Farewell to Shady Glade

Everything was silent. Was my mind shutting itself down from everything? It was imploding on itself and I couldn't take it anymore. "What?" Jaxin was the first to speak after I uttered my words. Shayley was just staring at me, his mouth open in shock. "Do you know?" Jaxin asked in a whisper. I nodded. I didn't look at anyone but Shayley. As soon as I nodded my head, his eyes turned from shock to pure hatred and anger.
"Who?" Shayley asked; his voice stone cold. I just shook my head, tears flying from my face. He grabbed my arms, harder then he intended, but I shrank away from the feeling. My eyes were closed, unable to see who looked at him, who touched him, because he let go of me.
"Don't even dude." I heard Jerry say from the front of the van. I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them. My body shook with my silent sobs.
"Who?" Tino asked me, setting a hand on my shoulder. I cringed a tiny bit, but he left his hand there. I shook my head again. "Please, Chris, please. We have to know." He pleaded for me. My mind flashed back to Austin holding me against the wall, me pleading for my sanity. I inhaled as much as I could, letting it feel my lungs.
"Austin." I breathed and opened my eyes to see Shayley's staring back at me with loathing and rage. His face contorted in anger, something I never thought I would see on such an innocent face. "Shay." I said, but I don't think he even acknowledged the notion. He got out of the van, the door still being open from when he brought me here, and started to walk away. "Shayley!" I screamed after him, making the move to leave the van, but as soon as I got up from my crouch, my body protested and I fell back.
"No, don't, we'll get him." Phil said from behind me. I sat there as Phil and Tino jumped out of the van to follow Shayley. I started crying again, harder then before.
"Come on, love, we'll find you a shower." Jaxin said from the passenger seat, smiling at me and getting out of the van to help me.

It had been hours since Shayley, Phil, and Tino left. Bus call was soon, and Jaxin was freaking out. "Where are they?!" he practically screamed. I was in the very back of the van, curled into a ball, happy to just be clean of the filth of Austin. As much as I could've been anyway.
"Bro, calm down. They'll be here." Jerry told him for the thousandth time. My phone buzzed in my hand, and I opened it to see a text message from Shayley.
"Come find me. Please. I'm not far from the van, bring Jax." It read and I just stared at it for a second.
"Jaxin, we have to go find Shayley." I said out loud and Jaxin stopped his mid-sentence whine. I grabbed the hoodie at my feet and pulled it over me, being fully clothed. He stared at me from the rearview mirror. It was the first thing I had said since they left.
"What about Tino and Phil?" he said out loud, still looking at me. I shrugged, and got up. My body screamed with the muscle activity in my lower body. I yelped, unable to become accustomed to just how sore I was. Jaxin looked like he had tears in his eyes from watching me struggle to get out of the van when I looked back at him. He said nothing as he got out and helped me again, and said nothing to his question.
"We'll be back." He told Jerry and Jerry just nodded, staring out the windshield. "Text me if Phil and Tino come back." He said and held me up as I tried to walk straight.

Jaxin sighed to himself as we walked down the street, our arms interlaced in case I couldn't walk. "I am so sorry." He whispered to me. I just looked at him. "None of us should've left you." He said. I still stared at him as he looked ahead of us in the darkness. "Why could any of us have been so stupid?!" he yelled, pulling at my arm. I stumbled and he cursed himself and held me steady.
"Jaxin." I said to him, trying to comfort him. It was in my nature, Jaxin couldn't be hurting because of what had happened. "It's not your fault." I said and we passed a streetlight. His face glistened with fresh tears.
"You're like my sister, this shouldn't have fucking happened." He said, his voice holding all pain for the tears on his face. I stopped, and he did immediately with me. He faced me, and I could see his face in the moonlight. I hugged him with all the strength I had, and he let out a laughing whimper.
"Jaxin, please." I said to him, not letting him go. He hugged me back, holding me. "I love you, don't hurt." I said, feeling like a child. He laughed again and we broke apart to walk the streets and find my love.

Phil and Tino were unsuccessful in finding Shayley, as Jerry texted Jaxin to tell him they had come back. I was worried now, everything that had happened earlier in the night gone from my mind in that infinitesimal second. Nothing was about me now, everything was about finding Shayley. Jaxin craned his head along the alleyways, and I wondered if he could even see anything in the darkness. We walked hand in hand along the street, like brother and sister, afraid for someone we both loved.

It took us what seemed like hours, but in reality were only minutes. Jaxin had seen him before I had, stumbling out of the alley closest to us. I let go of Jaxin and ran to him. The soreness in my body was very well known as I did so, but I didn't care. All I needed was to know that he was okay. Shayley looked up to see me coming towards him and he smiled. I collided with him, almost knocking the two of us over, and just hugged him. My simple happiness to see that he was okay was all I needed. I finally stepped back and looked at him. His face was bleeding, his lip puffy and busted, and a cut under his right eye. "Shayley, what happened to you?!" I just about screamed and he shook his head.
"I found Austin." He said and I just stared at him. I took his hands in my own, dragging him to the nearest streetlight, seeing his injuries in fully effect. His eye was already bruising, and the blood was more pronounced. I looked away from his face to his knuckles, seeing them all bloodied and bruised.
"What did you do Shay?" I asked, still staring at his knuckles. I looked back up to his blue eyes, seeing shame.
"He's alive." He whispered to me and I cringed. My eyes burned with the feeling of crying, but I didn't let them fall. Jaxin came close to us, setting his hand on my shoulder.
"Come on guys, we have to go." Was all he said as I let go of Shayley's hands and went with Jaxin.

I didn't say anything to Shayley, didn't let him comfort me as I cried the way towards the next city. The tour would be over in days, and I didn't know how to deal with it all. I didn't have a viewpoint on what Shayley did to Austin. What could I do? He apologized to me once we got to the venue, pleading for forgiveness. I said nothing, just went to him backstage, afraid of letting go. He held me close as we shared our own moment of vulnerability. All I knew now was that my life would never be the same, things would never go back to "normal."