The Day That You Fall I'll Be Right Behind You

Before Todd and I left the Grants, I gave Kirstie a hug. We cried on each other’s shoulder for a few seconds before I let go of her so she could have her JG back in her arms.

Todd led me out of the house with one arm hooked around me with Ty in his other arm. I sighed and climbed up into his truck while he buckled Ty into his car seat. I wanted to cry so badly right now, but I didn’t want to with Ty around.

The drive home was so awkwardly silent. Todd reached over and took my hand, squeezing it to let me know he was here for me, but I never looked over at him. I just continued to look out the window, numb from the news we just heard.

I loved Shaun like my own brother. The news saddened me deeply, but… I’m so worried about Kirstie. She’s such an emotional girl. News like this could not affect her in a positive way… and she’s six months pregnant.

When we got home, Todd took Tyson up to his room to put him to bed. I went up to our room and went out onto the balcony and looked up at the star filled sky. Heavy sighs came out of me as I wrapped my arms around myself.

“Kylee,” His husky voice softly spoke from behind me.

I didn’t turn around though. I stayed planted right where I was. A soft sigh came out of him as he came over and stood in front of me. He didn’t say anything. He just pulled me into a hug that I really needed.

“Ky, I know you’re a strong person, but… it’s ok to cry,” he said sweetly while holding me close to him and stroking my hair.

“I didn’t want to cry in front of Tyson,” I pushed out, feeling the tears building up already.

“He’s not here now. He’s sleeping. The only person that’s going to know is me and I’m totally fine with it. It doesn’t make me look at you as a weak person,” he went on, starting to sway us back and forth slightly.

“I don’t know what I would do without you, Todd,” I said quietly while small tears started to roll down my cheek.

“I don’t know what I would do without you. You amaze me more and more every day, Ky,” he replied, making me smile even through my tears.

I didn’t full out bawl like I thought I would. But I felt better once I did finally let it out. I was still so worried about Kirstie though. Todd told me not to worry about. She had Josh and that’s all she needed right now. I believed him, but… it really didn’t make me feel much better.

He finally got me to change into pajamas, which was his jersey, and go to bed. When I came out of the bathroom, he was lying in bed already waiting for me. As he opened his arms for me, his gorgeous smile came over that scruffy face that I fell for years ago. It made my smile form and crawl into his beefy arms.

“I feel like I should call Adam,” I sighed, relaxing into his bare chest.

“It’s late, baby,” he replied while gently rubbing my back.

“But I feel like I should. I haven’t seen him since our wedding… oh my god, I haven’t seen my bother since our wedding!” I said as I sat up quickly

Adam’s been too busy with his band for us to have a conversation with each other. I usually give him his space on tour, but now with Kirstie losing her brother, it made me want to talk to mine. I didn’t care what time it was. He’s in a band; they’re up late. I called him.

“Ky, I love you, but… do you realize what time it is?” he asked. I had obviously woken him up… but I didn’t care.

“I know and I’m sorry. I just needed to hear your voice,” I sighed, feeling Todd’s hand rest gently on my back as I rubbing my forehead with my free hand.

“Um… ok,” he replied. He probably thinks I’m crazy right now.

“Yeah, I was just lying in bed with Todd and I realized I haven’t talked to you since we got married… that’s way too long,” I explained…most of it.

“You think about me when you’re in bed with Todd?” he questioned. Even though he had just woken up, I could hear a smirk in his voice. I smiled weakly, but a heavy sigh came out of me. “Why do I feel like there’s a deeper meaning for why you called?” he went on.

“Something happened today and it just made me feel like I need to be a better sister,” I pushed out, feeling my eyes start to sting.

“Ky, I couldn’t ask for a better sister,” he replied. “Or brother-in-law… I guess,” he teased, making me smile. “What happened?”

“Shaun passed away,” I pushed out while a single tear ran down my cheek. Todd noticed and quickly sat up and held me against him.

“Miller?” he questioned, showing no signs of ever being asleep now.

“Yeah,” I sighed, getting pretty close to losing it.

But then he went on to ask me what happened. It took me a while to get him to understand through my sobs, but… he got the gist of it. We didn’t really talk after that. He just seemed shocked and I was bawling so I couldn’t talk. But when we got off the phone, he just told me to be with Todd and Ty. I didn’t argue with him. I was planning on doing that anyway if Tyson wasn’t sleeping.

Once I put my phone down, I clung to Todd. He held onto me and cradled my head as it lay on his shoulder just like he does with Ty. I may be bawling my eyes out, but… I’m so glad he’s right here with me.

After my crying had slowed, I leaned up and wiped my tears away. Todd’s warm hand came up and cleared away the ones that I missed. He sent me a weak smile before leaving the softest kiss on my forehead.

“I love you,” I whispered once I laid my head back on his shoulder.

“I love you too,” he replied in the same way, but adding little kisses that he knew made me feel better.

I found sleep hard for me the rest of the night. But I was ok for the most part. Todd was there holding me. But in the back of my mind was Kirstie. I knew Josh was there for her, but… what if that wasn’t enough for her?