Flight Risk

I answered the phone with a shaking hand. Zacky's fingers tangled around my free ones to comfort me, but I couldn't get myself to speak first. My mother's voice sounded through the phone within seconds.

"Everly, where are you?!" she asked frantically, "There's an officer here and he's told me that you are spending time with that man again, what is going on?"

I pulled my knees up to my chest and leaned into Zacky's side as tears welled in my eyes. "Mom, relax," I said, trailing off as I lost the words I wanted to say. "Everything is okay," I finally spoke, knowing that those words would only worry her more.

She instantly started yelling into the phone and in the background I could hear the officer trying to calm her down, encouraging her not to scare me off like I was some injured animal.

"Mom, stop," I pleaded, composing myself as Zacky pulled me tightly against him, "I'm telling you right now that who ever is there is making this into a much bigger deal than it really is."

"Well, what is it?" she asked automatically.

Zacky and I were silent as we sat on his bed. In the living room our friends were just as quiet as the tension grew. On the other end of the phone there wasn't a sound as my mom and the police officer waited for either a confession or a denial. In this moment, it felt like the weight of the world was resting on my shoulders.

Zacky pressed his fingers into my side, his arms wrapped around my waist. I swallowed hard and dropped my head against his shoulder. His eyes met mine and kissed me softly. When he lifted his mouth away from mine, I clenched my jaw and answered my mother.

"It's nothing," I said, blinking away the tears, "I hung out with them again but I know what the police have been telling you and I don't know how you could ever think that I would let any of them sleep with me." I bit my lip to the point of pain and pressed my body harder against Zack's, hating the words that were leaving my mouth. "That's disgusting, Mom," I spoke, "They're just friends."

In the background I could quietly hear the officer coaxing my mom and feeding her words. "What about Zachary Baker?" she questioned, repeating the name the officer spoke. Her voice was shaking and nervous as she spoke the words she was hoping weren't true, "The police believe that he... They're saying that he had sex with you."

It was in the moment that I knew everything was going to change. There would be no pretending, no continuing to keep ourselves a secret from my family. It was over, and as the tears dropped onto my cheeks and Zacky's lips met mine, we both seemed to realize that it would be the last time for a long time.

As the police listened in to our conversation, I vehemently denied the accusations that were being shot at us, going as far to downgrade Zacky, no matter how much it hurt him to hear my words. With one conversation I led my mother away from the accusations and brought her back to my side, but despite his fingers against my skin, I knew that our relationship was going to be our only casualty.

The lies flowing from my mouth hurt us both more than either of us could ever imagine. I spewed out in denial that I ever cared about the man, telling my mom - and who ever else was listening - about how I would never ever consider becoming romantically involved with any of my 'older' friends, let alone Zachary Baker.

Of course, when I ended the phone call with a promise to come right home, I still loved Zacky more than I'd ever loved anyone before, but the poorly concealed look in his eyes told me that I'd hurt him and that hurt me.

I pocketed my cell phone and wrapped my arms around his neck, silently reveling in the feeling of him pulling me closer to him. "I love you," I spoke clearly, nestling my face into the crook of his neck, "I'm so sorry."

I felt him shake his head against me. "Don't be," he whispered against my skin, "You said what you had to."

I reached up and angrily wiped the tears from my eyes. Zacky pushed my shoulders back when he realized that I was crying again. "Grange, what's wrong?" he questioned, rubbing his thumb over the tear on my cheek, wiping the moisture into my skin. "I'm okay, don't be upset because of what you said."

"It's not that," I whispered, meeting his confused emerald eyes.

"Then what is it?" he asked, tightening his grip on my shoulders just slightly, "What's wrong, why're you crying? Everything is going to be okay, we'll get through this."

I grabbed each of his wrists while I shook my head and stepped back from him. "We won't," I countered, crying harder now.

Zacky grew almost frantic then, grabbing my hands in his. "Why not?" he asked softly, looking into my eyes for the answers that couldn't be found there.

I spoke as I pulled my hands out of his. The look on his face told me that the words weren't needed to explain, but I spoke them anyways, crying harder than before as he tried to stop them and change my mind. "We can't be together anymore," I cried, stepping away from him as he rebutted, reaching for me. "No, Zacky, we can't," I sobbed, stepping around him, "It's not safe. I can say goodbye now or I can lose you forever."

"Granger, you don't have to lose me at all!" he denied, grabbing my wrist, "We're okay, I promise. We'll make this work, I swear to you!"

Breathing didn't come easy as I backed towards his bedroom door. Zacky followed me quickly, trying to grab me before I could make into the view of our friends - his friends. "Ev, stop," he pleaded as I reached for the door, "Think about what you're doing, baby, please."

"I have," I whispered, meeting his eyes one last time, "And I have to let you go before I get you hurt."

"You can't just 'let me go'!" he shouted, "We're in this together. You can't just make the decision all by yourself, Grange! It doesn't work like that. I love you, for Christ's Sake. You can't just make the decision for both of us!"

His words had me sobbing as I pulled the door open and stood halfway in and out of it. "That's the thing about relationships." I nodded as I spoke, "I can."

With those two simple words I was racing through his living room, past his friends, with my backpack thrown over my shoulder as he watched me go, stunned quiet by my quick retreat and our painful ending. I cried as I ran, desperate not to stop and turn around for the sake of his life and his future.

I flew through the door of my house, too upset to even compose myself. I barely noticed my mom sitting in the living alone, even as she called out to me I ignored her completely. My entire world felt like it was shattering and it was all my fault. I climbed under my covers fully dressed buried myself in the thick comforter.

Locked on the other side of the door my mom called to me, begging for me to explain what happened but I hardly heard her voice as I listened, through the sound of my own sobbing, to the soft vibrating of my cell phone. An image of us flashed on the screen and I stared at it, wishing only that we could go back to before we ever met.

I knew if we could, Zacky's future would be safe and my heart would be intact. In that moment I would give the world to forget him. Because forgetting him seemed to be the only way to save him.