Living is a nightmare, suicide's reality

Chapter 4

I fucking ache. All over my body, im covered in fucking bruises. Even when that girl out in the corrider tapped me it hurt. My head's gonna explode and i can barely stand up. When the bell goes, everyone jumps to their feet, except me and Anna. My excuse it that i have just had the shit kicked out of me by the bastard i call my father. What's her excuse? She stashes soemthing away in her bag and rubs her arm. I ignore it and look at the girl next to her. She's pretty cute. Red/brown hair, black glasses, cute face. I smile at her and she looks at Anna. Anna nods and smiles at me. I smile back then again at Lisa. This time she smiles aswell. She looks cute when she smiles. Mikey looks at Anna. it's the kinda look that goes 'She's hot, i think i'll ask her out'. No chance. I'm very protective over Anna. She's already got one guy beating her up. She doesn't need another. Not that Mikey would. He looks a bit of a geek, tall, thin, glasses. He looks very organised, compared to his brother. Gerard is quite chubby, but in a cute way. Not that i'm gay. I mean i'm not homophobic either, but i just don't swing that way. He has messy, black hair and ripped jeans. He's a nice guy though. I can see why he has so many friends. Well not so many but a lot for an outcast. I don't want to sound mean but they're not exactly in with the popular crowd. At least that helps me out. I have weird obsessions sometimes and for popular people that just ain't cool. So i'm in with the outcasts. There's Bob who is a well built blonde who looks like he could squash you just by looking at you. So he's tough. He looks a bit like security for the whole gang. Then there's Ray, the dude with the coolest hair i've ever seen. Brown afro that you have to love. It just is so totally cool. Of course then there's me the small kid with spiky hair and loser clothes. Well compared to most of the people in the class it looks like i just fell out of a tumble dryer. That might have been due to the fact that i couldn't walk while coming to school and i fell into a thorn bush. I ripped my Bouncing Souls t shirt and i nearly cried. But i didn't. Not in front of Anna. She'd seen enough to last her a life time. My mind swung back to this morning. There was so much blood in the bathroom. Was it mine? I couldn't remember. But i had the vague feeling it was Anna's. She's never hurt herself before, i don't think. She would have told me, right? I'm her brother. We tell each other everything. She told me how she always wanted to ride horses when she was older. I got down on my hands and knees then and let her ride on my back. It hurt like hell though because dad had beat me yet again the morning before. He had dragged me down the stairs. I had a gigantic bruise on my back. But i still let Anna sit on me. Anything to cheer her up. Then i told her about wanting to play the guitar. And we mucked around with the music channels and played rock stars. Ok i was 8. We're totally over that stage now. We just sit and read or draw, until dad comes home. Then he beats one of us(ususally me) and then Anna will come up to me and i'll cry myself to sleep in her arms. That's how it's always been. And it's never gonna change.

Only Bob left. Why does no one ever want Bob? He's totally cool. I'll have him if no one wants him