Eternal Illusion
Time Lapse
“Will you marry me?” Shou asked looking sure of himself. I didn’t know what to tell him. Part of me screamed to say no and the other yes. Both would cause him great pain.
His smile started to fade. I swallowed the lump in my throat and inhale. “Yes, I’ll marry you,” I finally said and Shou slipped the ring on my finger. His strong arms pulled me close to him and embraced me. I blinked back the tears that fought to break free. Shou’s hands framed my face and he pressed his lips to mine. His hands dropped to my waist and my arms wrapped around his neck. His kiss grew deeper and it caused me to shutter.
“Can I stay with you tonight?” I barely whispered between kisses. Shou’s lips left mine for a second.
“Absolutely,” he replied and crushed his lips against mine.
It ended all too soon. Shou pulled away and smiled at me. A tear streamed down my face and I quickly wiped it away and turned my back to him. “What’s wrong?” he asked and lightly touched my shoulder. I wanted to tell him everything but I was afraid. I was afraid for several reasons. I was afraid I’d be forgotten when I left. I was afraid if I told him he wouldn’t want me anymore. And I was afraid most of all that it would hurt him.
I shook my head unable to say anything to him. He wrapped his arms around me and I turned so my face was buried into his chest. “Please just hold me, Shou,” I cried softly and he did. I laid against him as he embraced me while I cried softly. His breath finally became even again and I looked up to see he was asleep. I kissed his chest several times. “I’m so sorry, Shou,” I sobbed.
I sat up and took my necklace off. Next I took off my engagement ring and placed it on the necklace. I put it around Shou’s neck and kissed his lips softly. “Please be happy,” I told him and left the room.
*****************
Several months passed by since I left. I’ve gotten worse. Sometimes I wake up and not remember who I am and sometimes I can’t remember anything at all. I was a mess and the apartment I stayed in was covered in bloody writing. I had written Shou’s name on the wall with my own bloody tears so I would never forget him. Forgetting myself was forgivable, but forgetting Shou was the greatest sin. I would never forgive myself.
7 MONTHS SINCE HATSUMEI LEFT
Shou sat on the couch staring at his phone daring it to ring. “He’s never going to stop trying is he?” he heard Tora ask Sega. Sega shook his head.
“He still calls her every day,” Sega replied. Shou picked up the phone and dialed her number again for the fifth time that day. She had never picked up and she never deleted her messages or maybe she never listened to them.
Shou had woken up with blood covering his shirt and Hatsumei’s necklace including her engagement ring around his neck. Her house was vacant and the college said she’d dropped out. He never heard from her neither did anyone else. He dialed her number again and listened to the ringing he’d memorized.
YOUR POV
The phone rang again and I fought to not answer it, but I found myself picking up my phone and raising it to my ear. “Hello?” I answered hoarsely.
“Hatsumei? Are you ok? Where are you? I’ve been so worried,” Shou said quickly.
“I’m fine,” I answered automatically.
“Tell me where you are and I’ll come get you,” he said.
“No…you can’t see me like this,” I said my voice cracking.
“Please Hatsumei! Tell me,” he pleaded. I formed the words on my mouth but my vision turned blurry and then dark. Did I tell him or did I not make it?
His smile started to fade. I swallowed the lump in my throat and inhale. “Yes, I’ll marry you,” I finally said and Shou slipped the ring on my finger. His strong arms pulled me close to him and embraced me. I blinked back the tears that fought to break free. Shou’s hands framed my face and he pressed his lips to mine. His hands dropped to my waist and my arms wrapped around his neck. His kiss grew deeper and it caused me to shutter.
“Can I stay with you tonight?” I barely whispered between kisses. Shou’s lips left mine for a second.
“Absolutely,” he replied and crushed his lips against mine.
It ended all too soon. Shou pulled away and smiled at me. A tear streamed down my face and I quickly wiped it away and turned my back to him. “What’s wrong?” he asked and lightly touched my shoulder. I wanted to tell him everything but I was afraid. I was afraid for several reasons. I was afraid I’d be forgotten when I left. I was afraid if I told him he wouldn’t want me anymore. And I was afraid most of all that it would hurt him.
I shook my head unable to say anything to him. He wrapped his arms around me and I turned so my face was buried into his chest. “Please just hold me, Shou,” I cried softly and he did. I laid against him as he embraced me while I cried softly. His breath finally became even again and I looked up to see he was asleep. I kissed his chest several times. “I’m so sorry, Shou,” I sobbed.
I sat up and took my necklace off. Next I took off my engagement ring and placed it on the necklace. I put it around Shou’s neck and kissed his lips softly. “Please be happy,” I told him and left the room.
*****************
Several months passed by since I left. I’ve gotten worse. Sometimes I wake up and not remember who I am and sometimes I can’t remember anything at all. I was a mess and the apartment I stayed in was covered in bloody writing. I had written Shou’s name on the wall with my own bloody tears so I would never forget him. Forgetting myself was forgivable, but forgetting Shou was the greatest sin. I would never forgive myself.
7 MONTHS SINCE HATSUMEI LEFT
Shou sat on the couch staring at his phone daring it to ring. “He’s never going to stop trying is he?” he heard Tora ask Sega. Sega shook his head.
“He still calls her every day,” Sega replied. Shou picked up the phone and dialed her number again for the fifth time that day. She had never picked up and she never deleted her messages or maybe she never listened to them.
Shou had woken up with blood covering his shirt and Hatsumei’s necklace including her engagement ring around his neck. Her house was vacant and the college said she’d dropped out. He never heard from her neither did anyone else. He dialed her number again and listened to the ringing he’d memorized.
YOUR POV
The phone rang again and I fought to not answer it, but I found myself picking up my phone and raising it to my ear. “Hello?” I answered hoarsely.
“Hatsumei? Are you ok? Where are you? I’ve been so worried,” Shou said quickly.
“I’m fine,” I answered automatically.
“Tell me where you are and I’ll come get you,” he said.
“No…you can’t see me like this,” I said my voice cracking.
“Please Hatsumei! Tell me,” he pleaded. I formed the words on my mouth but my vision turned blurry and then dark. Did I tell him or did I not make it?