

I blinked at her once before saying uncertainly, "Apple?"

"Sounds cool. And if not, we can just switch later. Do you want to wear a vest or a cummerbund?"

"Vest.”

"I'd throw a shoe at you if you said otherwise," she smiled before handing me all the clothes.

I took them away from her as I walked over to the dressing room. After I pulled on the suit and folded my regular clothes on a chair in the room, I walked out, straightening my sleeves as I walked. I looked around for Nara Lee, only to find her missing and my father in her place, already dressed in his suit. He was grinning over his shoulder at Nara Lee, who was standing on the tips of her toes, attempting to grab a pair of shoes off a wall on the other side of the store. He turned with a smirk on his face as he walked towards me with his hands in his pockets.

"What a mess that girl is. That skirt has to be beyond a hand me down. This store must not be doing so well if her daddy can't afford to buy his kid some clothes. She looks beyond cheap," he scoffed.

"Nara Lee likes vintage clothes. She shops at thrift stores on purpose," I explained with no tone in my voice.

"On first name basis, are we? That's rich. You could do way better than that, Adrian."

"What do you mean?"

"Didn't you notice the lovey dovey eyes she was giving you? Don't act stupid, son. That's the woman's job. And that Nora girl looks like the typical example of stupidity," he laughed.

I joined eyes with Nara, who happened to be just behind my dad, with shoes in her hands. Her smile faltered slightly when she heard my father say that. I saw her bit her lip slightly as she looked down. She looked up at me from behind her eyelashes.

I turned back to Jack. "Her name is Nara Lee. Get it right. And if you want me to do this stupid wedding, you better get your act straight and prove you've changed. Otherwise, I don't ever want to see you again."

He raised his eyebrows at me before turning around to walk away. He froze at the sight of Nara Lee, who was standing there defiantly. She looked at him up and down before walking past him coolly to stand next to me with a large smile on her face.

"Well, don't you just clean up nice? I found some shoes for you. I hope I got the right size," she said as I leaned down to take off my own shoes.

"I'm sorry about him," I said softly as I tied the shoes she gave me.

"Was that your dad?"

"He's not my dad. He's just the guy whose disgusting sperm I was spawned from," I said as I blew my hair out of my eyes.

"That's a shame. But hey, at least you're not like him," she said.

"I guess that's true," I smiled down at her. I stared into her light blue eyes. I took in her features. I had not been this close to her in a long time. There a small lock of curly blonde hair that had fallen out of her bun and into her face. I felt the strong urge to push it back and behind her ear. I was about to do so when something stopped me.

"Adrian, sweetie, can you come over here, please?" my mom asked.

Nara Lee and I jumped back to look over at my mother. She was standing there in a flowing knee length green dress that had a small brown ribbon going around the waist. Her dark hair was pulled back into a low ponytail and she was wearing silver heels. She must have been modeling some bridesmaid dresses on for Cecilia. I smiled over at her before nodding at Nara Lee to follow my mom to a small room on the other side of the store. It was in that room when my eyebrows rose and my jaw dropped. There stood plain Cecilia looking more beautiful than ever. Her wedding dress looked like something out of a fairy tale, with the way it glowed in the fake lighting in the room. I saw her white shoes peek out from under her dress as she stared at herself in the three-way mirror. She was staring at herself in shock, her diamond ring sparkling as she held her hand to her chest. She noticed me in the mirror and smiled at my reflection before turning around to face me.

"Cecilia wanted to know what her future step-son thought of her dress," my mom said.

"I think Jack doesn't deserve you," I told Cecilia seriously once my eyes connected with hers.

She smiled at me before looking down at her dress to smooth it out. "I've never had anything nice like this before. Before Jack, anyway. I don't want to sound like I'm with him for money because I'm not. But I'm just glad I found a man that cares for me in so many ways. He's not the best of men. He flirts with other women and he says harsh things. But when it's just us, he's as sweet as can be."

"I hope you're right," I nodded.

"This will be the best wedding ever, Adrian. I can't wait to call you my step-son," she smiled as she walked over to take my hands in hers.

She patted my cheek before turning to my mother to hug her. "This is the first store I went to and I already found my dream dress. You are a miracle worker."

They continued to talk to each other for a few minutes. When I realized I was no longer needed in the room, I turned around to walk out of the room in a daze. I was walking to the dressing room, rubbing the back of my head awkwardly, to change out of the suit when I froze with my normal clothes in my arms to see Jack leaning against the wall with his head tilted back. He looked over to me quickly with a look in his eye I had never seen before. He had a panicked yet excited look on his face.

"How does she look?" he asked me softly.

I stared at him for a moment. Even as a child, when we were supposed to be happy together, I never really liked my father. He was always rude or making moves on Eddy's mom. But then there were those very rare moments where he would have an arm around my mom and he would look down at her and smile. There were times where he would carry me around on his shoulders. There were times where he would put a bandage on my scraped knees. These moments were usually overshadowed by the numerous times he was drunk or away. But they were still there. And I had a feeling there were way more of those good moments with Cecilia than with us.

"What makes her so different than Mom?" I asked him.

He blinked in surprise before looking down. He seemed to be thinking very seriously about his response before he spoke, which actually shocked me. He sighed heavily before looking back up at me. "Your mother was always a blunt person. There was no bullshitting with her. She would say the complete truth, even if it hurt. Cecilia...she knows exactly what to say, even if she's lying to protect you."

"I'd rather have honesty than a lie."

"That's what makes us so different, son."

I stared at him in silence. I looked down at the floor before licking my lips as I looked back up to him. I had to be completely honest with him. I never held back in telling him the truth so I had no reason to hold back then.

"She's beautiful, Jack."