Earthquake

I remember every glance you shot me

I miss him. It's true. I wish it wasn't, but it is. No matter how much I try to deny it, I can't escape it. I miss him. I want him. I need him. I hope this isn't as hard for him as it is for me.

I lay in Angela's guest room listening to the loud crashing of the rain.

Splash. Splash. Splash.

The violent winds shoved the rain hard against the window.

"Emerson?"

It was a man's voice. Was it Frank? No. Stop imagining things.

I sat up and turned to face the voice.

"What did you do to your hair?" It was Gerard.

"I cut it," I responded bluntly.

His mouth formed into a half smile. I stared at him coldly.

"How did you find me? Why are you here? Frank's not with you, is he?" Anger and desperation cut through my words.

"I called your sister and she told me you were here. No. Frank's not with me, and I came because I have something important to tell you."

He walked over to me and sat down on my bed. I knew what he was about to say.

"No," I said looking at him, "I'm not coming back."

He shook his head.

"I didn't mean that. I don't know how to tell you this....Frank's..." He faltered.

I looked at him expectantly.

"Frank's in the hospital." He said it in one breath, trying to get the words out as quickly as possible.

I froze. Everything froze. I couldn't comprehend it. It wasn't clicking.

Then everything started moving again, faster this time. The truth was suffocating me. I tried to suppress my tears. I tried to suppress my anger. Anger, not at Frank, but at myself. It was my fault. I did this.

I squoze so hard I stopped your heart from beating