Welcome to the Club, Shatter or Survive

The next day, I was actually going to go to my new school again, it was probably a really bad idea, skipping yesterday. I couldn't help it though, my face was to red. I didn't want to walk in there, and have people looking at my face. Today I was going, I have too...
I got up pretty early, and was all ready to go, I went to school a tad early, but I didn't get out of my car until the bell rang. I noticed neither Jenny nor Katie have been texting me lately. I thought that if they came with me, this would all be easier, but it isn't one bit.
When I walked into my first period class, I noticed Josh sleeping; he sure does sleep a lot.
Perhaps it's because it's morning...

After first period, a lot of people have started talking to me. It was the weirdest thing, okay I KNOW in high school that this doesn't happen. I mean, sure some people get friendly with new people, but not as many as the people I've gotten today. I'm not complaining, I don't think it's a bad thing at all; it saves me from having to muster up my strength to try and befriend someone. This is just too weird, I have a feeling Katie and Jenny did something...

By the time lunch came, I had so many people sitting next to me, and others at tables closest to me. Jenny and Katie came over with big smiles on their face; they pushed their way in next to me.

"So how are all your new friends?" said Katie grinning.

"Yeah, you like them?" said Jenny.

"What did you do?" I said.

"Nothing!" said Katie.

"Yeah...Totally nothing." said Jenny sarcastically, Katie elbowed Jenny.

"Owe!" said Jenny.

I frowned then bit my lip.

"Please tell me what you did." I said.

"Oh we just told a few people you were totally loaded." said Jenny.

My jaw dropped.

"And bragged a little about how your parents gave us money..." said Katie uneasily.

"I..."

"I told you guy's so many times, that I don't want friends that like me, just because I have money!" I said.

"I know, but come on, it was the best way!" said Jenny.

"Yeah!" said Katie.

"Look on the bright side, at least you’re not alone anywhere you go now!" said Katie.

I didn't say a single thing back....

"Oh my god, here come Jake!" said Jenny.

My eyes went wide.

He came up to me, "Hey, I heard your the new girl, I'm Jake." He said smiling at me.

"Um...hi, I'm Demonia...." I said.

"That's a cute name, very unique, just like you probably are." said Jake winking at me.

I only blinked at him.

"Well I'll catch you later." said Jake, and he walked away.

"Oh my god! He just talked to you!" said Jenny bouncing up and down.

"See! You can get guys so easily!" said Katie.

"Yeah, if I have money." I said.

"Oh, don't be so NEGATIVE!" said Jenny.

"You know." I said then taking a pause.

"I used to think that you guy's where really good listeners. I felt like you understood how I was feeling, but I finally realized that the reality of it is, you two are just really good actresses, and terrible listeners." I said, and then I simply got up and walked away, quickly. I didn't even look back to see the look on their faces.

I ran into the bathroom, and started crying in the stall. I muffled myself by slamming my face into my purse. I was hoping that would muffle my sniffles, and cries. I'm just beyond upset; I didn't think things could get any worse than before, boy was I wrong. I can't take it; I just can't take it anymore. I can't put my head up high and act like nothing’s wrong, I can't hide how I feel. I run away from a lot of problems, but a lot of the problems I've had lately, I've had no choice but to face. I can't do it anymore...I really can't.

I heard the bell ring, lunch was over, I walked out of the stall and looked in the mirror to see black eye liner on my face, and not where it should be. I quickly turned on the sink to wash my face off.

I ran to my class, but then I noticed the door was locked. This teacher's policy is, "If you’re not in time, don't bother coming, because my door will be locked."
I sighed.
I feel like such a bad girl right now.
I missed a day of school yesterday, and now I was late to my next class.
I could feel the tears dropping down my face again. I was terrible at holding my tears back.
I have too many flaws....

I bit my lip, and looked at the doors, the doors to exiting this school building.
Then I looked at the door I was standing at, and then back at the exit.

I guess it's just one of those days....

Where you just say, the "F" word and it, and just do whatever the heck, you’re thinking of doing.

I ran straight out those doors, and jumped into my car. I drove home, and ran up to my room. I noticed there were new things in my room again.

I sighed.

I stared at myself in the mirror, for a good twenty minutes, next thing you know I'm throwing every single piece of clothing I own, which is a lot, on the floor.

I then went up on my dresser, and took off a small paper, from my fan and jumped off.

I opened up the small paper, that I had made into a little envelope, and opened it; it had two hundred dollars in it.

What was so special about these two hundred dollars?

I EARNED it.

Three months ago, I went to visit my grandma, which is loaded now, because my parents gave her a ton of money. Which means, she has a lot of land, with a fence covering every bit of it. She said that if I painted her fence, she'd give me money. So I did, I earned two hundred dollars, and my parents got mad at her for making me work, and not hiring somebody, but I was so happy, that I worked to earn that money.
I never spent it, only because I wanted to save it, for in case I do something, drastic. Which I didn't think I'd ever do...

I looked in the mirror again; I took out my diamond earrings, and my necklace.

Time to shop, I got in my car, and started driving.

I walked into the store and started looking at clothes.

I needed an outfit, some snacks, and that's about it...

Why I am doing all of this?

....

I'm thinking of running away...

And, I don't want to run away wearing something expensive, that I didn't buy.

I just have a lot of things going on in my mind...

"Will that be all Miss?" said the cash register lady.

"Um...Yes." I said, then grabbed my bag full of the outfit I picked, I then went to the store and got some snacks, then went home.

I walked into my room, and it was a mess.

I sat on my bed, taking a deep breath.

I think I sat there with my eyes shut, all the way till dinner.

Once dinner was over, I was back in my room.

I finally opened the bag, and put on the outfit, it was sort of, two outfits.

It was a black tank, with black skinnies, and then I bought a black dress (nothing fancy), and the reason why I bought two outfits, was just so, if one tore, I wouldn't have skin showing. Everything was on sale, luckily for me...
I would have gotten a pair of shoes to, but I didn't have enough.
It felt kind of weird, not having enough money to pay for something...

I felt good spending those two hundred dollars though, I felt like I spent my own hard earned money on what I needed.

I was basically buying all of this, because, I wanted to leave as much as of the stuff my Father bought me, here.

I put on my black converse, and a light zipped up jacket.

I heard my Father coming up the stairs so I jumped in my bed and covered myself with my blankets.

Maybe I shouldn't run away...
Maybe things will get better now, I mean, I don't think it can get any worse....

My door was slammed wide open.

"Demonia, we're going to have you married to Ryan in December, so be ready." He said and then walked out of my room, and slammed it shut.

My eyes went wide.

I can't believe he just did that! Out of nowhere!

December comes tomorrow...

Wow...um…

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, they get worse.

I felt the tears coming again.

God, I really hate crying, one of these days, I won’t be able to cry anymore.

I got off my bed, opened a drawer which had plastic bags in it.

I took one out and threw the snacks I bought in it.

I took a deep breath, and then I, opened my door slowly, I noticed it was dark, which is good, because it means they are asleep.

I walked slowly down the stairs, punched in the code on the alarm, so that I could open the door without it sounding an alarm.

Once I was outside, I walked onto the curve; I looked left, then right. Then I did that repeatedly for a good two minutes.

I was trying to decide which way I wanted to walk.

I ended up going left...

I was walking, and my heart was beating fast and tears where dripping down my face, but my mind was thinking about everything else, and what I was doing so much, that I couldn't feel the tears dripping off my face. It was a good thing I wore water proof black mascara though...

I think I stopped a good ten times, and turned the other way to go back home, but then I'd stop myself and keep going. I walked for six hours straight, and I walked a good eight miles.
My legs were hurting so much, they were sore, and I was feeling so tired...

So...I went down an ally. I was scared, really scared, I've seen movies where people get killed in it, and robbed....

So I walked quickly, I looked up at the apartments, I saw a ladder, and started climbing it, till I reached the first floor balcony. I was on that floor, but not in the apartment.
They had two long chairs out; you could layout in the sun with these chairs....and sleep...

So...I decided to do exactly that, I laid down on one, it was tan, and black.

I was so scared to fall asleep, but I was way too tired to stay awake....

I hope I wake up before these people see me here....

Within a good two minutes, I was fast asleep.

Dreaming of one thing…

Finding that one special guy that I'll fall in love with, and be with forever....