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Bella: Dad I’m…..
Charlie (Dad): PREGNANT
(He picks up his gun and shoots Bella, unfortunately she bounces right back up)
Bella: You Bastard… I was going to say Edward and I are engaged
(He shoots her again, she down for longer I think she finally dead… oh crap she back why wont you die… DIE BITCH DIE!!!)
Charlie: To a loser like him
Bella: I know but what can you do?
Charlie: Yeah you’re right, anyway have fun
Bella: I will bye (walks out the door)

The wedding day

Priest: Do you Bella swan take Edward Cullen to be your husband?
Bella: Yes I guess
Priest: Do you Edward Cullen take Bella swan to be your wife?
Edward: whatever
Priest: Ok…. I now pronounce you husband and wife you may kiss the bride
(They both kiss for like ages, I know they kind of hate each but with their love life.. you don’t want to know… theirs one hormonal human and a never mind
On their honeymoon
(Island Esme)
Edward: So what you want to do now
Bella: I have an idea (she smirks)
Edward: Again?
Bella: we only have 2 days left
Edward: Thank god
Bella: Shut up
(They start making out… and that’s all you’re going to hear)
The next morning
Bella: Why am I covered in feathers?
Edward: I bit a pillow so what
Bella: Look at what you down to my body you fucking freak
(Bella said looking at the yellow bruises on her)
Edward: If you don’t shut up I’ll break you neck
Bella: Whatever
Edward: Want to do it again?
Bella: ….. OK!
(They start doing in ….. again jeesh there going at it like wild animals)
The next day
Bella: EDWARD!!
Why was she shouting it was obvious he wasn’t here, if I could I knock some common sense into the bitch …. Anyway back to the lame story.

Note: Bitch, gone hunting I don’t know when I’ll be back I might not even come back at all hopefully you’ll be dead but if not oh well what you going to do. Edward
Bella read the note then tore it up
Bella: Selfish prick
(Bella starts to throw up)
Edward comes back just what we wanted
Edward: Bitch throws up somewhere else
Bella: Idiot not like I can help it
(She rushes to the bathroom and puke again for 10 minutes no joke it was nasty)
Edward: what the hells wrong with you
Bella: I don’t know I’m not a doctor go call Carlisle not that he’s any good
Edward walked away leaving Bella thinking… wow she can think I didn’t even know she had a brain
Bella: OH NO I’M PREGNANT

5 weeks later

Bella: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Edward: Shut up it only crack you rib you moany slut
Bella: Excuse me I never slept with anyone but you
Edward: Oh cut the crap we all know you slept with Jacob
Bella: Oh right forgot about that
Edward: Oh who cares I slept with Jessica
Bella: Doesn’t everybody

2 weeks later

Jacob: Get the baby out of her you dumb bloodsucker
Edward: Shut up mutt

Hours later Bella’s a vampire but we all wish she hadn’t made it cant someone just kill her.

Reenesme: Jakey jakey my hairy mutt come here
Jacob: I’m so glad I’d imprinted on you
Bella: What you molestering bastard
(Bella kills Jacob)
Nessie: No mummy you bitch
(Nessie kills Bella) FINALLY goo Nessie!!!!
Nessie taste blood vampire blood then goes mad
Nessie: I’m coming ………. For you all
(Voltri comes out the forest)
Jane: Oh no evil vampire spawn kill you little baby bitch
(Nessie was too quick and stronger she killed them all then disappeared FOR EVER)