Sentenced by My Blue-Eyed Lover

My mom came running into the room followed closely by Luc.

“Oh my goodness! Nick help her to the car,” my mother instructed to my useless dad. “Luc, honey, call Doctor Collins and tell him we’re on our way. Also, grab Alana’s bag with the baby’s things.” As my mom and dad helped me down the stairs I couldn’t help being frightened.

“Mom I’m a month early, is the baby okay?” I asked as we got in the car and my dad backed out of the driveway.

“You’re just premature honey, it happens to many people. Just relax and do your breathing,” she said. Luc was holding my hand in the back seat and looked like a lost puppy.

“What do I do? What do I do?” he asked looking at me as I had yet another contraction.

“Just relax,” I said cracking a smile. “Do your breathing.” He did it at once and I laughed at the sight of him. “You look like you’re the one having the baby not me.” He waved his hand at me in dismissal and continued with the breathing technique. Once at the hospital, my dad got a wheel chair and when I was sitting in it he rolled me inside.

“My daughter is in labor,” my dad said to a passing nurse. The woman stopped and looked at me.

“How far inbetween are the contractions?” she asked leading my father into a delivery room.

“About five minutes,” he answered. I bit my lip so I wouldn’t scream as the next wave of pain hit me.

“Could you fucking hurry up this fucking hurts?” I screamed giving the nurse what I’m sure was a pissed look.

“Help her into this dress,” the nurse said handing me a hospital gown. “Then settle her in because it’s still going to be a while. There is also some paperwork that I have to have you fill out.” She was about to leave when she saw that my mom and Luc were also in the room. “I’m sorry but there can only be one person here.”

“We understand,” my mom said quickly. I was about to complain when my daughter started acting up again. “Nick you go fill the paperwork and stay with Luc. I’ll be with Alana.” My father nodded as he leaned down and gave me a peck on the cheek.

“I love Alana,” he said.

“I love you too.”

“Good luck,” Luc said. As they exited the tiny room with one bed, my mom helped me up and we managed to get the dress over me. I then settled into the bed that would be my prison for a time. My lower back felt like an elephant had decided to jump on it continuously and my stomach felt taunt. My heart was pounding and I was petrified.

“Mom, I don’t know if I can do this,” I said as the contraction stopped and I cold finally draw enough breath to talk. My palms were sweating and my forehead glistened with perspiration.

“You’re going to be fine darling. It’s normal to be frightened,” she soothed, wiping my forehead with a wet towel that she had gotten from the table next to her.

“I want Billy,” I admitted putting my hands over my belly. A damn tear escaped as I said the reason I was truly frightened. “I don’t know if I can do it without Billy. Damn it! I need him!” I dropped my head in my hands. I still loved him after everything. I could never hate him no matter what he did to me. He was etched into my heart forever.

“Honey,” my mom started.

“I know what you’re going to say, ‘He’s gone and I need to move on’ but I don’t want to,” I cried in despair. “I need him and he’ll never come.”

“Oh honey,” my mom cried gathering me to her. I let go of all my emotions and sobbed like a three year old. I let the pain go, watched as all of it was washed away. I let go of all my worry and let it shed from my body. I even tried to let go of my love for Billy but that remained fastened to my heart no matter what I did. My mom stayed with me the whole time, my anchor at the lowest point of my life. I finally sat away from her and dried my tears, I had to be strong for my baby. Billy wasn’t coming and never would.

“Sorry for my babbling mom,“ I said. I have to be strong, I repeated to myself. “I was just feeling sorry for myself. I’m alright now, forget what I said.” My mom nodded and smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes. I let my face take on a determined look and sat as straight as I could in my current condition as the door opened.

“Ah, it’s finally time!” said Doctor Collins cheerfully. “I’m so happy for you Ms. Darley!”

“It’s Hume,” I corrected. My heart gave a tug of misery but I knew that Billy wouldn’t like me using his last name. It had been he that said I would have it only for a few months.

“Oh…” Collins replied with a little frown. It was then that he spotted my mother. “I see…well why don’t we see how far along you are my dear.” He put some gloves on and instructed me to but my feet up in the straps. “Well, it looks like you have some time to go it’s only about two centimeters at the moment.”

“How much longer?” I asked putting my feet down.

“It all depends my dear. Could be an hour or it could be ten, it’s all up to God,” he said rolling his chair over to me. “All you can do is get comfortable. If you want I can run you through what should happen, it might make you feel better.”

“Yes please,” I said, I needed to know what I should expect. I had to be strong.

“I’m going to go check on your father and Luc,” my mom said. “I’ll be right back.” I nodded and turned to listen to Doctor Collins.

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Nick Hume POV

“You’re all set Mr. Hume,” said the nurse cheerfully taking the information I had just filled out. “You and your son can take a seat in the waiting room behind you, it might be some time.”

“Thank you,” I answered putting a hand on Luc’s shoulder and steering him to where the nurse had pointed out.

“Do you think she’s okay?” Luc asked worried.

“She’s fine,” I said in the most convincing tone I could. Truth was that I was concerned for my daughter. Since she had meet that murderer, Billy, she had not been the same.

“Nick,” came Helen’s voice as she walked down the hall.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” I asked panicked by the sight of her here and not with Alana.

“It’s nothing,” she said giving Luc and I both a reassuring smile. “Luc could you give your father and I a minute?”

“She’s fine, right? And the baby?” he asked to make sure.

“They’re both fine,” Helen reassured with a smile. He nodded and then walked into the waiting room. He pulled out his drawing book and got to work.

“What is it Helen?” I asked.

“It’s Alana---.”

“You said she was fine!”
“Physically yes but mentally no,” Helen explained looking me straight in the eye. “She needs Billy.”

“No! Absolutely not! I don’t want that murderer near her!” I exclaimed fuming. As much was I had tolerated that man during the days he was sick, I still felt some hate for him. I just didn’t want him near my baby girl.

“Well whatever you feel for him has to be put aside for Alana,” she hissed. “She still loves and needs him.”

“Well he doesn’t love her,” I lied. I knew that true reason why he had broken her heart a month ago but I couldn’t make myself let go of my animosity for the man that had ordered the killing of my son.

“Who? That man that is the father of Ms. Hume’s baby. He’s crazy about her,” came a voice from behind us.

“Doctor Collins?” Helen said turning around.

“I’m so sorry to have butt into your conversation. I was coming to tell you that I was done,” he said with a sheepish grin.

“What did you mean by that?” I asked .

“What? Oh…did you know that that young man threw me against the wall the first time I met him?” he chuckled but broke off when he saw our faces. “No, no you miss understand me. He was very protective of her. There’s not that many men that love their women that much. I say that if you hit the doctor that was touching your woman then there’s real love there.” Helen raised her eyebrow. What a strange little man, I thought. “If you don’t believe that then just watch the way they look at each other. They have something special there, like fire. I always feel like if I get between their gaze I’m going to be burned!” Doctor Collins laughed. “You’ve never seen it? My, you must be blind.” I had seen it and by my wife’s look so had she. I remember clearly the first time I had seen that bond between them. Alana had burst into the church when Billy had his gun aimed at me, it was strange to think that he hadn’t shot me while he had the chance. I had thought that it had been stupidity on his part but now I thought maybe that he didn’t want to. But at the time that had been insignificant. As soon as my daughter and Billy had looked at each other it was as if lightning had flashed and a huge boom had sounded around them. “…it’s such a pity he isn’t here, they were one of the most interesting and lovely couple I have ever meet. Hugely entertaining to watch,” Collins rattled on.

“Thank you,” Helen said.

“Oh, well I’ll just check on you later,” Doctor Collins said with a lopsided smile before skipping away. I paid no attention to what Helen was saying. I had been thinking that I was helping my daughter but instead I had been hurting her. This Billy was her life now and I had tried to keep her with me. I had not wanted to let go of my first born. I’m a selfish idiot! I thought. I rushed into the waiting room and grabbed my coat which was laying next to Luc.

“Where are you going ?” Helen said following me.

“I’m going to right a wrong and bring Alana what she needs,” I said. “Go back to her, I’ll be back in an hour.”

“Hurry,” Helen yelled as I ran out of the hospital. I jumped into my silver Toyota and pressed the gas. As I raced to the only place that I thought the love of my daughter’s life would be, I hoped that I wouldn’t be too late. I blew every red light and stop sign I came across but since it was so late there weren’t man cars around. I finally found the sign that I was looking for. I parked my car in a no parking zone and jumped out, scanning the lot. My eyes locked onto a black mustang with tribal symbols. Now that I knew he was here I locked my car doors and entered the bar named Four Roses. A cloud of smoke met me along with loud laughter. It was late Friday night so there were a lot of people at the bar. There was dancing in a corner and occupied tables everywhere. As I made my way to the bar I saw many rough looking people glancing my way.

“Who’s the fucker in the suit?” a big boned man asked his companions. I didn’t make eye contact instead looking for a shaved head. When I couldn’t see anything I went to the bar.

“Excuse me,” I said to the women behind the bar, who was bent over and searching at the bottom. “Where’s Billy Darley?” The woman looked up at me with wide eyes. “Allison?”

“Mr. Hume?” she said. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here for Billy,” I said,

“He’s not here,” she said her eyes hardening.

“I saw his car outside,” I said wondering why she was lying to me before it clicked. “I’m not here to hurt him. Alana is in labor.”

“Holy crap!” she said dropping all the bottles she had been carrying.

“Ally what the fuck?” cried the man that appeared to own the bar. “Clean this mess up.”

“Later,” Allison replied waving her hand at him without even looking his way. She came around the bar and walked to the corner of the room. “Billy’s in the back with the guys.” She led me into a dark hallway and past a phone booth before opening a closed door. I entered a big room with a pool table, couches, and a darts game on a graffitied wall. My gaze took in all the men lounging around before going to the man that had tattoos poking out of his shirt and snaking around his neck. He was facing always from me, feet popped up on the table as smoke drifted above him. All the guys except Billy froze and pulled out their guns when they saw me approach.

“Fuck,” swore a Latino.

“Not again,” said a man with a Mohawk. I put my hands up to show then that I was unarmed. Billy’s men relaxed a bit and put their weapons away but close by incase things turned south. Throughout the whole exchange Billy Darley hadn’t even turned around.

“What do you want Hume?” his deep voice said before he put his feet down and stood. He flicked the cigarette away from him and look over at me. I almost gasped out loud but managed not to. The man that had been the reason for my grief for months looked like he had gone to hell and back. This man that had haunted my nightmares looked to have aged considerably in just one month. He was still wearing those dark clothes he felt so at home in: dark torn jeans, black cotton shirt with the sleeve pushed back to show off his tattooed arms, biker boots, and sliver cross. His famous brown trench coat was swung over his chair and his gun was lying on the table he had been sitting at. I could see fresh cuts on those exposed arms and a new wound on the back of his neck. The gang leader’s face had an unhealthy color to it almost pale but not quiet there. His lips were turned down in scorn and looked like they hadn’t smiled in years. But it was is eyes that made me want to run the opposite direction. There were sunken bags under them, a testament of what little sleep he had gotten. His eyes themself were an icy blue that help tell tale of suffering, lose, and pain. They looked haunted by the things that he had experienced in life and the hardness that came along with living the way he did. His presence still commanded attention but it had a glimmer of madness to it. The man before me looked harder and more dangerous then ever before. He looked like a man that had nothing left in life to lose. “I asked a fucking question Hume.”

“You need to come with me. Alana’s in labor,” I said. I watched him carefully and saw a spark of life in his eyes at the mention of my daughter.

“Holy Christ,” said one of Billy’s men.

“She okay?” asked a dark skinned man.

“She’s fine but she needs Billy,” I said.

“Her due date isn’t till next month,” Billy said folding his arms.

“Well the baby had other plans so come on,” I said sweeping my hands for him to go first.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Billy responded. The guys all looked down are their feet at their leader’s answer. They were disgusted at his behavior but I noticed something they didn’t. His answer had held a note of sadness in it, I knew that he desperately wanted to be there. “You’re wasting your time Hume. Go back to her.” Billy turned to go back to his life of drinking and smoking, walking away from the thing he wanted most in life.

“She asked for you.” Billy froze and clenched and unclenched his fist.

“So what? I don’t love her,” he said not facing me.

“I know that it’s a lie. You love my daughter more then yourself which is why you pushed her away,” I said moving closer to him. “You broke her heart that day in the hospital because you know that you can’t change and you didn’t want to drag her into the life you live. You were protecting her.” He glanced back at me and I could see in is eyes that I had guessed the truth. All of his men stared at Billy as the realization hit them too. “I figured it out immediately and it was confirmed this evening but I was selfish. I didn’t want you to take another of my children. I didn’t realize that you hadn’t taken Alana but that she had given herself to you,” I admitted, a tear rolling down my face as Billy turned around. “Maybe it was fate that you should be the one to order my son’s death. Maybe that only brought you and Alana closer together and showed you that you could hang on to each other through every heart aches.” I moved to stand in front of him. “I may never be able to completely forgive you for the death of my son but I’m willing to try for Alana.” I pressed my palms together in submission. I surrendered all my hope into the young man standing in front of me. “Please go to Alana. She wants you and only you. You are meant for each other.” There was a moment of dead quiet as my words sunk in. Then all of a sudden it was as if the man before me transformed. Billy seemed to grow younger and taller right before my eyes.

“What are you all fucking waiting around for?” he yelled without anger at his men. His light blue eyes fastened on me. “My daughter’s coming.”

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Normal POV (Alana)

I painted as another contraction left. I sank back into the pillow behind me and tried to regain my breath. The contraction were getting closer together and hurt like hell. I knew that it wasn’t much longer before my daughter would make her appearance. The last time the Doctor had check my cervix it had been seven inches.

“You’re doing wonderful baby,” my mother said handing me some water.

“Why aren’t the drugs kicking in?’ I asked. Collins had given me some about fifteen minutes ago but I still felt the same.

“I don’t know honey. Just relax, you’re doing great and it’s not much longer,” she said pushing back some hair from my warm face. A threw my head back as the next contraction came. I bit my already bleeding lip to keep the scream from coming out.

“Just let it out honey! When I had you I was screaming like a banshee,” my mom told me. The problem was that I wanted to scream out Billy’s name. The more the contractions came the more I wished Billy were here. I knew I had been kidding myself before. I needed Billy so much. The contraction passed after a few minutes of agony.

“Is she coming yet?” I asked in anger. I wanted my baby girl to be born already. She was taking her sweet time.

“Soon…” my mom seemed to look like she wanted to say something else but a commotion outside made her stop. The door burst open.

“You can’t all go in there,” cried my nurse’s voice as eleven people walked into my room. My heart nearly stopped beating when I saw Billy.

“Alana!” screamed Cat and Ally as they rushed to my side. My mom covered me up before the guys crowded around me.

“How are you doing?” asked Baggy.

“Is the little ruggrat giving you trouble?” put in Heco.

“Do you need anything?” said Jamie.

“I’m fine guys. It’s good to see you all,” I said smiling. It was so good to see all their faces again. “What are you all doing here?”

“Are you kidding?” said Bodie.

“We wouldn’t miss this for the world,” said Dog.

“We’re all going to be fucking uncles--and aunts,” Heco added when the girls gave him a look.

“I’m sorry but there is only one person allowed in this room,” said the mad nurse, pushing herself into the room. “Please decide who stays and the rest move to the waiting room!” The guys gave her cold glares but my mom pushed them out of the room. I saw my dad in the crowd before he left as well. The only person left in the room was Billy and my mom.

“Good luck honey,” my mom said moving to my side and giving me a peck on the cheek.

“Wait! Where are you going?” I asked franticly as I saw her smile as she closed the door behind her. Come back! I thought. Don’t leave me with him! As much as I had wanted Billy now that he was here I wanted him out.

“What do you want?!” I yelled angrily. “Get out.”

“I see that the month hasn’t cooled your temper,” he said leisurely strolling to my side.

“Go fuck one of your whores,” I screamed. “I don’t want you here.”

“That’s not what your dad said,” Billy answered standing right next to me.

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re dad came to get me. He said that you were begging for me,” he smirked. I swear that if I didn’t have needles stuck in me I would have lunged at him.

“I didn’t beg for you,” I said lifting my chin up in pride. “Now kindly fuck off.” Billy chuckled as he ran a finger down my cheek. I tried to bite him but he was too fast.

“You’re feisty even while in labor,” he said smiling at me with his blue eyes. I was going to respond with a lengthy speech with many swearwords when a contraction hit me. I grabbed hold of the first thing that my hands could grasp and waited the pain out. After it had passed I found that Billy was whispering comforting words to me and that I had grasped his strong warm hand. I quickly let go of it and shot him an outraged look. All I got from him was a chuckle.

“Hello again,” came Doctor Collins' voice as he walked into the room. “It’s good to see you here Mr. Darley. Now Miss Hume---.”

“Like hell you are,” Billy said angrily looking down at me. “It’s Darley.”

“Just ignore him, it’s Hume,” I retorted meeting his angry eyes.

“Over my fucking dead body. It’s Ms. Darley,” he said stubbornly.

“Now you listen here Billy Darley, I’m not---holy mother of god,” I ended clutching my stomach as the worse contraction yet hit me.

“You’re ready to start pushing my dear,” the Doctor said. He called a nurse and she got started on preparing for the arrival of my daughter.

“Why did you break my heart?” I screamed at Billy as the pain enveloped me. I grabbed his hand at the same time, needing his strength.

“Because I love you,” he said gentle, leaning towards me.

“Push,” the doctor commanded. I did as he asked but my focus was on Billy.

“I didn’t want you to live in the kind of life I have. I was trying to protect you,” he admitted placing his other hand over our intertwined ones.

“Push,” came the doctors voice from far away.

“Did you cheat on me?” I asked through clenched teeth, the pain was unbelievable.

“Never,” Billy replied kissing my forehead. “Why did I need another woman when I had you?”

“Ms. Darley or Hume, I see a head and you have to give a huge push when the next contraction hits, do you understand?” The doctor said. I nodded and looked into Billy’s blue eyes for courage.

“I love you Alana. I won’t ever leave you or our daughter. Everything I said before was a lie.”

“I love you Billy,” I said smiling as I felt my broken heart knit back together.

“Now,” commanded the doctor. I threw my head back and screamed as I pushed as hard as I could. My vision dimmed as I felt something separate from my body. As the first rays of dawn entered my hospital room, I heard the cry of a baby. I looked over to find Collins cutting the umbilical cord and wraping my crying daughter in a pink blanket.

“Congratulations,” said Doctor Collins placing the tiny weight into my arms before leaving to deliver the good news. I looked down to find the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life. My daughter stopped crying as she stretched her tiny arms to the sky and slowly open her almond shaped eyes. My smile grew as a familiar pair of blue eyes meet mine. She cocked her head to the side as we studied each other. She had soft skin and tiny limbs that looked so fragile. Her head was covered in my own black hair and she even had my red lips. But her eyes and nose she got from her father, she even had that intense gaze that Billy had wooed me with.

“She’s beautiful,” I whispered lifting my hand to caress her rosy cheeks. My daughter reached up and grab the finger in a strong grip.

“Yeah…” was Billy’s only response as he stared in shock at our daughter.

“Nothing witty to say Billy?” I teased watching his speechless face. Our daughter looked at her father and a small smile appeared on her face before she held her hands up to him. “She wants you to hold her.”

“Oh no, I couldn’t,” he said with a frightened look. “I could hurt her!”

“You won’t, here,” I lifted her and passed her to Billy.

“Alana no,” he said in a scared voice. I had never seen this side of him.

“You’ll do fine,” I told him. He cradled her in his arm like she was the most fragile and precious thing in the world.

“My god she’s so small,” he said in wonder as his daughter continued to look at him. He walked around the room and gently rocked her. He was a natural.

“She needs a name,” I said laying back in bed exhausted as I watched father and daughter.

“I thought a lot about it and…what about Ava?” Billy asked almost shyly.

“Ava Darley,” I said testing it out. “I like it. For the middle name I was thinking Dawn since she was born during that time.”

“Ava Dawn Darley,” Billy said looking down at his daughter. “It fits her.” He came over to me with a rare, glowing smile and kissed my lips. “How are you feeling?”

“Exhausted,” I said tiredly. “Ava had me up the whole night.” It was then that everyone decided to make their entrance.

“Alana!” they cried.

“Are you okay?” asked Luc.

“Where’s the baby?” asked Heco. They all stood shock still when they spotted her in Billy’s arms. Like she knew that she was the center of attention she gave a little joyful cry. They all surrounded Billy and Ava in a matter of seconds as I laughed.

“She’s so precious!” commented my mom.

“Look at those tiny little fingers,” said Cat.

“Shit! She got your eyes dawg,” cried Bodie looking from daughter to father.

“Good thing she got Alana’s hair,” joked Baggy. Billy managed to hit the back of his head without disturbing Ava.

“So what’s my granddaughter’s name?” asked my dad turning to look at me.

“Ava Dawn Darley,” I said.

“That’s pretty,” said Spink.

“Can we hold her?” asked Jamie.

“Yeah put if you drop her I’ll fucking rearrange your face,” Billy said. As soon as he put her in Jamie’s arms Ava started crying.

“Give her to me, she hates you,” said Heco taking Ava from Jamie. Ava continued to cry.

“Your fucking face is scaring her.” Baggy took her from Heco but still she wouldn’t stop crying. It was funny to watch the guys pass her around and arguing on who should hold the baby.

“Give Ava to me you faggots,” commanded Billy when she continued crying. As soon as she was in Billy’s arms she went quiet and snuggled against this warm chest.

“Well I’ll be damned,” whistled Dog.

“Who thought that Billy would be so good with kids?” teased Bodie. Billy didn’t even rise to the bait as he looked lovingly at his baby girl.

“How are you feeling?” my dad asked making his way to my bed.

“Tired,” I said taking his hand. “Thank you. I know it must have been hard for you.”

“You deserve to be happy Alana and he makes you happy. It wasn’t right for me to stand in your way,” he said kissing my cheeks and looking back at his first grandchild.

I had never been so happy in my entire life. I wished so badly that Brendan, Joe and Tommy were still alive to see this day. But deep down I knew that they were here in spirit.

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I opened my eyes to find that it was dark outside. After the doctor’s had ushered everyone from the room, they had cleaned me up and ordered that I get some sleep. Billy had kissed me and had said that he would look after Ava. I had no doubt about that, she wasn’t even on this earth for a day and she already had him wrapped around her finger. I looked over to see that there was a small light on in the corner and a shadow walking around the room.

“Billy?” I called out.

“Yeah,” he said coming closer. I saw that Ava was in his arms. It was strange to her head resting against the tribal tattoo and her fingers securely holding Billy’s thumb as she slept. “She wouldn’t let the other kids sleep so they had me take her,” he explained at my raised eyebrow.

“I see,” I said.

“Go back to bed babe. You need your rest,” he said.

“Can I have a kiss first?” I smiled seductively. Billy’s eyes flashed with passion as he leaned in, making sure not to wake Ava. I felt heat engulf my body as his lips moved on mine. My flesh was on fire from need as I slipped my tongue into his mouth. He groaned then nibbled my bottom lip. God it felt so good---until a baby cry disturbed us. I chuckled as we broke the kiss and looked down at Ava.

“I guess she doesn’t like to be ignored,” Billy commented, standing up and rocking her back in forth.

“Who does that remind you of?” I grinned. He shot me a smirk as I laid back down. I fell asleep with the image of the two people closest in my heart and the feeling that the future held nothing but hope and happiness.