It's Not You. It's Me. And No! He is Not My Boyfriend!

I sat on Carter’s bed as I awaited his return from putting his brother to bed. Something, I assumed, that wouldn’t be too difficult considering he managed to sleep through my horrified screaming. I lounged on Carter’s lush full bed, bidding my time trying to figure out if I should splay my body on the left, right, or in the middle of the bed. Decisions. Decisions.

“What are you doing?” Carter eyed me suspiciously as he had entered his room to me rolling around on his bed much like a dog rolls around on a carpet when its back itches.

“Trying to figure out which side I should lay on. There’s so much space!”

“You act like you’ve never seen a full bed before. Let me make the decision easy for you,” he chuckled as he took a spot on the right side of the bed.

“Where are you parents?” I rolled around to face him.

He moved so our faces were pressed up against each other and our legs intertwined.

“They’re at some Halloween party for some friend blah blah blah.”

“Glad to see you’ve worked on your listening skills.”

“Hey! Its my mom’s fault! She insists on telling me things while I’m playing video games!”

I rolled my eyes, deciding not continue the argument by telling him the simple solution. It involved his finger and the pause button.

“How was the party last night?” Carter edged himself closer to me if that was at all possible, considering the only parts of our bodies that didn’t touch were the ones flesh covered.

“You know,” I shrugged nonchalantly. I decided telling him of Matthew Perkins’s little stunt was not a good idea. “it was pretty normal. Girls in almost nothing, alcohol, dancing. The usual. Melissa went as a Playboy bunny.”

“Real creative.”

“Well, in the long run it didn’t really matter. Her costume was off about a half hour after the party started. I’m sure it’s on You Tube at this point.”

Carter shook his head with disappointment, cheapened by the smile on his lips.

“That girl has enough footage of herself in various states of undressed to have her own porno website.”

“What is it with you and creating pornos?”

“I’m a guy! We think about food and sex. Pornography is a logical strain of thought.”

“Whatever,” I yawned while stretching my arms out. “It’s getting late I better get going.”

Carter wrapped his arms around me, preventing me from moving, and then buried his head into my neck.

“Stay a little longer,” he murmured.

I heaved a tired sigh. I was sleepy, but of course I didn’t want to leave. It really didn’t take much begging from Carter to convince me that I should stay a little while longer. Besides, the clock read 11:47, and everyone knows that one can’t leave on such an odd time as that.

“Yay!” he cheered softly, seeing that I had complied, before kissing my lightly on the forehead.

“So I wanna know something.”

“Yes, I make sure to wash behind my ears with soap. How else do you think I get all the fly ladies?”

“I would venture a guess that you exploit your brother’s cuteness.”

“That too. All I need is a puppy and I’ll be a bachelor machine!”

“When did you start liking me?” It was a question that had been on my mind ever since Carter admitted his six year long crush on me. I knew that he had started having feelings for me in seventh grade, but I never knew the exact story. And, considering his feelings outwardly never changed, I couldn’t pin point the exact time myself.

“Seventh grade...duh!”

“I know, but when. What event made you start to see me as something more than a friend?”

“I don’t keep records Ellis. I think we need pet names,” he stroked his chin thoughtfully.

“That later. This,” I lightly brushed his lips with mine to keep him focused. “Now.”

“Okay, okay. But,” he pointed a warning finger at me. “We better be doing some serious kissing later.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I yawned loudly. “Just start.”

“Hmmm,” Carter looked up towards the ceiling as if his memory was being projected there. “Do you remember our Field Day that year?”

“Or lack there of, considering it rained. That day was horrible! Damien called Melissa fat or something like that, and she spent the entire day in the locker room crying. Well, half day really, but you know what I mean.”

“Yeah, she was a drama queen. Big surprise. But, I’m talking about what you did to Damien to get back at him for being such a jerk.”

“I don’t remember what I did.”

Carter chuckled heartily before continuing.

“It was amazing! You waited until the free pizza came so everyone would be in the cafeteria, and then you pants him! Boxers and all!” another fit of laughter erupted from him.

“Ahh I get it now. You realized that you didn’t really enjoy penises on that very day, and since I was conveniently standing behind Damien you decided to like me instead.”

“Something like that. I knew you were different. Special.”

I cooed a little, giving Carter an eskimo kiss.

“I didn’t think you were smart enough to dissect your feelings like that back then.”

“Come on now! Give me some credit. What about you?”

“I’ll let you know when the moment happens!”

“You’re a meanie!” Carter shoved me with a pout. “If you were cast in the Yellow Submarine, you’d be cast as a Blue Meanie!”

“How long have you been sitting on that one?”

“Watched the movie with my brother last week. Tell me!” he grabbed my face in both of his hands.

“Okay, okay! Fine! I would have to say it was sophomore year at the last Student Council Dance before Hockey season began.”

“I sure do love Hockey season! You do know we have a hockey team right?”

“Yeah.”

“And that I’m on it?”

“...yeah,” I didn’t really know that. Somewhere in my distant and faint memory I could recall seeing Carter playing in a hockey game, but I couldn’t tell if that was my mind wanting me to believe or if it was a real memory.

“Seriously? You’re like at every game!”

“For the violence! So unless you got your skull cracked open I wouldn’t have taken much notice.”

“You’re unbelievable!” he shook his head with a slight chuckle. “Whatever. Continue.”

“Well, remember how upset I was because that loser Danny decided to break up with me at the dance.”

“How could I forget? I went through half the night with a wet shoulder because of it!”

“I was sad! I really liked him.”

“Whatever. I told you he was bad news.”

“I believe your word were something like, ‘He must be a loser. Only losers would date you.’”

“Well, I was right. He was a loser.”

“Whatever. The point was that because of him I was crying on your shoulder during a slow song. It was then that I began to notice how attractive you’d gotten. I guess I just forced myself to deny it because we were supposed to hate each other.”

“Believe me,” Carter kissed me deeply. “I could never hate you.”

I cuddled up closer to Carter, pressing my face into his chest to feel the warmth of his body.

***
I awoke with a start to the sound of my phone ringing.

“Hello?” I mumbled, not opening my eyes and cursing whoever decided to call me on what I assumed was a Sunday afternoon.

“Ellis!” my fathers voice warned over the phone.

“Dad?” my eyes snapped open to find myself staring at Carter’s navy blue T-shirt.

“You’re mother is pacing. I think it’s time for you to come home.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost two in the morning.”

“Shoot! I fell asleep! I’ll be home soon!” with that, I hung up the phone to jostle Carter awake.
“Carter!” I shook him only to receive a half conscious moan. “Carter!” I yelled a bit, causing him to snap up.

“What’s wrong?” he searched frantically around him.

“Nothing’s wrong. We fell asleep. I gotta go it’s late.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost two.”

“Shit,” Carter said while stretching. “I wonder where my parents are, and DON’T even say it! I’ll walk you to the door.”

I quickly gathered my things and headed for the front door. I wished I could’ve just spent the night. They only thing I hated more than driving was driving late at night. It enhanced the scariness of driving by two fold. Drunk drivers, hidden animals, crazy ax men that jump into your car at red lights.
“Talk to you tomorrow?” Carter nuzzled the top of my head while I put on my coat.

“Yeah,” I yawned before standing on my tippy toes to give him a kiss. “Talk to you tomorrow.”

“Drive safe.”

“Will do.”