Sing Me To Sleep

Awake.

Alex’s eyes shot open, his nightmare quickly fading as the moonlight splayed a bright, white strip across his face. He breathed out heavily through his nose, his head throbbing and his senses groggy. It took him a couple of seconds to remember where he was, and then he looked around. His eyes lastly landed on Katy, who was snuggled into his side as much as she cool be, faint tear tracks visible on her face and her left wrist cradled to her chest. Alex’s heart sunk when the memories flooded back.

He lifted a shaking hand and hooked his index and middle finger around the cuff of the long, grey sleeve. Katy stirred and he gasped quickly, ceasing any movement and watching the odd face Katy made. She shuffled in her sleep and pressed her lips against Alex’s shoulder, a faint smile adorning her lips before it started to fade.

Alex smiled at the peaceful look on her face before it disappeared and he started to move the sleeve again.

Alex had to stop himself from vomiting right there and then. The lines on Katy’s arms were violent red against the moon-bleached skin of her arm. Some of the cuts were oozing a little blood, and Alex wondered vaguely if she had cut herself after everyone had fallen asleep. Then he cursed himself for falling asleep and not stopping her.

His index finger ghosted over one of the still-bleeding cuts, little pieces of his heart breaking off and falling into the deep, dark pit of his stomach, churning around in a way that made him feel unbearably sick.

He pulled the sleeve back up; noticing the little droplets of blood staining the fabric, before averting his eyes to Katy’s sleeping face. She looked so happy; peaceful. Why would she do this?

He absently stroked her cheek whilst he thought back to Jack and Cassadee’s rushed but emotional conversation earlier.

“She cuts her fucking arms open! And for what? For him! Because he doesn’t love her; because he leads her on.”

Alex’s blood boiled. That boy. If he could get his hands on him right now, he’d beat him until he was begging for Katy’s forgiveness.

He couldn’t be here right now. He couldn’t be near Katy. He knew if she woke up he’d scream at her for being so stupid, he’d demand to know who the fuck the guy was and where he could find him. He knew Katy would hate him for that.

But how could she be so stupid?! Katy didn’t love Alex, but Alex wasn’t cutting himself up over it – well, literally, anyway. How could she hold sharp objects so close to her skin? How could she plunge them in? Alex’s head felt hazy just thinking about it. He didn’t want to know the answer.

He pulled Katy closer briefly, pressing a long kiss to the top of her head before whispering, “I love you” and getting up. He grabbed his bag and was out of the front door, silent as anything, within three minutes.

His heart ached for the sleeping girl inside the house, but he knew he’d had to leave just then. It was for his own good as well as hers.

He’d talk to her tomorrow (or later today, rather) when he’d calmed down enough. He’d just tell everyone he’d had to get up and go home early to do an assignment. No one would know.

Except Jack Barakat, of course.

Jack had woken up at the sound of Alex’s gasp. He was a light sleeper, and he had watched Alex the entire time – pulling down Katy’s sleeve, stewing in his own thoughts, pulling Katy close to him and whispering something in her unconscious ear.

What was he saying? Jack didn’t have time to process this as Alex jumped up, grabbed his bag and left. Alex was gone. Because he’d seen Katy’s cuts.

He woke up Cassadee.

~

Katy woke up to an empty space beside her. She blinked, noting Alex’s bag had gone as well. A quick glance to the clock told her it was only seven in the morning. Alex had left, without saying goodbye to anyone. Cassadee and Jack had guilty faces that just screamed they knew why. Katy started to panic.

“W-where’s ‘Lex?” she tried to ask casually.

“Uh…” Jack began, trying to think up an excuse. Cassadee cut in before he could, though.

“We don’t know. He wasn’t here when we woke up either, and Zack’s out for the count.” She said it with an angry hint to her tone, her arms folded hard against her body. Jack rolled his eyes.

All Katy could say was ‘oh’.

There was silence between the three for a few minutes, the only sound in the room Zack’s snoring. Katy sniffed and stood up.

“I… I have to g-go,” she mumbled, tying her hair up quickly and pulling a hoody over her pyjama top. Cassadee looked up with fearful eyes.

“What? Why? Katy, don’t-…”

“Shut up, Cassadee,” she muttered bitterly, stuffing her things into her backpack before hiking it onto her shoulders. “I’m fucking sick of you sticking your nose into my business. Sort out your own fucking life before you try to sort out mine.”

She stormed from the house, leaving Cassadee crying and Jack gaping after her. A moment later he turned to Cassadee and enveloped her in a bone-crushing hug.

“Shh, Cass,” Jack mumbled, rocking the crying girl. “She didn’t mean it. She’s really not well. You know that.”

Cassadee shook her head, trying to get the sobs to subside before spluttering, “I know that. That’s why I’m crying. Jack, she really needs help. What the hell are we gonna do?”

Jack frowned at the distraught teenager before him. He really didn’t know.