Sing Me To Sleep

‘Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck,’ Alex Gaskarth thought upon first waking. His head was throbbing and he could tell without looking in the mirror that his chocolate brown hair was a fucking bird’s nest. He opened his eyes groggily and stared at the ceiling, the sunlight almost burning his dark irises and the pupils within them. He was just thinking about the aspirin, the exact location of the pills he was longing for (third shelf, behind the floss but in front of the packet of condoms, in his medicine cabinet in his en suite) when he felt someone shift beside him. He froze, hoping that it was at least Lindsey and not some random girl. His prayers were answered when the girl beside him leant up and pressed a kiss to his jaw line, whispering, “Morning, sexy” in a voice that definitely belonged to his girlfriend, Lindsey Clarke.

He sighed in relief, and Lindsey misinterpreted it, giggling. She disappeared beneath the cover, kissing down his torso, down his treasure trail before she dipped her thumbs into the elasticised waist of his boxer shorts. Alex glanced over to the alarm clock next to his bed, and considered that this was a bad idea seeing as it was six thirty in the morning and his mother or father could’ve walked in at any time. Still, that thought was wiped from his mind as Lindsey licked a long, moist stripe up his dick, stealing a groan from the now-nude boy.

Ten minutes later and Lindsey was dressed in her attire for the day – a form-hugging vest top and equally skin-groping skinny jeans. She grinned crookedly at the seemingly-satisfied boy on the bed, the alcohol still clearly running through her veins as she tripped over thin air. Alex stretched, and Lindsey called out a goodbye as she left his room, promising to see him in second period that day at school. Alex disregarded this – he wasn’t all that bothered about seeing Lindsey. He dated her because… because she was there. She’d asked. She distracted him from her. No, not Lindsey – Katy. Well, that was a lie. Lindsey didn’t distractAlex, per se, more… substituted. No, no. That still sounded wrong. Lindsey could easily sound like Katy, Alex figured. Yeah, long shot, he knew. He kind of counted on the ‘y’ to save him. Lindsey never seemed to really notice, anyway. Alex could pretend she was Katy… but the girls were next to nothing alike. Lindsey could never compare to Katy.

Alex sighed and began to get up.

The first things on were his skinny jeans. He didn’t bother changing his underwear – truth be told, he wasn’t really sure if there was any clean underwear in his room, and Lindsey’s morning blow job hadn’t completely ridden him of his headache.

He walked into his en suite and brushed his teeth, tugging at his eyes and inspecting their level of bloodshot as he brushed his uneven teeth. He sighed as he let go of the skin, the bags clearly showing under his dark-brown eyes. Alex opened the medicine cabinet, deflecting his reflection for a moment to find the bottle of aspirin.

He dry swallowed two before shutting the mirrored cupboard and stepping back into his bedroom, searching with his eyes for a clean t-shirt. He spied one without stains on it slung on his dresser. He shrugged and slipped it on, sniffing it on its way down over his torso. Alex grinned, and stared blankly around the room, feeling like he’d forgotten something.

Cell phone.

It clicked in his head and he picked it up from underneath his pillow, grabbing his house key from the bedside table on his way.

Waking up for Katy Ross was something completely different, yet very similar, to her best friend, Alexander Gaskarth. For a start, when Katy woke up, she too was displeased and in pain, though opted for ‘Crap’, rather than ‘Fuck’. She did not wake up next to a naked ‘significant other’, though. Katy woke up alone; the whole house was empty. An only child, Katy’s father had left her mother for a more adventurous life, leaving Katy’s mother to work overtime just to keep the two afloat and consequently was never there in the mornings.

Katy often, if not always, wished she were waking up next to her best male friend. However, this was never the case.

Instead of morning oral sex, Katy did something else to give her a high. Quite different to that of an orgasm, yet something that she craved just as much as Alex craved a pair of lips in the morning.

She cut herself.

Katy’s waking-up-pain was different to Alex’s. Hers wasn’t induced by drinking too much alcohol the night before – no; it was induced by loving someone she shouldn’t; loving someone she couldn’t have – induced by being alone. Alex had his girlfriend’s mouth and aspirin; Katy had her razor blades. Every morning, after she woke up, Katy pulled the blades in neat lines across her wrists, smiling ruefully as the blood trickled down her forearms before settling in her cupped palms. That morning was no different, and, after the wounds had stopped bleeding so profusely, she cleaned and gauzed them, smiling at her handy work.

Katy knew she was probably insane. She was too far gone to care anymore. The thought of seeing Alex’s face stopped her from cutting too deep, although the thought of seeing Alex attached to Lindsey’s face during lunch almost made her over-cut. It wasn’t just that Lindsey had Alex and Katy didn’t. It was something else as well...

She then straightened her long hair to a point, ruffling it over her face, and then continued to hide behind her make-up, though she only wore it very lightly. Then she picked out a long-sleeved shirt, to cover her arms, a pair of denim skinny jeans.

Katy was the designated driver. She lived the furthest away from school, but passed everybody’s houses to school. Except, she didn’t pick up everybody – her friend Rian drove his girlfriend and her best girl friend, Cassadee, to school every morning. Katy picked up Zack, Jack and Alex. It sort of pleased Katy that she was the one to take Alex to school – not Lindsey… but then she felt petty for thinking so and often added an extra cut to the collection on her arms.

First she picked up Jack, who screamed ‘shotgun’ as soon as he left the house. Katy laughed, and greeted her male friend with a nod as he got into the car. They began discussing gigs, both for the boys’ band All Time Low and others, like Good Charlotte and Blink-182. That was one of the main reasons Katy and Cassadee had been accepted into their group so avidly – their taste in music.

Then it was Zack’s turn to clamber into the car with his skateboard in tow. He stuck his head between the seats and talked animatedly to the other two.

Then it was time to pick up Katy’s favourite person in the entire world – Alexander Gaskarth.
From outside, a car horn honked. Alex took one last look in the mirror, flattening his already-straight hair before bolting down the stairs, down his drive and onto the sidewalk, where his best friend, Katy Ross (who was, Alex was pretty sure, the love of his life he’d never get to experience), had parked her tiny little car. He smiled warmly at her before the one and only Jack Barakat bobbed his long face up. Alex frowned at the sight of his other best friend. Grumbling, Alex got in the back of the car.

“Jack, why are you always fucking riding shotgun?” Alex asked, clearly irritated, before greeting Zack with a knuckle bump.

“Hey, nice to see you too, bro,” said Jack sarcastically, twisting around in his seat so he could look at the elder boy. Alex made a face and turned to Katy, who was focusing on the road she was now driving down.

“Hey, Katy,” he greeted her. She looked up into the rear-view mirror and smiled shyly.

“Hey, ‘Lex,” she replied before focusing her eyes back on the road.

Katy was shy by nature. Even though she and Alex were best friends, as close as two people could be, she was still shy around him when she first saw him each day. Same with the rest of the group: Jack, Rian, Cassadee and Zack… and Lindsey. Lindsey. Lindsey didn’t really count as part of the group. No body really liked her, not even really Alex, but no body knew that, especially not Lindsey… the girl who bullied the actual love of Alex’s life, Katy… the bullying that he had no idea occurred.

Conversation flowed between the four easily, and soon talk turned to the gig on Friday for All Time Low.

“Oh!” Katy exclaimed, remembering something. “One of you is going to have to drive to the gig with Cass and Ri,” she told them, glancing up into the rear view mirror. “’Cause Evan’s gonna come.”

Alex’s mind burned. Evan. Alex hated the eighteen-year-old Finnish boy. Yes, it was unreasonable. He was extremely attractive – and also very close friends with Katy. Alex knew he himself was Katy’s best friend – but he didn’t want that. He thought he saw something in Katy’s eyes every time she looked at the tall, elder boy. He wanted her to look at him like that. He was 99.9% sure she never would.

“I am not riding with Ri and Cass!” Jack announced at once. “Have you been in a car with them? No. I refuse! I also call shotgun for Friday night.”

“You can’t do that!” Alex protested, his eyes narrowing at Jack. Jack just stuck his tongue out and grinned evilly at Alex.

“You know what,” Zack began. “I’ll ride with Cass and Ri. There’s no way I am going to be witness to Alex taking Jack’s face off just because he wants to ride shotgun.”

Katy laughed, and thanked Zack. Katy actually wanted Alex to ride up front with her, but it would look kind of odd to disallow Jack to do what he had been doing for the past four years, since they’d all became friends. At least, Katy thought someone would notice… thought someone would notice, and immediately connect it to her being in love with Alex.

Love makes you paranoid.

“How about I sort this right now?” Katy suggested, and Alex and Jack looked at her with curiosity. She smirked. “Evan will ride up front with me, and you two can bicker in the back like an old married couple? Sound good? Does to me.”

Alex’s stomach twisted with jealously. He knew he was being irrational – of course he did – but he didn’t care. Or rather, he did, but he couldn’t stop it so he just went with it.

“Katy!” Jack whined, extending the 'Y'.

“Jack!” Katy mimicked, extending the ‘A’. Jack pouted and stuck his tongue out at her before slumping in his seat and crossing his arms over his backpack.

“Jacky, you know I love you,” Katy told him in a baby voice. Jack sniffed.

“Jack!” Katy whined as Dulanely High School began to come into view. “Forgive me, baby. I’ll bring you a pop tart tomorrow morning?” Alex’s stomach burned at something as trivial as Katy calling Jack ‘baby’. She never calls me that…

Jack’s face lit up and he nodded enthusiastically.

“I love you, Ross,” he beamed, using the girl’s last name.

“Good.” Katy laughed and parked the car, and the four friends continued to get out of the car, Zack and Katy bidding their goodbyes to the other two (Zack, Cassadee and Katy were the grade below Alex, Rian and Jack) and disappearing to their lockers. Alex punched Jack on the shoulder on the way through the main entrance.

“Ow,” Jack whinged, rubbing his arm. “What the fuck was that for?” Alex just glared straight ahead and stormed to his locker, stamping the combination to the lock in. Jack leaned against the locker next to Alex’s, giving his best friend evils and continuing to rub his arm.

“Are you on your man period again, ‘Lex?” Jack asked, and before Alex could bark at him, Jack corrected himself. “Oh, I’m sorry – that’s all the time.” Jack sniffed and turned to lean his back against the locker, grinning and waving at Michelle Jones as she walked past before leaning his check on the cool metal to look at Alex. “Seriously, what the fuck is up with you? You’ve been acting like a complete bitch recently.” Alex sighed. Jack was his best friend, and he shouldn’t be taking this out on him. It was just… ever since he had started dating Lindsey Katy had distanced herself from him ever so slightly. Not much, but enough to make Alex notice.

“It’s nothing,” Alex assured him, closing his locker gently. He looked at Jack. “Sorry for punching you,” he mumbled.

“No biggy, bro. Just don’t do it again or I’ll have to make you into tinned meat.” Alex snorted.

“Hey, I could totally turn you into mince meat!” Jack argued, crossing his arms.

“Sure you could, Jack,” Alex reassured him, patting the taller boy on the back.

“Bitch.”

“Cock sucker.”

“Your dad seems to enjoy it.”

Alex made a face at Jack before both boys set off to start their school day.