50 Myths That Could Ruin Your Life

“Oh. Oh, hi,” I stammered.

“How’re you?” he asked politely.

“Oh, I’m good,” I said, even though what I really meant was, Oh, you know, fine, since every time I think you of you and how you screwed me over I want to take a crowbar and remove your damn eyeballs. “How’re you?” I asked, even though I what I wanted to say was, “I hope you rot in hell, jackass.”

“I’m good.” He pursed his lips. “So, seeing anyone?”

“A-actually,” I stammered, “I am.”

“Oh? Who?” he asked, looking surprised.

What, you think you’re impossible to get over?

“Um, well, he…” I pretended to look through the crowd, ransacking my brain for any plan to help me out of the huge mess I had fallen into in less than forty-five seconds. “He’s not here yet, but he’ll be here soon.”

“What’s his name?” Brian persisted.

“Um, it’s… it’s Alec,” were the stupid words that popped out of my mouth, and I was almost sure they would be my demise.

“Alec who?”

I laughed nervously. “All the questions! I mean, geez, you think you held interrogations for a living or something!” I turned to Brandon, who looked like he was about to start sucking face with the guy he was standing with. “Brandon, Brandon!”

He snapped his head around. “What?”

“I need to have a talk with you.”

“No.”

“B—”

“No.”

“Fine then,” I muttered, crossing my arms.

“So, where’s your boyfriend at?” Brian asked. He checked the time on his cell phone. “The movie’s about to start and… he’s still not here! Aw, Carla, did he—”

Before Brian would finish his sentence and force me to use my (non-existent) “ninja-break-dancing skills” to kick his ass, I impulsively yelled out, “Alec!” at a group of guys who I had been eyeing for the past minute or so.

Please, oh God, oh please, please, please, please, please, if there is a higher power, any, be it Krishna, Jesus, Allah, or the Force, please let there be a cute guy named Alec who will—

“Yeah?” One of the guys turned around. He had short black hair, messy in a hot way, like the lead singer from Hot Chelle Rae, and was wearing a red-and-black checkered shirt with a black vest over it, skinny jeans, and Converses.

Myth # 16: Miracles don’t exist.

I rushed over to him. I enveloped him into a hug as he stood there stiffly in shock. “I’m sorry, do I kn—”

“There’s no time for this. My name’s Carla. Would you be willing to do me the biggest favor in the universe?” I spoke rapidly.

“Um, well, it—”

“Look, my friend brought some people to the movies, and one of them is my ex who totally broke my heart and he wanted to know if I had a boyfriend and I told him yes so he wouldn’t think I was totally pathetic and—” I took a huge deep breath and continued my super-speed rambling, “he asked the name so I told him the first name that popped into my head, which was Alec, and then he started to say that my boyfriend stood me up but I can’t have that so I really really really really need you to—”

“Pretend to be your boyfriend?” Alec finished for me.

I nodded as I tried to regulate my breathing.

“Um, well, I dunno…”

“I’ll pay for the movies and buy you whatever you want to eat,” I blurted out.

He still hesitated.

“Come on, isn’t it bad enough that I’ve made a total fool of myself in front of your friends, who, by the way, are freaking me out with the staring.” I shot a glare at them and they averted their gazes. “Plus, he, my ex, is gonna know I lied to him. Oh, please, please—”

“So is this the infamous Alec?” Brian sauntered over and slung an arm around my shoulder.

I stared at Alec, wide-eyed, wondering what he would possibly say.