Sing Me To Sleep

Cassadee glared at her best friend from across the table. It was third period now and they were teamed up in their Food Theory lesson.

“Cassadee! Seriously!” Katy was feeling intensely uncomfortable. She had known the younger girl wouldn’t let it go. She sighed and wrote down some ingredients she needed for the next Food Practical lesson.

“Tell me why you do it!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Katy responded quickly, glancing at Cassadee for a second. The petite girl looked like she was going to explode, and Katy would have laughed if not for the topic they were discussing.

“You know very well what I’m talking about,” Cassadee hissed leaning over the table and pushing Katy’s pen down. Her face softened when Katy looked up at her sadly. “Sweetie, I’m just worried about you! I want to help you.”

“Cassadee,” Katy began, “the only thing you can help me with is this lesson, and to do that you can be quiet whilst I write down what Godfrey is saying!”

Cassadee pouted.

“Stop doing that,” Katy requested. “You’re Cassadee. You don’t frown.” She laughed and dotted an ‘i’ on her paper.

“Katy,” Cassadee persisted, a serious look plastered to her face and completely ignoring Katy’s comment. “What you’re doing isn’t normal.” Katy glanced up and met Cassadee’s eyes, her expression serious now too.

“Cassadee… stop,” Katy asked. She was tired of trying to distract Cassadee. Her eyes went back to her work.

“How could I live with myself if I ignored the fact you’re cutting yourself?” Although her voice dropped several sound levels lower, Katy still hissed at her to shut up. If anybody found out… she’d be the school freak. Alex would hate her. What would Jack think? Zack, Rian? Evan?

Evan would stick by her. Katy was sure of that. He was the big brother she’d never had, the boy who would be there for her through thick and thin. It was some kind of silent agreement between them. He was the only person who meant the entire world to her, other than Alex and Cassadee.

Evan had moved over to America from Finland after his sixteenth birthday. Katy had been talking to him since she was twelve and he was fourteen – they were internet pen-pals. The dating issue had never really been an issue with them. At twelve, Katy wasn’t interested in the opposite sex all that much, and even though Evan was, he thought himself too old for twelve year olds. So they became close friends, and when Evan moved to America when he was sixteen and Katy was fourteen, he moved to her town and completed two years of high school at Dulaney with her. It was the year Alex had bought her the opal ring…

Katy’s heart broke at the thought of her most-prized possession floating through the excrement of the students at her school. She had loved that ring almost as much as Alex, because he had given it to her. Now it was gone, and Alex would be glad of that fact.

She slumped forward in her seat, her heart heavy and her mind a million miles away from Cassadee’s previous question.

“Katy,” Cassadee pressed. “Katy.” She looked up, silently telling her that she was listening.

“I just… I don’t want to lose you.” Katy’s heart sunk lower as a few tears escaped Cassadee’s eyes. Pretty soon she was sobbing and Katy felt absolutely terrible.

“Cass…” Katy dropped down from her stool and walked over to the other small girl. Miss Godfrey had stopped talking by now, and everyone was deep in their own conversations. “Cass, please don’t cry.” She wrapped her arms around her. Cassadee hugged her tightly back.

“I couldn’t stand to lose you, okay?” Cassadee whimpered into Katy’s neck. “Who else would I bitch with about that slut at McDonalds?” Katy laughed and Cassadee laughed back feebly. Rian worked at McDonalds, and every time any of the group went over to make fun, there was always a bleach-blonde bimbo there, falling off Rian’s every word. She’d even driven to his house one time and sat outside, telling him so on AIM through her phone. Even though it creeped Rian the fuck out and didn’t have eyes for anybody else anyway, Cassadee still felt threatened and it was frequent for the two girls to bitch about Barbie, as they unoriginally called her.

“You won’t lose me, okay?” Katy whispered in her best girlfriend’s ear. “I know what I’m doing, Cass. I’m not trying to kill myself. Just know that much, okay?”

Cassadee pulled her head back to look into Katy’s tired eyes.

“Then why?”

Katy looked around the room, as if suddenly aware the two girls weren’t alone. She thought she was wrong – all the students were too busy with all their own work – but then she met Zachary Merrick’s questioning eyes from across the classroom.

“Let’s talk about it later,” she mumbled, breaking the contact with Zack, and scooted back into her stool.

“Okay,” she agreed. “But we will talk about it, Miss Ross.” Katy made a face and stuck her tongue out, before going back to her work.

Cassadee met Zack’s eyes across the room and her eyes flashed at him. He bit his lip, concern for his friend building up in his mind. He had no idea what was going on, and he didn’t think anybody would tell him. So he text Jack again.

man, i dnt no wats goin on. cass just starting crying! CRYING!

Jack looked down at his phone speculatively. Cassadee? Crying? Jack knew the last time Cassadee had cried and that was when Alex’s brother had…

“Who is texting you, god dammit?” Alex asked, craning his neck at the right angle to look at Jack’s phone. Jack quickly slipped the device back into his pocket and glared at Alex.

“None of your business,” Jack retorted, turning back to his French work. Alex had come in about twenty minutes late to the lesson, flushed and grinning and as egotistical as ever, apologising quickly to the female teacher in suave French before sitting down next to his best friend. Jack didn’t have to ask to know he’d been with Lindsey.

Alex pouted at Jack. Jack just raised his eyebrows.

“Fuck off, ‘Lex. It’s seriously none of your business.”

“Is it a girl?” A cocky grin appeared on the singer’s lips. Jack narrowed his eyes at his work.

“No, it is not a girl,” Jacked replied calmly. “It’s your dad.” Alex narrowed his eyes at the taller boy.

“Fucker,” he muttered a minute or so later when he couldn’t think up a reply. Jack grinned triumphantly and wrote down the wrong word in French. Alex smirked and ‘forgot’ to tell him. It was petty, but it satisfied Alex.

After another half an hour of banter and severely incorrect conversations in French, the bell for lunch went. Jack and Alex shot up, eager to get to lunch, but both for very different reasons.

Alex was keen to see Katy. This was more often than not the case at lunch, and Alex felt no shame in running straight up to his best friend and hugging her tightly.

Jack, however, was keen to know what the fuck was going on with the two girls; Cassadee crying and Katy acting weird? It was really irking Jack to not know what was going on – he was the nosiest of the group, and was kind of proud of that fact, and proud that he was the one who always knew what was going on.

Both boys were disappointed, however, when they arrived at the table to Zack and Rian, but no Cassadee or Katy.

“Where are the girls?” Jack asked almost immediately. Neither Rian nor Zack pointed out that this was a rude greeting – Zack had obviously filled Rian in on the fact his girlfriend had been crying.

“I don’t know,” Zack told him honestly. “I tried to catch up to them after third, but Katy grabbed Cassadee and pulled her away and I lost them as soon as they were out the door.”

Jack bit down on his lip and sat down at the table. Alex sat down too, but slowly, looking confused.

“Am I missing something here?” he asked, looking between his friends. They all looked at him. Then Zack looked at Jack.

“You didn’t mention anything to him?”

Jacked rubbed the back of his neck before replying, “I knew he’d worry too much about Katy.”

“Uh, hello?!” Alex interrupted. “Let’s stop talking like I’m not here, and somebody please tell me what is going on with Katy and Cass?” He looked frantically between the three. ‘Why am I always the last to know?’ Alex grumbled in his head. Then something clicked.

“Wait, what? Why would I worry about Katy?” Alex’s voice rang several octaves higher. “Can somebody fucking answer me?” He half-rose of his seat; his eyes frantically flicking between Rian, Jack and Zack.

“Chill out, bro,” Zack told him, placing a reassuring hand on his upper arm. Alex sat down again. “Katy came in late to Biology this morning with Cassadee, after Cass when to the toilet. I figure Cass found her along the way, but they were both frowning when they came into class, and…”

“Cassadee doesn’t frown,” Alex said in unison with Zack. Alex’s bottom lip jutted out whilst he thought.

“Yeah, but not just that…” Zack interrupted Alex’s thought process. “Cassadee was crying in third. Her and Katy looked like they were arguing, and Cass just started full on crying. It was weird.” Alex nodded thoughtfully, his eyes floating over to Rian, whose brow was furrowed.

Cassadee was Rian’s princess, however cheesy it sounded. He adored her… Cassadee wore the pants in their relationship. They’d started dating about a year after the group become one, which was about three years ago when Cassadee was thirteen and Rian was fourteen. Rian had had a crush on Cassadee since the day they’d met, but Cassadee didn’t realise that she liked Rian until he asked her out shyly one day when they were in Jack’s basement and everybody else had ran outside to chase after the ice cream truck. She’d accepted his offer by tackling him to the ground and practically eating his face off. The others had come back, laughing and joking with ice cream all over their mouths to find Cassadee and Rian making out on the battered old sofa at the back of the room. No body had been surprised.

“I’m sure she’s fine, bro,” Alex reassured Rian, smiling at him. Rian just nodded and continued to stare into space with a furrowed brow. Alex sighed and looked down at his lap, before noticing the shape of his cell in his pocket. He pulled it out and text Katy.

where r u? :(

Cassadee and Katy stopped bickering in whispers when Katy’s phone beeped. She slipped the phone out of her pocket and read the message.

“It’s Alex,” Katy muttered. “He wants to know where I am.”

Cassadee glared at Katy. Katy stared blankly back.

“What?”

“Are you doing this because of Alex? Because I swear to God Katy, that is so fucking-…”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Katy exclaimed. In her mind, little alarm bells went off. Alex was a part of the reason, albeit not the complete reason, but still, he was a part… a large part… but why did Cassadee suspect that? Cassadee didn’t know Katy was in love with Alex. No body but Katy did. She suspected that Lindsey had some inkling, but not of the grand scale.

“Why would I do…” - Katy gulped – “this, over Alex?”

Cassadee stared at Katy in disbelief. Katy started to feel paranoid. ‘Why is she staring at me like that?’ Katy questioned herself, biting on her lip.

Silence enveloped the small bathroom on the ground floor for a couple of minutes before Cassadee spoke again.

“Come on, Katy. I’m your best friend. You think I don’t know?!”

“Know what?!” Katy’s heart rate increased rapidly. ‘Just bluff your way out of this… it’ll be okay, you’ll be fine…’

Then Cassadee spoke the words Katy really, really didn’t want her to.

“I know you’re in love with Alex, Katy. I can see it when you look at him, or when you talk about him.” Her voice sounded sympathetic; pitying. Katy didn’t want her pity. She felt her eyes fill and spill over with angry tears. How dare she pity Katy? How dare she?!

At that moment, a ninth grader entered the bathroom and looked at the two tenth graders with saucer eyes. The tension between the pair was great, and the small girl sensed it before she started to back up.

“No, no!” Cassadee started, putting her hands up. “We’re just leaving, okay?” Cassadee grabbed Katy’s wrist and pulled her past the young girl, out into the corridor.

The two walked in silence as they headed before the cafeteria. Katy thought she was off the hook, but just before they turned a corner to enter the large room, Cassadee whispered, “I’m coming over later, and we’re talking about this” before plastering a smile onto her face and dragging Katy over to the boys at their usual table.