Hajime no Insho

How the rest of the band could remain calm was beyond him. Kouyou had lit a cigarette and had taken to smoking it slowly, Tetora was humming to himself, the two guitarists were talking about how 'fucking awesome' it was that their first live was mere minutes away, and even Akira had managed to keep cool. He was simply tuning his bass, waxing it, making sure it looked perfect.

And Takanori was, in a way, losing his mind. He hadn't expected that a band with their microscopic fan base would have a live so quickly, and he'd never had problems being in front of people, but suddenly the thought was intimidating to him. So he'd been reduced to tapping his drumsticks anxiously against his legs, glancing around, jealous as hell that the other four members didn't even look nervous.

He heard Kouyou say something about ticket prices, and then he heard Tetora whistle in amazement at the sound of two thousand yen per person. Sure, it wasn't much, and the band was only getting half that in personal profits, but it was a start. And the fact that people had paid period to see the five of them perform had Takanori even more intimidated.

A few feet away from him, Akira was chuckling, adjusting his noseband with his bass laid out facedown in his lap. "Relax, man," he said, and he flashed a smile, wincing a little as the ties of his noseband caught at his hair. "It's only a few hundred people. You look like you're about to go on at the Budokan or something." He chuckled again, and then he picked up the rag he'd been waxing his beloved instrument with. "Besides, we've only got four songs of our own."

Takanori nodded, and the incessant tapping decreased just slightly as his thoughts focused on words instead of faces staring up at him. "You performed before?" He smiled a little as Akira nodded. "You remember being nervous for your first performance, then."

The bassist smiled. "Point taken."

Internally, Takanori's palm met his forehead too many times to count. "Sorry," he said. He gave a half-smile, and he gave a sigh, his anxious tapping slowing to a stop as Akira smiled, and he watched as the bassist returned his attention to his instrument, pressing lightly on the rag, moving it clockwise, moving it counterclockwise. "How long have you been into music, anyway?"

"Since I first learned how to play." The bassist smiled. "Me and Kouyou have known each other a few years, so we've done a few odd projects together. Him on guitar, me on bass. Played a few times in cafes and places like that." He looked up at the anxious drummer, his smile still in place. "You?"

Takanori shrugged. "I've always liked music. First band I saw was at the Budokan, and I've kind of wanted to perform in some way ever since." Another shrug, and he let his mouth lift into a half-smile. "For a while, I thought it was because I wanted to piss off my parents. But that immaturity only lasted until I realized it was something I could actually do." He glanced down, and his gaze took to studying his drumsticks, his thumb following along in some kind of hand-mind coordination. "It got me kicked out, but it's turned out to be worth it."

Akira smiled, and there was silence again as he brushed his hand over the sheen of his bass, deciding that he'd waxed it back to perfection. Tetora's humming had ceased by now, and he and Kouyou were talking, and the guitarist was still nursing a dying cigarette while the man that Takanori only knew as Yui had moved to the mirror to fix his stage makeup.

"You think this band can make it, Akira?"

The bassist shrugged. "Maybe, and maybe not. The fact that we actually have fans is encouraging, though, I must admit." He cracked a smile, and then he glanced over in Kouyou's direction, shaking his head as he saw the guitarist lean forward and grin as he blew out a ring of smoke. Kouyou turned his head and gave him a wink, and then he placed the cigarette between his lips once more, and Akira gave him a 'thumbs-up' in return before looking back over at Takanori. "You a bit less nervous?"

Takanori nodded, and he looked confused as Akira's smile spread. "Yeah, a bit. Why?"

The bassist grinned. "It's show time."

Takanori gave a short nod, and he stood when the rest of the band did, and the anxious tapping resumed. Akira gave him a small smile, slinging his bass over his shoulder, and Takanori waited as Kouyou and Yui went for their guitars, looking incredibly calm and collected. Takanori found that he was jealous. He bit his lip, and he could hear the small crowd cheering as the stage lights dimmed and the band members made their way to their places on stage.

He walked to the drum set, settling onto the seat behind it, and he finally allowed himself to glance up at the people that were watching, waiting for the live to begin. Tetora introduced the band to the crowd, and when he was introduced as Kirihi, he gave a short nod and a peace sign that he hoped the crowd saw. And he prayed for the anxiety to go away, and he called upon every higher power he could think of to help, and he decided that watching the glow-in-the-dark faces was a bad idea for settling such a nervousness.

Tetora glanced back at the members, grinning, and he gave Takanori a wink before the quiet energy from the crowd became a more forceful energy the second the stage lights flashed and Takanori shut his eyes and he fell into a state of repetition; playing just as he'd played in the studio, with just as much enthusiasm and what many would call 'passion' as the rest of the band.

And for the first song of the night, Takanori couldn't really find the will to glance up at the audience. Every time he tried, the same overwhelming anxiety made his stomach turn over miserably, and he was forced to quickly drop his head and continue playing. The reason for his anxiety was, as of yet, still unknown to him, as he usually did quite well with crowds, but his face flushed at the thought of playing in front of small groups of people for years, with only one other person to accompany him. He couldn't imagine starting out the way Akira and Kouyou had.

And he was fucking insane for trying this band.

Or was he?

The crowd seemed to be enjoying their music, and none of the other band members looked like they had a care in the world other than the live. Their sound was strong, and the response to their sound was absolutely solid. Takanori smiled; it was only a small crowd, but they hadn't been booed off the stage yet, and some hidden part of him had been expecting that to happen.

His first-time anxiety was, in fact, unfounded, and the rest of the band had been right all along. They'd chuckled at him and ruffled his hair and told him it was nothing to worry about, and he'd been unable to accept that notion because he'd never experienced anything like this before. He'd never felt appreciated by a crowd before, as most of his 'speeches' in high school had fallen on deaf ears, and he'd only had a few small cafe gigs with groups that had given him a shot.

This experience, however, was overwhelming with something other than anxiety. There was an energy flowing throughout the venue, and Takanori smiled and watched the band members for a moment as Tetora twirled his hair and gave a short MC between songs. They'd hooked the crowd for some reason, and once the second song had begun, most of the tumbling nervousness in his gut had gone thanks to the cheering and the more than positive response from the three hundred people that had paid to see them.

He glanced up at the faces, the arms reaching up, the eyes watching them, the excitement of a fresh band settling in.

And Akira glanced back at him to flash him a smile.

And he grinned back.