Just Admit That You Love Me

"Are you going to be alright tonight?" I asked, walking over to Mikenna who had just gotten off the phone with Rylee. We were sitting in her apartment and she looked like a complete wreck but she still hadn't cried. Well she still hadn't cried with me at least. I had heard all about her drunken fiasco last night when I ran into Braxton late this afternoon. He told me he was planning a surprise for her but he wouldn't tell me what it was. I hope it takes her mind off of what's going on though; she needs a break. Hey, maybe she'll figure out that she loves him and all will be right in the world. Except for Geoff and I of course, because I highly doubted tonight was going to miraculously bring us together.

I watched as Mikenna curled up in a ball on the couch, pulling the blankets up around her, her face staring intently at the T.V. "I'm okay, Lauren, don't worry about me," she mumbled into her blankets. She hadn't said much to me about the Rylee situation except for that she was never speaking to Tristyn again. I don't even think she's mentioned a word of it to Tristyn yet and I was mad that Tristyn hadn't come over to at least attempt to explain the situation; even if Mikenna wouldn't forgive her, it was still worth the effort. I suddenly felt guilty for already knowing about the two of them together and not telling Mikenna about it the second I found out. I couldn't tell her I knew now, she'd never speak to me again. Granted, I didn't know Tristyn was the girl until Braxton told me earlier.

"I can cancel with Geoff and stay home with you if you want." I suggested hopefully. She would really be doing me a favour. The last thing I wanted to do was go out with Geoff tonight after the way he treated me, but he insisted and he would not leave me alone, so I agreed. I was actually scared that he was about to get on his knees and beg me to go and it just felt wrong taking away a guy's pride like that, so I stopped it before it could happen. Unfortunately, that meant agreeing to his date.

"No, no, you go out. Really, I'm okay. I kind of want to be alone tonight anyways." She smiled at me weakly and I knew immediately that this was a losing battle. No matter how 'okay' she said she was, she wouldn't actually be okay, but she would also be pissed if I didn't go out tonight because of her.

I looked at the clock. It was nearing eight and I hadn't done anything to make myself look that little extra bit nice. I was wearing the same outfit I had been wearing earlier today at the beach; jeaned capris and a tank. My hair hung loosely below my shoulders and my flips flops were by the door, waiting for me to put them on.

"If you need anything. Anything at all, Mikenna, give me a call. Okay?" She mumbled a 'hmm' just as there was a knock at the door. I looked over at Mikenna who was still staring at the T.V and silently begged her with my eyes to change her mind. I guess I had to admit that there was that tiny part of me that wanted to see Geoff, but a bigger part of me was screaming 'no, keep that door shut!' I ignored that bigger part of me and opened the door.

"Ready for our date?" Geoff said, his smiling stretching from ear to ear. He was dressed in beige khaki shorts and a black t-shirt with a red sweater over top. Well at least I knew this was going to be a casual hangout; that was a relief.

"Yes, I'm ready for our hangout" I said, correcting him. I had told him earlier that I didn't want this to be a date and I meant it.

"Shall we?" He said, holding his arm out for me to take and clearly ignoring my correction. I didn't feel like touching him so I walked past him ignoring the gesture. "Lauren, can you please give this a chance?"

I stopped walking and looked at him, really looked at him, to make sure he was actually being sincere this time. Really though, how did he expect me to trust him after everything we've been through? He's never liked commitment and every time we've gotten closer, he's pushed me away. If he was just going to do the same thing again this time what was the point of me going out with him? He seemed like he was being serious though, but what did I know?

"Okay," I said. "I just don't feel like being physical in any way, shape, or form." He was really going to have to work at this for me to put even an ounce of trust in him.

"No physical contact... okay." He said hesitantly. "This way." He pointed towards the beach as soon as we exited the hotel. It was still light outside, the sun floating above the horizon, getting ready for the sunset. We walked in silence as he led me down to the bottom of the beach and over to a dock.

"A boat?" I said as soon as we reached the end of the dock. I was expecting to just sit there or something, not have to get inside a moving object that would force us to isolate ourselves from the rest of the world. "A boat!"

"The ocean breaks off into a lake-like cove just around the corner so we won't drift off anywhere." He said, unsure about my reaction. "Come on, get in. It'll be fun!" I watched as he hopped into the pontoon boat and reached his hand out to help me in. I reached over and held his hand, allowing him to help me into the boat. I hated how a jolt of electricity shot through me with the feel of his touch.

"What are we going to do on a boat?" I asked, not sounding ungrateful, just curious. "Not that I don't like boats or anything, I'm just wondering."

"What are we going to do on a boat, Lauren? Well," He took a second to grab the two fishing poles resting on the ground by his feet. "We're going to fish." I felt a smile begin to spread across my face and stopped myself.

"And how do you know if I like fishing?" I asked; my attempt at being a smart-ass.

"Because you told me so." He said smirking at me. "A months ago at Carter Cannon's party, you said to me, 'Geoff, my brother doesn't take me fishing anymore.' To which I replied, 'does this bother you?' and you said, 'yes, it kind of does.' Then I told you I would take you sometime since he had stopped, but we never got around to it. I remember because Carter's backyard extends to the lake and we were looking at it while talking." He started the boat and off we went. "By the way, sorry about having to use a pontoon boat. I thought a speed boat would be more fun, but the rental guy had rented them all out already."

"Pontoon boats are cool," I said enthusiastically. "Do you have any idea how many parties you could have on this thing?" It wasn't a big enough boat to have a million people on it, but it could definitely fit everyone in our group, Tristyn not included of course.

"Yeah, but speed boats are fast." Geoff said emphasizing the word 'fast'. He would though. I mean what guy doesn't like super fast things? Back at home, Geoff would speed down the side streets just because he knew it freaked me out. I always felt like my seat belt wasn't enough to protect me.

We reached the cove, the water seemed more shallow over here. Geoff reached over and grabbed some rope with a brick tied on at the end and threw it in the water. I watched it sink and then looked up at Geoff who was now fussing around with his tackle box. I walked over to where he was and grabbed a pole.

"Want some help?" Geoff asked as I started digging through his box (without asking him but he's trying to win me over so who cares) looking for something to bait the fish with. I shook my head, concentrated, trying to find the perfect one. I found one I liked and attached to the end of my rod, now ready to fish.

We threw our lines in the water and waited. Ten minutes went by with neither of us saying anything. I didn't feel awkward, I just felt peaceful. Part of me thought that Geoff might not be feeling the peacefulness with me practically ignoring him, so I decided to start up the conversation again. "Geoff." I said, turning my head to look at him instead of my rod.

"Yeah?" He said, wheeling his line in and resting his fishing pole against the edge of the boat. He was looking at me intently now, waiting for me to talk.

"How come you remember what I said at Carter's party? I don't even remember half of the things I say when I drunk." I wheeled my line in also to distract me from looking at him too much.

"I remember everything concerning you." He said, moving over and sitting down so that he was right beside me. I felt my cheeks go red and immediately hated myself for it. No, Lauren, you aren't supposed to go weak in the knees when he talks to you. No matter what. "I remember the time you dropped your lollipop in Mrs. Bosman's class in the third grade and you cried for an hour over it. I remember the first time you ever kissed a boy, Leo, Linus, uh-"

"Lealand"

"Yeah, Lealand! I remember you telling me about it as soon as it happened. Your cheeks were all red, it was cute. That was in the eighth grade. I remember the time your dog died and you skipped school for a week, the time Katie at school called you fat and you punched her in the face. I remember the time you wore black to school for a month in grade ten because you wanted to impress that guy in your math class. I remember when you had sex with him for the first time and you cried because he stopped talking to you afterwards. You came over and I made you dessert to cheer you up. All of these things, I remember all of them like they happened yesterday."

I must have been staring at him for a really long time because he started to fiddle with his hands and he wouldn't look at me. I couldn't help it though; I was literally speechless. He remembered all of that? Even the time I cried in third grade over my lollipop. I wanted to cry, I was so touched.

"So," he said, breaking the silence. I could tell he was nervous because he was still fiddling with his hands. Apparently his nerves didn't bother him though because a smile danced on his lips. "Swim time?" And before I knew it, he was lifting me up and tossing us both in the water.

"Geoff!" I screamed as soon as my head lifted above the water again. "It's so cold, you asshole!" I was shouting through my laughter. I could feel myself letting him in again, allowing him to experience the me that wasn't so uptight.

"I didn't think it would be this cold!" He shouted, swimming over to me. I was floating beside the boat, debating on if I should hop back in or not. "Stay in a while, it'll get warmer." He was close enough for me to see his eyes in full detail. The sun was gone now, the moon taking it's place. The cove was deserted, the only light source was the boat.

"I hate you," I said, pushing my wet hair out of my face. Despite my words, I could feel myself smiling.

"You don't look like you hate me," He said smirking at me. He was floating an arms length away from me and I could tell he was debating on coming any closer or not. I reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling him towards me.

"No, I don't." I whispered. I had been trying not to get caught up in him, but I couldn't help it. He made my heart flutter.

"Do you feel the minnows nibbling your toes?" He asked, resting his forehead against mine. I shook my head at him indicating that I hadn't. He smiled. "Do you feel this?" He brought his hands to my sides and gently brushed his fingertips up them. I didn't answer. "This?" He traced his fingertips up my arms now. "What about this?" I felt his hands gently make their way up my back, underneath the wet pieces of fabric.

I still hadn't answered, but I didn't have to. I took all of my clothes off, watching Geoff watch me, and threw them on the boat. He rested his forehead against mine again as I focused on unbuttoning his shorts. He had his arms wrapped around me and holding on to the boat behind my head. I helped him take off his shorts and he took off his sweater and shirt.

I pulled him in close, brushing my lips against his lightly. He took my legs and wrapped them around his waist, deepening the kiss. One of his hands cupped my face now as he pressed his body completely against mine, his other hand still holding onto the boat.

"Is it a date yet?" He whispered against my lips. I felt myself giggle as I kissed him. "I'll take that as a yes... Lauren."

"Mmm, yes?" I whispered back. He backed his head away from mine for a second and made sure I was looking at him.

"I really do love you." I leaned over and kissed him, my lips landing on his hard. I felt his hand explore my body, his touch sending bolts of electricity throughout my body.

"I love you, too."