Baby, Dont Stop Now.

It was four in the morning, and I couldn’t sleep. I grabbed a blanket and headed out onto Arianna’s balcony. I sat in the lawn chair and looked out onto the street. Her whole complex was made of blue bricks, it was rather ugly. But, the insides of the apartments were nice. I could hear the birds starting to sing their songs, and it comforted me.

I thought about John. I shouldn’t have, but I did. I pictured him up on stage singing his heart out, singing his songs. I thought about how, he’d pour his heart and soul into his music and how he felt. I gripped the blanket tighter and smiled. I remembered those songs he wrote for me. But my smile faded.

I was the reason why he wrote those words, and I was the reason why he sung those songs. I scrambled up and snuck quietly into Arianna’s room. I grabbed her CD Stand and slowly brought it out onto the balcony. I grabbed Cant Stop Wont Stop and looked at the back.

I raised an eyebrow, John had written me two songs. And they were both on this album. So he had to sing them at his concerts. I must be dreaming, and Everything I ask For. He just wrote them for me, never had to deal with me in them specifically. He told me both of the song meanings were meant for me.

He had no choice but to sing them. I shook my head, “You make me mad, John Cornelius.”

--

I found him at the local coffee shop and threw the CD on the table and he looked up. He raised an eyebrow, “Um, Hello?” I looked at the CD then back at him, he looked down. “Okay, my CD?”

I sat down, “You wrote two songs for me. They’re on your album.”

He nodded, “Yes, I know.”

I looked around the coffee shop, it was calm place to think. Books, tables, couches, chair, everything to be comfy. “Why? I mean when you sing them, don’t you think of me?”

John leaned back in the chair and played with his coffee cup, “Yeah. I do, but why are you concerned. I but them on the album, because I liked the meaning. ”

I stood up, “Right. Well thanks for clearing that up.” I grabbed the CD and started to walk out.

“Kaylie!”

I turned around and looked at him, “Yes?” I hated how I always admired his style. He was currently wearing a red and black plaid shirt, with the first three buttons undone, with black skinnies, and don’t forget the beanie that rested on his head; hiding his perfect messy hair.

He walked up to me, he grabbed my hand, “Can we try to make this work?”

I took my hand back, “No. Because your leaving for tour again in two days, and I’m moving soon. Nothing we do, or say will work. *We’ve got so much to prove, cause its our time to move on, so its time to let go*.”

John ran his hand across my face, “Kaylie. Honestly, I’m being serious. Don’t go.”

I shook my head, “John, I’m being serious. I need to get away from here. So many things remind of you. And if I go, theres a lesser chance that I wont hurt.”

He sighed, “But are you feeling hurt right now?”

I bit my lip and placed my eyes on a plant, the colors were gorgeous, purple, yellow and green. “No. But still, John. Arianna thinks its best I go too, and you know she needs me here. And-and my mom and my dad they never liked me with you.”

John placed his hands on my shoulder and pulled me a little closer, “Kaylie. Listen to your heart, please. I know you love me, and I’m really not sure if I’m in love with you. But I know pretty damn well….I-I..”

“You?”

He sighed again, “I’m saying, I like you a lot. I’m not sure if its love.”

“Your not sure if its love?”

He nodded, “I don’t. But your honestly the only girl that I’ve chased like this. I’m not chasing you to get in your bed, I’m chasing you to get to your heart.”

I looked down and breathed in, then out. “John, I don’t know. I mean, your words seem like the truth. But my mind is winning, maybe us pretending this never happened would be a good thing. I mean you pretended, why cant i?”

He put his hand up to his head, “You really want to leave?”

I nodded, “Yes, I really do.”

He looked down and then back at me. I could have sworn I saw tears, “Alright. I wont stop you.”

I half smiled, “So your done chasing.”

“I don’t want to be, but if you really want to go.”

I hugged him, “Theres other girls, John. We’re not compatible, find another girl. One that’s worth it, and don’t mess it up. Don’t do the wrong thing to the good girl, promise?”

He looked at me with his head sideways, “How can I promise you, if I already made the mistake.”

I pressed my lips and kissed his cheek, “Bye, John.”