Primitive Instincts

R I V E R

I opened my eyes to pain the next morning, a shock that ran through the side of my body that wasn't close to the wall.

"Ow!" i screamed, then clamped my hand over my mouth when i saw it was only 1 in the morning.

"Rivur?" I heard a familiar voice ask. I breathed a sigh of relief as I realized it was just Max.

Max is 6. He is also the only reason I'm still in this hell hole.

We adopted him as soon as he was born, when I was ten. Back then, the beatings weren't so bad, heck some people considered them normal. But when Max came home, and they saw how much i loved him, things changed. You see they had leverage then, something to keep me from talking about what went on with home.

If I ever said one word, one peep about what happened, and police showed up at my house, Max would get hurt. They hadn't touched him yet, so it wasn't like the police could just take him. He hadn't been harmed.

So i never said anything. I wouldn't be the reason he got hurt. He was like a little candle in all of the darkness that surrounded me. He didn't understand what happened in the basement, and if i could help it, he never would.

"Max, what are you doing in here?" I whispered, surprised that my cry of pain hadn't woken Crystal.

"I had a nightmaur."

"Ohh those suck. You wanna sleep with me?" i asked, scooting over, trying to ignore the pain it caused.

He didn't respond but i felt him slid in next to me. Max was like a pet to my parents. A cute little thing to show off to people, but something they really ignored.

I would have loved to be ignored.

"Do yoou evur have nightmaurr's?"

"All the time buddy...all the time." I said, falling back into all of the memories of the nightmares I'd had in my life.

Hell, my life was a nightmare. A living, never-ending nightmare. Like the ones where you know you're dreaming but you can't wake up.

"Why did daddy pack all of my things into a bag?" he whispered, catching on that we had to be quiet.

"We're moving somewhere far away. I think." I honestly had no idea where La Push was.

"Okay." he said. He was so compliant with everything. He never asked questions, he just did what was told and didn't complain. That's part of the reason why he never noticed when i was missing, he had been told not to ask, or even speak of it. He also was never allowed to go in the basement, so he never did, thank God.

"I can't go back to sleep." he whined.

He was a legendary insomniac and there was only one thing that could make him sleep.

I leaned down right next to his ear and whispered in a low, mysterious voice.

"'the time has come' the walrus said, 'to talk of many things. of shoes---and ships---and sealing wax. of cabbages---and king. and why the sea is boiling hot? and whether pigs have wings?'"

Those were like magic words for him, and not even ten minutes later he was fast asleep. I stared at him for a while, the moon illuminating his face. Some of his dark hair had fallen into his eyes and i gently brushed it away. He was the closest thing i had to a real family.

The next morning things were fast. We ate breakfast fast and moved into the car fast. I barely had time to bandage myself up before we were out the door and flying down the highway to the airport.

"We won't be living on the La Push reservation itself-" my dad began.

"All of the houses are way too small." Crystal cut in.

"But she can spend all her free time down there. Crystal you and...River will be going to Forks high." he sneered my name like it was a dirty word. Typical.

"Oh but daddy having her around is so-o-o bad for my reputation! Can't you just make her go to the school on the reservation! Please please please oh pretty please!" she practically screamed, but it sounded a lot more like a demand when she said it.

"Well....i can try." he muttered. Max budded in giggling before he spoke in a deep throaty voice.

"There is no try. Do or do not." he laughed again and i turned a weak smile at him. I wasn't ready to be moving like this, it hurt.

"Yeah, what Melvin said." Crystal cheered.

"My name is Max!" he screamed, being awfully loud for being so close to her.

"Shut-up!" my mom screamed. Then proceeded to make plans with Crystal to go shopping as soon as we were settled. Crystal would be taken care of first. Then Max, and then me. I always came last.

I wouldn't be able to start school again for at least a week, which meant I'd be trapped in that God forsaken house.

I kept my face blank, never making a wrong move, and stared out the window, waiting to get to the airport, then our new home, where ever the hell it was.

Forks was beautiful. I absolutely loved it. It was cloudy and rainy and green at the same time. The rain hung perfectly on the leaves, making for excellent pictures. Not then of course because my mom was watching me and she would accuse me of wasting time.

I carried my bags along with Crystals, and when we got to the house, the screen door slammed into my face, making me fall back and get me and my bags dirty. Crystal's were safe though, which meant i was only slapped a couple of times for being clumsy.

The house was nice. A white Victorian with blue shutters and a wrap around porch. There were woods in in the backyard and the street to the front. It was everything a good family should have in a home. But it was on the inside that you saw what kind of family it really was.

I knew that. I knew the kind of family I lived in. No one else did, and each day was growing increasingly unbearable. I had to stay strong though. Maybe i could take Max and run...

No, that wouldn't work. I had nowhere to run to. No one to seek refuge with. It was just me and Max. Sometimes i wished we lived in our own little world, where they couldn't hurt me anymore.

Other times I wished I didn't live at all, but that was rare.

Unpacking was left to me while Crystal and mom went to the mall, and dad sat on his ass in front of the TV. I honestly didn't know how we afforded the house.

Max helped me a lot, and he actually did help get the job done faster. It wasn't long before I was done and could go relax onto my cot, finally done for the day.

Max strolled in and talked to me for a while about nothing and everything. I could barely focus with the pain that was running through my body. I tried to though, and when he finally left i collapsed, to tired and hurt to think.

Then I closed my eyes and drifted off. Before I did, I prayed to God that my dreams would leave me there