Reduced To Tears.
Even When You Laugh
Caris couldn’t bear it. Tears streamed down her face. Hayden and Ella’s happiness was her misery. She could never remember being so weak. So powerless. But most of all, she wished Hayden would be with her. She knew that if he would just try, he would be happier with her than Ella. But as much as her mind would tell her, her heart told her this wouldn’t be like Daisy. That this would last longer. A lot longer. But every time she thought about it, her head would throb with pain, and her heart would ache. ‘Is this what love is like?’ Caris thought bitterly to herself. ‘Coz it’s not worth it.’ Caris was mad. And confused. And sad. And broken. She needed her friends. Caris was beautiful. Nobody ever told her that. She wanted to hear she what she was. Or maybe, she needed to her it. But nobody seemed to want to tell her. Maybe they were afraid of how she would be ,if she was to know. It might have made a difference to what happened to her. But regardless, she needed to know.
Another gloomy morning. Caris’s mum had asked if she wanted to go out with her, and her little sister. Caris had declined. She was wearing a large, loose, black knitted cardigan with long leggings, and her pink fluffy slippers. Her hair was plaited into two pigtails, lying on either side of her shoulder. Caris walked slowly out onto the balcony, where the rain had began to fall in sprinkles. Caris’s tears started to fall, harder than ever. Over a boy. One stupid boy. Her voice was becoming softer, quieter. She was slipping away. She was bawling and her beautiful face was red and puffy, tear tracks etched into every pore. She didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything anymore. Hayden Prince was the only thing that was ever on her mind anymore. He consumed her, and she hated him for it.
“YOU’VE RUINED MY LIFE!” Caris screamed into the rainy view.
The waves on the beach were huge, and Caris slid down the glass railing, rain falling onto her. She was soaked to the bone, another thing that would have bothered her, three months ago, but now, it was just another thing on her list. The radical pain Hayden had put her in was enough for her. She was wishing he would leave her system forever. But a small part of her loved him. She loved this little game. But she hated it too, and that confused her. She wished he would wrap his arms around her and tell her he loved her, and she was beautiful. But she knew that was a big wish to make. She knew he would never do that. She was ordinary ,and she was Caris, and when she went back to school, she would be quiet. Invisible. Anything to get her through the term. And she would do this with, or without her friends support.
Another gloomy morning. Caris’s mum had asked if she wanted to go out with her, and her little sister. Caris had declined. She was wearing a large, loose, black knitted cardigan with long leggings, and her pink fluffy slippers. Her hair was plaited into two pigtails, lying on either side of her shoulder. Caris walked slowly out onto the balcony, where the rain had began to fall in sprinkles. Caris’s tears started to fall, harder than ever. Over a boy. One stupid boy. Her voice was becoming softer, quieter. She was slipping away. She was bawling and her beautiful face was red and puffy, tear tracks etched into every pore. She didn’t care. She didn’t care about anything anymore. Hayden Prince was the only thing that was ever on her mind anymore. He consumed her, and she hated him for it.
“YOU’VE RUINED MY LIFE!” Caris screamed into the rainy view.
The waves on the beach were huge, and Caris slid down the glass railing, rain falling onto her. She was soaked to the bone, another thing that would have bothered her, three months ago, but now, it was just another thing on her list. The radical pain Hayden had put her in was enough for her. She was wishing he would leave her system forever. But a small part of her loved him. She loved this little game. But she hated it too, and that confused her. She wished he would wrap his arms around her and tell her he loved her, and she was beautiful. But she knew that was a big wish to make. She knew he would never do that. She was ordinary ,and she was Caris, and when she went back to school, she would be quiet. Invisible. Anything to get her through the term. And she would do this with, or without her friends support.