Sing Me To Sleep

Cassadee sat on Rian’s lap, whilst Katy ignored the seat next to Alex to sit next to Jack instead. If Katy had looked up, she would have seen the hurt look on Alex’s face. He quickly hid it, however, and looked subtly at Katy, who was staring at the table with an emotionless face. He leaned forward on the table on crossed arms.

“What’s the matter, Katy?” Alex asked, trying to sound casual but failing.

“Nothing,” she mumbled, sounding less than convincing. She faked a smile at him, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about it, ‘Lex.”

He furrowed his eyebrows and watched Jack shuffle closer to Katy.

Rian was fussing over Cassadee, who was assuring him she was fine. It was starting to piss Alex off, mainly because he couldn’t fuss over Katy, and she couldn’t reassure him she was fine in his ear in her sweet voice.

She didn’t look fine, though.

Jack had his face close to hers, and Alex saw his lips moving but didn’t hear any words because the younger boy was speaking so quietly. He saw Katy’s eyes fill with tears, and saw what he guessed was Jack grabbing one of her hands under the table.

He was so jealous of Jack right now, and that was wrong. He shouldn’t be feeling jealous. He should be glad that his friend was comforting her when she was upset.

He just wasn’t. Plus he couldn’t stop thinking about why Katy hadn’t sat next to him. Why had she sat next to Jack? Did she like Jack or something? After all, she always let him ride shotgun.

The jealously was burning Alex’s skin when Zack interrupted his silent loathing of his lanky Lebanese friend.

“Well, you’re all being unresponsive assholes,” Zack concluded, standing up. “I’ll see you guys later.”

Alex followed the bassist with his eyes before returning them to Cassadee, Rian, Jack and Katy. None of them seemed to have noticed Zack’s departure, and Alex was feeling like a fifth wheel.

‘Where’s my fucking chick?’ he grumbled in his head. He sighed heavily and pushed his chair out from the table, eyes glued to the floor as he made to walk away from the four people so grossly unaware of him.

“Alex?” a quiet voice said behind him. He turned back around to look at Katy. She eyed him with knitted brows. He raised his own eyebrows, indicating that she should continue.

“Where are you going?”

“To find Lindsey,” said Alex without missing a beat.

“Oh.” Katy’s voice dropped into a slightly disappointed tone. ‘No, that’s just wishful thinking,’ Alex scolded himself.

“Yeah...”

An awkward silence filled the small bubble that the group had around them. Katy looked back down at her lap and wrung her fingers. Alex stared absently at the action for a moment… and then he noticed something.

“Where’s your ring?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Katy swore her heart almost stopped beating. Cassadee stopped fussing with Rian and turned around harshly on Rian’s lap, who made an ‘ow’ face and rubbed his crotch.

“Cass,” he groaned. “That fucking hurt…”

“Shut up, Rian,” she growled, staring at Katy. Well, staring at Katy’s hand, to be more specific. Katy blushed.

“I… Uh… I guess I just forgot to put it on today…”

Alex stared at Katy. He was pretty sure she was lying. He’d known the girl for four years, and been her best friend for the better part. He knew when she was lying… but he sucked it up, said ‘oh’ and walked away.

Katy felt the tears prickle behind her eyes. Alex hadn’t cared. When he found Lindsey he’d probably reward her for finally getting rid of the ring with a full-blown make-out session and a fumble in one of the janitor’s closets. A tear escaped her eyes, and a pathetic sob echoed from her chest. She vaguely felt Jack put his arm around her.

She didn’t know why Alex was acting like this. Sometimes it just happened – he distanced himself from her and acted like a complete asshole. It’d only happened since he started dating Lindsey. Katy couldn’t help but think that Alex liked Lindsey as a person a whole lot better than he liked Katy as a person… even though they were best friends. Well, she thought they were, until Alex started acting like this. His mood swings were giving her a migraine, and all she really wanted to do was go home and cut and then sleep…

“I want to go home,” she muttered into Jack’s neck, where she was now resting. He was rubbing his hand up and down her upper arm in a reassuring manner. Cassadee jumped up off of Rian and came round to the other side of the crying girl.

“I’ll take you home,” Cassadee mumbled. Katy stiffened. If Cassadee took her home, then Cassadee would probably skip and want to talk about the cutting.

“I can take myself home, Cassadee,” Katy mumbled, pulling away from Jack’s embrace. At this, Cassadee narrowed her eyebrows.

“I know you can, Katy. That’s what I’m worried about.” Cassadee stared directly at Katy. Katy frowned and closed her eyes, released a huge breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding.

“Fine,” she said through gritted teeth. Cassadee leaned between Jack and the other girl to whisper something to Jack, making it look like Cassadee was helping Katy up so Rian wouldn’t see her saying something to Jack.

“Come to Katy’s after school,” Cassadee said quietly. Katy stared at Cassadee, shocked. Cassadee just looked back.

“You won’t let me help you alone, Kate” was all she said before the two were hurriedly walking from the cafeteria… or Cassadee was dragging Katy, rather.

“Oh, ‘bye Cassadee; love you too?” Rian called after her sarcastically. She turned around and made an apologetic face before hushing Katy out the door. Rian shook his head and leaned forward on his hands, elbows on the table, and stared dejectedly and unfocused across the room.

“I’m still here, y’know, Ri,” Jack told him cheerily. Rian rolled his eyes and got up, making the chair screech on his way up, before storming across the cafeteria and out into the corridor. Jack pouted and then realised he was alone. He got up, embarrassed, and headed for his locker.

Why was everyone being fucking weird today? Cassadee was crying and frowning all of a sudden, Rian and Alex appeared to be on their periods, and Katy was being off with Cass… and Zack… well Jack didn’t know where Zack went.

‘Probably to find Melissa and make out, or smoke a spliff before the lessons, or maybe even both,’ Jack thought.

He sighed as he keyed in the combination to his locker. They were all only sixteen or seventeen. Why was everybody acting like they were fucking middle aged? Jack pulled the books for his next lessons out of his locker and slammed it shut, jumping when he saw Alex standing behind it, looking dejected.

“Holy fuck, Alex! Don’t creep up on people like that – it’s fucking creepy.”

“Whatever,” Alex mumbled, before sighing dramatically. Jack rolled his eyes and started to walk down the corridor.

“Jack,” Alex whined, drawling out the ‘A’ in the skunk-haired boy’s name.

“’Lex,” Jack mimicked the extending of the vowel in his best friend’s name.

“Jack, I want to get wasted,” Alex grumbled, leaning his head awkwardly on the taller male’s shoulder as they walked. Jack shoved him off and Alex pouted harder.

“Well you can’t. Not until two o’clock, anyway,” Jack told him. They were both walking aimlessly. Alex looked at his watch.

“Fuck. It’s only eleven forty five,” Alex grumbled. Jack rolled his eyes for what seemed like the millionth time since Alex had appeared five whole minutes ago, before starting towards their next period to loiter outside the door until class started.

Jack changed the subject before Alex could start up again.

“What was up with you at lunch, man? You didn’t even seem to care what had happened to Kate’s ring.”

Alex looked at his shoes. He did care about what happened to Katy’s ring. He didn’t want to make it awkward though – if she had decided she didn’t like it anymore, or didn’t want to wear it anymore because Alex had given it to her, then that was fine with him. Except it wasn’t, but there was nothing he could do about it.

“She said she forgot to put it on.” Alex shrugged. “What is there to care about it?”

“Alex, she always fucking wears that ring. She never takes it off. She was clearly lying! Does being on your period make you stupid?”

“I am not on my fucking period! I have a dick!” Alex growled. Jack smacked Alex upside his head.

“Get back to the important things, ‘Lex. Something’s happened to Katy’s ring. Don’t you care?!”

Alex glared at Jack. Of course he fucking cared! He couldn’t very tell Jack how much he cared though… could he?

“Yes, Jack, of course I fucking care, but she probably just doesn’t want to wear it anymore! She’s too polite to say so – you know Katy. Get off the fucking subject, okay?”

“What the fuck ever, Alex.” Jack didn’t tell him that Cassadee had taken Katy home. He would’ve, but the dude was being a complete fuck right now, and anyway, Jack didn’t think Cassadee wanted anybody else to know. Cassadee was his best friend – she probably asked him because he was close to Katy too. Sure, she could’ve maybe asked Alex, but Cassadee and Alex didn’t always see eye-to-eye… They were friends, of course, and they loved each other. Their personalities just clashed more often than not, and they ended up getting into silly fights. Jack figured this must be pretty serious for Cassadee not to go to Alex – she obviously didn’t want any fucking delays in getting it sorted… and truth be told, that kind of scared Jack. How was he supposed to deal with whatever crazy shit was going down? Katy didn’t look too pleased when Cassadee made her intentions to let Jack in on the ‘secret’ known. She looked like someone had sucker-punched her, actually. It unsettled Jack, the more he thought about it.

Alex started whining again, interrupting Jack’s trail of thought.

“Jack! I don’t want to be here.” He actually stomped his foot.

Jack stared at Alex, frustrated, before replying, “Well, where do you want to go then?!”

Cassadee gripped the wheel of Katy’s car rightly, staring at her best friend.

“Well?” She repeated. “Where. Do. You. Want. To. Go. Then?”

Katy stared at her hands. She was thinking of something to say when Cassadee opened her mouth… again.

“What actually happened to your ring?” Cassadee asked quietly, softly. “I know you didn’t just ‘forget’ to put it on. I know you better than that, Katy.”

Katy looked up at Cassadee. ‘Poker face,’ Katy told herself. ‘No body can find out about Lindsey - especially not Cassadee. Cassadee will tell everyone.’

“I lost it,” Katy said smoothly, not breaking eye contact. Technically, it wasn’t a lie. She did lose it – to Lindsey, down a toilet.

“How did you just lose it?” Cassadee asked, not quite believing it. “You adore that ring more than anything. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you without it, not once, since Alex gave it to you.”

Katy shrugged. She wasn’t in the mood to talk about her ring, or the person that gave it to her. Look how much he’d cared when she told him it was gone.

‘That’s not fair,’ Katy’s mind told her. ‘You didn’t exactly tell him it was fucking gone!’

Katy ignored this and stared out the windshield.

She had told Cassadee she didn’t want to go home because her mom would be home, and she didn’t really want to see her mother. She would ask questions as to why the two girls weren’t in school. Katy didn’t like to worry her… she had so many other things to worry about since Katy’s dad had left.

She sighed, and leaned her head against the headrest.

“Why did you tell Jack to come over later?” Katy enquired, turning her head slightly to look at the blonde-and-brown haired girl beside her. Cassadee blushed slightly.

“I thought maybe he could help me help you… I’m not entirely sure how to help you, Katy. I know you won’t make this easy.” Cassadee smirked ruefully before frowning at her lap. “You have no idea how much you mean to me, Kate. You’re my best friend in the entire world. I really don’t want to lose you.”

Katy placed her hand on the other girl’s shoulder. Cassadee completely broke down then.

“Cass… Cass, please,” Katy begged. She pulled the girl into an awkward embrace due to the lack of movement-space in the car.

Cassadee dried her eyes quickly after a couple of minutes and pulled back.

“Please can we go to your house? We’ll just tell your mom you didn’t feel well and I brought you home. She’ll probably be asleep anyway, Kate.”

Katy sighed. She knew she wouldn’t win this one. So it was hesitantly that she nodded, and Cassadee smiled reassuringly before starting up the engine again and headed towards Katy’s house.