Without You I'll Be Miserable at Best

I’m stuck with Taylor for the rest of the night. I don’t want to be. I try and get out of it, but the threat is repeated. Over and over again. It’s drilled in my head. “Leave and Zack get’s hurt.” There was no way I could live with myself if he got hurt because of me. I wasn’t even allowed to text him. I-I had promised him I’d let him know if I was coming back or not. Taylor wrote me a list of rules. And the only way I can have any communication with Zack is by either: a, mocking him, b harming him in any way, or c calling him names.

And then another rule, I can’t stand this one the most, its just so… so terrible. I have to do what she says. Whether it’s punching Zack, (like I’ll ever do that I’d probably kill myself before that would happen.) or making out with her (EW!). I have to do it. I’m being such a wimp, but I know that if I were to hit Zack or harm him in any physical way, it would be tamer then what Demetrios would do.

My nails dig into my palms as Taylor presses her body up against mine. I can’t believe she’s doing this at school. I really can’t… oh wait, I can. I receive glares from the teachers, ushering kids to go to homeroom. I blush, it was so embarrassing be near her. I mean she was so obnoxious and didn’t even have a nice body. She was like a rectangle, Zack had more curves then she did.

How did I ever go out with this, you ask? I honestly thought she had a good personality, key word, thought. She used to be so considerate and caring, now she only cares about herself and having a ‘hawt boifriend,’ and no that’s not spelled wrong. That’s actually how she writes that to her friends. She sure played me. I was such an idiot and was now stuck with her.

I push her off of me, pulling out the rest of my books and binders, holding them to my side. She glares, and then fakes a pout.

God, did I hate this bitch. “What?” I mutter, walking down the hall to my math class.

“Rule four, you’re suppose to act like you’re head over heals in love with me.” She snaps, cocking her hip out, putting her hand at her waist.

I take a deep breath, one of those loud obnoxious ones, “I’m trying. It’s the fact I can’t fucking stand you that’s getting in my way.”

“You’re going to hold my hand and walk me to class, rule 3.” She snarls at me, “and you’re going to do something to Zack. I don’t know what yet, but you are.”

I glare holes into her head, as my hand snatches her angrily. “I fucking hate you.”

She smiles like a maniac. “I know, I love it.”

“You’re a sick twisted bitch, ya know that?” That just makes her smile wider.

As we walk towards her classroom. I see Zack walking in the ahead of us. He’s trying to act invisible. He’d been doing that a lot, as of late. Taylor kicks me.

“He’s going to turn around, glare at him. The same way you to me. If you don’t, you know what happens to you and him. My brother’s just waiting for you to screw up.”

I close my eyes and wait for him to turn around, silently praying he won’t. Sadly, he does. He looks at me with those sad puppy eyes. The ones that make me want to rush over to him and squeeze him so hard he may not be able to breath. Hard enough that we’re so close I can hear his heart beating through our skin.

I was so in love with this boy.

My glare is full of venom. He physically gulps and scurries towards the boy’s bathrooms.

Taylor smiles at me, kissing the corner of my lips. She had tried for my lips, but I turned at the right time. Thankfully. Who knew where the hell those had been? I certainly didn’t.

“Good job babe.” She giggles. “Meet me at my locker before seventh period. I expect you to make out with me as soon as I get close enough.”

Die bitch. Fucking die.

“Sure,” I fake a smile, releasing her hand. I walk off and wish I could just make this whole incidence disappear. I would not be able to get through a week without being near Zack.

I see Zack scurry past me four times the rest of the day. I greet the bitch at her locker, making out with her. My enthusiasm? Let’s just say I was as enthusiastic as a person eating a garbage bag… full of garbage. Her mouth probably had the same taste. Didn’t the bitch ever hear of a little thing called toothpaste? I guess not.

She makes me walk with her, hand in hand to the cafeteria. She never ate in the cafeteria. She always left campus. Zack always stayed on campus. There was my answer to my non-existent question. We sit at a table I see the rest of my gang throwing me disapproving glances.

I sigh. I was going to have some shit to explain. Knowing Jack, I was. Jack would be pissed that I was ignoring Zack. He has his suspicions but didn’t ask or anything. I knew he had a bet going on with the guys at the table (Zack excluded), that I was not completely heterosexual. The same went for Zee, but he had his money (YES! Literally, tangible currency) that he was gay. I was hoping he was. But going back to Jack, I was in for an earful, now or later. I was hoping later, away from Taylor. Those two did not see eye to eye, but neither did me and her.

I see him go to stand up, but Zack stops him tugging on his the hem of Jack’s shirt. I had to stop myself from ‘awing,’ because… well Zack was just so god damn cute!

I frown when I see Rian and Zack standing up and walk towards the door behind the lunch table I was sitting at. It wasn’t because they were moving, it was what Taylor had whispered in my ear.

“Trip the loser and call him a fag.”

I dread the fact as he gets closer. I throw my legs out, sadly successfully making him stumble. Thankfully, Rian catches him. I quickly mutter, “Fag.” I’m hoping he didn’t hear it. He knew I found the word disgusting.

I get a glare from Rian and notice Zack’s shoulder’s slump. Yeah, he had heard that.

I grimace and put my head in my hands.

I was such a fucking terrible friend.