It's Not You. It's Me. And No! He is Not My Boyfriend!

“I really suck, huh?” Carter sighed as he walked me to my door.

“Carter!” this whole situation was getting annoying and old. Things would be cute for awhile. Carter would mess up, or in this case think he messed up, and he would go into a self loathing/ dote upon phase until things really exploded. I was ready for a bit of normalacy. “Cut it out okay! Why are you letting fucking Matthew Perkins get to you?”

“But he’s right, Ellis! You deserve better than me!”
 “Carter Randolph Jenkins! You cut this out right now!”

“My middle name is totally not Randolph.”

“Doesn’t matter, I’m making a point here! You are not a perfect boyfriend. No guy would be. You’re going to make mistakes. I’m going to make mistakes, believe it or not.”

“Oh there’s that modesty you’re so famous for.”

“Shutty. The point is that we’re both going to make mistakes, but we can’t beat ourselves up over them! We need to talk about them, like we’re doing now,” I gestured to the space between us for dramatic effect. “And work through our mistakes together! Okay?” I paused waiting for Carter to respond. When he didn’t, I place my hands on each cheek and forced him to look into my eyes. “Okay,” I repeated before giving him a soft kiss on the lips.

Carter wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in, turing my soft kiss into a deep one.

“What were we talking about again?” he murmured, our noses still touching, once our lips had parted.

I chuckled and wrapped my arms around his waist, laying my head on his chest.

“I wish we still had that cabin.”

“You and me both sistah! Especially after you just said that!”

“You’re ridiculous!”

“And you should meet my family! Tomorrow!”

“That’s how you’re going to drop that bomb on me?”

“It seemed like a good moment. We were getting along and stuff.”

“Sure, we segway from an innuendo about your boner to meeting your family. Seems to make sense to me.”

“I hate you. Come tomorrow.”

“Oh, well, when you sweet talk me like that!” I held up my hands in the air emphatically.

“Come on,” Cater leaned down to sprinkle kisses along my neckline. “There will be good food!”

“You know my one weakness.”

“So you’ll come?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“In essence, yes. However, my mother will bug me to invite you to every family gathering until you say yes, so for my sake, you’re coming.”

“Fine! The things one does for love, right?”

“Damn straight!” Carter gave me one last passionate kiss before heading to his car.

***

I tapped my foot impatiently as Carmen riffled through my closet. I had one half hour before I had to arrive at the Jenkins’s house for the family affair, and freaking out wouldn’t even begin to describe how I was feeling. Meeting the family was a big and nerve wracking event in a relationship. Not only did it mean that Carter and I were seriously serious, it was going to be completely and totally awkward. I was going to be like a science project on display for his whole family to poke and prod at me, deciding whether or not I fit to be with Carter.

“Here!” Carmen threw a black garment in my direction. I had called upon her for advice in picking out my outfit as she had been through the exact same experience a year before. “This dress is perfect!”

I lifted the dress to inspect it further. It was simple black short sleeve frock.

“Perfect!” I cheered before rushing to the bathroom to put it on.

Carmen circled around me after I had finished putting together my finals outfit. I cinched the black frock at the waist with an oversized black belt, pairing the outfit with a pair of bright orange ballet flats and a chunky rhinestone necklace. I pulled my hair back into a purposefully messy pony tail, to show off the small studs(bright orange to match my shoes) in each ear. I had even applied a very little amount of make up. It was a special occasion after all.

“You look AMAZING!” Carmen chirped launching herself at me. “Carter’s family will love you!”
 “I hope so!” dread began to creep in as I glanced over at the clock. It was time for me to go.

“Don’t worry girl! You got this!” Carmen spouted inspirational material as she followed me down stairs.

I grabbed my coat, the bottle of wine my mom insisted I bring, my purse, and my car keys before heading out the door. Parting ways with Carmen at my car, I hopped in and started on my way to Carter’s house. With each mile closer, my stomach muscles clenched harder until I was stopped in front of his house.

I quickly made my way to the the front door in an attempt to out run the cold and rang the door bell. I was entering the belly of the beast.