All I Wanted Was You

He came through a connecting door between our rooms.
“They are jointing rooms?”
“Yeah just in case you needed anything I am right there. You don’t have to go all the way around just go right through alright?”
“Okay.”
“I have to go meet with the songwriters and I know you are tired so take it easy.”
“Sounds nice. Tell me how it goes.”
“will do gorgeous.”
He gave me a nice kiss and a smile and I went to lay down on my bed.
“Oh wow hello light fluffy cloud.”
But I couldn’t get comfortable not with him.
I walked around and the room was pretty big.
I changed into my night gown because I really didn’t feel like going out today after that monster of a paparazzi.
I tried getting comfortable on my bed but it didn’t feel right.
“Well might as well give that thought a shot.”
I went over to the door and walked into his room and laid on his bed.
It was more comfortable than mine.
I opened his suitcase and found a shirt of his and put it on.
Gosh it smelled like him.
I don’t know how to describe how he smells to me.
I laid on his bed and comfortable and almost knocked out quickly.
Even a shirt couldn’t keep the memories at bay…

‘you know you are so amazing and here I thought you were just some stuck up bitch.’
‘thank you?’
‘no I mean it I walked into the bookstore and you were just so whats the right word? So know it all and it irritated me.”
‘is this suppose to make me like you?’
He got closer
‘I don’t know is it working?’
I smirked
‘I don’t know.’

I woke up with the sheets all over the place.
“When are they going to stop?”
When you let go.
“How am I suppose to let go?”
Get angry
“I tried it didn’t happen.”
You didn’t have that moment.
“Moment?”
Trust me it will happen.
The room phone rang.
“Oh Ms. Morgan are you well?”
“Yes I am fine.”
“I just wanted to make sure you are comfortable and to tell you that Mr. Pattinson said he was on his way. Is there anything you need?”
“There is actually.. can you bring me a pie?”
“is there any kind you would like Ms. Morgan?”
“Cherry.”
“We will bring that up to you right away ma’am.”
“And oh and some water please.”
“No problem.”
“Thank you.”
I brought my knees to my chest.
Nathan is never ending pressing matter in my head.
My heart well he left his impression there.
A little wound even.
Yet I didn’t get angry.
Throughout everything he tried to do…I am not angry…what is wrong with me?
I just felt numb afterward.
I mean the death of my parents and then that…it was like I checked out on life for a really long time.
Even when I started to try to get back to normal I was never the same.
I am still not the same.
Here is this wonderful guy and I am not the same.
Should I try to be the same?
There came the knock at the door I was waiting for.
I opened the door and there he stood ruffled hair and green eyes holding my pie of pie and pitcher of water.
A smile crept on my face.
No don’t be the same…because this.
Him…he is different.