Letter's to an Angel

...;

I logged into his emails.
I know his password.
I read the emails from him.

"
I'm giving up on him.
Theres no point, he loves someone else.
I just told him I was gunna disappear for a while
He didn't seem to care
I dunno if/when/ I'll speak to him again.
It's just pointless.
He barely knows I exist.

"

That was a few weeks ago.

Then there was a bunch of things he'd said like, he was talking about you like he ddin't know you, I felt so disconnected reading them.

This has been going on for so long.

I can't ... I just cant even say anything right now.
I feel like the filthiest human being alive.
I don't deserve the air I'm choking on.
I don't deserve you.

He had said and known things that no one else should have knows. Everything fitted. It all worked.

I feel sick.

It hurts.

Sincerely, always,

...