Each Days A Number

Time was a critical factor; one week remained on this tour and Dessie had yet to tell her new best friends about her exciting, yet possibly heart breaking, news. It tore her to pieces to see Garrett beyond happy everyday since they’ve officially been a couple, and to take that away was devastating.

The tour was in Cleveland, being the fifth to the last stop before heading into Canada the next day. Dessie couldn’t stop her raging nerves because today was the day she was going to break the news. After the boys played their set, she planned to tell them. Reciting her words only made her even more nervous, scared even, because she was afraid this could potentially ruin her friendship with the five boys, but also her amazing relationship with Garrett.

She perched herself side stage, watching her boyfriend strum his black bass guitar and smile when he threw his pick in the crowd. As he went to get a new one from atop his amp, his blue stare caught Dessie’s. He smiled and winked before blowing her a kiss. Her eyes dropped to her shoes sadly and when she looked back up, Garrett held a confused expression and nodded his head to her; his way of asking if she was okay, but Des just shook her head and looked away.

“You guys have been wonderful tonight, Cleveland,” John said into his microphone, placing one foot on top of the monitor and resting his forearm on his thigh. “This tour has just about a week left, but we’ll be comin’ around again soon! I hope to see each and every one of your beautiful faces when we return to this wonderful city,” his comment got all of the young girls between the ages of twelve and sixteen that filled the venue to scream at the top of their lungs. “This is our last song that we just put a video out for. It’s called “Everything I Ask For”. If you know the words, please sing along.”

During his brief speech, Dessie couldn’t help but feel even worse about her current situation. It was hard to pay attention any longer and she felt out of it. She didn’t’ even realize the boys ended their set until a pair of arms were wrapped around her waist and a chin was placed on her shoulder.

“Hey, baby,” he whispered in her ear. “Did you like the set?”

Dessie did her best to smile as she turned to face Garrett, snaking her arms around his neck. “I loved it,” he smiled, kissing her softly. “You were amazing,” she whispered.

“Thanks, Des. You’re amazing, too,” Garrett told her and she tightened her grip to hug her boyfriend, resting her head on his shoulder. “You okay, Dessie?”

“Kind of. Will you do me a favor?” He nodded his head. “Could you gather the guys and meet me out back?”

“Yeah, of course,” Garrett leaned down, giving her a short but sweet kiss. “We’ll be out there in five.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, unwrapping her arms from Garrett’s neck and reluctantly making her way outside to the back of the venue.

Her nerves were in full swing and all Dessie could do in order to keep somewhat calm was to pace back and forth in front of the open van. She kept telling herself that everything was going to be okay, that she can tell them about her great opportunity, no problem. But as she took a seat on the floor of the van with her legs dangling above the pavement and her head shoved in her hands, all hope flew out the door.

“Dude, I think she’s asleep,” Kennedy whispered loudly, hitting John’s shoulder to get his attention.

“You’re an idiot,” he rolled his eyes. “When people are asleep, they don’t move,” John told Kenny as Dessie lifted her head to look at the boys.

“She could’ve been sleep walking, or in this case, sleep sitting,” Kenny retorted, causing Pat and Jared to chuckle.

“All of you are idiots,” Garrett told them, sitting next to Dessie and kicking his legs back and forth, occasionally scuffing his shoes on the ground. “So, what’s up?”

“Well,” she began, swallowing the formed lump in her throat. “I have something to tell you guys.”

“We figured that much,” Jared said, shifting his weight to his left leg and sweeping his mop over his forehead.

“It’s actually big news,” she tried to hold back from saying it.

“Oh! So it’s almost as if we’re watching the news on TV!” Kennedy exclaimed, clapping his hands twice.

“Will you guys let her finish?” Garrett snapped. “Go on,” he rubbed her back.

“It’s not exactly like the news, but, well, I just received a great opportunity that I’m really excited for,” a smile broke out on her lips. “I get to manage Paramore’s tour over seas! Their going off to Europe, Japan, and doing a few shows in Australia!” Dessie listed happily.

“That’s great, baby!” Garrett was beyond happy for his girlfriend as he gave her a hug. “It’s what you’ve always wanted.”

“It is. When we were in LA, and I had that meeting, that’s what it was about. My boss thought it was finally time for me to break out and handle a big tour like this.” By now, Dessie was glowing.

“You know, I think I heard of this tour,” Pat spoke. “Isn’t it coming up soon?”

All of Dessie’s excitement and happiness faded once Pat finished his question. Her happy gaze quickly turned sad as she stared at the ground and a heavy sigh parted her lips. She was nervous once again, even more now to have all eyes on her.

“When does it start, Des?” Garrett asked her.

“Um, I don’t, know?” she shrugged but immediately shook her head. “I mean, that’s the problem.”

“What’s the problem, Dessie?” he asked sternly, feeling himself growing upset.

“I, uh, I, in order for me to do this tour, I won’t be able to manage you guys on yours,” Dessie nearly whispered, finding interest in a rock on the floor.

A chorus of “what’s” and “are you serious?” were heard and she could hear the sadness in each of the boys' voices. She couldn’t look at any of them in the eyes because she felt bad enough already.

“When are you leaving for this oh, so extravagant tour?” the sarcasm and slight twinge of bitterness in John’s voice was evident.

“I’m supposed to meet the band in Berlin on the first, but my flight is on the thirtieth.”

You mean you leave a day after this tour ends?” Garrett asked in disbelief; Dessie nodded slowly.

“And you’ve known since LA?” his voice was getting increasingly louder, but she nodded again. “And you’re barely telling us now? Three weeks later!” he stood up, angry at his girlfriend.

“Yes, Garrett. I’m sorry. Okay! What do you want me to say?” she exclaimed, her voice being raised as well.

“How about the truth for once, Dessie! You’ve been lying to me for three weeks, now how am I supposed to trust you?” he spat, walking back to the venue and slamming the door as he disappeared behind it.

The four remaining boys refrained from looking at Dessie before slowly turning away and following Garrett. She dropped her head in her hands. From the beginning, she knew they would be upset; she knew Garrett was going to be hurt. But from all this, she didn’t know Garrett would throw their relationship right in her face.