Take My Hand, Just Hold On

Brian and I wandered through his house mingling for the next hour, but my mind was still on Brenna as we made our way back outside to the porch. I glance over to the group she was with and spot her with just Vivian and Carla.

“Can you have another?” Brian asks, picking up a beer out of a cooler.

“Nah, I’ve had a couple already so I should probably quit,” I tell him.

“Ok,” he pauses and looks at me as if he’s waiting for me to say something. “God, Robert Eugene Pattinson, you’re just no good at sharing your feelings with me!”

I laugh, “You know my middle name is not Eugene – why do you insist on using it?”

He smiles, “It sounds better, and you know it. Anyways, seriously, are you going to ask her out tonight?”

“I think it’s probably best if I wait until after I’m all moved into my place. I don’t want to make it awkward or anything for the last few days I’m staying with her.”

“What if, instead of awkward, it made it an awesome few days? If you catch my drift? Eh? Eh?”

I shake my head slightly and laugh a little, “Un-bloody-likely, mate.”

“Oh fine. But if you haven’t done it in one week, I’m going to call her up myself and tell her. I still have her number from when you told me to hang out with her while you were shooting.”

“Oh yeah, you never did that, did you?” I ask, remembering when I had asked him for that favour.

“Of course not, I had my only problems going on,” he replies.

A moment later my eyes were covered and I hear “Guess who?”

I smile, “Brenna, how’s your night been?”

“Fantastic, Robert. And yours?” she asks, dropping her hands from my eyes and sidling up beside me.

“Pretty good. Why’d you leave your group?”

Her face forms a pout as she responds, “When you came and stole away Howard you said you’d come back and hang out with me, but you never did.”

“Sorry, love. You looked like you were having a good time without my bothering you,” I respond, putting an arm around her shoulder.

She surprises me by moving in closer and wrapping her arms around me, “It would have been better with my gorgeous hero-man near!” Her head was resting on my chest and I was worried she would be able to hear my rapidly rising heartbeat, so I was relieved when Brian started talking.

“Since when has Rob ever been a hero-man?” He questions.

Brenna took her arms from around me and lifts her head, “I don’t know, he pretty much saved me after the whole rape thing.” I drop my arm from around her shoulder and look at her, bewildered at what she just said.

Brian glances between Brenna and I before asking, “Er, what ‘rape thing’?”

She looks a little shocked before saying, “Oh! I thought Robert had told you… Sorry to spring that one on you! Anyway, I’ve, uh, got to use the washroom. I’ll be back in mo’!”

Brian looks at me and raises his arms as if to say “What the fuck, dude?” Which is what he did say following that gesture.

“Sorry, I didn’t think she wanted anyone else to know, and certainly didn’t think it was okay for me to tell anyone.”

“So that’s why you don’t think she’ll want to date you?”

“Pretty much. I mean, it’s taken her a long time to get to where she’s at now. I can’t imagine how hard it would be for her to be in an intimate sort of relationship, you know?”

“I can sort of get that, but also… Did you notice the way she was acting around you? I mean, I honestly think she likes you. And knowing she was raped – wait. Who the fuck raped her, and can we kick his ass?”

“He’s in jail. It was the guy she was seeing after I left… I wish we could do something to him. I’ve never felt a visceral hatred toward anyone before, but this is it. Any time I think about what he did I need to hit something.”

“I can see that,” Brian says, looking down at my tightly clenched fists. “Oh my god! I just remembered the last part she was at! That fucking dude trying to force himself on her? Holy shit, had I known I seriously would’ve knocked him out.”

I nod, “It’s something I wanted to do very badly.”

After a few minutes Brenna returns and leans her head on my arm, “How you doing, love?” I’ve obviously completely given up trying to not call her ‘love’ – it was a hopeless battle. Especially since I’ve officially admitted I still have feelings for her.

“Tired,” she says. “I think I drank too much.”

“Are you ready to go home?”

She lifts her head to look at me, “Would you mind?”

“Not at all – I’ve got to get up early to go furniture shopping.”

“Oh yeah! Am I still allowed to come with you?”

I smile, “Of course, if you’re feeling up to it. I’ve got to get going by 10:30 or so, though. There’s a lot of shit I need to buy.” I look to Brian, “Well, looks like we’re off. Thanks for having us, again. I’ll have to throw some sort of party once I’m all moved in.”

“Sounds good, mate. I’ll see you soon?” He replies.

I nod as I nudge Brenna to lift her head. “Shall we head out?” I ask her.

“Yeah, for sure! I should probably find Viv and Carla to say bye. Come with?”

“Sure,” I respond, as she takes my hand and begins to lead us away.

“Oh!” She exclaims and turns around, “I said it in my head but was about asleep on Robert’s arm back there – thanks for having us, Brian!” she lets go of my hand and gives him a brief hug.

“No problem, happy to have both or either of you here. Have a good night,” he responds as we walk away and Brenna takes my hand again.