Untitled

Eclipse Parody

Edward: I'm going to ask again, will you marry me Bella?
Bella: No, sorry
Edward: Marry me Bitch
Bella: No you bastard!
(Arrives at Edward's house)
Jacob: Hey Bella
(Punches her in the face knocking her out)
Bella: what the hell was that for mutt!
Jacob: I felt like it
Edward: I would have done it too (Whispers)
Jacob: The red headed leech is after you
Bella: OH NO! She found me!
(Dramatic music)
Carlisle: What the fuck is that music for!
Bella: Victoria found me
Carlisle: OH NO! Like I give a shit (storms off
Bella: What's his problem?
Edward: You are (murmurs)
Bella: Did I ask you leech
Edward: I don’t know why I ask to marry you
Jacob: You two timing bastard
Edward: Jacob I'm sorry
Bella: What are you two girls talking about
Jacob: We were going out, but you had to ruin it
(Bella gasps)
Victoria: Look what we have here, the mutt, a gay vampire and a stupid human
Edward: Do you mind were having a conversation so...... PISS OFF
(Victoria hisses)
Victoria: Give me Bella
Edward: If you will go away then fine here
(Edward shoves Bella to Victoria)
Bella: Edward please
Edward: What now you whiny little bitch
Bella: I can’t believe I ever loved you, you BASTARD!
(Bella gets a stake out of nowhere and stabs Edward through the heart)
Jacob: You bitch you killed him
(Jacob rips her to shreds)
Victoria: You moron, she was mine to kill
(Victoria shrieked then bites Jacob killing him instantly)
Victoria: Now I can kill everyone in folks
(Laughs evilly then disappeared into the woods)
Carlisle: Look at this Fucking mess!
Esme: come back to bed, I'm waiting (Esme called from inside the house)
Carlisle: Coming sweetheart (Looks at the dead bodies shrugs then walk into the house)
♠ ♠ ♠
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