The Music Teacher

I woke up next to him, he had an arm draped across my waist and his head was in my chest, admittedly yeah we did have sex last night, but I couldn’t help but picture Brian throughout, I had the sudden feeling that I had done this all wrong, I should have stayed with him. But that would have meant losing Zacky, and you see I’ve known him since we were born, he’s been the only person to understand the majority of my problems, hell he’s the only person who knows the truth about my scars, I couldn’t bring myself to tell anyone but he found me.


Flashback

I couldn’t believe it, I caught her and someone else, I just want to die.

‘I love you Ruth’

Yeah right, if you fucking loved me then you wouldn’t have gone off with some fake skank bitch, I feel worthless. I felt hatred run through me as I picked up the blade and brought it to my wrist, look what you’ve made me do Lynn-Z, I wasn’t good enough for you so who am i good enough for? No one? Well then let me end this now. I dug the blade in deep and watched as the crimson liquid spilled out onto the pristine white bathroom floor, I went for it again only this time digging in deeper and making the slice longer, everything started to blur as I went to cut again but the blade was taken from me and I had to large tattooed arms around me.

“Ruth! Come on Ru! Wake up, don’t do this to me!”

I nearly killed myself that day, it was a stupid thing for me to do, but I guess at the time I really felt like dying, Zacky obviously had other ideas and for that I am grateful, he knows that, he knows I would gladly give my own life to save him.

I gave up the man I truly love with all my heart just to keep him here. I sat down at his table and got myself a drink, I flicked through my phone, deciding to listen to the voicemail.


Ruth, please answer me. It doesn’t have to end like this, I don’t want to lose you, I need you Ruth.

Tears fell from my eyes as I heard him sobbing into the phone,


Please come back, I.....I love you.

I just broke down, tear flowing freely down my face and onto my arms.

Did I make the right choice?

“What have I done?”