Take My Hand, Just Hold On

Just after 5:00 that day, I walked out of the front doors to the building, thinking Robert would be waiting for me out front. I frown as I look up and down the street, failing to see Robert or his rental car. I give a slight sigh and take out my cell phone - no missed texts or calls from him, he should be here. After a moments indecision, I decide to give him a call.

"Hello, love. Where are you at?" Robert's voice comes on the phone after the first ring.

"Er, I'm outside the building now," I respond. "Where are you at?"

He lets out a low chuckle, "I'm out back in the parking lot." I look around, and sure enough there was a road heading to the back of the building with a parking sign.

Feeling slightly daft, I say, "Alright! I'll be right there," and hang up my cell.

I walk to the back of the building and see him at once - once again leaning against his car
smoking. I walk up to him and smile, "You know, I usually find smoking repulsive."

"Ouch. I'm sorry, it's the love of my life, dear."

I laugh, "Oh my... Well, I guess I only have to put up with it for another few weeks! Plus, on you, it's not quite as repulsive as I usually find it..."

"Well, I guess I'll have to take what I can get - 'not quite as repulsive as usual' - just the words I want to hear from a girl," Robert rolls his eyes while smirking at me. He takes one last puff and throws his cigarette. "Shall we go?"

He opens the passenger door for me and I get in.

"Are drinks needed?" he asks as he jumps in the driver's seat.

I laugh, "Naw, it wasn't actually bad at all. I mean, for the first couple weeks, Tom - that's the guy who I guess is training me or mentoring me or whatever, anyway - Tom said that I'd just be doing errands for him until I get used to where everything is. He says I'll pick up the general idea of the company quicker that way. And then I'll start sitting in meetings with him and his clients and everything. It sounds like it'll be quite fun once I get passed being his bitch for a few weeks!"

"Alright then, I'll take you out for a celebratory dinner!" Robert says, as he backs out of the parking space.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

For the next few weeks, Robert and I spent basically every weekend together, and would see each other once or twice during the week. Alas, it is now Friday and Robert is leaving on Sunday - a fact which we hadn't really spoken about, but was clearly on both our minds. I never imagined I would actually like him this much by the end. I had a preconceived notion he would be arrogant and completely self-involved, and that I would be bored of him by now. But, he ended up being such a laid-back kind of guy, hilarious in that almost-typical British way, usually quite modest, and just someone that I could have a good time with basically anywhere we went together (not that we went many places, as I really don't want my face plastered on magazines and shows like ET). However, having said that, I still don't want to bother trying any long-distance thing with him. So I have decided to not bring up the subject of his departure unless he does.

Currently, we are sitting on my couch watching bad movies (to mock) and eating pizza. Robert's arm finds its way around my shoulders and brings me closer to him. I lean in willingly and lay an arm lazily around his waist. I closed my eyes and took in his scent - a faint smell of tobacco and my lavender body wash. I laugh into his chest and hold him closer.

"What's so funny?" he whispers as he also holds me tighter.

It takes me a few seconds to stop laughing, "You using my body wash. It doesn't actually smell bad on you; it works."

He chuckles, "Thought I'd try it. You think it beats my usual man-smell?"

I laugh, "I dunno, there's certainly something appealing about a man smelling like.... Well, a man. But I could take it or leave it!"

It's silent for a while and we go back to watching the movie. Then, "Brenna?"

"Hmm?" I ask, unwilling to open my mouth - I'm lazy, what can I say?

"I know you didn't want to meet them last weekend, but it's my last weekend here now... And I have a bit of a going away party at my friend Brian's tomorrow night. And I was hoping you would come with. You know, meet all my friends..."

I sigh and sit up, Robert unwraps his arms from around me. I look into his eyes, "Please?" he adds.

"But it's like you said. This is your last weekend here, so why bother introducing your friends to a girl who you're only dating for the next 2 days?" I enquire.

"I know that we've only got another couple days. That's why I want you to come with me. The party would be no fun if you didn't come. It's only a couple of my close friends and their girlfriends. Plus, they all think I'm making you up because you keep refusing to meet them!"

I give a half-hearted laugh, "Robert, I just-"

He cuts me off, "-Please, Brenna? Think of it as a going away present for me? Plus, you might get on great with my friends and then you'll have some more people to hang out with when I'm gone..."

I turn my head to look at the TV, wondering why I'm being so stubborn about this. Why does it matter if I meet his friends? What if they don't like you? - a voice in the back of my head asks. I ask it why it would matter if they liked me or not; I'm only around for the next couple days. Maybe because you're hoping you'll be able to stay with him for longer? That's stupid - I'm the one that said no more than 3 weeks... That was before you really knew how great this would be. Ugh, stupid voice. Doesn't know anything.

"Yeah, I'll go," I say defiantly, trying to silence the voice in my head - turns out, stop asking it direct questions is probably a good way to go.

Robert smiles, "Cool. Thanks, Brenna." He gives me a short kiss and puts his arms back around me and pulls me in once again. After a couple minutes I hear him mutter, "Fuck, I'm going to miss this." It was unclear and took me a few seconds to realize what he'd said. I decide not to respond. Afraid of agreeing with him. Of admitting out loud how much I enjoyed spending time with him. Okay, maybe just stopping the questions isn't enought to silence that stupid voice.