Sing Me To Sleep

The gig turned out to be a complete success, in the end, free from Alex’s panic attacks and barely any instrumental/equipment cock-ups...

Except for right at the very end. No body had seen Lindsey all night. She had seemed to opt out of sitting at the back with the rest of All Time Low’s friends, and just as Alex and Katy were getting ready to leave, she appeared, drunk and angry.

“Why tha fuck didn’t you come an’ finduh me?” she demanded in a drunken slur.

“I had more pressing matters at hand,” Alex told her, his brows narrowed.

“Like wha’?” Lindsey asked, accidentally spitting. “This whore?” She waved a hand in the general direction of Katy.

“She is not a whore!” Alex exploded quietly. He composed himself and looked back to the drunken girl. “Lindsey, you need to stop. Go home and sleep.”

Lindsey ignored his advice, stumbling closer.

“She is a whore,” Lindsey growled. “First you, then Jack and now this foreign pretty boy,” she hissed, stumbling. “You think she’s some innocent little girl-…”

“Lindsey,” Alex snapped, cutting her off. “I really suggest you go home and sleep whatever this is off, before you say something you regret.”

Lindsey went to say something else, but Alex raised his eyebrows and she stopped, like something was physically stopping her. She let out a frustrated noise, glared at Katy, before turning and storming out of the venue.

Alex sighed, his shoulders slumping. Katy wrapped an arm around his waist.

“You guys can talk when she’s sober,” she reminded him. “It’ll be okay, Alex.”

Alex threw her a weak smile and pulled her out to the car park, where everyone else was waiting. It wasn’t talking to Lindsey he was worried about. It was Lindsey’s harsh words towards Katy. She didn’t respect Alex’s best friend. He knew Lindsey didn’t care a whole lot about him – he knew she was in this for the sex just as much as he was – but he thought she at least cared enough to respect his friends.

But no. And now it was giving him a headache.

“There you guys are!” Jack called, grinning stupidly. Alex rolled his eyes.

“Yes, Jack. Here we are.”

“Shut up,” Jack told him happily. “We’re having a sleepover tomorrow night.”

Alex cocked an eyebrow at the random sentence, and felt Katy’s grip on his arm tighten. Before he had time to ponder what that meant, Jack was talking again.

“Well, me, you two, Cass, and Zack. Rian doesn’t wanna come… Y’know” – Jack looked over his shoulder. Cassadee and Rian were as far apart as possible, Rian by his car and Cassadee by Katy’s – “‘Cause Cass’ll be there.”

Alex nodded, biting his lip.

“Speaking of Rian and Cassadee,” Katy piped up, looking at Jack with big puppy eyes. “Could you do me a huge favour, Jacky?” Katy let go of Alex and cuddled Jack’s arm, trying not to grin. Jack laughed.

“Oh no, Katy; what do you want from me?”

Alex felt jealously in himself again. ‘Calm down, idiot. Whose house is she going to? Yeah. Yours. Calm your shit, Alex.’ Alex told himself as Jack and Katy laughed.

“Alex? Earth to Alex?” Katy waved her hand in front of his face.

“Huh? What?” he asked, blinking. Katy laughed.

“Jack said he’d ride with Rian so you can come in my car. That cool?”

“That’s awesome,” Alex told her, smiling. He turned to Jack. “Thanks, bro.”

“No problem… but I expect you to make sure there are strippers at my funeral if he kills me, Alex. You, personally.”

Alex laughed and clapped Jack on the back.

“Sure, bro,” he falsely promised. They said their goodbyes before the girl and boy made their way over to Katy’s car, where Cassadee, Evan and Zack were waiting. Zack was falling asleep against the car, and Cassadee was giggling with Evan about something.

“Hey,” Katy whispered to Alex before the reached the car. “Would you mind sitting in the back? I need to keep Cassadee away from Evan, me thinks…”

Alex laughed.

“Sure. They love each other. Rian’s just butt-hurt right now.”

Katy nodded, agreeing with Alex.

The reached the car and Katy knocked on Cassadee’s head.

“You’re up front with me,” she told Cassadee simply, before getting in the driver’s seat.

“What?!” Cassadee asked, outraged, sliding into the passenger’s seat none the less.

“You and Rian love each other,” Katy whispered quickly before the others got in, who were still laughing and joking outside the car. “I’m not going to let you fuck it up.”

Cassadee opened her mouth to protest, but Katy shot her a warning glance at the others began to pile into the car.

“God, Alex, you’re such a fat fuck!” Zack grumbled loudly from the back seat. “Katy, why didn’t you put Cass in the back with us? She’s tiny!”

“Shut up, Zachary,” Katy told him, starting the engine and pulling out of the parking space.

“But-…”

“Zack; shut up!” Alex muttered, punching the black-and-blonde haired boy. He wriggled his hips in the confined space, causing Zack to growl, Evan just to look mildly uncomfortable and annoyed. It pleased Alex that Evan was uncomfortable. Alex was shameless enough not to be embarrassed by that pleasure.

First they dropped off Zack, who was whinging like an injured animal. Then it was Evan, who leaned forward into the front of the car as he got out, kissing the top of Katy’s head and scruffing Cassadee’s hair up. Cassadee grinned, and Katy shot her a warning glance. Then they went to drop Cassadee off.

“Huh?” Cassadee blurted out as they went in the direction of her house. “’Lex’s is closer…”

Katy blushed, and focused on driving.

“She’s staying at mine tonight,” Alex informed her. “Problem, Cassadee?”

Cassadee ignored Alex’s tone and looked to her best friend questioningly. Katy blushed harder, and didn’t look at Cassadee until she’d parked on the curb outside the Pope residence. When she did look at Cass, the girl’s expression was livid. Katy offered her a small smile, but she ignored it, clambering out of the car and slamming the door hard. She walked up to the house without so much as a second glance.

Alex squeezed through the small gap in between the front two seats and, finally, settled himself in the passenger seat. Katy rolled her eyes at him, and he grinned sheepishly at her.

“Ever heard of doors, dear?” she asked, pulling off the curb once Alex had his belt on.

“No,” Alex responded quickly, deflecting her jibe. “What was up with Cass just now?”

Katy frowned. She was pretty sure Cassadee was mad with her because, in Cassadee’s mind, Katy was letting Alex get away with breaking her heart. Which wasn’t the case. At all.

“Not sure,” Katy mumbled. “She’s probably pissed I didn’t let her sit in the back”.

“Cassadee’s weird,” Alex decided, leaning back in his seat and shuffling before placing his arms behind his head.

Katy and Alex headed back to Katy’s briefly to grab her pyjamas and toothbrush before making the drive to Alex’s. When they were a block or so away Alex piped up with another destination in mind.

“The park? Are you serious? We haven’t been there for, like, a fucking year or something,” Katy told him, yawning. “I’m so tired, ‘Lex…”

“C’mon!” Alex whined, giving Katy his best puppy-eyes. Katy rolled her own and agreed, making a turn and heading toward the children’s park half-way through the route from Alex’s to Katy’s.

Katy stopped the car in a space in the small car park built into the children’s play area. She shot a glance at Alex.

“Can we please stay in the car? It’s too cold outside.” Alex smiled slightly and agreed.

“Let’s get in the back though,” he suggested, and they squeezed into the back without leaving the car, giggling and whining and getting elbows in faces. When they were finally settled – Katy’s small form snuggled next to Alex’s taller – Alex rested his head on top of Katy’s. He glanced down, and noticed a frown upon the younger girl’s lips.

“Cheer up,” he mockingly scolded, poking her cheek gently. She exaggerated the expression, and then stuck her tongue out when Alex scrunched his face up.

“Seriously, though, Kate; what’s with all the frowning lately?” The dark-haired boy pushed the corner of the girl’s lips up, leaving his finger there a little longer than necessary to savour the feeling of her soft skin under his fingers. Lindsey could never compare.

Katy just shrugged, before saying, “I don’t know…”

“Liar,” Alex retorted quickly. “You so know what the matter is and you won’t tell me! I’m heartbroken, Katy; heart-broke-en.”

Katy laughed and looked up at Alex from their close embrace. He smiled sadly at her, and she looked down again.

“Katy,” Alex started afresh, “you know you can tell me anything… anything at all. You could tell me… I dunno, you could tell me you were a fucking gay-ass Twilight vampire, and I wouldn’t care; I’d still love you,” he told her with a light grin. It wasn’t full-blown because Katy would only take his love for best friend love… And that it was, but there so much more to it than that.

Katy’s heart fluttered a little when Alex told her he loved her. She knew he meant in the way he loved the rest of their friends, but she longed for him to tell her he was in love with her, and longed to tell him she loved him too.

Instead, she quietly replied, “I know, ‘Lex.”

Alex frowned. How could he get the truth out of her? Cassadee knew. He had a sneaking suspicion that Jack knew… Or was part of the reason? Why wouldn’t she tell Alex?

“Katy, please,” he begged. He knew it was wrong to try and force her into telling him what she clearly did not want him to know, but Alex was selfish – and he was well aware of that trait. So he continued. “I really wanna know what’s going on inside my best friend’s head!”

Katy bit her lip and looked up at Alex. Could she tell him? In a way that didn’t tell him… She could pretend to be talking about another boy, and if Alex asked who she’d just say they didn’t know each other…

“I’m in love,” she admitted in a mumble, eyeing Alex subtly for his reaction. Katy thought she saw something flash in his eyes… but quickly dismissed it. ‘Wishful thinking,’ she decided quickly.

It wasn’t wishful thinking, however. Alex’s heart had just shattered, and he was quickly trying to sweep away the sharp, broken pieces before Katy noticed.

“Wow, Katy,” Alex began, shaking slightly, “way to keep a secret!” Although he was teasing, it was just a façade. He really wanted to just ask who the hell she was in love with.

“Yeah, I guess,” Katy mumbled. “Cass said it was obvious, though.” The younger teenager grimaced as she picked at her nails.

‘So Cass knows who it is?’ Alex thought. ‘And it’s obvious to her… So she must hang out with Katy and him a lot.’ The cogs in Alex’s brain were turning at lightning speed, which was unusual for him. ‘Cass and Katy hang out with our group a lot… so it could be Jack…’ The singer mentally tripped over his supposed-best friend’s name. He didn’t even know if they were friends anymore, or not. ‘Or I guess it could be Evan. Cass crashes their hang time a lot…’ So far, Alex had two theories. Both were completely wrong and surpassed the obvious – being that Alex was also in the group, and that Katy acted weird around him sometimes. But he was Alex, and so he wasn’t always logical. He blurted out his thoughts.

“Is it Jack?” he spluttered, looking down at Katy. Katy stared back at him like he was on some kind of illegal drug.

“Jack?!” she asked incredulously. “Why the hell do you think it’s Jack?”

Alex shrugged. He should’ve felt embarrassed by Katy’s reaction – but he wasn’t. He was just so glad that it wasn’t the younger boy. But there was still one more candidate.

“Well…,” Alex began, “is it Evan?”

Katy blushed. Alex’s heart sank.

“No,” she mumbled, playing with her fingers. Alex cocked an eyebrow. “It is seriously not Evan! Seriously! Y-you don’t know the guy…”

“Why did you blush then?” Alex asked with raised eyebrows.

“We kissed. Once,” Katy admitted, speaking at a million-words-per-minute. “Because I’d never been kissed before, okay?” Katy’s face was tomato-coloured now. Alex grinned crookedly. So it really was someone he didn’t know. His smile faltered. That actually kind of made it worse. Who was this brilliant boy deserving of Katy’s affection?! Alex wished he could get a look at him, figure out the parts that Katy loved and…

But what would Alex do? Copy him? That idea was weak in Alex’s mind. Katy may not have liked him like that, but Alex liked who he was. He didn’t think himself bad looking. He was fairly skinny – barely muscular, but definitely not fat. He knew his hair was nice.

So why did Katy not love him? Was it arrogant of him to question that? Alex didn’t know. He just knew that he liked being where he was, with his best friend in his arms, cuddling and joking and talking. Katy was his best friend before anything else, but he didn’t know how much longer he could smother his feelings. He made a joke to make himself feel better.

“So, why is this tool not in love with you back, eh? Direct me to him. I’ll make him know what’s good for him!”

Katy chuckled lightly.

“I don’t think that will be necessary, ‘Lex.”

“Why not?” Alex asked.

“Well, one, it would be mean, two, you would ruin his handsome face” - she smirked before continuing – “and three… Well, I’d never force him to feel the same. It’s not fair, and I don’t expect it of him.”

Alex was quiet for a few moments.

“Damn, Katy. Who the fuck is this guy? He sounds like freakin’… I dunno, Jesus or some shit!”

“He’s very important to me,” Katy murmured, playing with the hem of her shirt. Alex pondered this for a moment.

“How come I don’t know him?”

“Alex,” Katy snapped. “Drop it.”

Her harsh tone caught him off-guard, and he stuttered out an ‘okay’ before shrinking in on himself. Katy snuggled into him, her nose against his jugular.

“Just…” Alex began shakily. He closed his eyes and continued. “Just promise you won’t forget about me?” He was quiet; embarrassed at being snapped at.

“How and why would I ever forget you?” Katy asked with fatigue evident in her voice. “You’ll always be my number one, ‘Lex, you ass. But I promise not to forget you.”

“Never?” he asked timidly, stroking her soft hair nervously.

“Never,” she vowed with a yawn, humming in content when Alex’s thumb stroked her cheek. He kissed the top of her hair.

“Well, unless I get amnesia,” she amended. Alex chucked.

“I fucking love you.”

“Good,” Katy grinned. She yawned again. “Come on. Let’s go back to your house so we can sleep.”

Alex nodded, and they began the laugh-filled scramble back into the front of the car.