Flight Risk

Johnny was blatantly surprised to see me when he came walking into the lunch room. He grinned and hurried over with curious and pained eyes. "Granger, you're back," he said, carelessly dropping into the chair across from me, "Are you okay? Zack is going insane. He can't get ahold of you. He won't explain anything that happened with you guys, but he keeps saying that you guys are actually over."

My eyes dropped to the grainy, multi-colored linoleum table top. "Johnny, I don't really want to get into all of that right now," I murmured, "but I need you to tell him something."

He frowned. "Granger, you and Zacky are just pretending not to be together, right?" he questioned, completely ignoring my question, "There's no way that Zacky could even function without you."

"Johnny," I practically snapped, drawing his attention back to what I wanted, "Give me your phone. I need to talk to him."

"Is that such a good idea?" he questioned. He nervously glanced at the group of teachers who sauntered through the door exchanging laughs. "I mean, don't you think people will be watching you?"

"Why do you think I'm not using my own phone?" I asked, taking the little machine from the bassist's fingers. I scrolled through the frustratingly long list of people Johnny knew and clicked on Zack's name and picture. "Should I text or call?" I questioned as I lingered with my finger over the TALK button. "Do you think it'll hurt him to hear from me?"

"You're saving his ass," Johnny replied sincerely, "You have to talk to him."

"What if they're watching his phone calls?" The idea appeared suddenly in my mind and scared me beyond belief. I moved my finger away from the button and put the phone to sleep. "Here, take it." I slid it across the table to him.

"You'll have to find another way," Johnny persisted, roughly running his palm over his short hair, "But honestly, if they believe you two are just friends, why wouldn't they understand that you could be hanging out during all of this?"

"I'm not allowed out of the house," I answered, thankful for the first time for that new rule harshly imposed upon me, "and Gabriel is coming home tonight to 'look after me'. I thought by going to school my mom would let that go, but no luck."

Johnny cringed at the thought of my older brother. "Sorry, Grange," he muttered, then he changed the subject, "Write everything down," he suggested, "I'll get it to him."

I nodded, deciding that it was the best way to go, and grabbed a notebook from my backpack. With a pen I scrawled Zacky's name at the top before explaining everything I could with written words. I changed our plan, hoping this would make it to Zack before the cops. Otherwise, I said nothing else. I didn't console him about our breakup or even mention it. We were just trying to get out of a jam, then we would go our separate ways.

I signed the letter simply with the first letter of my name, folded it up, and slid it across the table to Johnny. "Get it to him soon," I suggested, watching as he stuck it in the front pocket of his jeans, "I don't know when they're going back to question him."

"I can't wait until this is over. I can't stand having the cops snooping around all the time, it's not good for the band or for Zack."

I glanced away from his eyes. "I know, I'm sorry."

Johnny shook his head. "It's not your fault, Granger," he consoled, "How can you help who you fall in love with? It just so happens that you're just a few months too young."

"I'm stupid is what I am," I confessed, covering my face with my hands, "I should've known it wasn't going to work out. He has a life to live, he shouldn't have been anchored to the ground in the first place."

Johnny scoffed, surprising me. When I looked up and met his eyes, he spoke. "Zacky isn't anchored when he's with you, Granger, if anything he's lighter. And he's definitely happier. I can barely stand to see him in the state he's in now. It's like he's barely surviving without you. He's never been like this about a girl before, and trust me, he's been pretty beat up about some relationships."

My imagination brought a picture of Gena and him together before I ever existed in his life and the idea that came with it hurt more than I'd been feeling since Zack and I ended, more than I'd allowed myself to feel.

"Johnny, can I have that back?" I asked, holding my hand out for the letter, "There's something I want to add."

He cautiously fetched it from his jeans. "What?" he asked as he handed it back to me.

"Just something that Zack needs to do," I said as I unfolded it and grabbed my pen again, "It'll make him seem less suspicious and probably end all of this a lot quicker."

I rested my elbows on the table to write. Zack- I started at the bottom of the page, I know it's not easy right now and neither of us believe that it will be anytime soon, but to save yourself, you need to move on.

I continued from there for another paragraph, explaining how dating would make him look less guilty and make the police realize that he and I were nothing, that we didn't even exist. When I was finished, I folded it again, following the creases, and gave it Johnny, who frowned and opened it.

Without asking, he read the last section he watched me write, and his expression told me how he felt about it. We he pressed the page down into the table, I could see his defiance.

"Johnny, just give it to him," I demanded softly before he could argue with me about what I was asking Zack to do, "He has to get on with his life and the sooner he does, the easier things will be for him."

Johnny looked at me through bared eyes. "Do you really think he can just get over you at will? Zack can barely get out of bed when he wants to and hell will freeze over before he ever leaves the house. You ended things so suddenly that it shocked him into practically into become a recluse."

"Johnny, I don't-"

"Granger, you have to hear this," he stopped me, "You and him are the same. All those days you couldn't get out of bed or leave the house, Zacky was in his bed, trying to figure out how to make you change your mind, make you see that he would give up everything just to be with you."

"I don't want him to lose everything!" I fought, wishing Zack wouldn't be so selfless, "I couldn't live with myself if he lost his life to jail because of me. How would I ever look at myself or get out of bed if I knew Zack was locked in a cell?"

Johnny sighed and shook his head. "He can't get on without you, so you asking him to find someone else isn't going to work."

"He has to try," I defended, crossing my arms and resting them on the table, "He has to find someone and pretend that he's happy, because if he doesn't they're going to see right through us."

"I'd be shocked if Zacky could imitate anything close to how he was with you."

"He has to."

I wasn't hungry, so when Johnny tucked the letter back into his jeans, promising to give it to Zack, I gathered my things early and headed across the school to my next class, wanting nothing more than to be away from people's prying eyes.

While the police had kept our case out of the papers and news, it had traveled through our school like all rumors and gossip. Naomi undoubtedly paved the way for the story to reach each group of friends in the building.

And as I walked into my teacher's empty class room, I was worried that the gossip had reached more than just the students. Mrs. Ritter looked stunned to see me since I hadn't been at school in more than a week. "Everly, I'm glad to see that you're okay," she spoke as she looked up from her papers.

I decided to walk home after school instead of taking the bus. It would take longer, but it would guarantee less time with my brother, who undoubtedly would have a million questions about the investigation.

By the time I was crossing through the front yard, it was dark out. The house lights were on all the way down the street on both sides and the street lights were flickering on and off like they were indecisive about when to shine fully.

I pushed through the front door. My mom and my brother were sitting on the couch and they both stood up when I stopped there. "Ev, where have you been?" my mom asked as she walked around the couch to me, "We've been worried sick."

"I walked home," I said as I continued on to my room, "That's it."

Gabe followed me without a word, but I could see what he wanted to say on his face. My mom hung back and allowed him to take charge like she always did. "Granger, you could've called," he stated as he reached out and stopped the door before I could close it on him, "I would've come and got you."

"That's why I didn't call," I muttered, dropping my backpack on the floor by the window seat, "I needed some time to myself. Nobody ever leaves me alone anymore."

"I wonder why," he said, closing my bedroom door behind him. He kicked a pair of my shoes towards nightstand and sat on the edge of my bed with his body turned around to look at me. "You can't walk around here like it's everyone else's fault that you're not allowed to see your friends."

I sneered at his tone of voice and crossed my arms. It wasn't their fault, but it wasn't mine either. How was I supposed to know that Zacky would get under my skin. When I met him, I didn't know that he would be the one who would mean so much to me. I'd never planned to fall for anyone. Boyfriends weren't something I'd even thought about and that's why Zack was so special.

He'd come when I was least expecting him to. Our meeting was serendipitous and doomed from the beginning. I stood up and pushed my brother's shoulder. "Get out, Gabe. I'm not talking to you because you don't know anything."

He let me push him out the door. "I know enough, Everly."

I stood in the doorway with my arms crossed over my chest. He stood across the hall in the doorway of his. "Stay out of it, Gabriel, I don't need you making my life anymore complicated."

He sighed. "I'm just trying to protect you, Ev. You're my little sister. I know that you don't think you need to be saved, but you don't even realize that he's got you wrapped around his finger."

I turned away from his pitying eyes and pulled my door so it was only me standing between it and the frame. "Just stay out of it, Gabe." I stepped back and closed the door, knowing that getting my brother involved would only lead to more trouble for everyone.