Complete Losers

[Gerard's POV]

“Zaaccc Ef-ffron!” I drag out his name as I put my skillful hands to work. I close my eyes tight and stick my tongue out the corner of my mouth as I concentrate on jerking off. Long fast thrusts, I let small moans escape my mouth as I reach my climax.

So you’re probably wondering why I, Gerard Way just jerked off over Zac Effron. Well it's simple really; I am a very horny 18 year old guy with a huge crush on the High school musical hottie. In all honesty I hate his character in that movie and not to mention his completely fake voice, I just think he’s TOTALLY FUCKING HOT! Ooooh yeaah his flawless tanned skin, completely perfect hair and OMG those unbelievably dreamy eyes.
Okay just don’t tell anyone that I'm inlove with him okay. I'm perceived to most people as the creepy kid who wears immensely large amounts of eyeliner, wears black and very much enjoys death type things and bands suck as Iron Maiden, The Misfits, Black Flag and The Ramones. A few othes include The Smashing Pumpkins, The Smiths and Queen [Freddie Mercury is an angel!]. Well the truth is I'm not so ‘freakish’ as people think. Let me tell you other things I thoroughly enjoy.
-Masturbating [a lot]
-Romantic movies
-Porn
-Dressing in drag
-Baking cookies
-Writing love notes
-Harry Potter [I cried when Cedric Diggory died]

Buy now you may or may not of realized I'm gay. Some of my very many crushes are Freddie Mercury, David Bowie, Johnny Depp, The boy across the road, Tania’s brother, Ryan Ross from that band Panic! At the something [can't remember, I don’t listen to much popular mainstream bands] and the lead singer from Fate I escaped. I mean Escape the Fate, [ like I said I don’t listen to much popular bands].
Hmmm any other things that I'm going to confess. Ah yes I'm a virgin. And I moved here to good ol New Zealand from New Jersey, USA when I was 5. I like it here, I suppose. The town I live in is rather small; it's a country type town. The downside is most people here a very unhygienic and dirty. By dirty I mean in a sexual way. [I just shuddered]

So yeah my days are normally spent sleeping, reading [mostly porn], drawing and MSNing my creepy internet friends. I only have one true friend her name is Tania, my best friend since primary school when I saved her from drowning when our class went to the beach. Personally I actually hate swimming, 1. Because I have to expose my skin to the sunlight 2. Because water makes my hair go all icky and 3. I have to wear shorts, and I hate shorts.

My brother Mikey suggests I get laid.
Pffft.