Emotions Run Wild

I couldn’t wait to get into the cafeteria; it meant actually being able to feel my own emotions. It was like a slice of mortality being able to feel my own emotions again. Alice was still smug and that confused me. Instead of lightly holding my hand and dancing her way around like she usually did, she grasped onto my arm and if I had been human it would have hurt.

Glaring towards Bella’s table as we entered, I smiled lightly when I stepped into the blank spot. Looking more closely at Bella’s usual table I could hear Jessica calling Scarlett a freak and Bella attempting to defend her but getting the treatment right back.

As soon as Scarlett looked up I could see a change in her usual blank, emotionless eyes. I could see angry in them; angry that I was feeling and could justify. I was startled when that angry I could see reflected in the depths of her eyes resulted in her slamming Jessica’s face into her pizza.

Something I could only describe as pride rang through my body causing a smile to drop onto my face as Jessica stood and glared at her before turning to the principle, who thanks to luck, had seen nothing.

Helping Bella up, I could see the tears starting to well up in her brown eyes. Bella never took insults very well but what Jessica had said had been cruel and beyond rude that I found myself wanting to rip her apart for harming a friend of mine.

Unfortunately for me, Bella and Scarlet both exited the room Edward not far behind and my wonderful opportunity to feel my emotions was gone, just out of reach. It was only after Scarlett was gone that Alice released my arm and danced to our usual table and started picking at her food. Following behind Rose and Emmett, I sat down beside my wife who I had come to discover was jealous.

The rest of the day was uneventful and I was praying for a brain hemorrhage to end my suffering when I remembered I wasn’t human. This only deepened my depression as Jessica and Lauren walked by, causing a rift of horrible feelings to settle into my stomach.
Angry, hurt and devious were three of the more prominent feelings I was getting a read of, leading me to believe that these two were most definitely not done with Scarlett or for that matter, Bella. And with days till Bella’s birthday, I was not in anyway, moved to think they wouldn’t strike then.

Contrary to popular belief amongst my family, I wasn’t able to filter everyone’s emotions and so they piled up till the weekend when I would go off on my own and let out the pain from the week’s worth of concentrated pain and silence. I took my anger out on the animals I hunted, often leaving them mutilated in horrific ways. If I was capable of deciphering my own feelings, I am sure I would have felt remorse for my actions.

As we exited the school ourselves and approached the convertible that was Rose’s favorite vehicle I found myself incredibly curious as to what Scarlett was doing. I knew Edward had wanted to speak to her; had he done so, was she at our home with Bella and Edward? If she was I wonder if she would sit in the chair beneath the large glass windows that took over the back of our home. I could imagine the way the light would reflect off the rest of the glass around the room, the way it would lighten her hair as it lay against it.

Was Alice right to be jealous; was I actually developing more of my own feelings for Scarlett?