A Second Chance

Mallory’s P.O.V.

My day was uneventful; I did some fieldwork, but not much. I wasn’t in the mood or spirit to do anything. I spent my whole day with Fonzie; I stayed with him in the barn, sitting on a bale of hay, talking to him like he could understand every word I said. “Fonz, I don’t know what I was thinking. I mean, Luke has been my best friend since I moved out here, the first friend after the accident.” Fonzie looked over at me confused, he tiled his head and let out a small ‘moo.’ I told him out loud my whole secret about being raped and attempting suicide. Maybe it was just me, but I felt like I needed to hear it again. Last night when I had told Chase about my secret, I had felt twenty million times better afterward. So I figured that I would feel that way if I told someone else too, even if they were a cow. Fonzie didn’t moo or interrupt me once while I was speaking. He had his head resting on my lap and it felt like he was really listening; and even though he was just a cow, that felt really good to have one more person know.

I kissed Fonzie on the head when it was nearing six, when I had to go to work. He mooed as if telling me to stay with him, and if I could have I would have. But I knew that I needed the money, so beside myself I shut the barn door and walked away toward the bar.

When I got to work, the bar was exploding with people; more people than I had ever seen in this small little one-horse town bar. I made my way over to the counter and checked in with Sam. I grabbed a pen and pad and began to go and take people’s orders, though it wasn’t long before I was hurrying along with Taylor to every table in the bar, trying to scribble down what people wanted. I could see Chase in the back growing frantic over all the meals that he had to cook. This one night was probably the busiest that I’ve been since working.

Eventually time caught up with the night and it grew late. A lot of people left, but we were still held with more people than we normally have. It was around this time that a certain person walked in, and sat down at the bar counter. When I first saw him, I looked straight over at Chase who was looking at me, a little unsure as to what to do. Luke just sat there at the bar, waiting to be served. I quickly ran over to Taylor.

“Taylor, you need to take Luke’s order.” She looked over at me like I was insane.

Why can’t you do it? I’m really kinda busy here.” I looked back over at Luke, who was still just sitting there.

“Uh, I don’t think that’s the best idea.” Not in the mood to argue, Taylor turned to look at me with a straight face.

“Mallory, this is part of your job. You need to do it, no matter what.” She walked off toward a table that was waving her over. I sighed to myself.

“Ok, just don’t blame me if a bar fight starts.” I said to myself once she walked away. Begrudgingly I walked over onto the opposite side of the counter where Luke was sitting. He didn’t look up at me when I walked over; he just kept staring at the table like he had been. I took a deep breath then spoke. “Uh, can I help you?” He looked up at me slowly, though he didn’t have an angry look in his eyes like I had expected.

“Mal, can we talk?” My face exploded with shock; I literally took a step back from where I was standing I was so shocked. He spoke calmly and sincerely. I then took the step again that I had retraced. “And when I say talk, I mean talk. Not just yelling and screaming.” His voice sounded sad. I didn’t speak for a moment; I simply just stared at him. I then shook my head to clear my head.

“Uh, yeah. Just uhm, hold on.” I ran over to the cash register where Sam was standing. “I need to take a five minute break.” I said quickly. He looked over at me and scowled. “Just five minutes, please.” Sam sighed heavily and looked away back over to the cash register.

“Five minutes. But the second that time is up I expect to see you back out there with Taylor.” I smiled brightly at him.

“Thank you!” I ran back over to where Luke was sitting with my smile still subconsciously on my face. “Let’s go outside.” He looked at me strangely; my smile then went away and I regained myself. “More private.” I told him. Without a word he got up and started heading outside; I quickly followed behind.

As soon as the door shut behind us, suddenly the eerie silence encased us and surrounded us. Outside was so much quieter than inside, and it was almost awkward for the few split seconds that we stood in silence. Luke’s head was hanging down and his hands were shoved into his pockets.

“I’m sorry.” Luke suddenly blurted out, without even so much as a glace up at me. I stared at him dumbfounded, unsure as to what I was to say.

“Luke, I—”

“No, let me talk.” He cut me off. He sighed then looked up at me, his hands still in his pockets. “I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting lately. I’ve been a total asshole to you; I’ve been yelling at you for things that shouldn’t even upset me. I’m just, I’m sorry.” His head went back down, and it was silent for a minute.

“Me too.” He looked up at me confused. “I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting. I, I haven’t been completely honest with you lately. And I hate myself for that. I mean, we used to be best friends, and now…”

“…we barely even talk.” Luke finished for me when I couldn’t speak anymore. It was silent for an awkward about of time. Neither one of us knew how to respond to what he said; there was nothing to really say. What he said was nothing but true. I suddenly spoke out in the dead silence.

“I don’t want it to be that way Luke. I want to be friends with you. I mean, you’re the first person who got close to me since—” I was about to say since the accident, but then I remembered that he didn’t know about that because I had refused to tell him. “—I moved here. So, whether you know it or not, you are an extremely special person to me.”

“You’re special to me too.” He said quietly; I didn’t know why but it made me smile.

“So why can’t we just go back to being friends? We can put all this crap behind us and just start off from where we left off.” I was smiling at him, though he wouldn’t exactly look at me. I wanted to know why he kept adverting his eyes away from me; it was almost like he couldn’t even stand to look at me. Finally he sighed and looked me straight in the eye.

“Mallory, I—” He stopped talking because suddenly the doors to the bar swung open and Chase appeared.

“Mal, not to interrupt your little Charlie Brown special you got going on here, but we really need you back inside.” At that second, Luke’s hands came out of his pockets and his head perked up, and he just got a lot more vocal.

“Dude, just give her a few minutes.” Luke said, staring down Chase. Chase gave him a nasty glare and spoke hard. My stomach began to tie itself in knots.

“Not my orders. Taylor’s.” Luke’s glare increased. He laughed sarcastically, though it sounded cold and covered in glass.

“You are such a freaking joke.” Chase came outside and let the doors to the bar close behind him.

“Yeah? At least I don’t yell at her over the stupidest shit ever imaginable.”

“At least I’m not just being nice to her to get into her pants, like you. Oh, wait I forgot. You already did.”

Shit.

Chase’s face grew confused and he stared at Luke like he was some new kind of species that was beyond ugly. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“She told me that last night you two had sex on the beach.” Luke said, glaring at him harder than I had ever seen anyone glare at anything. Chase’s face went from beyond confused to just speechless.

“We never slept together.” Chase said, suddenly talking calm. They then both turned and looked over at me. I didn’t want to look at either one of them at that moment; in fact at that moment I wanted to shoot myself in the brain. But Luke caught my gaze, and I couldn’t make myself look away.

“You lied?” His voice was still icy, but he was talking calmer. I felt lower than the worst criminal in the world.

“I, I was angry…” I said, not speaking louder than a mouse would.

“So you hurt me on purpose.” Luke said louder, and with more coldness than Christmas in Alaska. I felt like crying. I knew that I would regret implying that Chase and I had slept together, and now I was hating myself for it.

“Luke I—”

“You know what; I don’t even know what the hell I came down here for. Because it sure as hell wasn’t for you.” He turned his back and began walking away. I felt tears rolling down my cheek. I squatted to the ground and threw my arms over my head, as I felt tears strolling down my face. I hated myself, I hated myself, I hated myself.

“Mal,” Chase said after a few minutes. He was speaking quietly; he didn’t sound angry or upset. He sounded like he was trying to comfort me, when in all honesty I wanted to cry by myself. “You told him that we…” He didn’t finish his sentence. Through my sobs and sniffles I spoke.

“I was angry. I couldn’t stop myself.” I heard Chase kneel down beside me.

“So I guess that you’re not in the mood to work anymore.” I took my hands off my head and looked over at Chase and silently shook my head; tears still slightly spilling from my eyes.

“Just tell them I quit.” I looked away from Chase.

“What?” He said shocked.

“Just tell them I quit.” I said again and looked over at him again. “Because I’m moving back home.”