You Left Me to Remain With All Your Excuses for Everything

“I think we should go out and see a movie,” Jackie said to Madison as she poured a cup of coffee.

“You’re in some kind of good mood,” Madison said and glared at Jackie.

“Look, what difference does my mood make?”

“I just can’t believe you slept with him in a restaurant when your date was there! How bad is that?”

“Madison, please,” Jackie whined. It had been two days since she’d run into Tyler in the restaurant. “I know you think I’m some kind of stupid slut, but please believe it wasn’t on purpose.”

“I don’t think you are a stupid slut. I just think he’s a dick face and you for whatever reason don’t believe me.”

“Because Madison, I know he acts like a jerk, and I know he’s still married. But he loves me, I know he does,” Jackie said and pushed her hair behind her ear. Madison sighed and picked up one of the kittens and petted its ear for a minute.

“I just don’t know that I believe that,” she said.

“You don’t know him very well; you’ve never given him a chance.”

“What I know is every time he leaves here you end up sleeping with me crying all night because you miss him and you wish he’d just come be yours. But he never makes any effort; he never takes that step you know.”

“He will,” Jackie said. “He promised.”

“He’s been promising for a year.”

“Oh my god…” Jackie said and hurried out of the kitchen, leaving Madison confused. She went into her room and picked up her cell phone and turned on its backlight.

New TXT Message: Tyler was on the screen. She sighed and opened it and looked over the little picture of a red rose.

Happy Anniversary it read. She smiled to herself. It was the one year mark since they’d first started “dating”.

Happy Anniversary I can’t believe you remembered =) she typed quickly and sent back as Madison appeared in her doorway.

“Why did you just blot out of the room and leave me standing there like a dumbass?” She asked with annoyance.

“I’m sorry, I had to check something,” Jackie said as her phone illuminated and vibrated in her hand. She opened it to read the new message.

I’m coming over tonight to celebrate with you. Of course I remembered, I love you it read. Madison rolled her eyes as Jackie smiled and typed back a confirmation.

“It’s our anniversary,” Jackie said quickly.

“The anniversary of when you became his whore?” Madison snapped. Jackie’s smile faded a little bit and she stood up from where she was sitting on her bed.

“Thank you,” Jackie said and walked into her bathroom and slammed the door. Madison sighed harshly and there was a knock on the door. She sighed and went to answer it. Josh was standing on the other side of the door.

“When are you going to give me a key?”

“After you stop losing them,” she pouted and put her arms around him. “Do you think I’m a bitch?”

“Is that a trick question?” he asked and smiled down at his girlfriend. She punched him in the chest and he coughed a little bit. “Well somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning,” he said. She looked at him with frustration.

“I think I made Jackie cry,” she sighed. “I guess it’s their anniversary or some shit, and I said something before I thought.”

“Their anniversary? Of what? An extra marital affair?” he asked with confusion.

“She’s in love with him, Josh,” Madison sighed. Josh nodded.

“I know, it’s really unfortunate,” he sighed. “She’s such a nice girl, she deserves so so much better.”

“Then why don’t you tell her that!” Madison suggested. “Maybe if she hears it from you, it will get into her head.”

“It isn’t my place,” Josh said and shrugged.

“Please,” she pouted. He sighed.

“I’ll talk to her I guess…but I don’t think she will listen to me any better.”

“Just try!” Madison insisted. Josh sighed and let go of her. He walked into the house and knocked on Jackie’s bedroom door. She opened it in a huff with mascara on her face. He smiled at her and she sighed.

“Hi Josh,” she said.

“Hey, I heard it was your anniversary,” he smiled. She frowned.

“It’s lost its importance now,” she sighed. He looked at her with sympathy.

“Take a walk with me,” he said.

“Madison will have a fit,” she said.

“No, she’ll be fine, come on. Let’s go to that doughnut place up the street,” he said. “You look like you could use something sweet,” he laughed. She sniffed and looked at the floor for a second.

“Fine,” she said and nodded. She slipped on a pair of black flip flops and a sweatshirt. She left with Josh and they walked out of the apartment complex together. “What is this about Josh?” she finally asked.

“You know, I’m not usually one to invade your life right?”

“But you are going to,” she sighed. “Look, I know everybody hates Tyler…”

“I don’t hate him…he’s a nice enough guy. I just don’t think he’s good for you,” Josh sighed. Jackie put her hands in the pockets of her zip up hoodie and sniffed.

“Nobody understands you know, I know he loves me, I can tell when I’m alone with him. No one else gives him the chance.”

“Well I don’t know why Madison feels the way she does. She hasn’t told me a lot about why she feels that way,” Josh shrugged.

“Because, the night he told me he was married…she spent most of the night in my room with me while I cried. I’d already been dating him for five months before I knew, so when he told me I was already attached to him. She thinks he did that on purpose, to make sure I wouldn’t leave,” Jackie explained. “But that night, I cried so hard I puked. I felt so…used or whatever…and I felt cheap.”

“Can ask why you kept the relationship going then?”

“Because, he promised me he loved me, and that he would leave her soon and that he wasn’t happy with her. He promises me that all the time,” she said. “Now, I can’t leave him, because I love him too much, and I know he loves me too.”

“But he hasn’t left his wife, he’s been sleeping with you for a year and he hasn’t left his wife.”

“I know,” she said and walked into the doughnut shop with Josh. “You better eat one of these things! Every time I go some place with you I feel like such a bad eater.”

“Fine, I’ll get one this time,” he laughed. They each bought one doughnut and a cup of coffee. “So, this is your anniversary right?”

“Yea, he’s coming over tonight to celebrate. I’m looking forward to it. I have something…important to tell him,” she said and looked down at her coffee.

“What is that? If you don’t mind.”

“You have to swear on your life that you will not tell Madison! If you tell her one word of this I will fucking slaughter you, you hear me!” she said firmly. He smiled a little bit.

“It can’t be that bad,” he said.

“It’s not necessarily bad at all, but she cannot know until I tell her. I swear to go Josh I will kill you if you breathe a word of this to her,” she said.

“Alright, I swear on my life I won’t tell my girlfriend something you told me.”

“Don’t make it sound like that!” she whined. “It’s not like you’re lying to her.”

“Okay okay, I promise,” he said and sipped his coffee. Jackie took a deep breath and picked at her doughnut for a minute while she thought about how to say it.

“I’m a few days late…” she said gently.

“Late for what?” he asked, knowing well what the answer to that question was.

“I haven’t tested, because I’m only about four days late. But…I have to tell him. It’s time for him to leave her now you know. It’s time for this to end and for something else to start.”

“You’re pregnant?” he asked.

“I don’t know yet, but I think so…” she sighed and picked at her doughnut again. “I hope so.”

“Oh…” he said and looked down. He didn’t know what to say to her.

“I know, you think it’s stupid that I want to be. But I mean, it’s a chance to finally just be happy you know. I love him so much, and I need him so much.”

“Just…be sure you know what you’re in for,” he said gently and took a sip of his coffee.

Later that night the doorbell rang three times. Madison answered the door and tried her best to not look annoyed. “Hello, Tyler,” she said as pleasantly as possible.

“Hello, Madison,” Tyler said. “Is Jackie in?”

“She’s getting dressed,” Madison said. Tyler nodded and walked into the apartment and looked at Josh on the sofa.

“Hey Josh,” he said kindly.

“Tyler,” Josh greeted and looked at the TV screen. He’d kept his promise to Jackie and hadn’t told Madison anything about the possibility of Jackie being pregnant. Jackie walked out of her bedroom then in a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Tyler smiled at her.

“Tyler!” She said excitedly. He hadn’t called to tell her he was on his way. She put her arms around him and kissed him hard on his lips. He laughed.

“It’s good to see you too,” he smiled. “I missed you.”

“Not as much as I missed you,” she said and kissed him again. Madison rolled her eyes with disgust and plopped down next to Josh.

“Not as much as I missed you,” she mocked under her breath, earning a light swat from Josh. She glared at him and he laughed and kissed her cheek.

“Just let her be happy Madison, I have a feeling the winds are going to change soon,” he said.

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Madison said. Jackie looked at her friends sitting on the sofa and she sighed before looking back up at Tyler and smiling brightly. He smiled back at her before lifting her into a threshold to make a show of them together. She laughed.

“Stop it,” she said as he kissed her.

“Please, stop it,” Madison muttered. Josh elbowed her slightly.

“Be nice,” he said.

“Anyways babe, Christine is out with her friends for the night, so I can stay with you all night,” he said. She smiled with genuine cheer.

“That’s amazing!” she smiled.

“And, I told her I’d most likely stay with a friend tonight as well, so she won’t be calling me,” he promised. Jackie smiled again and kissed him several time. Madison rolled her eyes and stood up to push past them into the kitchen before she vomited from their little show.

Jackie was happy he’d be with her the entire night. That way she could enjoy the night with him and tell him her news in the morning, just in case he didn’t take it well. “Put me down, I’m going to make dinner,” she said. He complied with her and set her on her feet and kissed her one last time before letting go of her waist. “Sit down, watch TV,” she said and motioned to the sofa. He cleared his throat a little and looked at Josh. Josh shrugged him off and motioned to the love seat. Tyler took a seat on the sofa and Jackie hurried into the kitchen.

“What was with the big fucking production?” Madison asked. Jackie sighed.

“It’s our anniversary,” she said. Madison sighed and took a sip of water.

“Fine,” she said.

“I’m making dinner, are you and Josh going to eat?”

“I think we’ll go out and let you enjoy your anniversary without us,” Madison said and walked out of the kitchen. Jackie sighed and started on dinner while Madison and Josh left the apartment. Jackie made a nice dinner for herself and Tyler, and afterwards she led him into her bedroom and lit candles before lying on the bed under him.

“I love you,” she said.

“I love you too,” he smiled and kissed her before he entered her.

Christine’s night out had been canceled and she walked back into her house and sighed with frustration. “Tyler!” she called. There was no answer. “He must have already left,” she sighed and went up the stairs and started to get the laundry together. “Why can’t that pig ever pick up his dirty fucking pants?” she asked herself with some annoyance. She took the basket down to the laundry room and started to go through the pockets of his jeans like she always did. She was surprised when he hand closed around something soft like cotton and she pulled her hand out of the jeans pocket to see what in the world it was.

She set the pants down on the washing machine so she could unroll the item in her hand. Her heart jumped into her throat when she realized it was a pair of black women’s panties. Her entire body flooded with emotions and her eyes filled with tears. All of her suspicions were coming true and now that she had proof she didn’t even know what to think about it.